This is my first thread to start and GOD I never thought it would be something like this!
My girlfriend and i have been together for 2 years, and it has been pretty good. Of course we fight now and again, but for the most part we have been extremely happy and very much in love. Here lately, she has been depressed about not having a lot of money, and not being in college yet. I am 23 and she is 19 by the way. She is also bi-polar, and she hasn't been able to get her meds, although it isn't extreme bi-polar. So she decided that she wanted to break up so that she wouldn't have any strings holding her back. I took it like a man, and said "okay honey, if you think this is what you need to do, then i want you to do it and be happy." Right now we live together, so it made it sort of awkward. One day later she realized that she wanted to be with me and not break up. I saw it coming, so it wasn't a big deal. HAPPY AGAIN! Two dsays later she gets in anothther one of her moods, and it's time to break up. This time i decided that it was BS and let her know. I told her that she can't keep doing this to me. Breaking up, then coming back. She told me this time was for real, and that when i had the money, i needed to find a place to live. I got upset, cried all that. She just stood there and stared at me like it was nothing. Anyways, i came to work and tried to go on like it was a normal day. Here's the horrible situation. All the time this has been goign on, one of her ex boyfriend's (they have remained friends) grnadfather died, and he was coming back in from over seas to attend the funeral. We were still together when he came in, and I am not a jealous or over possessive kind of guy, so I had no problem with her hanging out with him. You know for comfort and all.
We have not actually broken up at any point. Just decided that we were going to soon. So, I tell her i love her, she says it back, and i go to work. She told me that her and her ex were going to hang out for a little while and she would stop by work when she left his house. (You can probrably see where this is going) While I was at work, i told myself that I wasn't going to let this happen. I was going to fight for us to be together. I love this girl with everything in me, and I don't think it's worth loosing her. I wrote a long letter for her, explaining that i wanted to be with her, and that I would do anything to keep her. So, she comes up to my work, and I sort of give her a quick version of the letter and tell her that i would do anything for her. She is a hopless romantic, and she started crying and ran to give me a hug. I asked her "Is this what you wanted? For me to fight for you?" She shook her head yes, and I thought for a minute that she just wanted to know that she really means that much to me. Then it comes.
"I did something really bad..." My heart drops to the floor. I thought OMG she kissed her ex. "Did you mess around with him or something?" Nothing. "Did you have sex with him?" She just stands there. At this point i am watching her jump on my heart over and over. I rage at first. "What the FUCK is wrong with you????" Blah blah blah. "I'm sorry honey, I do wat to be with you" and all that. I love this girl more than anything in the world, and I want to forgive her so increadibly much. I want to live the rest of my life with her and marry her. But what the hell do I do. Everytime that she gets into a certain mood it seems, she tries to break it off.
Okay, so know she wants to be with me and swears never to do anything like this again. She tells me that she wants to be with me forever and raise a family with me. I want that too, but I don't know if I can forgive her. Everyone makes mistakes I know that. I have made many. The old saying once a cheater always a cheater sits in my mind, but I really don't believe it. Am I wrong? I just need a little advise. Has anything similar happened to any of you? This is the second time I have been cheated on in a long term relationship, only the first time, I pretty much deserved it. Here's what you need to know. I love her very much, and in part, want to forgive her. Will she do it again? By that, i know none of you know her personally, but from previous experiences, what do you all think. Man this hurts so bad. Any advise is much appreciated. Thanks in advance PA.