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Does anyone feel like their life is over after college?
EliteLamer
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Yeah I know life is supposed to just be starting after college but I don't really feel that way. I see it more as the rest of my life I am going to be working a job and my social life going out the window. My job isn't going to really expose me to people that I can do anything with because Im guessing everyone is going to be much older then me at my type of work. I know I shouldn't be freaking out just yet since things are going to get better for me as I transfer over from a community college to a University but then once there I can no longer take my time I have to complete so many credit hours a year or they will kick me out.
At college you just have so many things to do, clubs, rec rooms, free events but once out working a job you no longer get access to that type of stuff. I just don't see my self have much stuff to do besides pay bills.. Anyone felt like this before? How did everything turn out once you started working your job.
At college you just have so many things to do, clubs, rec rooms, free events but once out working a job you no longer get access to that type of stuff. I just don't see my self have much stuff to do besides pay bills.. Anyone felt like this before? How did everything turn out once you started working your job.
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There are plenty of places to meet adults. Bar and church springs to mind, albeit as places I wouldn't want to go.
Library? Gun club? Gym?
I shoot a pistol and I have been around gun club people at the range. Some weird people man.. Library? Confused on how you would meet people in a place that is a quiet place.
The only difference between college and a job is you now have to work 8 or so hours during the day instead of classes. Saying a library is a quiet place is pretty much a misnomer most of them have activities and are a gathering places for the local community. As for the free events they are probably no longer free but you have a job and money now, go spend it. Is a rec room a gym? If so then go get a membership at one. Gyms also usually offer classes in all sorts of things where you can meet people. Basically anything you had access to in college you probably still have access to it will just cost money now.
Also just because people aren't your age doesn't its not fun to hang out with them. Most of the people at my work are mid 30s to 40s and we go to the bar once a week or so and hang out.
"Oh hey, I notice you've got Everybody Poops there. I really enjoyed the pooping." etc etc.
I dunno I would say depression is chemical but my problems would be caused from lack of something, feeling like I am always missing something. Not to mention I have felt like shit ever since I threw away the women that wanted to marry me.
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I hate this time of year more then anything. I can't stand the entire month especially being out of school for like 3 weeks leaves me with nothing to do.
I want to stay as long as possible because I see life getting worse once out of college.
Maybe not the best advice, but I made a friend who owns a dive bar and ended up getting a job that was a couple blocks away.
I starting hanging out around happy hour, and it was great. Around that time you usually get a pretty consistent mix of people who all get to know each other and basically just hang out and unwind together. Very Cheers. Now that I'm in school again I really miss the place.
So maybe find a regular place, meet some people there, and keep going back.
Actually, I've heard this is not an uncommon fear, though I don't think I had any close friends who felt this way.
Life after college is great. You're still young. You still have very few responsibilities. You're likely making more money than you ever have before.
After college, I discovered I only thought I partied hard in college. Adults can have fun too you know. I started going to art gallery openings, going to a lot more rock shows, going to underground art parties, and meeting all kinds of new people I would've never met the likes of in college.
College is great, but it's sort of an enclosed environment, there's a whole world waiting for you when you're done and you can do whatever you want with it. All you have to do is get off your ass and go do something.
1) Go get a book called "The Quarterlife Crisis". It's good.
2) Do NOT go crazy with the money you make right out of school. Think out your purchases. I've gotten myself into lots of trouble, but it's a lesson that I've got ingrained in my mind now.
3) Defintely get a hobby. For me, it's cycling.
4) You need to find a new social outlet too. Above all else, this is the thing I'm still having problems with almost 4 years after graduation. Granted, I moved to a different state, but still.
i mean, jesus christ, as individuals, we're capable of so much, but we do so little.
why don't you try to be innovative in whatever you do, do something creative, something that'll actually put something worthwhile in your life, if just being a 9 to 5er doesn't float your boat. for some people, doing a job like that is what their life amounts to, and they're fine with it. hobbies on the side and whatnot.
maybe you're not one of those people. get an idea, start your own company?
most of all, most of all
someone said true love was dead
but i'm bound to fall
bound to fall for you
oh what can i do
I feel that way too. I see my self having a company on the side but not as a full time thing..
YES. I'm glad there are some idealistic people left in this world.
And EliteLamer, I feel ya. It's very easy to get weary of the future when you see so many jaded, cynical adults around you who lead mediocre lives and laugh at your ideals calling you naive ("Oh, you'll find out soon
But look at all this crazy creativity that's going on with fresh-out-of-college youth nowadays. You have all these independent companies going on: music, magazines, t-shirts, etc. Seriously, there is a hobby in everything. And there's a business in every hobby.
You seem like a social person. Move into a city or somewhere that has the energy of a city. Your environment is extremely important. Cities are awesome cause they can't be beat in diversity when it comes to people. You'll meet people who have similar interests easily when the population and density is so enormous.
Have optimism for what lies ahead of college, cause that's when shit really, REALLY starts, both good and bad. And the good can be oh so rewarding if you just put in the time, effort and creativity.
Now here's something that most people don't know: There are still clubs and organization out there outside of college. Check your local listings, or at least the internet. You may find book clubs, hiking clubs, etc. It's not in the structured college environment, but they're still out there if you look. They will likely not come to you.
Something else to consider, and I mean really think about it really long and hard (huhuh): Are you really studying or planning something you want to do, or are you just pursuing something that you think is stable and will keep you financially secure? Think carefully, because maybe it is what you really want to do. I don't know you, so I can't say. But in my own life, that's what I did, and I got stuck in the job I'm in now. This has lead to me being in therapy, which has brought forth something interesting I never thought about, that being that I actually hate what I'm doing and always have on some level, but stuck with it because it paid well and kept me comfortable. Don't get me wrong, I like being comfortable as much as the next person, but when I really thought about it, it was not the most important thing to me. So I've been looking at graduate programs that are more akin to my style and what I really want to do. It can be really scary giving that stuff up, but it could be worse down the road if you don't. Just a suggestion. I may be talking out of my ass and ranting for no reason since what you doing may very well be your "bliss."
Seriously, see some other countries (you need money of course, but thats what working life is good for) - It will broaden you like you cant imagine. It will give you a real perspective on things and opens up a new phase of your life. You'll meet people and it gives you time to really decide what you want to do/be.
It places you outside your comfort zone, but I genuinely believe its the healthiest thing you can ever do.
There's probably more options for what to do with yourself once you're out of college, but they require more research than just "showing up at the student union."
There is adult "intramural" sports everywhere. Where old people just play sports for fun. Join some leagues if you're into that. Meet lots of people there.
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Thankfully, I didn't get a dog. My job got better and I forced myself to get out - coffee shops and bars. I called friends I was barely friends with in college and I started to become more social. Over time, I established a better social group than that of college, and I sort of broke out of it. It's hard to see the forest for the trees but it'll get better and you just need to keep your head up and put yourself outside of your situation. Make an effort! And keep in mind - no one wants to hang out with a Debbie Downer. The only kinds of people you'll attract with an attitude like that are ones that'll drag you deeper.