Zero Punctuation: Retard Reaction Wednesday

Pharezon

Life finds a way on the Planet Turok

MEIN FUHRER ATOMIKA and Sentient Cars

The adventures of pussy Nero and the cunt Dante

Uncharted Mummies of the Lost Ark

Developers, developers, convention

Mein Sim

Call of Grenade 4

Umbrella Chronicles has a great story

Mumorpuger!

Crysis and the Computer of Souls

Silent Hill Brooding Origins

Mario Galaxy is a pretty fun game with flaws

Mass Effect has words

Playing Guitar Hero with the Guys in a totally not gay way.

Assassin's little pony

Labrynith of F.E.A.R.

GABE NEWELL MEETS YAHTZEE

GSM AND HIS UNFUNNY PARODY

Revenge of the Brown Sith Castle

FAGBALLS AND THE RESCUING OF ZELDA!

MEDAL OF RUGGEDLY HANDSOMENESS

PRINCESS PEACH AND PAPER MARIOS

LOLPORTALS

TABULA RASA and COCK SALAD



SUNSHINE AHOY!

BOOB JOKES AND JAGGED ROCKS AHOY

BIOSHOCK!
WHAT WILL YOU CHOOSE?

COMPELLING REASONS!

He reviewed the Heavenly Sword Demo/Resident Evil 5 Trailer.
Oh yeah he also reviewed The Darkness demo and Fable: The Lost Chapters.

He does this every wednesday for The Escapist.

Enjoy.

Woodroez

I think this week's was the first time he miscut some audio. It's funny to me that he does the whole talking fast thing and then cuts himself off in the audio.

worst first response ever?

Pancake

Woodroez wrote: »

I think this week's was the first time he miscut some audio. It's funny to me that he does the whole talking fast thing and then cuts himself off in the audio.

worst first response ever?

Definitely not the first time. He's done it several times in the past. It's usually at the very, very end of the last word of a sentence and the cut is pretty noticeable.

Tal

Nah. I've missed a few weeks though, and as I've just caught up I'd like to say there has been nothing funnier than watching him talk about Guitar Hero III.

Mblackwell

Woodroez wrote: »

worst first response ever?

I think that award goes to Katrina rescue crews.

*rimshot*


I thought this week worked out okay, although for some reason it didn't feel as... exciting to me.

RichardTauber

Is this where all the cool kids hang out?

edit: his hat is still ugly.

Malkor

Well, I'm cool, and yes this is where I hang out. So...

Hearthjaw

RichardTauber wrote: »

Is this where all the cool kids hang out?

edit: his hat is still ugly.

You can say what you want about him. But you keep the hat out of it. His hat is awesome.

plufim

I just watched them all in one setting. Glorious.

Had a look at some of his old comics though, and... well.

He's gotten better.

PatboyX

Mblackwell wrote: »

Woodroez wrote: »

worst first response ever?

I think that award goes to Katrina rescue crews.

*rimshot*


I thought this week worked out okay, although for some reason it didn't feel as... exciting to me.

There is a joke (sort of, maybe) at the end about having done Mass Effect so can he do what he wants. He also seemed to point out that if you liked KOTOR you will like this game. Which is actually useful review-esque information. I love his stuff but I don't usually find myself using his reviews as a basis for if I would actually like a game.

Doc Holliday

It's funny because he's angry!

I like his little animations most of all. I wonder if he does those himself

KrunkMcGrunk

Alright, back to Tim Fuckley for a second.

The drawing I was looking for literally had him with ham-hands. I don't think it was a comic, but just a sketch that Gabe did. I must have seen it in SE++ the first time.

plufim

KrunkMcGrunk wrote: »

Alright, back to Tim Fuckley for a second.

The drawing I was looking for literally had him with ham-hands. I don't think it was a comic, but just a sketch that Gabe did. I must have seen it in SE++ the first time.

http://www.starslipcrisis.com/ham/

KrunkMcGrunk

plufim wrote: »

KrunkMcGrunk wrote: »

Alright, back to Tim Fuckley for a second.

The drawing I was looking for literally had him with ham-hands. I don't think it was a comic, but just a sketch that Gabe did. I must have seen it in SE++ the first time.

http://www.starslipcrisis.com/ham/

That's it!

plufim

KrunkMcGrunk wrote: »

plufim wrote: »

KrunkMcGrunk wrote: »

Alright, back to Tim Fuckley for a second.

The drawing I was looking for literally had him with ham-hands. I don't think it was a comic, but just a sketch that Gabe did. I must have seen it in SE++ the first time.

http://www.starslipcrisis.com/ham/

That's it!

Hehe... Tim really has no friends in the webcomic community. For so many reasons.

AlejandroDaJ

I read more of that blog link that was posted in the other thread.

Jesus, this guy is vicious. I'll admit I had a laugh reading his bit on CAD, but then while scrolling through his archives, I saw that he's also gone after PvP and VGC. There's only a handful of webcomics I read, so I don't know if he decided to go after any other comic that could be construed as "good," at least, but I don't know what to think when that shtick leads him to go after sacred cows.

I mean, he starts off his PvP article just going off endlessly about how Kurtz is fat, and then castigates Ransoomair with accusations of being a furry-lover and hating his anime-ish facial expressions.

There's criticism and then there's criticism, but sometimes there's also people who just don't deserve the power that a damned internet connection gives them, imho.

Khavall

Edit: Never mind. I misread.

PatboyX

AlejandroDaJ wrote: »

I read more of that blog link that was posted in the other thread.

Jesus, this guy is vicious. I'll admit I had a laugh reading his bit on CAD, but then while scrolling through his archives, I saw that he's also gone after PvP and VGC. There's only a handful of webcomics I read, so I don't know if he decided to go after any other comic that could be construed as "good," at least, but I don't know what to think when that shtick leads him to go after sacred cows.

I mean, he starts off his PvP article just going off endlessly about how Kurtz is fat, and then castigates Ransoomair with accusations of being a furry-lover and hating his anime-ish facial expressions.

There's criticism and then there's criticism, but sometimes there's also people who just don't deserve the power that a damned internet connection gives them, imho.

I think the problem is the writers run dry. He could just write a long article called "What Makes Webcomics Suck" and go into the details he uses in each piece with examples from all the comics he picks. Instead, he makes individual articles for every webcomic that mostly suffer the same problems. So he is faced with the choice to repeat himself or attack specific and somewhat irrelevant topics.

shryke

AlejandroDaJ wrote: »

I read more of that blog link that was posted in the other thread.

Jesus, this guy is vicious. I'll admit I had a laugh reading his bit on CAD, but then while scrolling through his archives, I saw that he's also gone after PvP and VGC. There's only a handful of webcomics I read, so I don't know if he decided to go after any other comic that could be construed as "good," at least, but I don't know what to think when that shtick leads him to go after sacred cows.

I mean, he starts off his PvP article just going off endlessly about how Kurtz is fat, and then castigates Ransoomair with accusations of being a furry-lover and hating his anime-ish facial expressions.

There's criticism and then there's criticism, but sometimes there's also people who just don't deserve the power that a damned internet connection gives them, imho.

I thought he was spot on with all 3 of the big ones I knew (PvP, CAD and VGCats).

And I think the bit on Kurtz at the start of the PvP article is just the best, most epic fat joke I've ever read.

gilrain

Eh, Kurtz is fat -- so's my dad, and I still love him. His comic is bland and uninspired, but I wouldn't say it's shit like some comics out there. We have such a great selection of comics, these days, I think we've gotten (rightfully) very picky.

KrunkMcGrunk

You know what, I think PvP sucks, but Scott Kurtz is really good at trolling other webcomic authors.

cooljammer00

Pancake wrote: »

Woodroez wrote: »

I think this week's was the first time he miscut some audio. It's funny to me that he does the whole talking fast thing and then cuts himself off in the audio.

worst first response ever?

Definitely not the first time. He's done it several times in the past. It's usually at the very, very end of the last word of a sentence and the cut is pretty noticeable.

I knew he couldn't talk that fast for realsies.

cooljammer00

and maybe this isn't a good justification, as CAD has its own versions out there, but PvP is syndicated, isnt it? Doesnt that still mean something?

Cherrn

I think the blog dude is spot on as well. I never liked gaming comics, aside from PA. I don't hate PvP, but I don't think it's funny, and VGcats is just obnoxious.

But I will admit I'm picky. The only webcomics I actually like are Perry Bible Fellowship and Red Meat. Dinosaur Comics can be funny as well, but it's not something I would check every day.

Kyougu

Can I have the link to the blog posts everyone is talking about? I'm curious now.

Houk

http://badwebcomics.blogspot.com/

whitey9

HAH! All this from a several second jab at webcomics. I think he's right, which is why I don't ever read them. It's been said that PA is successful because it's good characters interacting with videogames, where CAD is just stupid people interacting with video games. It's like Christian movies, they're just so happy to see something they know referenced on screen that they'll gobble that shit up even if it sucks.

HEY! A comic about Everquest 2! I know it's not funny, but I've played that game, hahaha!

FireWeasel

whitey9 wrote: »

HAH! All this from a several second jab at webcomics. I think he's right, which is why I don't ever read them. It's been said that PA is successful because it's good characters interacting with videogames, where CAD is just stupid people interacting with video games. It's like Christian movies, they're just so happy to see something they know referenced on screen that they'll gobble that shit up even if it sucks.

HEY! A comic about Everquest 2! I know it's not funny, but I've played that game, hahaha!

I didn't think much at all about the Mass Effect review...it just seemed painfully lazy to me.

Though I did appreciate the CAD jab, because sweet GOD is it ever unfunny. I mean...ugh.

Fiaryn

I felt this one didn't have as much of a basis in fact. Too many words? Hell, it felt to me like Mass Effect spent too much time having me roam around shooting shit on uncharted worlds and not enough exploring the stories of those uncharted worlds. After the Citadel finishes up, the chatting becomes pretty limited.

And "didn't figure out to install a weapon mod untill six hours in"? Really? Really?

Ghandi 2

Yeah, I don't see how Yahtzee, who claims to want clever games, could really have taken so long to figure out such a fucking simple part of the game. Unless he only claims to want clever games, but in reality has great difficulty figuring them out, which is why he doesn't like RPGs. And I just don't understand, "Oh, I usually look at the manual, but I didn't this time for some reason, and I sure as hell am not going to now that I just discovered I missed an entire feature" I understand the macho attitude of ignoring the manual, but I don't get where he's coming from there. And didn't he hear about the lack of in-game tutorials? Everyone was bitching about it so much.

FireWeasel

Fiaryn wrote: »

I felt this one didn't have as much of a basis in fact. Too many words? Hell, it felt to me like Mass Effect spent too much time having me roam around shooting shit on uncharted worlds and not enough exploring the stories of those uncharted worlds. After the Citadel finishes up, the chatting becomes pretty limited.

And "didn't figure out to install a weapon mod untill six hours in"? Really? Really?

That's kinda my point.

Too many words...OH NO I AM GIVEN THE OPPORTUNITY TO READ COMPLETELY OPTIONAL DEPTH AND BACKSTORY IF I WISH BOO TO YOU GAME / didn't read the manual, then whine about not knowing how to do something / side-quests unimportant, yadda yadda.

And he wonders why he's viewed more as entertainment rather than an actual reviewer?

I can accept valid criticisms, but this is just laziness.

Houk

FireWeasel wrote: »

Too many words...OH NO I AM GIVEN THE OPPORTUNITY TO READ COMPLETELY OPTIONAL DEPTH AND BACKSTORY IF I WISH BOO TO YOU GAME / didn't read the manual, then whine about not knowing how to do something / side-quests unimportant, yadda yadda.

And he wonders why he's viewed more as entertainment rather than an actual reviewer?

I can accept valid criticisms, but this is just laziness.

I dunno if maybe you skipped some of the words in this thread, but it's been brought up a few times that it's possible, and highly likely, that his problem wasn't with there being lots of words. It was with there being lots of words that really amounted to a whole lot of nothing, and were thrown at you in dull and meaningless ways.

But I mean, straw men are fun too, I guess.

FireWeasel

Houk wrote: »

FireWeasel wrote: »

Too many words...OH NO I AM GIVEN THE OPPORTUNITY TO READ COMPLETELY OPTIONAL DEPTH AND BACKSTORY IF I WISH BOO TO YOU GAME / didn't read the manual, then whine about not knowing how to do something / side-quests unimportant, yadda yadda.

And he wonders why he's viewed more as entertainment rather than an actual reviewer?

I can accept valid criticisms, but this is just laziness.

I dunno if maybe you skipped some of the words in this thread, but it's been brought up a few times that it's possible, and highly likely, that his problem wasn't with there being lots of words. It was with there being lots of words that really amounted to a whole lot of nothing, and were thrown at you in dull and meaningless ways.

But I mean, straw men are fun too, I guess.

So is needless snarkiness, I guess.

I mean, I chose to use my interpretation of the video as the basis for my opinions rather than other forumers. Accursed independent thought and all that.

No need to get snippy.

Houk

FireWeasel wrote: »

Houk wrote: »

FireWeasel wrote: »

Too many words...OH NO I AM GIVEN THE OPPORTUNITY TO READ COMPLETELY OPTIONAL DEPTH AND BACKSTORY IF I WISH BOO TO YOU GAME / didn't read the manual, then whine about not knowing how to do something / side-quests unimportant, yadda yadda.

And he wonders why he's viewed more as entertainment rather than an actual reviewer?

I can accept valid criticisms, but this is just laziness.

I dunno if maybe you skipped some of the words in this thread, but it's been brought up a few times that it's possible, and highly likely, that his problem wasn't with there being lots of words. It was with there being lots of words that really amounted to a whole lot of nothing, and were thrown at you in dull and meaningless ways.

But I mean, straw men are fun too, I guess.

So is needless snarkiness, I guess.

I mean, I chose to use my interpretation of the video as the basis for my opinions rather than other forumers. Accursed independent thought and all that.

No need to get snippy.

Eh. I wouldn't consider my tone any worse than yours. It just sounded like you were ready to interpret what he said in the worst way possible so that you could tear it down and call him a lazy idiot for shitting on something you apparently enjoy. I was just trying to point out that maybe there were other ways of interpreting it that you hadn't considered.

And needless snarkiness is pretty much the life-blood of the internet (see the source of this thread and its many responses), so I'm not ready to apologize for that just yet.

FireWeasel

Houk wrote: »

FireWeasel wrote: »

Houk wrote: »

FireWeasel wrote: »

Too many words...OH NO I AM GIVEN THE OPPORTUNITY TO READ COMPLETELY OPTIONAL DEPTH AND BACKSTORY IF I WISH BOO TO YOU GAME / didn't read the manual, then whine about not knowing how to do something / side-quests unimportant, yadda yadda.

And he wonders why he's viewed more as entertainment rather than an actual reviewer?

I can accept valid criticisms, but this is just laziness.

I dunno if maybe you skipped some of the words in this thread, but it's been brought up a few times that it's possible, and highly likely, that his problem wasn't with there being lots of words. It was with there being lots of words that really amounted to a whole lot of nothing, and were thrown at you in dull and meaningless ways.

But I mean, straw men are fun too, I guess.

So is needless snarkiness, I guess.

I mean, I chose to use my interpretation of the video as the basis for my opinions rather than other forumers. Accursed independent thought and all that.

No need to get snippy.

Eh. I wouldn't consider my tone any worse than yours. It just sounded like you were ready to interpret what he said in the worst way possible so that you could tear it down and call him a lazy idiot for shitting on something you apparently enjoy. I was just trying to point out that maybe there were other ways of interpreting it that you hadn't considered.

And needless snarkiness is pretty much the life-blood of the internet (see the source of this thread and its many responses), so I'm not ready to apologize for that just yet.

As I mentioned, I accept valid criticisms, but given his past history of Entertainment Vs. Valid Review-style Criticism, I thought he had established a pretty good pattern of behavior that didn't require "benefit of the doubt"-style interpretation.

And given your presence in these forums, I woulda figured you'd have known that trying to point out alternate interpretations through veiled insults is Rather Ineffective. Missed messages and all that.

Look, I find him funny. I'm just saying, as a review, it's lazy and does nothing for this cred he's apparently trying to achieve. That's all.

No need to go knocking other forumers over it, especially over an ironic interpretation of your own that uses "HEY GIVE HIM THE BENEFIT OF THE DOUBT" as its basis.

ANYWAY.

Lol lol Mass Erect lol.

Houk

FireWeasel wrote: »

As I mentioned, I accept valid criticisms, but given his past history of Entertainment Vs. Valid Review-style Criticism, I thought he had established a pretty good pattern of behavior that didn't require "benefit of the doubt"-style interpretation.

And given your presence in these forums, I woulda figured you'd have known that trying to point out alternate interpretations through veiled insults is Rather Ineffective. Missed messages and all that.

Look, I find him funny. I'm just saying, as a review, it's lazy and does nothing for this cred he's apparently trying to achieve. That's all.

No need to go knocking other forumers over it, especially over an ironic interpretation of your own that uses "HEY GIVE HIM THE BENEFIT OF THE DOUBT" as its basis.

ANYWAY.

Lol lol Mass Erect lol.

I wouldn't really call it benefit of the doubt, since when I watched it that's exactly how I took him to mean it. It wasn't 'well maybe he meant it this way', it was 'if you ask me this is what he meant'. And I don't think I insulted you - I just implied that you attacked him for an opinion I don't think (yes, in my opinion) he actually expressed.

Basically, your post came off as one of many "I normally like him but now that he is making fun of something I like so now I don't like him" posts that he spawns around here. And while, yes, he didn't seem to put as much of himself into this review as normal, his points were still perfectly valid in my view. Even though I did enjoy the game and did enjoy portions of the story and text.

whitey9

Houk wrote: »

"I normally like him but now that he is making fun of something I like so now I don't like him"

Nothing is funnier than the turnaround from "HAH, Yahtzee is a funny guy, you should see him tear into Paper Mario" to "FUCK HIM, MASS EFFECT WAS BRILLIANT AND HE'S FUCKING STUPID FOR INSULTING AN INCREDIBLE STORY". Kotaku posted this video and the comments are all similar. Even more maddening is the thought that people were up in arms when he said he didn't like JRPG's in the Paper Mario review. O_o

My beef with games like Mass Effect is the notion that deep story = long story. It's like they had a meeting and said "Shit, just write a book and sprinkle it into the game. If they want to read it all, they can. That's deep, right?".

gilrain

I love him all the time, but certainly don't consider him a reviewer. Mass Erect was funny, and I'm surprised I hadn't seen that pun before. The rest of the "review" was justified to me with a chuckle with his ending blurb of "yes, that was all just leading up to the pun." :^:

Yahtzee is a damn funny entertainer. :P

Houk

And I really don't think we need to get back into the 'is he a REAL reviewer?!' thing either. That way lies madness.

shryke

Re: Too many Words

I think the difference is that the dialogue in Mass Effect is all spoken.

The problem, I believe, is that you can read text ALOT faster then it can be spoken. Lots of text can be skimmed or just skipped. When a speech isn't interesting you, it really seems to drag on and on.

As much as I hated to admit it, I think he does have a point. Once your using speech instead of text, you wanna pare it down a bit to keep it from dragging. Written =/= Spoken, as any writer can tell you. What works on the page doesn't work on the stage*.

Basically, switching to speech requires some tightening up of the writing.

Just an idea anyway.


*Wow, that rhymed and I didn't even see it coming.

Hearthjaw

FireWeasel wrote: »

And he wonders why he's viewed more as entertainment rather than an actual reviewer?

I can accept valid criticisms, but this is just laziness.

Huh, I don't think, he really gives a shit about whether or not people think he's an actual reviewer or just an entertainer (although personally there's nothing wrong with being the latter rather then the former).