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Dating Q: ballsy first move or mistake?
Iamjackssmugpride
Registered User regular
Registered User regular
So I finally go and get renter's insurance on the new place and the 'agent' or whatever was very cute. We ended up talking about a myriad of stuff and she mentioned an x (as in a she's currently single sort of way) when we were talking posessions. I made wise cracks and think we hit it off well; she was smiling laughing maybe even flirting. Kinda got 'cock blocked' by her boss getting into a filing cabinet near her and striking up a conversation with me. Everything was going quite well prior.
Problem- the boss cutting us short left me with little room to 'work' with. All I have is her work email.
Is it ballsy first move or mistake to shoot an email there?
I am leaning towards the whole I have nothing to loose here and should shoot for it.
Problem- the boss cutting us short left me with little room to 'work' with. All I have is her work email.
Is it ballsy first move or mistake to shoot an email there?
I am leaning towards the whole I have nothing to loose here and should shoot for it.
Iamjackssmugpride on
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CUZ THERE'S SOMETHING IN THE MIDDLE AND IT'S GIVING ME A RASH
kyougu- impossible do to where i work vs where she works. I took a half day to do this.
Call up and ask her some silly question about the rent or apartment... like " I'm going to put mail forwarding on my post box today, but I forgot to ask... what will be my new mailing address?" and then an "oh and hey, I remember you said you liked X... well, I just happen to have two X tickets dropped in my lap, etc, etc " and then ask her out or something.
If she doesn't call the police, you're home free.
huh? What is the "shocker"?
He said it takes him half a day to drive all the way over there... can he do the "shocker" over the phone or email?
No, you can't do the "shocker" over the phone or email. In fact, just don't do it.
If you have no other reason to go to the office, shoot her an email; tell her you had a great conversation and want to know if she'd be interested in going out for drinks sometime.
AHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA
...oh god
The Shocker
Now down to business. You should be alright to email, phoning is your preferred method. Does she live anywhere near where she works? That could be a painful commute.
Steam | Live
Limed for truth. Go for it, man. The most you have to lose is that she's not interested, which isn't really a bad consequence (because if she isn't when you ask, that means she wasn't before... you'll have lost nothing for it).
But definitely go for it in person. Remember that you don't really have to interact with those front office people at all either once you've moved in, so if it doesn't work out there won't be any uneasiness.
Don't be that creepy stalker guy. This is her place of work. Don't make her feel uncomfortable there.
I'm not saying be the creepy stalker guy! It's far less creepy to come to her work than to E-Mail her if she doesn't know. Far less.
I don't even think it would be creepy at all. I mean, if you came by a lot afterwords that'd be creepy, but coming once... I mean, when else is he supposed to talk to her?
EDIT: What I'm saying is that the E-Mail would seem more creepy, because she doesn't know he has her E-Mail. To me, I'd be more freaked out if I got an unexpected E-Mail from a resident asking me out than if they came by. At least when they come by, it shows that they only have one way through which they know you... and they're not doing something wierd to get other information (even if the information wasn't actually obtained through wierd ways).
Going to ask her in person, in the only place he knows (or ought to know) he can locate her, seems not only un-creepy but reasonable. I mean, in comparison to his other options. It's not perfect, but there's really not a situation that isn't creepy in SOME way.
I mean you could say the same if they met in school and he asked her after class. You could say the same if he saw her at a bar. Every situation has the potential to be creepy. It's how you handle yourself during and afterwords that determines if it's actually creepy... and, of course, if she reciprocates.
OP, I think your best bet is an email, definitely. Say something like "Hey, this is X, we talked last Tuesday (or whatever) and I had a lot of fun. If you'd like to go get drinks sometime so we can talk about potted plants (or whatever you were talking about), here's my number. Bye!"
Going to her place of work is much creepier, especially if it's half a day away. An email says "casual contact," a long trek? Stalkerish and gross.
Edited to say: it's also far easier for her to just ignore the email or shoot off a "sorry, I'm too busy" if she's not interested, which will also put her more at her ease. You don't want to drive for half a day to get turned down, do you?
If she handed you her card and went an extra step further, like write down her cell number at the back of the card or something, I'd call her.
You have to think in context: she is an insurance agent and being friendly to customers is her job.
I mean sure, you have nothing to lose, so from that perspective it's OK. It's not worth putting this much thought into it though.
I'd go for the middle road: call her and tell her you had a question about your insurance and then ask her something. Doesn't matter whether you actually needed to ask her or not. Then say "hey, you know I really had fun talking to you when I came down...how about a drink sometime?"
Never, ever ask anyone out via email or IM.
Even phone is a bit impersonal in my opinion.
Some people are friendly to clients to make a sale or to give good customer service.
She could of just been smooth talking you because her boss was standing there and she didn't want to look bitchy to customers.
But you said you're moving into this place? It means, that soon you'll be closer to her and even in the same building?
I used to flirt with the girls that worked at my apartment building... is that an option? Just wait till you move in and then talk to her if you see her around the building?
Oh... I somehow missed the "it's half a day away" thing.
You're right, I renig on my prior advice. Sorry about that. =( (me wil lern 2 redd sum dhay
I only correct you because that one could get you in trouble. :P
Really? Whoa... I've been misspelling that all my life.