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Buying Expensive Things From Friends And Why/How Not To:
Whiniest Man On Earth
Registered User regular
Registered User regular
My girlfriend recently bought a bike frame off of one of my best friends who lives across the country. When we decided to buy it, my friend (let's call her "E") said that she'd give me a great deal on it. It's worth about $1100, she says, and she'll sell it for like $700.
My girlfriend (let's call her "A") decides to buy the bike, but doesn't have enough money at the time. She asks E if she will hold on to it for a while and wait for A to come back from her trip out of the country. E agrees.
E later decides to send the frame out after much waiting about, and says "Oh don't worry, you can just pay me over time, as long as I get it eventually it's fine." This didn't worry me at all, because we're so tight that I didn't expect anything to go wrong. A sends her $300 right away, and later I send her $400 when E tells me she's tight on money and wants it sooner rather than later.
Today, E calls me and we shoot the shit for a while, and I mention how times are tough for us financially since A got back into the country. I also mention that we might have to sell the frame. E says "Yeah, it must suck to sell something you're still paying off."
I go quiet for a second, and then manage to work the conversation tactfully towards her thinking that she sold us the bike for not a penny less than $1300. My jaw kind of drops and I politely excuse myself from the phone conversation.
Now, I need some advice on how to talk to my best friend about a situation like this. I am totally clueless when it comes to talking about money with people that I like. I am the type of person whose parents never, ever talked about money because we were always pretty damned poor, and it's not something I have even a remote skill with.
I also can offer some advice on buying expensive things from your friends. Don't do it.
My girlfriend (let's call her "A") decides to buy the bike, but doesn't have enough money at the time. She asks E if she will hold on to it for a while and wait for A to come back from her trip out of the country. E agrees.
E later decides to send the frame out after much waiting about, and says "Oh don't worry, you can just pay me over time, as long as I get it eventually it's fine." This didn't worry me at all, because we're so tight that I didn't expect anything to go wrong. A sends her $300 right away, and later I send her $400 when E tells me she's tight on money and wants it sooner rather than later.
Today, E calls me and we shoot the shit for a while, and I mention how times are tough for us financially since A got back into the country. I also mention that we might have to sell the frame. E says "Yeah, it must suck to sell something you're still paying off."
I go quiet for a second, and then manage to work the conversation tactfully towards her thinking that she sold us the bike for not a penny less than $1300. My jaw kind of drops and I politely excuse myself from the phone conversation.
Now, I need some advice on how to talk to my best friend about a situation like this. I am totally clueless when it comes to talking about money with people that I like. I am the type of person whose parents never, ever talked about money because we were always pretty damned poor, and it's not something I have even a remote skill with.
I also can offer some advice on buying expensive things from your friends. Don't do it.
Whiniest Man On Earth on
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Sounds fishy to me.
It sounds very nearly like an addict deciding they need more money and so they collect on debts that are already paid. I'm not calling your friend an addict, but it's something I've seen done more than once.
Mind you - while we were talking, she also said that $500 is owed on the bike, which would bring the total to $1200, not $1300... there's all kinds of mistakes going on.
She's not an addict, but I do think she's in a spot where she needs more money than she has.
In this case I don't know what you would do, but I can't imagine how she can hold you to $1300 considering the item is $1100 new. Do you have proof of paying her the $700 (checks or bank statements)?
Joking aside, was it written anywhere that it would be $700 (via e-mail, texting)? This could easily help in not appearing to be a cheat on either side of the equation.
If it was all verbal, you'll just have to stick to what you were told, and tell her that you agreed to a set price and nothing more.
Depending on how hard up she is for money, she might cause the friendship to break.
Depending how desperate E is, she may say something like "This scrape wasn't on it when I sold it to you, I'm going to have to keep $100"
I just went through a bunch of my old e-mails and couldn't find anything about it. I guess I'll just write her one of my own, since I'm so utterly confused.
There's no way in hell I ever would've agreed that $1300 was a fair price for the thing. Both A and I wouldn't have bought it if we would've known it was going to be that much. I don't want to ask her for the money back, because I'm not really into straining the friendship... but this is a ton of money to me.
Not helpful for now, but perhaps a lesson for the future.
Given that you both need money, why not send her the bike to sell it for the $1300 she claims it's worth and have her return the $700 to you? Both parties end up happy, right?
There really isn't a market value for this thing. It's kind of a collector's item - a one of a kind frame from a custom frame builder who passed away.
EDIT:
This is kind of what I'm thinking right now. Seems like good advice.
And yeah, I think the most sane advice at this point is to try to find another buyer for it. I'm sure you'll be able to if it's as nice a frame as you say it is.
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
It looks something like this.