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Terrible coworker thread / WaM & Keith are faggots for tea... faggots
neville
The Worst Gay(Seriously. The Worst!)Registered User regular
The Worst Gay(Seriously. The Worst!)Registered User regular
So everyone has one of those coworkers.
Weird... odd... doesn't shower often (ever?) enough.
Stories about those are great.
But some of us have been blessed with the next tier of coworker.
Yes... the type of coworker that you can say nothing in response to, except to back up slowly and pray your ass hits an emergency exit before he/she can catch up to you.
My story:
When I worked at a well-known Seattle media company a few years ago, people hated their jobs. So drinking was a common activity that most of us partook in. One particular day, we were having a farewell party for a coworker who was quitting and he comes up to me and says "I love you man!"
d'aww.
I told him "I love you too"
And then there's the 2 second pause before he says "No. I really love you."
My stammered response included "Uhhh, I think I... need to.... go..." and something about how he should love his wife and 2 kids and not some dude he was drinking with at work.
Every time this guy drinks, to this day in fact, he goes from straight to supergay in 4 drinks or less.
So tell us your tales of shock and horror.
(Auntie Shibbie tales :arrow:)
Weird... odd... doesn't shower often (ever?) enough.
Stories about those are great.
But some of us have been blessed with the next tier of coworker.
Yes... the type of coworker that you can say nothing in response to, except to back up slowly and pray your ass hits an emergency exit before he/she can catch up to you.
My story:
When I worked at a well-known Seattle media company a few years ago, people hated their jobs. So drinking was a common activity that most of us partook in. One particular day, we were having a farewell party for a coworker who was quitting and he comes up to me and says "I love you man!"
d'aww.
I told him "I love you too"
And then there's the 2 second pause before he says "No. I really love you."
My stammered response included "Uhhh, I think I... need to.... go..." and something about how he should love his wife and 2 kids and not some dude he was drinking with at work.
Every time this guy drinks, to this day in fact, he goes from straight to supergay in 4 drinks or less.
So tell us your tales of shock and horror.
(Auntie Shibbie tales :arrow:)
neville on
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It is not about Tea
I had the most delicious tea the other day (Roibos Chai with other stuff) and it was so good and I would spend so much money on tea if it wasn't expensive to get started
what's your favorite flavor of tea
I honestly think she wasn't all there.
wow, that's ... something.
really
do you WANT to open this can of worms from me
BECAUSE JESUS CHRIST
ahahahahah
i should type up an essay
EARL GREY RULES!!!
BRING IT
i don't know where to start
i'm over excited to share everything i possibly can with you
i drink like three cups of tea a day now. no sugar or cream, which is unusual for me
it's rooibos chai
but i'm like, too cool or good, to drink cheap american tea, you know?
She also wanted to fuck me, apparently, which I found out after she got fired.
She also saw me buy cigarettes one day and thought that "this place" had "changed" me.
She was dumb as a fencepost, engaged to a guy who had declared bankruptcy at the age of 20, and was convinced of the existence of ghosts.
so did you fuck her or what
Also I think I'm that coworker.
Need some stuff designed or printed? I can help with that.
he's also a self-centered, incompetent dick.
The issue is that his physical development was stunted or something. I'm not a doctor. All I know is that he's just shy of five feet tall and could pass for a slightly malformed Keebler elf
best tea on earth:
is it leaves?
it's probably leaves
i want to buy the equipment for that but dang it's expensive (for me)
except hot chocolate, and only like twice a year.
Need some stuff designed or printed? I can help with that.
the girl was like "would you like to try a sample? it's a chai with a very nutty flavor blah blah blah" and i'm thinking "man i'm not a fan of chais or nuts" but decided it was free so i should
and right away i was like "this is delicious" and bought a cup
it was so good
I am going to make a set cheesecake just for you for PAX
Only because you are just that rad.
what kind do you want?
Also if you do not say you love it a lot, I will kill you and mail you back to Australia in pieces.
- is 56+
- got her belly button pierced 2 years ago and made it a point to show me
- is an administrative assistant
- asks brokers etc about their love lives and will tell the same story about her kittens and whatnot OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER
- is over 16k in debt with a CC but continues to shop like she's a freaking Hilton
- got mad at me because it seemed like I was allergic to one of her perfumes
- didn't know what I meant when I referred to a "cell" in excel
- took credit for large modifications that i'd made in spreadsheets
- told me that i typed too much
- told another mail trolley girl, a long time ago when i was specifically her assistant, that she wished SHE (trolley girl) could be her assistant instead because she was into make up and fashion. (trolley girl was a friend of mine and told me this.
- repeats herself at least 5 times per sentence, i kid you not
- says such lovely phrases as "YKNOW?" and won't stop talking until you respond
- refers to asians as "orientals" and to black people simply as "the blacks"
- wears jewelry made for teenage girls that is over 125 dollars but features HELLO KITTY which, yes, she wears in the office
- constantly tells me about her thyroid, her neck, her back, her bunions, etc, and has told our boss etc that she can not lift even 3" binders due to these things -- whereas she is constantly buying bottles and bottles of wine and carrying that around
- dyes her hair bright fire engine red like 3 times a month and complains that the colour won't stay
- has no eyebrows, nor lips seemingly, and thus paints them in. her make up must take 30 minutes every day, at the least.
- long fake acrylic nails that have grown out so you can see actual cuticle, which i hear CLAKCLAKing on the keyboard all day
- talks on the phone to her boyfriend constantly, slurps soup loudly
- will not go on the internet because she is afraid of it
- also because she DOESN'T KNOW HOW
- has asked me if outlook could open MB files -- the file was picture.jpg (4mb). she complained that there were 4 of these MB files and none of them were opening no matter how much she clicked.
- told me that she refused to use the recycling bin next to her garbage can for paper because it was TOO HARD
- files things like A.W.X. Inc. after Awwtle Inc. - THAT IS SO WRONG. AUGH.
- has like fifteen lulu lemon jackets
- always regales me with the fact that "MY JOB IS SO HARD" and "YOU DONT WANT THIS JOB" and "ITS SO STRESSFUL YOU COULDNT HANDLE IT" -- she seems to not remember that i did it for 3 weeks WHILE keeping up with my own job
will post more later
there is so much more
Oh my god
you are the best!
I like them with strawberries or just plain with a little lemon or lime mixed in.
I will bring you a little something from here because I like you.
Need some stuff designed or printed? I can help with that.
you better get me something or else i'ma eat your cheesecake
looking it up, it seems to have coconut
gross
or is it that tea you and nap got at that place? that was all right, but i dunno if i could drink much of it
Shit, at the kitchen, my supervisor was going to get me a raise, if I hadn't gotten fired
I had only worked there for a month and he wanted to get me some extra money because he liked what I did
Umm...they both are pretty cool and I really have nothing bad to say about them.
One of them, however, loves to talk about his little dog. Like A LOT.
Luckily all the crappy people I worked with were fired.
Need some stuff designed or printed? I can help with that.
Got it, sir.
And ignore Keiths. His threats, like he himself, are tiny and inconsequential.