Penny Arcade Forums› Social Entropy++
The new forums will be named Coin Return (based on the most recent vote)! You can check on the status and timeline of the transition to the new forums here.
The Guiding Principles and New Rules document is now in effect.

Have you ever found porn in the woods?

scarlet ave.scarlet ave. Registered User regular
edited July 2008 in Social Entropy++
I chill over at Metafilter on occasion, and occasionally my patience is rewarded. Today I found this old post:

http://ask.metafilter.com/22130/Porn-in-the-woods

It looks like finding porn in the woods as a kid is a very common occurrence. I always assumed I was just lucky. Haven't stumbled upon porn in the woods in years, but since I live in the city now, that doesn't mean much.

Did you, as a kid, find porn in the woods?

scarlet ave. on
«134567

Posts

  • Centipede DamascusCentipede Damascus Ho! Ho! Ho! Drink Coke!Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    all I found in the woods as a kid were blackberry bushes and feral cats

    Centipede Damascus on
    bluesky/tumblr
    eZB497F.jpg
  • MonkeybombMonkeybomb Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    where's st.

    Monkeybomb on
    Xbox Live Gamertag: Triplemonkeybom
    monkeysig-1.jpg
  • World as MythWorld as Myth a breezy way to annoy serious people Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    one time I found bees in the woods

    World as Myth on
    kQwcZLJ.png
  • bongibongi regular
    edited July 2008
    i found a dead deer in the woods once

    bongi on
  • JavenJaven Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    World as Myth wrote: »
    one time I found bees in the woods

    BEADS?!

    Javen on
  • World as MythWorld as Myth a breezy way to annoy serious people Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Javen wrote: »
    World as Myth wrote: »
    one time I found bees in the woods

    BEADS?!
    javen's not on board

    World as Myth on
    kQwcZLJ.png
  • The GeekThe Geek Oh-Two Crew, Omeganaut Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited July 2008
    Found a Hustler in a vacant, weed-filled lot next to a sports field complex once.

    The Geek on
    BLM - ACAB
  • RankenphileRankenphile Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood.Registered User, Moderator Mod Emeritus
    edited July 2008
    I've found porn in the woods at least half a dozen times in my life.

    Rankenphile on
    8406wWN.png
  • RankenphileRankenphile Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood.Registered User, Moderator Mod Emeritus
    edited July 2008
    it makes you wonder, though

    who are all these strange men going out in the woods and leaving their porn laying around?

    Rankenphile on
    8406wWN.png
  • FandyienFandyien But Otto, what about us? Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    The first porn I ever saw was a playboy anniversary edition someone left out in the rain on my street. I was 12, my friends and I biked past it. I picked up and thought it was an exercise magazine at first, since there was a lady dildoing herself with a giant purple dildo. I was all, "hmm, whats she doing? i wonder what that machine does? is that a vagina?"

    I then smuggled it into my house and kept it stashed for years. I have no idea where the pages I tore out and kept are now, though.

    Fandyien on
    reposig.jpg
  • Centipede DamascusCentipede Damascus Ho! Ho! Ho! Drink Coke!Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    I grew up with entirely the wrong kind of woods, apparently

    Centipede Damascus on
    bluesky/tumblr
    eZB497F.jpg
  • MugginsMuggins Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES

    Muggins on
    BdVvFJu.jpg
    hey satan...: thinkgeek amazon My post |
  • BigDesBigDes Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    There is frequently porn next to the kids playground in the park near me. Everytime you walk through you tread in discarded copies Swank, Razzle and er, Swazzle.

    BigDes on
    steam_sig.png
  • RankenphileRankenphile Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood.Registered User, Moderator Mod Emeritus
    edited July 2008
    Fandyien wrote: »
    The first porn I ever saw was a playboy anniversary edition someone left out in the rain on my street. I was 12, my friends and I biked past it. I picked up and thought it was an exercise magazine at first, since there was a lady dildoing herself with a giant purple dildo. I was all, "hmm, whats she doing? i wonder what that machine does? is that a vagina?"

    I then smuggled it into my house and kept it stashed for years. I have no idea where the pages I tore out and kept are now, though.
    the first time I ever saw porn, it was because these two neighborhood kids found a garbage bag stuffed full of porn

    they reached in and pulled out a wrinkled, torn-loose page with a photo of a naked woman on her knees in a pose that made her look like she was praying to a naked man with a half-erect penis in front of her

    I was sure that it had corrupted me

    Rankenphile on
    8406wWN.png
  • ChicoBlueChicoBlue Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    I found porn on the street in front of my house once.

    I kicked it over to my neighbour's yard, hoping that the little boys there would find it and man up, because they were home schooled and were little girls.

    ChicoBlue on
  • KilljoyKilljoy __BANNED USERS regular
    edited July 2008
    first time i saw porn was when i typed in sex.com

    next time was when i typed dragonmoonx

    Killjoy on
    [SIGPIC]http://forums.penny-arcade.com/image.php?type=sigpic&userid=23414&dateline=1249979470[/SIGPIC]
  • JohnHamJohnHam Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Um, yeah, I actually have. I was not aware this was common.

    JohnHam on
    signature.png

  • Wombat!!Wombat!! Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    I remember my friends and I were messing around on the computer, and we were like, lets try boring.com.

    It was for some guy, Richard Boring or something.

    "What about REALLYboring.com?"

    Pow

    Wombat!! on
  • CampionCampion Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    I have found mushrooms, which are fairly phallic.

    Campion on
    4484-7718-8470
  • Riggs BlitzkriegRiggs Blitzkrieg Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Fandyien wrote: »
    The first porn I ever saw was a playboy anniversary edition someone left out in the rain on my street. I was 12, my friends and I biked past it. I picked up and thought it was an exercise magazine at first, since there was a lady dildoing herself with a giant purple dildo. I was all, "hmm, whats she doing? i wonder what that machine does? is that a vagina?"

    I then smuggled it into my house and kept it stashed for years. I have no idea where the pages I tore out and kept are now, though.

    That wouldn't have been playboy. This story is fake. Why are you posting fake stories on the internet fandyien?

    Riggs Blitzkrieg on
  • FandyienFandyien But Otto, what about us? Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Riggs Blitzkrieg wrote: »
    Fandyien wrote: »
    The first porn I ever saw was a playboy anniversary edition someone left out in the rain on my street. I was 12, my friends and I biked past it. I picked up and thought it was an exercise magazine at first, since there was a lady dildoing herself with a giant purple dildo. I was all, "hmm, whats she doing? i wonder what that machine does? is that a vagina?"

    I then smuggled it into my house and kept it stashed for years. I have no idea where the pages I tore out and kept are now, though.

    That wouldn't have been playboy. This story is fake. Why are you posting fake stories on the internet fandyien?

    I'm only capable of lies

    Fandyien on
    reposig.jpg
  • RankenphileRankenphile Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood.Registered User, Moderator Mod Emeritus
    edited July 2008
    man, I can't even imagine trying to have the porno talk with my kids some day

    all trying to explain to them what a magazine is

    Rankenphile on
    8406wWN.png
  • DruhimDruhim Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited July 2008
    I sure as fucking hell did find porn in the woods as a kid

    Druhim on
    belruelotterav-1.jpg
  • bongibongi regular
    edited July 2008
    one time i went into the woods and found a tree

    bongi on
  • WeaverWeaver Breakfast Witch Hashus BrowniusRegistered User regular
    edited July 2008
    I found stuff in the woods when I was kid back in Texas. Couple of old magazines.

    Weaver on
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] new member
    edited July 2008
    The user and all related content has been deleted.

    [Deleted User] on
  • BigDesBigDes Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    I wonder if there is a porn fairy going around just littering the woods and parks in order to corrupt the youth of moment.

    BigDes on
    steam_sig.png
  • The GeekThe Geek Oh-Two Crew, Omeganaut Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited July 2008
    Rankenphile wrote: »
    man, I can't even imagine trying to have the porno talk with my kids some day

    all trying to explain to them what a magazine is

    Your kids will kind a Kindle with porn loaded on it out in the woods.

    The Geek on
    BLM - ACAB
  • StarcrossStarcross Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    I used to quite frequently find the sunday sport (a british paper, like the Sun if every page was page 3) in the woods. The pages were scattered apart by the wind so you'd pick up a page and by the time you'd finished looking at it, you'd have walked to the next one.

    Starcross on
  • DruhimDruhim Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited July 2008
    this is my fear, that as we become increasingly urbanized more and more young boys will miss out on the magical experience of finding their first porn in the woods and looking over it in their tree fort with their best friends while they drink budweiser they smuggled out of the fridge

    Druhim on
    belruelotterav-1.jpg
  • KrentzKrentz Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Haha yes I did. Found some nudie poker cards just strewn out there.

    Do people do that on purpose? Like when they are done, just toss them out in the woods? It's like returning them to the circle of life for some other kids to find.

    Krentz on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • bongibongi regular
    edited July 2008
    BigDes wrote: »
    I wonder if there is a porn fairy going around just littering the woods and parks in order to corrupt the youth of moment.
    his name is derrick and he's a kiddy fiddler

    bongi on
  • Donovan PuppyfuckerDonovan Puppyfucker A dagger in the dark is worth a thousand swords in the morningRegistered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Found a suitcase in the bush near a friends house once whilst playing glovegun wars. Open it up and whaddayaknow? Enough porn magazines (brand new, still in the wrappers) to supply a newsagents.

    Had a big bonfire that night, roasted apples and toasted marshmallows for all (also a porn magazine for each guy there).

    Donovan Puppyfucker on
  • BigDesBigDes Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    bongi wrote: »
    BigDes wrote: »
    I wonder if there is a porn fairy going around just littering the woods and parks in order to corrupt the youth of moment.
    his name is derrick and he's a kiddy fiddler

    Oh, this is somewhat less magical than I had hoped.

    BigDes on
    steam_sig.png
  • bongibongi regular
    edited July 2008
    BigDes wrote: »
    bongi wrote: »
    BigDes wrote: »
    I wonder if there is a porn fairy going around just littering the woods and parks in order to corrupt the youth of moment.
    his name is derrick and he's a kiddy fiddler

    Oh, this is somewhat less magical than I had hoped.
    that's what thomas said when he climbed into derrick's van, too

    bongi on
  • RankenphileRankenphile Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood.Registered User, Moderator Mod Emeritus
    edited July 2008
    this is hilarious

    I had no idea this was such a widespread phenomenon

    Rankenphile on
    8406wWN.png
  • DroolDrool Science! AustinRegistered User regular
    edited July 2008
    I found a picture of a vagina all spread open on the ground once. It was just the vagina, and it was weird because I was young and without context I couldn't tell exactly why it was so cool.

    Drool on
  • Riggs BlitzkriegRiggs Blitzkrieg Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    I live in the desert so we have no woods here. I did find porn in like back alleys and shit though

    Riggs Blitzkrieg on
  • BigDesBigDes Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    bongi wrote: »
    BigDes wrote: »
    bongi wrote: »
    BigDes wrote: »
    I wonder if there is a porn fairy going around just littering the woods and parks in order to corrupt the youth of moment.
    his name is derrick and he's a kiddy fiddler

    Oh, this is somewhat less magical than I had hoped.
    that's what thomas said when he climbed into derrick's van, too

    Strangers always have the best sweets.

    BigDes on
    steam_sig.png
  • JohnHamJohnHam Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Wait now that I think about it, I actually found a catalog, which advertised many other pornographic materials, and included some demonstrative pictures.

    So, I guess it was like, meta-porn?

    JohnHam on
    signature.png

Sign In or Register to comment.
Penny Arcade Forums› Social Entropy++