Girl Thread (Difficulty: Room mate!)

DVG

So this past Friday evening, after our party guests left and my female room mate and I decided we needed to do some shots and just chit chat about life. We started to make out and fool around.

This was a pretty awesome surprise, and the next day it didn't really seem awkward at all, though we've been running on somewhat opposite schedules the rest of the weekend and I haven't seen her more than a half hour or so.

Prior to this, both of us had other dating interests. I had an agreement to go on a date with another girl, though a specific date hadn't been set yet, and she had finally decided to move past her ex and had someone in mind. Then this happened.

So I guess what I'm trying to decide is should I potentially complicate our living situation by bringing up what happened and seeing if she'd be interested in exploring it past one drunken night, or if I should just keep the memory of hooking up with a girl who is way out of my league and go back to our respective separate lives.

I'm more or less set in making an attempt at talking to her tonight, unless someone has a compelling argument on why I shouldn't do just that

Sir Carcass

This has potential to be really awesome or really horrible, but it's impossible to predict. I would bring it up, because you never know unless you try. If she isn't going for it, just move on and try to forget it. Things will be awkward for a bit.

blah

Depends how much you like her to be honest. How long have you known her? Did you like her this much before you hooked up, or could your head still be up in the clouds from last Friday? If your answers to these questions aren't more than a few months and yes and no, then maybe sit back for a bit. She's not going anywhere soon

Otherwise. I'll assume you guys are already at least reasonably compatible since you're living together, so you're probably not in for any huge surprises. My suggestion if you do like her this much is to play it cool, you don't want to put too much pressure on the situation if it's not requited. I'm not sure what she's like, but some people can be easy going about hooking up with friends and such. Wait for some reliable vibes, and if you're getting them, go for it. Basically just don't assume shit from the go.

Oh, and is it possible you're the dude she has in mind?

Also, self esteem, she's not out of your league, no such thing!

JustinSane07

I would give it an attempt, like Carcass said. Mostly because if your schedules are really opposite, any awkardness would dissapate over time.

ceres

Maybe bring it up casually. Have a change-of-topic sentence worked out and ready to go if her response isn't quickly positive.

Like blah said, how did you feel about her before you hooked up? It's easy to think you could be falling for someone/there's something there in the afterglow of a good makeout.

cloudeagle

ceres wrote: »

Maybe bring it up casually. Have a change-of-topic sentence worked out and ready to go if her response isn't quickly positive.

Like blah said, how did you feel about her before you hooked up? It's easy to think you could be falling for someone/there's something there in the afterglow of a good makeout.

This, exactly. Being calm and casual is the best way to proceed in this (especially if alcohol was involved in the make-out), as well as figuring out how much you really like her beyond the physical bits.

Limp moose

I would tread lightly.

Every time I have drunkenly made out with a coworker or roommate things go one of two ways. We either continue to make out until one party moves on and wants to see other people. Then it stops and the other party is left feeling bummed but still has to see this person every day leading to bad feelings and awkwardness. Its not like she is going to move out so lets say you do get feelings for her and then she is banging some other dude across the hall. That would suck!

Or situation two. It was a for real drunken mistake one party already regrets it and instant awkwardness. Either way it will lead to awkwardness. I mean Best case scenario its not awkward at all and you guys start a meaningful and long term relationship off a one night drunken hook up... That probably isn't going to happen.

The possibility of this not working out and being awkward has to weighed against it working. So unless you think your chances are really good that she actually likes you and likes you so much she wants to date you and live with you at the same time. I would just chalk it up to drunkenness and leave it at that. If you guys party hard again and it happens again. Then hey maybe try something then.

While normally i am all about going for it and putting it out there that you like this girl. It all too often blows up in your face when its a roommate or coworker. Just don't shit where you eat so to speak when it comes to girls.