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so a man walks into a bar
Fandyien
But Otto, what about us? Registered User regular
But Otto, what about us? Registered User regular
so this guy walks into a bar and sees a sign that reads "ask the bartender how to get a free night of drinks"
so the guy asks the bartender what he has to do, to which the bartender replies
"well, first, you gotta yank the hurtin tooth out of a mean old bull dog outside. then, if you face ain't' been bit, you gotta give the oldest whore in town an orgasm in under ten minutes. you do all that, and it's as many drinks as you want for you and your friends tonight"
so the man rushes headlong out of the bar, and everyone inside waits with bated breath
six, seven, eight minutes pass...and the man runs back in, sweaty and bedraggled, and says "so where's the whore whose tooth i gotta pull?"
so the guy asks the bartender what he has to do, to which the bartender replies
"well, first, you gotta yank the hurtin tooth out of a mean old bull dog outside. then, if you face ain't' been bit, you gotta give the oldest whore in town an orgasm in under ten minutes. you do all that, and it's as many drinks as you want for you and your friends tonight"
so the man rushes headlong out of the bar, and everyone inside waits with bated breath
six, seven, eight minutes pass...and the man runs back in, sweaty and bedraggled, and says "so where's the whore whose tooth i gotta pull?"
he had sex with the dog. it was a hilarious misunderstanding.
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One day Mom bakes a chocolate cake. While she's not looking, Timmy gets his hands into the cake and rubs it all over his face. He says to Mom "Look Mommy, I'm Black!"
Mom slaps him, tells him "Don't you EVER behave like that again in this house! Now go tell your father what you just did."
So Timmy finds Dad and says "Look, Daddy, I'm black!"
Dad slaps him, tells him "Don't you say that to me, again! Go tell your Grandfather what you just did."
Timmy finds Grandpa, repeats the joke one last time, and is slapped yet again, and told to apologize to his mother and so he goes back to the kitchen.
Timmy says to his Mom, "I learned that I've been Black for five minutes, and I already hate you White people."
this is a thread to appreciate people who inadvertantly fuck dogs for alcohol everywhere.
that usually happens after the alcohol
a heh
heh
Medium and larger size dogs are almost always more passive. Especially compared to Chihuaha's, the yapping little fuckers.
some of them will even lick your hand if you offer them whole-grain cereals at twice the price or trickle down economic plans
holy crap
what happened
He brings it up to the register and the cashier rings it up and says, "That'll be $14.67."
The scruffy, redhead, green wearing, smelly guy pulls a jar of out of his pocket, opens it, dumps a pile of baby teeth on the counter and begins sorting through them.
The cashier is dumbfounded. After a few minutes of watching this scruffy, redhead, green wearing, smelly guy count up baby teeth she finally says, "Sir, you can't pay for this with baby teeth."
And the scruffy, redhead, green wearing, smelly guy starts crying and says, "OI'M OIRISH UND THAS AS WOT WE YOUZE FER COURANCY IN OIRLAND. PLAYS, OI NEAD THAS BAYBAY FOODE FER BAIT. OI'M SO VARY HONGRY!"
And that man was named FAQ.
he just sat there and enjoyed the warmth
i'd tap F
B seems like a good lay
check out the butt on that lowercase j
Roses are Red
I am Blue
Dog poop smells good
When compared to you.
G seems like she'd be exciting
look at those little nooks and crannies
alcoves, if you will
O is the most obvious choice.
A if I've had a few
hotdog down a hallway, man
just look at it
my arms holding Y's two "y" pieces against a wall as i hammer away from behind while Y looks over its shoulder at me huff puff
gay
and lowercase f, mmm, check out those curves