I'm gonna regret this, perhaps.

khristoph

K, here it be, i'll shut up and not get all defensive now. (first time posting anything btw, so apologies if it goes arse up). Thoughts anyone? G.

The Celestial

DA doesn't allow hot-linking. Nice try though.

Fixed:

khristoph

Thanks dude, see, i'm learning already. DA doesn't seem to do me any favours as it stands.

The Celestial

DA fosters an enviroment of....well, I'll not hijack the thread any further.

The main thing that sticks out to me is the folds on her(?) clothes. There are WAY too many folds they are all pretty much wrong. Throw a sheet over some large object in you room and stare at it for a while. Follow the flow of the lines as gravity does its thing.

Her upper right arm seems a bit too long. Or her forearm...I can't tell with the way the folds in the sleeve are.

edit: Both arms seem too long looking at it again.

Your lighting seems crazy inconsistant too. But I'm no expert in that field.

MagicToaster

I think the clothes are hiding alot of imperfections. The arms are crazy long and don't really connect properly to the torso.

Ape2001

The shadows and how the fabric is drawn at all make it look pretty much artifical, like some thick polyester.
That fold at her left knee, I don't get what's causing it, it's defintely not the knee itself.

Post more ^^' You're one of the few people that really come to get critism.

Tweaked_Bat_

As long as you post a serious attempt and are seriously looking to get crits on how to improve, then I don't think you'll have too much to regret

I don't think I said 'seriously' enough, so here it is few more times... seriously seriously seriously seriously seriously

:P

TimTheSloth

the left arm is crrraaaaaazzy long.

Tam

Both arms are way too long. Forget that pose, too; you know it's impossible with a sword that long.

khristoph

So essentially, I should be convincing my girlfriend to sit still long enough for me to throw a sheet over her and practise anatomy, though her freakishly long arms might mislead

hunterb

Tam wrote:

Forget that pose, too; you know it's impossible with a sword that long.

why? just turn the wrist so the sword is coming at us rather than straight down.

the shoulders seem to be a big problem, though. the right shoulder is raised a lot higher than the left to twist the arm like that. thats good, but you didnt turn the ribcage and reposition the neck/head to go along with it. right now it just looks like her arm is detached from her body.

the shoulders are also just too wide i think.

edit: quickie paintover. too lazy to redo the face or sword, but those are less anatomical corrections and more aesthetics.



the straight on view of her body was boring and didnt look right. it makes more sense and has a more interesting effect if you turn the body to see the arch of the back. i brought the shoulders in, slimmed down the arms, shortened the legs. generally just made her less bulky overall. really you should turn the head so its not straight on either.

khristoph

Thanks guys, specially hunterb, the paintover really helps. G.