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Online Dating

DrSammyDDrSammyD Registered User regular
edited December 2008 in Help / Advice Forum
Hey has anyone ever dated someone online. How far did it get. What happened, and if it ended, why? Not to be nosy I just need some sort of personal interview on online dating for a paper.

DrSammyD on

Posts

  • Kate of LokysKate of Lokys Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    I think about half the people who post on PA been involved in online relationships. In fact, the number of PA couples - people who met through this site - must be in the double digits at the very least. (Including me and Pixels).

    Are you looking for people who have used sites specifically intended for date-finding (like OKCupid, lavalife, etc), or are you talking more about people who have been in online relationships in general? If it's the latter, I'd be happy to contribute my input.

    Kate of Lokys on
  • Shorn Scrotum ManShorn Scrotum Man Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    I have.

    It sucks.

    I met my current girlfriend through an book discussion email list. I'm from Ohio, she's from South Africa. After many years of just being friends we took the plunge, but for over a year we were boyfriend/girlfriend online, without ever having met in real life. It sucks not being able to be with someone you care alot about.

    Now she's moved to the US for school and we have an apartment together so it's all good. But that first part sucks. ALOT.

    Shorn Scrotum Man on
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  • DrSammyDDrSammyD Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    No, anybody who has ever met online and dated for a while should be perfect. I'm kind of wondering sort of how the relationship progressed in terms of this model.

    knapp.jpg

    how did you get from each stage, and how long did it take sort of thing.

    DrSammyD on
  • Shorn Scrotum ManShorn Scrotum Man Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    *EDIT* Nevermind, apparently you were replying to Kate.

    Could you explain a little more what that chart is supposed to mean?

    Shorn Scrotum Man on
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  • Kate of LokysKate of Lokys Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    If you wanted to do an actual interview - as in, you PM or IM me prepared questions, and I answer them - I'd be cool with that. But I'm not going to sit down and spend an hour writing you an essay describing my relationship in terms of an arbitrary model I've never seen before :P

    Kate of Lokys on
  • Shorn Scrotum ManShorn Scrotum Man Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    Yeah, that's pretty much how I feel about it to. If you'd like to do an interview, that'd be cool. I've got to much other shit going on to try and figure out what you want from us.

    Shorn Scrotum Man on
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  • DrSammyDDrSammyD Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    edit: yeah sorry bout that, I just sort of needed an online reference for this so that I can point to the conversation in a citation.

    actually, just screw the model could you just say how you got together, and a few of the key decisions that made you come closer together?

    you already did that shorn, and I've already used you in my paper.

    DrSammyD on
  • Shorn Scrotum ManShorn Scrotum Man Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    How is your model reflect anything different than what a normal, met in real life relationship goes through?

    Shorn Scrotum Man on
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  • DrSammyDDrSammyD Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    it doesn't, it's just a model that explains the way that relationships always go. I'm just doing my paper on online relationships

    DrSammyD on
  • Kate of LokysKate of Lokys Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    This is some pretty half-assed research, and I sincerely hope you'll actually use the correct citation form (including a link to the thread) so your prof can come here and see you trying to prompt people to describe things in your words instead of in their own. This wasn't any sort of interview, it was "oh hey I need to be able to reference an online conversation, quick say something about your online relationship."

    Of course, you'll probably describe this as "personal communication," even though it was nothing of the sort, and your prof will be none the wiser.

    Kate of Lokys on
  • DavoidDavoid Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    I don't really see how the model can be applied differently whether you met through a forum or in school or whatever.

    Davoid on
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  • EmanonEmanon __BANNED USERS regular
    edited December 2008
    Are we talking online dating where you meet or don't meet? If you don't meet then it sounds lame.

    Other than that match.com is awesome, that's where I met my ladyfriend.

    Emanon on
    Treats Animals Right!
  • mellestadmellestad Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    I mainly used match.com, but a couple others as well....but match.com was the best.

    Let's see....

    Dated 5 girls.

    3 of them were great.

    2 sucked.

    I almost dated one more, and I think she would have been great too, but I met my wife on the same site a couple days before we went out.

    So match.com=5 dates, 1 wife and now 1 kid. Good luck :)

    mellestad on
  • DjiemDjiem Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    mellestad wrote: »
    2 sucked.

    Wouldn't that also make them great?

    See what I did there?

    Djiem on
  • mellestadmellestad Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    I actually went back and read what you asked, imagine that!

    So we met and chatted online, sent emails and stuff for a couple days, then talked on the phone. Lots of question and answer stuff, finding out our personalities, likes, dislikes, stuff like that. It was like we did dates 1-3 online I would say. After about a week and a half I drove to her town (just an hour away) and we did dinner and a movie. By that time we actually had a good idea of who the other person was, so it was a lot more natural than a blind date....we already knew we had a lot in common, and it was very relaxed.

    After that I drove up at least 2-3 times a week and did all the usual date stuff. Rather quickly (I won't say how quickly, she might be embarrassed) she succumbed to my animal sexuality :winky: and I started staying at her place on weekends, plus a couple nights a week (geeze, I was always so tired!).

    A few months after that, she moved from her town to my town, we lived together for a few months then I proposed. Got married in another few months, had a kid about a year later.

    Your diagram confuses and frightens me, so I don't have much to say about it. If you have specific questions, please ask.

    mellestad on
  • radroadkillradroadkill MDRegistered User regular
    edited December 2008
    I've been in both types of online relationships: there was the ex, who I'm still great friends with, where it was mostly online except for my visiting Chicago (I used to live in Fl) once and things ending up falling aparts a few months later. We met on FURCADIA. If that's not lame, I'm not sure what is.

    Then, of course, Quid. I found him on OKC and started talking to him about a band; he came to visit a few months later (he lived two hours way) and we dated for a while; we broke up. We got in contact again almost a year later and talked when he was in Iraq; we then dated and saw each other every weekend when he got back and now we're married.

    So... uh... yeah. There's a lot to get into. If you want to PM questions or something I'm more than willing to answer in greater detail.

    radroadkill on
  • KyleWPetersonKyleWPeterson Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    It's going to depend on what you value, really. If you're looking for a relationship where you can actually spend some face time together, watch a movie while snuggling, or sleep with someone you care about, on-line is definitely not the way to go.

    KyleWPeterson on
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