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Life Lessons from a Convention(Ladies)
Darth Waiter
Elrond HubbardMordor XenuRegistered User regular
Elrond HubbardMordor XenuRegistered User regular
Last night, I ran into John Steakley. Again.
If you don't know who he is, I will refer you to a couple of books; one is called 'Armor' and it's a brilliant sci-fi story about Post-Traumatic-Stress-Disorder and how people are fragile, even in space. The other one was called 'Vampires' and John Carpenter made a movie about it; if you've seen the movie, you've read the introduction and that's all. The book itself is much more complex and dire than the movie. I also got to meet the real life inspiration for Jack Crow. So they're both pretty badass.
You see, about four years ago, I met him for the first time when I was waiting tables at a four star restaurant here in Dallas. He was having a grand time last night and that same night four years ago. Small difference: the man had a stroke. He couldn't remember a lot of things, like, people's names, phone numbers, what he did last year for the holidays, simple stuff and not so simple stuff.
But he remembered me. He remembered me enough to chew me a new one.
"Why aren't you published yet?"
"Where's that pretty girl you were with the last time I saw you?"
"What the hell, son?"
What the hell indeed, John.
After a brief thirty minute conversation, we both realized that it was pretty goddamned late and we both needed sleep. I bid him goodnight and he bid me, "Boy, if you aren't published in the next year, I'm coming for you."
Yes, sir. Loud and clear.
And now, here I am, imparting the wisdom of a hard-drinking author to you:
-Get published; it's better than heroin.
-Love your woman; there may be more fish in the sea, but it takes a stupid man to not appreciate the one you have.
-Love life; you get one shot.
-Johnny Cash was brilliant.
-Vietnam sucked balls; the war in Iraq and Afghanistan is even worse.
-Politicians can go fuck themselves but that Obama guy is alright.
There was more, but we were both pretty fucking drunk.
So, tell me, Social Entropists, what is your wisdom? What gets you up on a Sunday and makes you tick?
If you don't know who he is, I will refer you to a couple of books; one is called 'Armor' and it's a brilliant sci-fi story about Post-Traumatic-Stress-Disorder and how people are fragile, even in space. The other one was called 'Vampires' and John Carpenter made a movie about it; if you've seen the movie, you've read the introduction and that's all. The book itself is much more complex and dire than the movie. I also got to meet the real life inspiration for Jack Crow. So they're both pretty badass.
You see, about four years ago, I met him for the first time when I was waiting tables at a four star restaurant here in Dallas. He was having a grand time last night and that same night four years ago. Small difference: the man had a stroke. He couldn't remember a lot of things, like, people's names, phone numbers, what he did last year for the holidays, simple stuff and not so simple stuff.
But he remembered me. He remembered me enough to chew me a new one.
"Why aren't you published yet?"
"Where's that pretty girl you were with the last time I saw you?"
"What the hell, son?"
What the hell indeed, John.
After a brief thirty minute conversation, we both realized that it was pretty goddamned late and we both needed sleep. I bid him goodnight and he bid me, "Boy, if you aren't published in the next year, I'm coming for you."
Yes, sir. Loud and clear.
And now, here I am, imparting the wisdom of a hard-drinking author to you:
-Get published; it's better than heroin.
-Love your woman; there may be more fish in the sea, but it takes a stupid man to not appreciate the one you have.
-Love life; you get one shot.
-Johnny Cash was brilliant.
-Vietnam sucked balls; the war in Iraq and Afghanistan is even worse.
-Politicians can go fuck themselves but that Obama guy is alright.
There was more, but we were both pretty fucking drunk.
So, tell me, Social Entropists, what is your wisdom? What gets you up on a Sunday and makes you tick?
Darth Waiter on
0
Posts
nothing gets me up on sundays
(sane) people generally rationalize their behavior so they dont actually think they are doing bad things
it isn't a convention of ladies at all.
Less weed.
other than "terrorists are bad", we don't really have any moralistic backing
edit: this was a terrible idea
I
what
I'm not really sure what that was about
It's like there's some noise coming out of your mouth, but I can't make it out over the dick.
there is a point to be made about the fact that in vietnam we were fighting another countries army
as opposed to fighting basically civilians (with attitude!)
And at least you aren't that guy.
my post
those are some true words he spoke
everything could always be worse with a headache!
Rank edit: I know, right?!?
so
uh
whatever
yes i know that civilians were involved in bombing stuff in Nam, but we went in under the pretenses of fighting an actual army, whereas in iraq we are not fighting their army at all anymore
Since I haven't sent you pictures of my penis yet, this thread should be right up your alley.
remember when you told me this and I asked, quite innocently, if you could ask him for an autograph for me and then i realised and was like
Like if he was not crippled and everything would he rule the world with an iron fist?
we went in under completely different pretenses and have turned iraq into a hellhole, no its not even close to the same, so no?
Well I'd hope I would be really clever if I were half robot too
good point, not like he can do anything but sit around and think
he could double as a coat-rack though
I bet he'd be banging every female physicist in sight.