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I'm muckin' facaques, man

ZombiemamboZombiemambo Registered User regular
edited February 2009 in Social Entropy++
A macaque is a kind of monkey. What kind of monkey, you ask? A monkey that's a huge asshole. Seriously, macaques are like the biggest douchebags of the animal kingdom.

Animal Planet has been gracious enough to provide us with more insight into their world of shitcockery in Dark Days in Monkey City. But that's not really what this thread is about, it's about how fuckin' mean macaques are.

My brother is a zoologist and worked with macaques for a bit. On top of being dickbutts, they're wicked smart. For example, when they had to sedate one to take it to the veterinarian (via rifle), the macaque dodged the fucking dart. Reportedly they've grabbed a few darts and thrown them back at the zoo keepers.

Fucking macaques. I bet they like to wear polos.

JKKaAGp.png
Zombiemambo on
«134

Posts

  • TossrockTossrock too weird to live too rare to dieRegistered User regular
    edited February 2009
    I dunno, compared to that monkey that ate a lady's face off, macaques don't seem so bad

    Tossrock on
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  • NadsNads Bob Ducca Asleep in a cul-de-sac.Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited February 2009
    Macaques fucking rule. Second only to sharks.

    Nads on
    3c5d24e9-b7f2-44ba-bbf2-3b4658af70bd.jpg
  • Synthetic OrangeSynthetic Orange Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    An ape ate that lady's face.

    Synthetic Orange on
  • potatoepotatoe Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    all macaques are cumming?

    potatoe on
  • DoobhDoobh She/Her, Ace Pan/Bisexual 8-) What's up, bootlickers?Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    I once armed my dwarves in Dwarf Fortress with crossbow to fight off the macaque menace.

    Doobh on
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  • ZombiemamboZombiemambo Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Oh, and apparently they've gotten close to picking a couple of locks, too. And if a macaque bites you, you're at risk for Herpes B Virus, which apparently most doctors are completely unaware of.

    Zombiemambo on
    JKKaAGp.png
  • TossrockTossrock too weird to live too rare to dieRegistered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Synthetic Orange wrote: »
    An ape ate that lady's face.

    technicalities

    Tossrock on
    sig.png
  • BroloBrolo Broseidon Lord of the BroceanRegistered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Synthetic Orange wrote: »
    An ape ate that lady's face.

    apes are the dirtiest monkies of them all

    Brolo on
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  • LarlarLarlar consecutive normal brunches Moderator, ClubPA Mod Emeritus
    edited February 2009
    Sean Penn must be a macaque.

    Larlar on
    iwantanswers3.png
  • NadsNads Bob Ducca Asleep in a cul-de-sac.Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited February 2009
    Look, it's either gonna be a monkey or a hooker, but either way I'm getting herpes.

    Nads on
    3c5d24e9-b7f2-44ba-bbf2-3b4658af70bd.jpg
  • FutoreFutore Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    howler monkeys can be heard through a mile of jungle

    Futore on
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  • potatoepotatoe Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    'or'?

    potatoe on
  • TossrockTossrock too weird to live too rare to dieRegistered User regular
    edited February 2009
    monkey hooker

    two birds, one night of profound regrets

    Tossrock on
    sig.png
  • NadsNads Bob Ducca Asleep in a cul-de-sac.Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited February 2009
    potatoe wrote: »
    'or'?

    In these economic times, I don't have the scrilla to get the deluxe package.

    Nads on
    3c5d24e9-b7f2-44ba-bbf2-3b4658af70bd.jpg
  • Grey GhostGrey Ghost Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    what in the world is Dark Days in Monkey City?

    Grey Ghost on
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  • BroloBrolo Broseidon Lord of the BroceanRegistered User regular
    edited February 2009
    HOT BONOBO ACTION

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=amFdmB_t-DY

    Brolo on
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  • ZombiemamboZombiemambo Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    you ever heard of that chimp named Frodo? he looks like he's taken a lot of steroids

    he threw a baby chimpanzee out of a tree just for fun

    what a dick

    Zombiemambo on
    JKKaAGp.png
  • Darth WaiterDarth Waiter Elrond Hubbard Mordor XenuRegistered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Suck macaque.

    Darth Waiter on
  • KetBraKetBra Dressed Ridiculously Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Macaque the Knife.

    KetBra on
    KGMvDLc.jpg?1
  • MysstMysst King Monkey of Hedonism IslandRegistered User regular
    edited February 2009
    all monkeys are awesome and you are the one that is dumb

    Mysst on
    ikbUJdU.jpg
  • HunterHunter Chemist with a heart of Au Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Bears own monkeys, it's science

    Hunter on
    Sammy_11Feb2012-2.jpgSammy_bath2_Feb2012-1.jpg
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  • NadsNads Bob Ducca Asleep in a cul-de-sac.Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited February 2009
    Smacaque my bitch up.

    Nads on
    3c5d24e9-b7f2-44ba-bbf2-3b4658af70bd.jpg
  • NewtronNewtron Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    suck macaque

    edit: fuck bein beat

    Newtron on
  • potatoepotatoe Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Newtron wrote: »
    suck macaque

    5 posts late kiddo

    potatoe on
  • WeaverWeaver Breakfast Witch Hashus BrowniusRegistered User regular
    edited February 2009
    This is a pretty lame thread.

    Weaver on
  • HunterHunter Chemist with a heart of Au Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Fuck macaques, I climb buoys muthafucka

    Hunter on
    Sammy_11Feb2012-2.jpgSammy_bath2_Feb2012-1.jpg
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  • #pipe#pipe Cocky Stride, Musky odours Pope of Chili TownRegistered User regular
    edited February 2009
    2 pages of an SE thread about animals and no pictures yet?

    FOR SHAME

    look at these guys. Don't you just wanna hang out in the hot tub with these guys and eat cookies?

    Japanese+Macaque+Monkeys+Relax+Hot+Springs+JLoDCv8qWdWl.jpg

    #pipe on
    JvTDS.png
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  • NadsNads Bob Ducca Asleep in a cul-de-sac.Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited February 2009
    More than anything, Pipe, more than anything.

    Nads on
    3c5d24e9-b7f2-44ba-bbf2-3b4658af70bd.jpg
  • #pipe#pipe Cocky Stride, Musky odours Pope of Chili TownRegistered User regular
    edited February 2009
    THIS ONE LOVES THIS PIGEON!

    cni_macaque_070914_ssh.jpg

    AWWWWW

    #pipe on
    JvTDS.png
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  • HunterHunter Chemist with a heart of Au Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Some are evil though
    evil-monkey.jpg

    Hunter on
    Sammy_11Feb2012-2.jpgSammy_bath2_Feb2012-1.jpg
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  • #pipe#pipe Cocky Stride, Musky odours Pope of Chili TownRegistered User regular
    edited February 2009
    this guy looks like something out of the Ren and Stimpy show

    Black-Macaque-HB1.jpg

    #pipe on
    JvTDS.png
    Need some stuff designed or printed? I can help with that.
  • NewtronNewtron Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    what're those big eye monkeys? the ones that live in austrailia or maybe the phillipines.

    Gorillas are pretty cool to.

    Newtron on
  • NadsNads Bob Ducca Asleep in a cul-de-sac.Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited February 2009
    Holy shit, what if you woke up in the middle of the night and he was just sitting on your chest, staring at you like that.

    Nads on
    3c5d24e9-b7f2-44ba-bbf2-3b4658af70bd.jpg
  • TheidarTheidar Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Macques have B virus in their saliva, this is often fatal to humans if not treated immediately.

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  • HunterHunter Chemist with a heart of Au Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Theidar wrote: »
    Macques have B virus in their saliva, this is often fatal to humans if not treated immediately.

    As long as they don't have the T virus that turns you into a zombie, you'll be fine

    Hunter on
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  • NewtronNewtron Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Nads wrote: »
    Holy shit, what if you woke up in the middle of the night and he was just sitting on your chest, staring at you like that.

    "sup dawg. get some IHOP?"

    Newtron on
  • NadsNads Bob Ducca Asleep in a cul-de-sac.Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited February 2009
    Like, what would you do? He just sits there, staring.

    Nads on
    3c5d24e9-b7f2-44ba-bbf2-3b4658af70bd.jpg
  • Rear Admiral ChocoRear Admiral Choco I wanna be an owl, Jerry! Owl York CityRegistered User regular
    edited February 2009
    There's no wrong way to eat a Rhesus.

    Rear Admiral Choco on
  • MysstMysst King Monkey of Hedonism IslandRegistered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Hunter wrote: »
    Bears own monkeys, it's science
    if it can be ridden, it has been dominated.

    monkeys ride bears.

    DOMINATED

    Mysst on
    ikbUJdU.jpg
  • potatoepotatoe Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Chocobo%20riding%20a%20monkey.png

    potatoe on
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