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I need some [LIFE] advice.

F87F87 So Say We AllRegistered User regular
edited August 2018 in Help / Advice Forum
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F87 on

Posts

  • SlagmireSlagmire Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    First things first, how old are you? I would say depending on that would help a lot of people with their answer.

    Slagmire on
  • LailLail Surrey, B.C.Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Move back home and get your shit together.

    Yes, living with parents is lame. But it's free (or...less expensive). Move home, get your portfolio together. Get a crappy part time job and save up some cash. Your poor work ethic needs to change if you ever want to go anywhere in life.

    Lail on
  • CorvusCorvus . VancouverRegistered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Whatever you decide to to do, you aren't going to go anywhere, with a job or with your art if you don't develop a better work ethic. I'd say move home, get your shit together and ask your parents and anyone you know with a successful career for advice on how to stick with a job.

    Corvus on
    :so_raven:
  • F87F87 So Say We All Registered User regular
    edited August 2018
    snip

    F87 on
  • QuidQuid Definitely not a banana Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Are you unable to find a job or internship that involves art?

    Quid on
  • Casually HardcoreCasually Hardcore Once an Asshole. Trying to be better. Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Depending on your location, the best thing to do in this economy is to gather up and hunker down. Like a herd of sheep in a blizzard. One sheep, alone, will die. Many sheep, lending and taking warmth, survives. So talk with your parents and tell them what's going on.

    Find a job and stick with it. You dont have to like your job, you just need to do your job.

    Casually Hardcore on
  • F87F87 So Say We All Registered User regular
    edited August 2018
    snip

    F87 on
  • PeregrineFalconPeregrineFalcon Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Lail wrote: »
    Move back home and get your shit together.

    Yes, living with parents is lame. But it's free (or...less expensive). Move home, get your portfolio together. Get a crappy part time job and save up some cash. Your poor work ethic needs to change if you ever want to go anywhere in life.

    Bam.

    Also, try to kick the drinking and smoking. The former won't help solve your problems (which it sounds like you're doing, with the "drink it away" line) and the latter sucks up money (which you don't have) at a ridiculous pace, and is unhealthy to boot.

    PeregrineFalcon on
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  • CorvusCorvus . VancouverRegistered User regular
    edited March 2009
    F87 wrote: »
    Ah yes, I guess that is important to mention. You see, I live in Oklahoma, and well, there are very little art opportunities here!

    If only I knew how someone actaully gets an internship. I guess it would need to be a paid one, but even at minimum wage that would be a dream come true.

    I haven't made much progress in my life over the last few years. It's a very strange feeling, and I kind of feel disconnected. Also, when all of this starts to bear down and I can't drink it away, I simply cannot justify working, drawing, or anything. I just feel like, "What's the point?"

    Well, you've got larger issues here. Like depression, perhaps. You should get that checked out.

    Corvus on
    :so_raven:
  • Cyd CycloneCyd Cyclone Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Here's some advice for your work ethic problem:

    Go get a job. Keep that job. Yes, that job will suck, but the truth is that all jobs suck in some way. Work as much as you can, and save money for emergencies, such as unemployment, in the future. Work on your art in your spare time.

    Basically, don't think that your future is going to fall in your lap without any work on your part. You're only 21. You're going to have to come to terms that you'll have to work jobs you hate, and do things you don't want to because that's what being an adult is all about. In the future, if you can't afford to quit the job you hate, you find a new one first, then quit.

    And as far as surviving off your art, I have a traditional artist friend (canvas landscapes, that sort of thing), who's really quite good, who only quit his 9-5 job last year to live off his art, and that's only because he's got a wealthy spouse.

    Really, just buckle down, get a job, and keep at it. There's not much else to it, and there's no magic way to 'fix your work ethic' besides working.

    Cyd Cyclone on
  • LewishamLewisham Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Aside from possible depression, your question boils down to:

    Should I move back with my parents, seeing as I am incapable of keeping a job?

    If you ask yourself the question "how will I support myself if I don't go home?" you're going to get your answer very quickly.

    Lewisham on
  • desperaterobotsdesperaterobots perth, ausRegistered User regular
    edited March 2009
    It may depend on what you're intending to become, but generally speaking, being an artist is expensive. I work a full time job that I dislike so I can have money to pay for rent/bills/luxuries, but it also supports my art.

    I paint in my spare time. So that means, if I work from 11.30am til 8pm, I come home and paint from 9pm til 2am. It's been like that since about March last year when I told myself I'd have a solo exhibition. The need to work has never let up since. My first exhibition cost at least a grand to put together, not counting the supplies to actually create the work, which would have cost a few grand at least.

    But a full time job I dislike means I have the freedom to devote myself fully to a hobby. A hobby which is slowly turning in to my second full time job, because people keep buying my art and keep inviting me to be in shows.

    If you have no work ethic, you won't be able to capitalise on the opportunities that arise from your art.

    It probably helps that I don't have much help from the family. There's no home for me to move back to if I get lazy. There's no hand outs for things I don't pay myself. So if I don't do things I dislike, no one is going to nod and say they understand; i'll just wind up homeless. Having said that, before my family disintegrated completely, I moved back in with my mother for a few months last year. This is after supporting myself for 5 years or so - i just couldn't find anywhere to rent that I could afford.

    Lay down some ground rules beforehand. ie I'm an adult and I'd like the freedom to decide when I wake up, when I sleep, who I see, where I go and at what time, when I eat and at what time of the day I take out the trash, and in all of this I owe you zero explanation but I might offer one if I want to. Worked for me. :P

    Just get a job. A shitty job. Any job. They take a few months before they become an acute, fresh nightmare to more of a dream-like repetitive awfulness. You have to push through the mediocre to get to any place good. It's the same when you're learning your craft. If you say 'fuck it' there, you will never get anywhere in art. If you say 'fuck it' to supporting yourself, you'll never get anywhere in art either.

    Woops big post. tl;dr: Going back to your parents might not be so bad, but art is expensive and needs a good work ethic so you have to develop one or you'll wallow in failure forever and squander whatever potential you might have!

    desperaterobots on
  • Inquisitor77Inquisitor77 2 x Penny Arcade Fight Club Champion A fixed point in space and timeRegistered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Life requires work. If you want to be an artist, you'll have to spend hours of almost every day doing it, just like if you want to be an engineer you have to spend hours studying and doing it. And yeah, art is one of those things that requires you to have an "actual" job to support, until you find yourself able to sell your art at a reasonable enough price to make a living at it. Also, you'll be spending a lot of time doing stuff like finding galleries, talking to gallery owners, promoting your art, trying to find a viable business plan, figuring out your finances/contracts, etc. etc. etc. that aren't directly related to actually making the art but are necessary for support if you are really serious about doing it as as living.

    Inquisitor77 on
  • LewieP's MummyLewieP's Mummy Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Lay down some ground rules beforehand. ie I'm an adult and I'd like the freedom to decide when I wake up, when I sleep, who I see, where I go and at what time, when I eat and at what time of the day I take out the trash, and in all of this I owe you zero explanation but I might offer one if I want to. Worked for me. :P

    Wouldn't work in my house - live with me: you have responsibilities. I don't run a hotel, I run my home, and all the people who live in it have responsibilities they have to meet. Yes, I have my 23 year old daughter and her 24 year old BF living with me while they save up for their first home. They pay rent , take turns to cook, and do other chores. They think its fair, too.

    If you move back home, (which sounds a much better deal than selling your plasma) you should expect to play an active part in your family's life, otherwise you're just sponging. Ditch the cigs and booze, you don't need either, and that in itself will save you loads of money. Get a job. Any job, and make yourself go out to work, even if its boring, it will pay. Practice your art, its not an easy career choice, specially today, but stick with it, in your spare time.

    LewieP's Mummy on
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  • GoodOmensGoodOmens Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    F87, you need to think about what you have to offer. What sort of education do you have? What degree (if any) do you have? What job skills do you have other than your art? With all due respect, you haven't given people much to work with here. What I have gathered from people who make art is this: you are very, VERY unlikely to make a living by creating art. Even more notably in the current economic situation. You have to have a very rare combination of skill, dedication and luck. You've already told us you lack at least one of those.

    Based on what you've told us, your work experience consists of two jobs, both of which you've quit for minor reasons. Quitting because of a 10 hours shift is not something that you can do. That's not much to recommend you to an employer. Do you have marketable skills? Customer service experience (other than Subway), computer skills? Can you do physical labor?

    Based on what you've told us, the best course of action seems simple...move back home, but not to focus on art, at least not entirely. Your primary focus should be finding a job, and sticking with it. That means identifying your skills and experience, creating a resume, and spending several hours a day job seeking. Check want ads, set up an account at monster.com, send out resumes. If you've been to college, find out if they have a job placement service (most do), which should help alot.

    Once you have a job, organize a rent schedule with your parents. Living at home for free (for anything other than a short time with a determined end point) is NOT a good way to develop any sense of self-worth or a work ethic. Work with them to determine a rent that is mutually satisfactory, it doesn't have to be as much as an apartment would be. Maybe $500 a month, and a quarter of the food bill.

    Then you can start to focus on improving your art. I know it sucks, and I'm giving you advice as someone that never considered a job as an artist. But the economy sucks right now, and it's getting worse. You need to start out by getting a job, any job, and dealing with the fact that you might be unhappy for a while.

    GoodOmens on
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  • desperaterobotsdesperaterobots perth, ausRegistered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Lay down some ground rules beforehand. ie I'm an adult and I'd like the freedom to decide when I wake up, when I sleep, who I see, where I go and at what time, when I eat and at what time of the day I take out the trash, and in all of this I owe you zero explanation but I might offer one if I want to. Worked for me. :P

    Wouldn't work in my house - live with me: you have responsibilities. I don't run a hotel, I run my home, and all the people who live in it have responsibilities they have to meet. Yes, I have my 23 year old daughter and her 24 year old BF living with me while they save up for their first home. They pay rent , take turns to cook, and do other chores. They think its fair, too.

    If you move back home, (which sounds a much better deal than selling your plasma) you should expect to play an active part in your family's life, otherwise you're just sponging. Ditch the cigs and booze, you don't need either, and that in itself will save you loads of money. Get a job. Any job, and make yourself go out to work, even if its boring, it will pay. Practice your art, its not an easy career choice, specially today, but stick with it, in your spare time.

    I think you took what I said the wrong way. You're right, of course. He needs to contribute. The ground rules I was mentioning needed to be laid down and agreed to by both parties before he moved back home, otherwise it wouldn't work.

    My parents were selling their house at the time (divorce), so aside from working my full time job, and working on my art in my spare time, I was cleaning the house (had to be spotless for open house every weekend), walking and feeding the dog, cooking the odd dinner, doing my laundry, washing the dishes and paying board.

    If my mum had started to ask where I was going/when I would be home/what I was doing, I would have exploded after 5 years of doing what I liked, when I liked, without having to answer to anyone.

    desperaterobots on
  • GuffreyGuffrey Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    First of all, donating plasma is great, and yeah, you get money, but I just don't see that as a viable long term source of income. No offense, but it just seems like rather than get a job, you'd prefer to sit in the chair and get juice and cookies afterwards. Of course someone correct me if I'm wrong and it is in fact a viable long term way to do things.

    I'd say the biggest problem is your work ethic, as others have said. I am just under 21 years old, married, living in Oklahoma. Granted, I don't have the most terrible job ever. Is it what I want to do for a career? No. And yeah, sometimes its really a drag to go in for a ten hour shift, when its not the job I want to build my family on. My wife doesn't like her job at all, but can't move on till she gets her degree. But every day we both get up, go to work, and make the best of it.

    Now, I'm not trying to make us look like amazing people or anything, but my point is your work ethic is key. Pursue art as best you can. But while you are doing that, prepare to work some really crappy jobs to support yourself. And for the record, my vote is to move home and get your ducks in a row.

    Edit: Let me preface this by saying this job would require a great deal of work ethic. But before I got my current job, I was working part time at Home Depot on freight team. Mon-Fri, 8pm-12am. I started at $10 an hour, three months in you get a raise to $10.50. Now, let me tell you I didn't "enjoy" the job at all. Loved the people I worked with, hated the job. You will sweat, you will be sore. But it is great money, and leaves your schedule wide open.

    Guffrey on
  • voodoosporkvoodoospork Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Don't put off seeing a doctor either. You don't want to drift from fuckup to fuckup for 5 years just to find out all you needed was some welbutrin or lithium.

    voodoospork on
  • Blake TBlake T Do you have enemies then? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Fuck the transition to getting another job stop being a pussy and go out there and get full time work.

    I mean sure your parents are going to support you if you ask for it, they're your parents. But that doesn't mean you should take advantage of them because you are so goddam lazy.

    Quitting mazzios for the assine reason that it was boring is just balls out stupid if you don't have more work and there are bills to pay.

    Freelancing is hard work. Once you decide you want to freelance you don't just yell it into the heavens and work comes towards you, you need to put effort into getting your name out there. Once you are established it can be your sole source of income. Starting out I garuntee you it will not.

    You firstly need to grow up a lot I would say.

    Blake T on
  • Cowboy BebopCowboy Bebop Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    F87 wrote: »
    Ah yes, I guess that is important to mention. You see, I live in Oklahoma, and well, there are very little art opportunities here!

    If you want to do freelance art work then really the best place to be is on the net,so location really shouldn't be an issue. As for the other stuff I'm on the same boat, but when it gets to the point when you can't pay the rent then it becomes a lot harder than any job.

    Cowboy Bebop on
  • noir_bloodnoir_blood Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    How about you grow up and stop being the stereotypical 'artist' douchebag?

    Waaah, I don't have enough time for my art if I have a job. There's tons of people out there that 'made' it in their chosen field, while at the same time holding down a job. You shouldn't be any different.

    In this economic times, you should be thankful you can still get hired, rather than quitting jobs because you get bored of them.

    To the question at hand, yes, go back to your parents house and seriously think about this problem of yours. What if you're not good enough in the art department? What are you going to do then?

    noir_blood on
  • DarwinsFavoriteTortoiseDarwinsFavoriteTortoise Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    noir_blood wrote: »
    How about you grow up and stop being the stereotypical 'artist' douchebag?

    Waaah, I don't have enough time for my art if I have a job. There's tons of people out there that 'made' it in their chosen field, while at the same time holding down a job. You shouldn't be any different.

    In this economic times, you should be thankful you can still get hired, rather than quitting jobs because you get bored of them.

    To the question at hand, yes, go back to your parents house and seriously think about this problem of yours. What if you're not good enough in the art department? What are you going to do then?


    Seriously.

    Learn that you will have jobs that are not pleasant. Accept that and get over it.

    DarwinsFavoriteTortoise on
  • NotYouNotYou Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Everyone thinks they can just start freelancing and get money. Freelancing is incredibly hard unless you're a well known artist, or can afford to undercut all of your competition by living in India. You art has to be freaking jaw dropping fantastic, regardless of what field you're making art for.

    Someone who doesnt have the drive to handle a simple menial job, probably doesnt have the drive to ever get their art to a professional level.

    You should either A: get your ass in gear, go get a job, and then spend all your spare time doing art, or B: go beg your parents to let you live with them forever.

    NotYou on
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