Would like some feedback on my strip

Dee

Hello all!

My name is Doryan Algarra and I have been doing my online comic strip for a little while now and I wanted to hear any constructive feedback on it that you guys might have.

My online comic is not really a plot driven one with a story or recurring characters, its more of a "Far Side" type strip.

You can find it here: http://www.substandardscompliant.com/

Thanks in advance to anyone who responds.

NibCrom

Post a comic here. Just linking to your site is whoring and against the rules.

Edit: Thank you.

earthwormadam

Yeah man. Follow the rules. It's cool to follow the rules.

But anyway, I found that the strips were pretty hit or miss for me, but sadly mostly miss. The first one that I found to be slightly funny was the jello one. Simple, but chuckle worthy.

Also, I would seriously consider putting your text on the bottom of the comic because often times I would read the panel and be like ???. Only after that would I realize that there was a caption. It looks more like a title on top of the comic than a caption.

Your linework is pretty good in spots, but you might want to save your images at a slightly higher resolution because they get a little pixely in spots.

Dee

Sorry about that guys, I don't post on alot of forums, I guess it shows - here are some of my strips...

Willeth

earthwormadam wrote: »

Yeah man. Follow the rules. It's cool to follow the rules.

But anyway, I found that the strips were pretty hit or miss for me, but sadly mostly miss. The first one that I found to be slightly funny was the jello one. Simple, but chuckle worthy.

Also, I would seriously consider putting your text on the bottom of the comic because often times I would read the panel and be like ???. Only after that would I realize that there was a caption. It looks more like a title on top of the comic than a caption.

Your linework is pretty good in spots, but you might want to save your images at a slightly higher resolution because they get a little pixely in spots.

I think that almost all of the title captions are superfluous. The jokes are, in most cases, perfectly obvious in context. If you can tell something contextual visually, don't overexplain it in the dialogue. Dialogue needs to flow naturally and a joke is funnier if the reader doesn't have it completely spelled out for them.

These two work great without a caption at all, for example.
http://www.substandardscompliant.com/comics/2009-04-15-webbum-700px.png
http://www.substandardscompliant.com/comics/2009-05-01-issue_8.png

Dee

Thanks earthwormadam - I never thought about the fact that the text should be at the bottom...that is great feedback. I will definately work on the pixelation issue. Thanks a bunch!

Dee

Thanks Willeth - duly noted! I sometimes think I have to explain a joke that I think is visually apparent...I guess I should go with my instincts more.

NibCrom

Surprisingly, I actually like your art. It's not the greatest, but I kinda like it for some reason.

#11 - I think crossing the streams was already a sort of tongue in cheek reference to that. So I don't think this joke really works to well. Also, right now the dialogue reads from right to left, instead of left to right.

#3 - This one reads from right to left as well. Dialogue in comics should for the most part read from left to right and top to bottom, it's much more natural that way.

Also, Substandards Compliant is a really weird title. I would go so far to say that it is bad. It's really long doesn't roll off the tongue. I don't think it's easy to remember either. I think your comic has potential, but the name is not doing it any favors.

Dee

Thanks NibCrom,

I agree on the issue with the wording...definitely something I need to work on. Also, the name is an issue and at first didn't bother me as much since at first this comic was more of a personal project but now that I am trying to craft it to be more than that...but I think I will need to rework the title...

Thanks so much!

Mustang

I really like the iphone killer gag, that really hit the mark.

I really can't add anything else that the others haven't already said.

srsizzy

None of them were funny, and only bordered on family/campy "funny," and then the uncreative shot at Tim Burton just annoyed me. "His movies suck lawl." I don't really know any way to constructively say that none of the jokes "worked for me." I guess there's a lot that could be delved into concerning how to "write funny," but I think it's something that comes with time or doesn't come at all.

ManonvonSuperock

I blabbered on about the construction of jokes and the objectiveness of humor in some other cat's thread recently... I forget who. either badsalt or aliensomething.

also, despite what it says over your avatar, I always read your name as Sister Sizzy.

Mustang

I read it as Sir Sizzy.

ManonvonSuperock

could also be señor sizzy

Robcham

Senior Citizen

Dee

Thank you all for taking the time to give me feedback. I started on another strip recently that is a more conventional, story driven one and I think I may focus my efforts on that one. One thing I have found is that 1 panel strips are very hard to write for and for the most part are hit and miss...with my new strip, which is more story driven is easier to write since its taken from my life and in a different art style. Once I get a few more under my belt I will post them to get feedback on that one as well...Thanks again.

DeeLock

Dude...Tim Burton is amazing.

You have to realize that he's not remaking the movies, he's reinterpreting the source material and putting his own spin on it. Planet of the Apes, Willy Wonka, and Sleepy Hollow were books years before they were movies.

Jerk.

Dee

Sorry if I hurt your feelings DeeLock...on this one we will have to agree to disagree.

ManonvonSuperock

yeah, main problem is that the shit's not funny, but trying too hard.

it has a very 'college newspaper' feel to it.

MagicToaster

Dee wrote: »

This one right here. We read from left to right, so to me the bird should be on the left, because his dialouge comes first... then the girl with that other logo on the right. Other than that technical note, I have to ask, was Starbucks teaming up with Twitter but then chose that other company? If not, it's kinda random.

Dee

Thanks for the feedback MagicToaster, and yes, it was meant to be random - had nothing to do with starbucks teaming with twitter or anything. Thanks again.

KalTorak

Might be a pet peeve, but in the dialogue there you're missing a comma.

"It's not what it looks like Twitter!"

has a different meaning than

"It's not what it looks like, Twitter!"

shanemabus

i enjoy your line work, do you use a tablet?

i guess i dont feel any relation to your work or your humor, so it hard for me to become absorbed

although i don't have any criticism that would help so i apologize