This thread is of a Sexual Nature

Cpt Awkward

So, I'm an awkward bastard

See -

There's a girl, who is smokin', and she arouses great sentiment in me (nudge nudge) Only, not in situations in which I actually need a great sentiment.

We were sitting there in the car slobbering on each other when she started to lean down to apply mouth to dick. neat-o, lovely. but instead of going harder like i should, i deflate like a fucking popped balloon, and then I'm like "shit shit i need an erection" and that doesn't help at all. She got up after a while of trying all "it's okay, it's okay", but it's still humiliating. Argh.

I've had perfectly normal erections before when I'm just sitting there staring at her in class or something. So I figure it must jsut be nerves or something. any advice on how to get the hell over that would be mightily appreciated.

:!:

TwistedJester

Performance anxiety. It happens. It goes away after a while, just don't put pressure on yourself and be sure to relax.

Nucsh

TwistedJester wrote:

Performance anxiety. It happens. It goes away after a while, just don't put pressure on yourself and be sure to relax.

Abracadaniel

Yeah, first uh...manual...uh...situation made me pretty nervous, but you just have to push that to the back of your mind and just relax and be in the moment.

And hey you could always return the favor to help rev your own motor, so to speak...

bone daddy

If you are or were taking any medications (OTC or otherwise) this might be a combo effect from nerves and them. Other things (fatigue, alcohol consumption, etc.) can cause the same problem. Most aren't enough to turn your penis into a deflatormaus by themselves--unless you've really overdone it with them, in which case you'd probably have suspected them right away--but they can turn a mild case of performance anxiety into a total no-go.

Chop Logic

Smart Hero wrote:

And hey you could always return the favor to help rev your own motor, so to speak...

I always lose my boner when I do that. Not because i dont think its sexy or anyhting, I dont know, I just lose it for some reason. Unless we're doing 69.

bone daddy

Chop Logic wrote:

Smart Hero wrote:

And hey you could always return the favor to help rev your own motor, so to speak...

I always lose my boner when I do that. Not because i dont think its sexy or anyhting, I dont know, I just lose it for some reason. Unless we're doing 69.

The absence of direct manual stimulation + needing to concentrate on something else = flag flying at half-mast for a lot of guys. So long as it pops back up when it's needed, it's not a big deal.

Needing to concentrate on something that isn't his penis's barometric pressure for a bit and knowing that she's not going to be too disappointed even if he can't get it back up, however, can get a dude out of a bad case of the limp-dick freakouts.

Comahawk

Smart Hero wrote:

Yeah, first uh...manual...uh...situation made me pretty nervous, but you just have to push that to the back of your mind and just relax and be in the moment.

And hey you could always return the favor to help rev your own motor, so to speak...

Yeah, first time for me I got these wierd muscle spasms in my right side... Made me do this wierd jerk to the right in reaction... Chick gave me an odd look but went on.

Shit happens though, just relax, go with it.

Food?

Just relax, you're nervous.

Hoz

Or you're gay. But that's okay.

Staleghoti

You're puttin the pussy on a pedestal

WeeSneak

Hoz wrote:

Or you're gay. But that's okay.

Seconded.

Thanatos

WeeSneak wrote:

Hoz wrote:

Or you're gay. But that's okay.

Seconded.

While this is a possibility, it's not really likely.

Like everyone else says, it's probably just performance anxiety.

Hoz

Can't we all work on making him think he's gay? It would make for a hilarious sitcom.

Thanatos

Hoz wrote:

Can't we all work on making him think he's gay? It would make for a hilarious sitcom.

Or we could work on giving him helpful advice, which would make for a lot fewer bannings.

Sam

does this happening to a young guy pretty much garuntee the end of a serious sexual relationship? I mean I imagine it's a hell of a turn off.

Thanatos

Sam wrote:

does this happening to a young guy pretty much garuntee the end of a serious sexual relationship? I mean I imagine it's a hell of a turn off.

It depends on the girl, and how the guy reacts to it.

If your first reaction is "oh, this has never happened before, so it must be you," then yeah, she's probably going to bail, and rightfully so.

However, if you explain it to her in more of a "oh, man, you're so hot, and so attractive, and I feel like I should be doing so much to please you, that I just get so nervous" kind of way, you're likely to get a lot more mileage out of it, and she's a lot more likely to be willing to give it another shot.

bone daddy

Sam wrote:

does this happening to a young guy pretty much garuntee the end of a serious sexual relationship? I mean I imagine it's a hell of a turn off.

Some women still have this weird idea that it's a simple matter of a dude saying "Penis, I command you!" and getting his dick to do whatever he wants. If the girl is of that persuasion, then anything along the lines of premature ejaculation or loss of erection is probably going to doom the relationship unless she can be made to understand that the guy isn't doing it deliberately to fuck with her head.

Most chicks are a lot more understanding and know that basic physiology comes into play a lot more than the power of Greyskull. It can generally be gotten past so long as she's not just in it for sex and the guy doesn't freak out and make things so awkward that nobody can look each other in the eye for a month.

LondonBridge

Could be performance anxiety, she wasn't doing it right or... you jacked off 10 times before the date.

DynamiteKid

It's the fear. You need to stop thinking 'I'm having sex, oh my god.'

Basically, ignore the part of your brain saying 'YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG!' with an ebaumsworld picture.

Just relax. It'll go away eventually.

tony_important

bone daddy wrote:

Some women still have this weird idea that it's a simple matter of a dude saying "Penis, I command you!" and getting his dick to do whatever he wants.

As far as I'm concerned, I think it's pretty much the other way around. My dick is a conniving bastard.

But seriously, could it be stress related? This has happened to me when I've had a fuckload of stuff on my mind that I can't stop thinking about. Normally, I just have to take a second or two to get back into the moment, and then it's on.

polarblue

this sounds like a case of mind over matter. you just gotta relax and think happy sexy time thoughts.

if it makes you feel better you are lucky to have found a girl that is understanding rather than "if you dont have an erection you dont think im sexy!"

those girls are hell

JWFokker

Staleghoti wrote:

You're puttin the pussy on a pedestal

redpanda

Sounds like performance anxiety… Relax, have a drink… try again. If all else fails, go topless. Oh yah, nice way to break the ice here at the P.A. forum. 8)

Cpt Awkward

Well, talking about my sexual problems on the internet is how i meet new people, you see.

And, uh, thanks for all the advice, guys. 8)

Akilae729

Shit happened to me one time

turns out I woke up with a cold the next day, so it was just a case of being under the weather

shit really isn't a big deal

Al_wat

Viagra

Soviet Waffle

Cpt Awkward wrote:

Well, talking about my sexual problems on the internet is how i meet new people, you see.

And, uh, thanks for all the advice, guys. 8)

Your username fits this perfectly.

Mmmm... Cocks...

Yea - took me a month or two with my first girl to be able to.
I had honestly for a month thought I didn't work after we went two or three times and it didn't wanna go.
But after a while we got really close - and I even told her how worried I was about it. Low and behold we got really comfortable with each other and fucked like rabbits for the longest time. Once we got over that first time.. shit - it's like there never was a problem.

In the mean time I got hella good with my fingers and tongue.