Let me preclude this by saying I like Michael Ian Black
he was great on Stella, he's the only funny part of I Love the 80's, shows he's involved in are just generally great
but man, that guy's stand-up is so bad
Charles Kinbote on
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ArtreusI'm a wizardAnd that looks fucked upRegistered Userregular
edited July 2009
When the hell is Moon getting wide release anyway. I can't find it anywhere. Maybe it won't be.. in which case I have to hope the local indie theater picks it up because I really want to see it.
For those of you wondering how the show is going: you’re just going to have to wait and watch. I will say this: if you enjoyed “Mind of Mencia,†you’re going to freak out when you see “Michael & Michael!†The shows are so similar it’s eerie. They’re so alike that some people have been asking us if we just took his scripts and reshot them. The answer to that question? Yes.
The Truman Show is fantastic, though I always wondered what it would be like if they had gone through with the original script: In New York City rather than on an island, and Truman is a drunk whose life is a living hell. I seem to recall something about him kidnapping a baby and threatening to kill it in the middle of a crowd of people unless people yelled out his name to prove he was being televised.
EXT. SUBURBAN STREET IN QUEENS. DAY.
TRUMAN drives erratically down a quiet suburban street.
On the sidewalk up ahead, he spies a YOUNG MOTHER pushing an
INFANT in a baby carriage.
Truman suddenly swerves sharply and jumps the curb in front
of the mother and child, the car straddling the sidewalk. He
has the driver's door open almost before the Oldsmobile has come
to a halt. Truman dashes from the car and plucks the infant
from the carriage while the mother stands rooted to the spot.
The startled infant immediately begins to wail as Truman holds
the crying bundle in both hands above his head.
TRUMAN
(to the Mother, motioning to the sidewalk)
Say my name or I'll smash its head open.
The young mother, frozen with fright, does not reply.
TRUMAN
(vehement)
Say my name!
YOUNG MOTHER
(composing herself,
reaching out for her child)
Please, give him to me...
TRUMAN
(screaming above the baby's cries)
Say my name! You know my name! Say it!
YOUNG MOTHER
(bewildered)
I don't know you.
The commotion has attracted the attention of an OLD MAN across
the street, watering his garden. He drops his hose and hurries
towards the fracas. Halfway across the street, the old man
stops in his tracks as he sees the baby, perilously poised in
the air.
TRUMAN
(hysterical)
I mean it! I'm ready to do it!
What's my name?!!
Truman lifts the screaming baby as far above his head as he can,
his arms shaking, fighting the urge to dash the fragile innocent
to the concrete. We see a view of the scene from the POV of a
streetlight. The young mother, recognizing Truman's
seriousness, opens her mouth to speak but no sound comes.
TRUMAN
(entreating the young
woman, tears in his eyes)
This is your last chance!
The anguish in his voice convinces us that Truman is truly on
the brink. The young woman now has tears rolling down her
cheeks. She is at a loss, powerless.
TRUMAN
(his entire body shaking)
What...is...my...name?!
The young woman mumbles but is unable to supply the name.
Truman, arms shaking, face red with rage, realizes he can't go
through with it. With everything he has, he gathers himself.
After what seems like an age, he ever so slowly lowers the
child into the safety of the mother's outstretched arms.
YOUNG MOTHER
(clutching the baby to
her breast, without thinking)
Thank you, Truman.
Truman shudders at the sound of his name and backs away from the
young woman, as if it is she who now represents the threat.
He jumps into his car and slams it into gear, driving over the
sidewalk and back onto the street. The young woman and the old
man stare after Truman's car as it roars away.
Parts of the movie were stupid (like the entire plot) but I enjoyed it for the action scenes. I love dem action scenes with shit blowing up and guns and GIANT FUCKING ROBOTS FIGHTING.
Man what is with you and needing to see obviously terrible movies to confirm they're terrible
The first one was dogshit. Why would the sequel be any better?
To Dublo - I love when Ebert just straight up hates on a movie. He's done it less since his surgeries, and has shown an odd proclivity for religious movies, but it still fills me with joy when he rips a movie to shreds.
To Darmak - You can actually tell what happens in those action sequences? It's all just shiny lights and loud grinding noises to me. The cutting is so choppy that I find it impossible to keep up and/or give a fuck
Man what is with you and needing to see obviously terrible movies to confirm they're terrible
The first one was dogshit. Why would the sequel be any better?
To Dublo - I love when Ebert just straight up hates on a movie. He's done it less since his surgeries, and has shown an odd proclivity for religious movies, but it still fills me with joy when he rips a movie to shreds.
To Darmak - You can actually tell what happens in those action sequences? It's all just shiny lights and loud grinding noises to me. The cutting is so choppy that I find it impossible to keep up and/or give a fuck
Yeah, it seems to be on rare occasion that Ebert completely rips a movie apart, but when it happens, it's something to behold.
I'm becoming more and more disenchanted with fight scenes and car chases. This was made more apparent to me when I watched Taken.
Car chases are just fucking boring.
I don't think robots fighting will cure what's ailing me, either.
I thought I was over car chases, but the second Bourne movie gave me some hope and a second wind. I can say, unironically, that the main chase in that movie is exhillirating.
1. 40 year old virgin
2. forgetting sarah marshall
3. I love you man
4. role models
5. knocked up
6. clueless
7. that movie he did with reese witherspoon where he's going across country or something and dances on a car and they air it in the afternoons on comedy central some time
why anyone who's older than 12 would see transformers / transformers 2 is beyond me
they are shit
you wasted your money watching it, no matter how much buyer's remorse makes you defend your decision.
autono-wally, erotibot300 on
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Bloods EndBlade of TyshallePunch dimensionRegistered Userregular
edited July 2009
I can't believe Transformers 2 almost beat the Dark Knight for box office. That's like telling movie producers as long as it is shiny we don't care what kind of shit they shove down our throats.
I can't believe Transformers 2 almost beat the Dark Knight for box office. That's like telling movie producers as long as it is shiny we don't care what kind of shit they shove down our throats.
1. 40 year old virgin
2. forgetting sarah marshall
3. I love you man
4. role models
5. knocked up
6. clueless
7. that movie he did with reese witherspoon where he's going across country or something and dances on a car and they air it in the afternoons on comedy central some time
I can't believe Transformers 2 almost beat the Dark Knight for box office. That's like telling movie producers as long as it is shiny we don't care what kind of shit they shove down our throats.
Are you honestly surprised?
I mean, seriously?
Actually yeah. I mean the first one was so bad and this one got horrible reviews and had terrible word of mouth. I expected it to still be big but not HUGE.
I can't believe Transformers 2 almost beat the Dark Knight for box office. That's like telling movie producers as long as it is shiny we don't care what kind of shit they shove down our throats.
Are you honestly surprised?
I mean, seriously?
Actually yeah. I mean the first one was so bad and this one got horrible reviews and had terrible word of mouth. I expected it to still be big but not HUGE.
You are aware that the number-one rated television show every year, without fail, is American Idol?
How can you still be surprised when the public at large prefers mindless fluff to anything worthwhile?
Posts
he was great on Stella, he's the only funny part of I Love the 80's, shows he's involved in are just generally great
but man, that guy's stand-up is so bad
Also, it'd be awesome if they could bring in some ringers from their massive cadre of hilarious dudes and ladies
Man on the Moon is one of my favorite movies.
I should watch it tomorrow.
Hahahahahaha
God I love those guys
The Truman Show is fantastic, though I always wondered what it would be like if they had gone through with the original script: In New York City rather than on an island, and Truman is a drunk whose life is a living hell. I seem to recall something about him kidnapping a baby and threatening to kill it in the middle of a crowd of people unless people yelled out his name to prove he was being televised.
it sucked
moving on
Ebert's Transformers 2 review makes me glow.
Parts of the movie were stupid (like the entire plot) but I enjoyed it for the action scenes. I love dem action scenes with shit blowing up and guns and GIANT FUCKING ROBOTS FIGHTING.
Man what is with you and needing to see obviously terrible movies to confirm they're terrible
The first one was dogshit. Why would the sequel be any better?
To Dublo - I love when Ebert just straight up hates on a movie. He's done it less since his surgeries, and has shown an odd proclivity for religious movies, but it still fills me with joy when he rips a movie to shreds.
To Darmak - You can actually tell what happens in those action sequences? It's all just shiny lights and loud grinding noises to me. The cutting is so choppy that I find it impossible to keep up and/or give a fuck
edit: pooro, how often does someone say they need to watch there will be blood again after you post?
Yeah, it seems to be on rare occasion that Ebert completely rips a movie apart, but when it happens, it's something to behold.
these flaws were increased one hundred fold
also, Bay has a sickness
he will constantly cut away from fights or scenes to update us on some other irrelevant shit!
why on earth does he think we care about non-robot fight related activity?
Fairly frequently
Because of the South Park episode that mocked him for not knowing how to do anything that doesn't involve explosions and/or semi-trucks
Car chases are just fucking boring.
I don't think seeing robots fighting will cure what's ailing me, either.
I thought I was over car chases, but the second Bourne movie gave me some hope and a second wind. I can say, unironically, that the main chase in that movie is exhillirating.
Oh... god. I weep for cinema.
why would people even
how do they even
what
Motherfucker, you saw it
You do not get to play that card
It is not in your deck
the damage was done!
I would have been a lot harsher though.
The damage was done!
she's like mrs potatoe head
So you are using "Kicking a man while he's down" as a defense?
Really?
more like throwing myself off a cliff when I know full well how high it is
You are forgetting Jackie Chan's Gen X Cops II
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_E47ZJja3cc
they are shit
you wasted your money watching it, no matter how much buyer's remorse makes you defend your decision.
Are you honestly surprised?
I mean, seriously?
What on Earth did I just watch
I should qualify that too with saying that I thought The Dark Knight was good but not great
YES BONGI EVEN YOU!! >:-(
Actually yeah. I mean the first one was so bad and this one got horrible reviews and had terrible word of mouth. I expected it to still be big but not HUGE.
You are aware that the number-one rated television show every year, without fail, is American Idol?
How can you still be surprised when the public at large prefers mindless fluff to anything worthwhile?