Insight for seemingly random depression?
Frosty the Snow Plow
Registered User regular
Registered User regular
I've been falling in and out of depression for a few years now. I used to think there was some pattern or stimulus for it, but as of this year, I've been finding it to be more random and unpredictable. It just comes and goes without any change or event to trigger it.
The general stuff of depression, I've long since dealt with. I know how to handle it and contextualize any intrusive thoughts. But I'm curious about why it would come and go out of left field without any sort of provocation.
Thanks dudes.
The general stuff of depression, I've long since dealt with. I know how to handle it and contextualize any intrusive thoughts. But I'm curious about why it would come and go out of left field without any sort of provocation.
Thanks dudes.
Frosty the Snow Plow on
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If it's the latter, it's relatively normal for people to, you know, have moods. Sometimes you just feel in a funk. If you're a rather introspective person, you can often trace depression down to something internal. It doesn't even have to be a "big deal" -- in fact, it often isn't. Say, you wanted to cook a steak on Sunday, but got busy and ended up just having something out of a box. And then you're feeling down for the first couple days of the week, because something you were excited about didn't work out. That's perfectly normal, even though the stimulus seemed like a minor thing.
Similarly, most of the time these small bouts of depression aren't serious depression. Do you just feel down or a little under the weather, or do you seriously mope about, not doing anything, barely feeding yourself, wondering what the point of anything is?
Having things in your life that generally make you happy, such as a favorite movie or being able to play an instrument, can often serve to cheer you up if it's simply a mood thing. If it appears to be more serious than that, you might want to look into some sort of professional service.
Diet also, of course.
Weather, drug use (including alcohol), hormones.
Those are my contributions.
People who may not have personal experience will always recommend therapy. I recommend therapy and medication - at least until you know what the issue is.
I always try to pinpoint a cause for it, but often there just doesn't seem to be one. I've been considering that maybe there's no rhyme to it. It just seems to happen.
It might help to mention that depression runs in the family.
The women in my family have similar issues, my sister, my aunt, female cousins and we suspect my late grandmother had some mild depression issues. To hear my family talk about it they say it's not so much that they are actively sad all the time without some medication but that their normal level of happiness or contentment was apparently just a little lower than most, which sort of leads to your feeling like there's no real trigger, it's just pervasive.
Exercise, diet and social activity are of course also things that can help depression. But if you've got a family history it may be that your brain chemistry is actually just a little off so to speak and if that's the case a Psychiatrist should be more than able to find a medication that works best for you. There is of course no shame at all in being medicated.
I know I over-think things. Suicide often presents itself to me as a way to simplify things.
And then some small amount of time later from now, the idea of killing myself will seem like the most irrelevant thing.
How fucking troublesome.
But I'm not a psychologist (I'm a whale biologist!), so go talk to someone who is if you need to. It can't hurt.
Physician, Psychologist, Psychiatrist even a social worker. Talk to someone who has experience in dealing with this. If you're particularly religious, your priest or rabbi or whomever is also an option though one I would view as a secondary option.
When you thought of suicide how close were you? Did you know exactly or roughly what you were going to do? Before this happens again, find out the local number for the crisis/suicide hotline in your area and keep it handy just in case.
You should probably be on medication, however some mood elevators also increase thoughts of suicide which is why you should get a referral from your primary care doctor for a Psychiatrist. They can both prescribe meds for you but the Psychiatrist will not only be equipped to do that but will also be more able to help you with your latent fears of death as well as helping you find a medication that is less likely to increase your suicidal ideation.
You mentioned "Simplifying things" do you ever have a problem in these times of depression where your heart rate and breathing increases to a point where it's very noticeable? Do you feel panicked and scared regardless of the situation? If so you may also have panic attacks. My wife has these and is on some medication to control it so there's certainly a workable solution. Often times when people with panic attacks commit or attempt suicide it is not out of sadness but rather an attempt to gain what they feel like is 'control' of the situation.
Please make an appointment with your doctor for a referral to a psychiatrist or just find a psychiatrist on your own. If cost is an issue, there are clinics and such in each state to help with that.
These, IMO, are common and healthy thoughts. You cannot deny death, embrace it, embrace everything that sucks about your life and live through the pain. The redemption of pain is half the awesome of living.
Psychotherapy is awesome. Everyone should foray into that. It can only help. Even if I felt the most sane person on Earth psychotherapy would be a hell of a source of elation and peace.
BTW; Medication is amazing, but it means nothing. It will not help you. It will only alter the why your mind reacts to your feelings of discomfort in life. As a species we've been medicating ourselves forever with alcohol and local flora, do not think the grandiose claims dispensed by your doctor or anyone else are true in the sense that you will be cured with mood enhancers. Using can and will only help you realize what you've had all along.
I speak from experience. I also recommend non-drug methods of treatment at first, as they have the potential to screw with your mental processes in unexpected and potentially unwanted ways.
Actually, I guess I should mention for context that that wasn't that long ago, and that this is taking place in the interim after getting off it before he assigns something new. And yeah, cost has always been a deterrent. I wasn't aware clinics covered mental, uh, things. What's the word.
EDIT: MindLib, thanks. One of the ideas that has always floated through my head was that perhaps this is all a conclusion of a years-long existential crisis. I kinda came out of it a nihilist, which, practically, isn't very fun. But I guess you don't choose your faiths. When I have nothing else to consume my time, it's where my thoughts usually turn.
edit: And thanks, dudes. Not to seem ungrateful for all the assistance. I'll talk with the doc when I see him next. I probably wasn't as direct about it as I should have been.
Definitely not
Def see a doctor. Tell him everything!!! It will help him help you. If the depression doesnt come from immediate cues it can be something that has been taking years to fester and show itself. Personally i have considered myself to be depressed (on and off) for a very long time. I always thought it was because of my circumstances. But recently it got so bad that I couldn't function. It was the worse it ever got. Saw my doc got some meds and I am okay now. For the first time in a long time. I had something physically wrong with me and realized that my random bouts of depression also were a cause of somethings from my past that I did not realize were still bothering me. I had to really look back and re analyze.
BTW how old are you???
You'll be alright. Just get help. There's alot of options.