My baby is gone

Mim

I just had to put down my baby Harvey (those in the Dog thread on D&D know him by picture). He ruptured a disc and we didn't have the money to pay for his surgery and we had to put him down.

I am so fucking hurt right now. I don't know what to do. I'm trying to stay away from the alcohol. I was with him when they put him down, and it was so fucking hard. Then coming home to my other baby Wiley and seeing her look for him hurt more.

I don't know what to do.

What should I do for Wiley? She's missing him something fierce.

Caramel Genocide

I'm very sorry for your loss - and I understand the kind of pain you are going through, I've been through it myself, many times. And the only thing that I've found that eases the pain is time. Let yourself cry and be angry, nothing will be served if you try to keep it in. If you feel up to it, it might help at some point to write a sort of eulogy, to remember the good times.

matt has a problem

As odd as it sounds, be there for the other dog just like you would for another person. Pet her, play with her, give her more treats, let her sleep on the bed with you if you don't already.

MuddBudd

Did he have a good life? Or at least, was his life good with you? (if you adopted him later on)

There are far worse fates for dogs, from abuse to starvation, to the assholes that force them to fight for entertainment/gambling.

It hurts to lose a pet, but I'm betting you gave him the best life you could, and I bet he was happy. That's the best you can do for them.

Mim

We just had so many plans for him. He weighed 25lbs and we were trying to get him to lose weight. We cut down on his food, tried to play with him more, let him run outside...my grandmother kept fucking up the food thing...

I just wasn't expecting today to be my last day with him, it happened like, within 2 hours. So fast. All because we couldn't afford the $4000 bill to get him the surgery he needed. Which boils my blood. We were looking at insurance options, but alas, we waited too long.

Tried to give him the best life possible, cried in front of him constantly when he was in the office. Broke my heart seeing him scoot around because he lost use of his hind legs but he still panted away like everything was okay.

Trying to be there for Wiley. I'm not sure how hard it has hit her or not, but she looks a little depressed. She just knows my sis and I are crying a lot and my dad is unusually silent and sniffling a lot and that her chubby buddy is gone. My mom is acting normal though.

Shadowfire

He lived in a household where he was loved and treated like a member of the family. A lot of animals don't get the love that Harvey did. It sucks that you couldn't afford the surgery, but don't beat yourself up over it too hard. You loved him the best you could.

We had to put our cat to sleep a couple months ago, one of five. She had been sick for a while, but medication was helping. The other cats had started to get moody as she got worse, though... once we put her to sleep, you could tell they missed her, but they were a bit happier. Animals know this shit, and they get over it sooner or later. Matt said it best, just be there for your other buddy. She'll be ok over some time, just like you will be, but it'll take a while to heal.

Mim

Yeah, I try to keep that in mind. It's just, he was only 4, just TURNED 4. He was still a baby. God, it feels like a claymore exploded in my fucking heart.

Wiley is jumping around right now this early in the morning, I think looking for him. Now I can't sleep and I'm paranoid about her hurting her back as well, I'm tempted to carry her everywhere.

MuddBudd

I'd rather have four years of awesome (which is an easy standard to meet, for a dog) than 10 years or more of terrible.

Mim

MuddBudd wrote: »

I'd rather have four years of awesome (which is an easy standard to meet, for a dog) than 10 years or more of terrible.

I know that's supposed to make me feel better, but god damn does that just make me feel worse.

stawk

I would say get some steaks and eat them with your friends and family and laugh about all the good time you had with the little guy.

i feel your pain, dogs are like parents with their unconditional love, and as much as this sounds like a cliche i still think about my old dogs every single day.

FyreWulff

Allow yourself to cry.

Excercise or do more than you usually do (it helps you deal with the stress).

Alchohol is only going to cover the symptoms.

gigEsmalls

I lost my little pup in April from kidney failure and it chokes me up to write about it now. She was seven years old and still looked like a young puppy. Worst day of my life and you sound like you feel the same. Takes time, maybe lots of it. My local animal shelter has a free grief support group that meets once a month. You can look into that, it helps.

Be there for your other pets too, they need your love more than ever.

SatanIsMyMotor

matthasaproblem wrote: »

As odd as it sounds, be there for the other dog just like you would for another person. Pet her, play with her, give her more treats, let her sleep on the bed with you if you don't already.

In my experience you shouldn't do that. You should not nurture negative behavior because you feel bad for the dog. They are dogs and do not feel emotions in the same way we do. At best you'd just be projecting your feelings on to the dog which is neither fair for the owner or the dog.

That being said, focus on the good things. You still have a great dog and you can still show it the same affection you always would. Stay active as well - it will make you feel better, faster.

Mim

Wiley and Harvey have always laid in the bed, so its not out of the ordinary for Wiley to do it now. She woke up at 1:50 am looking for her buddy.

It's so strange, we put him in a kennel wednesday night, got him home Sunday evening, and lost him Monday afternoon. After he started screaming from pulling his back and losing function of his legs, I had two hours left with him. My dad couldn't be in the room so my sis and I stayed with him, kissing and petting him, and he didn't do any of the things the vet said he might do which would make the process more disturbing but I didn't want him to be alone.

I really wish I had, had the $4000 to get him that surgery. For now, I just keep crying randomly. Looking at the fridge makes me cry because he normally came up and put his nose in there looking at you, telling you "SLICE OF HAM PLEASE 8D". Now he won't do that anymore. We should be getting his ashes soon, plan to have a ceremony.

Months later down the line I would like to get Wiley a playmate. Not to replace Harvey but to just keep her company because during the fall semester the family is out of the house a lot.

I feel like someone just ripped my heart out.