I once had 5 days straight of meetings with a bunch of nuts-and-bolts six-sigma guys. (No offence if any of you are blackbelts) I'm very much a 100,000-foot-level type of person. So you can imagine the pain felt on both ends of the table. Lessons learned from the project? Never send yourself to do something that an intern could fumble around in.
Ugh, the phrase "blackbelt" in that context fills me with anger. Systems Engineering and Lean is not cool. Stop trying to pretend that it is.
I once had 5 days straight of meetings with a bunch of nuts-and-bolts six-sigma guys. (No offence if any of you are blackbelts) I'm very much a 100,000-foot-level type of person. So you can imagine the pain felt on both ends of the table. Lessons learned from the project? Never send yourself to do something that an intern could fumble around in.
Oh my god there is no limit to my hatred for six sigma.
Systems Engineering (SE) is an interdisciplinary approach and means for enabling the realization and deployment of successful systems. It can be viewed as the application of engineering techniques to the engineering of systems, as well as the application of a systems approach to engineering efforts.
So, Systems Engineering is the engineering of Systems? Great.
One of the key innovations of Six Sigma is the professionalization of quality management functions. Prior to Six Sigma, Quality Management in practice was largely relegated to the production floor and to statisticians in a separate quality department. Six Sigma borrows martial arts ranking terminology to define a hierarchy (and career path) that cuts across all business functions and a promotion path straight into the executive suite.
Six Sigma identifies several key roles for its successful implementation.[8]
* Executive Leadership includes CEO and other key top management team members. They are responsible for setting up a vision for Six Sigma implementation. They also empower the other role holders with the freedom and resources to explore new ideas for breakthrough improvements.
* Champions are responsible for the Six Sigma implementation across the organization in an integrated manner. The Executive Leadership draws them from the upper management. Champions also act as mentors to Black Belts. At GE this level of certification is now called "Quality Leader".
* Master Black Belts, identified by champions, act as in-house expert coaches for the organization on Six Sigma. They devote 100% of their time to Six Sigma. They assist champions and guide Black Belts and Green Belts. Apart from the usual rigor of statistics, their time is spent on ensuring integrated deployment of Six Sigma across various functions and departments.
* Experts This level of skill is used primarily within Aerospace and Defense Business Sectors. Experts work across company boundaries, improving services, processes, and products for their suppliers, their entire campuses, and for their customers. Raytheon Incorporated was one of the first companies to introduce Experts to their organizations. At Raytheon, Experts work not only across multiple sites, but across business divisions, incorporating lessons learned throughout the company.[citation needed]
* Black Belts operate under Master Black Belts to apply Six Sigma methodology to specific projects. They devote 100% of their time to Six Sigma. They primarily focus on Six Sigma project execution, whereas Champions and Master Black Belts focus on identifying projects/functions for Six Sigma.
* Green Belts are the employees who take up Six Sigma implementation along with their other job responsibilities. They operate under the guidance of Black Belts and support them in achieving the overall results.
* Yellow Belts are employees who have been trained in Six Sigma techniques as part of a corporate-wide initiative, but have not completed a Six Sigma project and are not expected to actively engage in quality improvement activities[9].
In many recent programs, Green Belts and Black Belts are empowered to initiate, expand, and lead projects in their area of responsibility. The roles as defined above, therefore, conform to the older Mikel Harry/Richard Schroeder model, which is not universally accepted.
In other words experts in Six Sigma are so insure that they have to adopt martial arts terms to describe themselves.
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Podlyyou unzipped me! it's all coming back! i don't like it!Registered Userregular
edited July 2007
I'm actually kind of amazed, becuase I was reading this article. where six sigma is mentioned, and I was all "hey what's six sigma?" And then you guys started talking about it and I was like "WTF? WTF is six sigma?"
I once had 5 days straight of meetings with a bunch of nuts-and-bolts six-sigma guys. (No offence if any of you are blackbelts) I'm very much a 100,000-foot-level type of person. So you can imagine the pain felt on both ends of the table. Lessons learned from the project? Never send yourself to do something that an intern could fumble around in.
Oh my god there is no limit to my hatred for six sigma.
Amen. Rank 'n yank has to be one of the most moronic concepts in business administration. Thankfully, that tree is pretty well poisoned now.
I would work my ranch full-time. I love it there. Either that or be the SWAT cop who gets to kick the door in. Placekicker is also high on my list.
Realistically? University prof. The job I'm working towards right now.
Less realistically? Prime Minister of Earth, as I lead the human race in an expansion throughout the Solar System and to the stars.
My fantasy job? I would be the owner of a dog/cat zoo. Adopt all the cats/dogs in the pounds in Canada and put them all in one gigantic zoo where people can come to watch/play/adopt them.
You mean you didn't pre-order it yet? Man, the waiting lists are full. You can always try to get in, but by the time you get it Web 3.0 will already be out.
I secretly enjoy meetings and am looking forward to our All-Day meeting.
I hope you die in that meeting.
It's just that things are changing a lot in our Division right now, so most of the meetings are actually about things. I'm looking forward to something actually getting accomplished, and that's what these meetings are about lately. It's an exciting time at work...
I secretly enjoy meetings and am looking forward to our All-Day meeting.
I hope you die in that meeting.
It's just that things are changing a lot in our Division right now, so most of the meetings are actually about things. I'm looking forward to something actually getting accomplished, and that's what these meetings are about lately. It's an exciting time at work...
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I had to move a three hundred and fifty pound circle table through and impossibly tight cement corridor today.
What I wouldn't give for a meeting.
Fixed it for you.
Me too. Especially when you realize that most of them are way nerdier/ocd/socially inept than yourself.
And so will I.
And how much pay do I get for being a bum?
3DS: 2852-6809-9411
So, Systems Engineering is the engineering of Systems? Great.
If you could have any job, what would it be?
I would work my ranch full-time. I love it there. Either that or be the SWAT cop who gets to kick the door in. Placekicker is also high on my list.
The table had to get through two small escape doors, and through a corridor that was literally as wide as the table.
Fantasy? Composer/ conductor
Reality? Writer
I secretly enjoy meetings and am looking forward to our All-Day meeting.
Make the table smaller, silly.
I hope I never have to know
I hope you die in that meeting.
A Blackbelt is a twat who is an expert in Six-Sigma shit.
In other words experts in Six Sigma are so insure that they have to adopt martial arts terms to describe themselves.
Less realistically? Prime Minister of Earth, as I lead the human race in an expansion throughout the Solar System and to the stars.
Ha ha!
Edit: Damn, I'm late.
I dunno, a Fighter Pilot or possibly a scientist that doesn't have to attend 8 hour meetings.
I'd love to be a Scuba instructor/dive leader, but I know it would never really make for a worthwhile career.
Either that, or a photographer for something like National Geographic.
Do I have to preorder it?
My fantasy job? I would be the owner of a dog/cat zoo. Adopt all the cats/dogs in the pounds in Canada and put them all in one gigantic zoo where people can come to watch/play/adopt them.
3DS: 2852-6809-9411
she went to Africa last month on a photography trip.
She's also pretty cute, but very 12 year oldish too which is hella creepy.
A male gigolo.
It's just that things are changing a lot in our Division right now, so most of the meetings are actually about things. I'm looking forward to something actually getting accomplished, and that's what these meetings are about lately. It's an exciting time at work...
Well, appart from the last part, it sounds very cool.
Plus, you're gonna be pulling so much pussy as a pro-baller, your gonna need to outsource it.
Call me a rectangle then. :P