Yo where's EWA at. I need to reprimand him for still having that sketchbook. (although if he hasn't been on the forums lately I guess he's really busy)
Haha, that sketchbook started circulating in 2007.
Yo where's EWA at. I need to reprimand him for still having that sketchbook. (although if he hasn't been on the forums lately I guess he's really busy)
Haha, that sketchbook started circulating in 2007.
In that time it has been doodled in by 3 artists.
Wait, I thought this one launched in 2010...
if anyone is clicking in up on the diablo 3 OPEN beta my ID is spoiled, shoot me an invite and lets click around before its over!
NDeR#1355
or just use pm me for my e-mail if that doesn't work
Regardless if the girl changes her mind and decides to date me, I really hope she gets her emotions together soon. This is becoming exhausting
Move on Napp, it's not going to happen. I've been through that enough times myself to know that she loves the attention you send her way because it makes her feel special, but she has no intention of reciprocating it. You are essentially the back up plan. Your 20's don't last forever, so don't waste another second of it on this girl.
Problem is I'm just that actual nice guy who hates seeing people feel like crap. I want her to be happy regardless who it is with so I'm at a shitty point. Also, I wish I knew other single girls...
Who are you? The Florence Nightingale of emotional baggage? Napp, at some stage you have to start looking out for yourself. You have a right to be happy, if she doesn't want to be with you, then let her find someone else who is willing to take on her bullshit. It's not your job, and her thinking it is, is perilously unfair on you.
Probably the more responsible people didn't sign up because they didn't want to forget about it and be seen as that guy (that's my excuse at least), so you wind up with a list of people who do not have a healthy fear of the burning scorn of internet disdain.
Argh! Got most of the way building an Ikea TV stand only to realize that I put one board in backwards. Have to disassemble a good portion of it in order to fix the mistake.
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NappuccinoSurveyor of Things and StuffRegistered Userregular
Regardless if the girl changes her mind and decides to date me, I really hope she gets her emotions together soon. This is becoming exhausting
Move on Napp, it's not going to happen. I've been through that enough times myself to know that she loves the attention you send her way because it makes her feel special, but she has no intention of reciprocating it. You are essentially the back up plan. Your 20's don't last forever, so don't waste another second of it on this girl.
Problem is I'm just that actual nice guy who hates seeing people feel like crap. I want her to be happy regardless who it is with so I'm at a shitty point. Also, I wish I knew other single girls...
Who are you? The Florence Nightingale of emotional baggage? Napp, at some stage you have to start looking out for yourself. You have a right to be happy, if she doesn't want to be with you, then let her find someone else who is willing to take on her bullshit. It's not your job, and her thinking it is, is perilously unfair on you.
Don't friend's typically look out for and support other friends?
Regardless if the girl changes her mind and decides to date me, I really hope she gets her emotions together soon. This is becoming exhausting
Move on Napp, it's not going to happen. I've been through that enough times myself to know that she loves the attention you send her way because it makes her feel special, but she has no intention of reciprocating it. You are essentially the back up plan. Your 20's don't last forever, so don't waste another second of it on this girl.
Problem is I'm just that actual nice guy who hates seeing people feel like crap. I want her to be happy regardless who it is with so I'm at a shitty point. Also, I wish I knew other single girls...
Who are you? The Florence Nightingale of emotional baggage? Napp, at some stage you have to start looking out for yourself. You have a right to be happy, if she doesn't want to be with you, then let her find someone else who is willing to take on her bullshit. It's not your job, and her thinking it is, is perilously unfair on you.
Don't friend's typically look out for and support other friends?
Thing is that she put you in the friend zone. That's not where you wanted to be. So her dragging you down into her world of emotional drama really isn't fair on you. You're only young once, mate. Better to spend your time worry about the emotional issues of somebody that actually wants to be more than just friends with you. By all means, be friendly. Just don't let her force you into spending a bunch of time and energy on her when she didn't want to spend the time or energy trying to see where your relationship could go.
MustangArbiter of Unpopular OpinionsRegistered Userregular
edited April 2012
What Grif said. I know where you're at Napp, I've been there and I sympathise, but I don't want you pissing away your 20's on something that isn't going to happen. Because one day you will turn 30, and you will look back on this and think "Fuck, I wasted a lot of time on that girl". The longer you leave it, the harder it is going to get.
What you need to do is sit her down and say: "Look I really like you and I think we are great friends, but I really want for us to be more than friends, and I don't think you do. So to be fair, I think we should stop seeing each other for a while because I don't think it's right for me to be a confidant to you, and a fair judge of your problems, when I find you so attractive." That way you still come out smelling like roses.
If anything you are going to force her to make a decision about your status in her life. You're either in or you're out. There's none of this middle of the road bullshit where you're left thinking that maybe it will happen one day if you continue to show her what a super nice guy you are. At the end of the day you can't be friends with someone you're attracted to, it's never going to work because you're always going to have an alterior motive. You can try to supress it all you like, but it will keep biting you on the ass regardless.
If that is the way you feel, that you're not willing to expend that much energy and time on someone who you're not banging, that's fine. (I'm not saying that is the way you feel, but that is what people here are proposing) But be honest with her. Yes, friendships can be emotionally draining, regardless of if they are with a boy or a girl. Sorry, I know it sucks, but that is what friends are for. If you don't want to have a friendship with someone who has a lot of emotional drama and baggage, that is fine. But not, oh screw this I'm some poor friend zoned nice guy this isn't worth it!!
And Grifter, I really doubt she is forcing him into spending time and energy on her. C'mon. And only giving her your time if she'll date you??? That's okay if he hadn't already said he was okay with being just friends. It's not like Napp is some poor dummy being taken advantage of here. Try to think of it from her perspective. A friend had a crush on me, I turned them down, we're still going to be friends though.
Edit: For the record, saying friend-zoned is really silly. Sorry. Except not really sorry at all.
editedit: Yeah, I agree with a lot of what Mustang said. You can't be a good friend to her at all while you have an ulterior motive. And you can deny that you have one, but. It sure as heck sounds like you do. You are either her Platonic Friend or her Not Friend At All.
And Grifter, I really doubt she is forcing him into spending time and energy on her. C'mon. And only giving her your time if she'll date you??? That's okay if he hadn't already said he was okay with being just friends. It's not like Napp is some poor dummy being taken advantage of here. Try to think of it from her perspective. A friend had a crush on me, I turned them down, we're still going to be friends though.
Edit: For the record, saying friend-zoned is really silly. Sorry. Except not really sorry at all.
I find it entertaining that you want to look down on what I said but agree with Mustang who agreed with me.
"Friend zone" is a phrase that upsets some people because it was either created or siezed by misogynist types who felt entitled to girls or something? It's another history I'm not clear on, but I know it's a hot term in the world of social justice.
But it's not the myth people treat it as, depending on what it means. Sometimes people do reject someone by trying to offer friendship as a consolation, out of fear of being outright mean. I've done it. It is a thing that literally happens. But "friend zone" represents more than just rejection at this point.
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NappuccinoSurveyor of Things and StuffRegistered Userregular
edited April 2012
I don't have an ulterior motive here. If she wants to date me I wouldn't mind dating her, but as it stands I'd rather just find someone with less issues to date. Who knows if I will be able to find that person though. At least, on a reasonable timeline.
That doesn't mean I don't care about her and that I'm just going to forget about what she's going through either.
The problem I was having was getting a boat load of mixed signals from her. And trying to deal with those simultaneously getting my hopes up while trying to be reasonable about everything.
From my understanding the 'friend zone' is where party A has unspoken feelings for party B, and party B sees those feelings, but is willfully ignorant to them because he or she is unwilling to deal with the unpleasantness that comes with rejecting party A. Meanwhile party A is unwilling to subject themselves to rejection and internalizes the whole thing.
I don't think it's very productive for anyone to declare themselves in the friendzone, it's kind of like giving up because it's the best you can get, which is just sad.
It doesn't matter if you want the person as a significant other if they don't want you, so even if it's hard you just have to force yourself to eliminate it as a possibility. Go do something else and forget about it. Otherwise you look like a dog staring up at the table hoping for food scraps, and not in the cute way.
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NappuccinoSurveyor of Things and StuffRegistered Userregular
edited April 2012
Before anyone thinks I'm doing that- I've already told her that I like her and would like to date her if/when she's ready. Main problem is, I think she has no idea what she wants.
I don't have incredibly strong feelings for the girl- She's just someone I get along with really well and share a lot of interests with. She'd be fun to date and see where it goes. This isn't some sort of unrequited love dealio... the main reason why I'm bummed / stressing about it is just because there aren't that many single girls here in the first place. I'd really like to at least give this a shot because- as long as I'm here, who knows when the next single girl I really get along with with will come around.
Really, when I say I don't mind being just friends with her, that is the truth. But that doesn't mean I can instantly shift my perspective either (I thought we were at least getting to the dating stage) so that is the main thing that is difficult about this.
Man, if you really want to date her just throw a burlap sack over her head and throw her in your trunk. Then take her to your special dating cabin for a weekend of romantic activities like Lotion Time and 20 Things I Learned About You Through Your Trash.
Man, if you really want to date her just throw a burlap sack over her head and throw her in your trunk. Then take her to your special dating cabin for a weekend of romantic activities like Lotion Time and 20 Things I Learned About You Through Your Trash.
A variation of this was employed in the old musical Seven Brides for Seven Brothers. And it worked. It's terrible and terribly awesome.
"Friend zone" is a phrase that upsets some people because it was either created or siezed by misogynist types who felt entitled to girls or something?
... But "friend zone" represents more than just rejection at this point.
It tends to mean dishonest women. Things like "I'm not looking for a relationship right now" or "I need some time to be alone" or "Chivalry is dead, where are all the 'nice guys' these days" and they turn around and date some abusive, delinquent, ungentlemanly prick like... right then... without hesitation... often on the same night.
If they just said "fuck you" or, "you're not my type" or "I don't like you like that" it wouldn't be that big a deal.
But I suppose self-esteem is esteemed higher than honesty these days.
ninjai on
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NappuccinoSurveyor of Things and StuffRegistered Userregular
My suggestion is to just not be constantly obsessed about finding a girlfriend.
But...I'm not?
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain all this because it seems like it is common sense. I'm a happy single dude the majority of the time. There are times when I wish I were seeing someone, but not so much that I'll leap out and chase down any single girl I see. Mostly, I think it would be really nice to date someone, but it isn't a necessity in my life. I talk about it often because I'm going through the "I'm so close to dating but not dating" stage where it is confusing and talking it out is probably a good idea.
My suggestion is to just not be constantly obsessed about finding a girlfriend.
But...I'm not?
My suggestion is to stop being something that doesn't match our quickly formed opinions of you!
I mean come on, show some decency and conform to our preconceptions already!
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NappuccinoSurveyor of Things and StuffRegistered Userregular
edited April 2012
Fine, I'll just making boring revealing posts about how happy I am to balance out the ones where I need to release a bit of stress lol
some happy insight into my life:
On friday, I worked a fundraising wine tasting for the local Community Counseling Center-
Saturday I went out to the local Hiking park with about 6 friends and cleaned up trash for about 3 hours (we found a fucking oil drum! And we almost got hit by a train), Then had dinner with a friend I hadn't seen in about a year, finally went down town with my roomates and played some darts.
Sunday my parents came down to visit which was really nice... then I did homework until 1am (which was less nice)
So... it isn't like I'm just sitting at home lamenting my lack of girlfriends
Fine, I'll just making boring revealing posts about how happy I am
You think we're entertained by your misery? What sort of sadists do you take us for!?
On an unrelated note, I watched My Neighbor Totoro for the first time last night. As much as I really liked it, I don't think I would have as an attention deficit, power rangers-loving, attention deficit little kid who loved power rangers (and pokemon). I was 11 (maybe 12) when Spirited Away came out and it changed me, man.
Strange thing is, I watched Totoro so that I could read the urban legend about the movie without spoiling it for me. And then I watched Princess Mononoke because it's one of my favourite films.
Man, if you really want to date her just throw a burlap sack over her head and throw her in your trunk. Then take her to your special dating cabin for a weekend of romantic activities like Lotion Time and 20 Things I Learned About You Through Your Trash.
hahaha
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EncA Fool with CompassionPronouns: He, Him, HisRegistered Userregular
edited April 2012
I am entertained. Tell me more about your miseries, wretched humans. Let me dine upon your malcontent.
/Emotional Vampire
Totoro is actually my least favorite of Miyazaki's things. It has some neat stuff, but it felt like the plot was thrown together haphazardly with no real lesson or purpose to it (at least, compared to his other works). I had a similar problem with Spirited Away, it was pretty but I didn't really feel the narrative was strongly tied together.
My favorite was always Laputa, Castle in the Sky but I can't honestly say that it's because its a great move so much as its a great movie filled with Airships. I've always thought Howl's Moving Castle or Nausicca had the most internally coherent plot.
Posts
Yes. :P Also, I can't sleep anymore.
Haha, that sketchbook started circulating in 2007.
In that time it has been doodled in by 3 artists.
Wait, I thought this one launched in 2010...
if anyone is clicking in up on the diablo 3 OPEN beta my ID is spoiled, shoot me an invite and lets click around before its over!
or just use pm me for my e-mail if that doesn't work
I think I added you but I didn't get any confirmation it went through, and then they brought the servers down for maintenance so...
That, and i'm soon off to work :C I think it may still be up when I get back though. Depends on if we wrap up early.
Who are you? The Florence Nightingale of emotional baggage? Napp, at some stage you have to start looking out for yourself. You have a right to be happy, if she doesn't want to be with you, then let her find someone else who is willing to take on her bullshit. It's not your job, and her thinking it is, is perilously unfair on you.
Is that the one Paz and I drew in? I shudder to think what those drawings looked like.
Probably the more responsible people didn't sign up because they didn't want to forget about it and be seen as that guy (that's my excuse at least), so you wind up with a list of people who do not have a healthy fear of the burning scorn of internet disdain.
Twitter
Don't friend's typically look out for and support other friends?
Thing is that she put you in the friend zone. That's not where you wanted to be. So her dragging you down into her world of emotional drama really isn't fair on you. You're only young once, mate. Better to spend your time worry about the emotional issues of somebody that actually wants to be more than just friends with you. By all means, be friendly. Just don't let her force you into spending a bunch of time and energy on her when she didn't want to spend the time or energy trying to see where your relationship could go.
I think that one is even older and ended up lost to the void forever.
The one that I handed off had some doodles by me, Sieg, Bog, Lexxy, and (I think) Lexxy's brother Ian.
I drew, like, a single thing in it after having it for close to 2 years, and it was done about 15 minutes before I gave it back to Sieg.
What you need to do is sit her down and say: "Look I really like you and I think we are great friends, but I really want for us to be more than friends, and I don't think you do. So to be fair, I think we should stop seeing each other for a while because I don't think it's right for me to be a confidant to you, and a fair judge of your problems, when I find you so attractive." That way you still come out smelling like roses.
If anything you are going to force her to make a decision about your status in her life. You're either in or you're out. There's none of this middle of the road bullshit where you're left thinking that maybe it will happen one day if you continue to show her what a super nice guy you are. At the end of the day you can't be friends with someone you're attracted to, it's never going to work because you're always going to have an alterior motive. You can try to supress it all you like, but it will keep biting you on the ass regardless.
And Grifter, I really doubt she is forcing him into spending time and energy on her. C'mon. And only giving her your time if she'll date you??? That's okay if he hadn't already said he was okay with being just friends. It's not like Napp is some poor dummy being taken advantage of here. Try to think of it from her perspective. A friend had a crush on me, I turned them down, we're still going to be friends though.
Edit: For the record, saying friend-zoned is really silly. Sorry. Except not really sorry at all.
editedit: Yeah, I agree with a lot of what Mustang said. You can't be a good friend to her at all while you have an ulterior motive. And you can deny that you have one, but. It sure as heck sounds like you do. You are either her Platonic Friend or her Not Friend At All.
My wife asked me to cook once, it was so terrible that she's never asked me again.
I find it entertaining that you want to look down on what I said but agree with Mustang who agreed with me.
But it's not the myth people treat it as, depending on what it means. Sometimes people do reject someone by trying to offer friendship as a consolation, out of fear of being outright mean. I've done it. It is a thing that literally happens. But "friend zone" represents more than just rejection at this point.
That doesn't mean I don't care about her and that I'm just going to forget about what she's going through either.
The problem I was having was getting a boat load of mixed signals from her. And trying to deal with those simultaneously getting my hopes up while trying to be reasonable about everything.
I don't think it's very productive for anyone to declare themselves in the friendzone, it's kind of like giving up because it's the best you can get, which is just sad.
It doesn't matter if you want the person as a significant other if they don't want you, so even if it's hard you just have to force yourself to eliminate it as a possibility. Go do something else and forget about it. Otherwise you look like a dog staring up at the table hoping for food scraps, and not in the cute way.
I don't have incredibly strong feelings for the girl- She's just someone I get along with really well and share a lot of interests with. She'd be fun to date and see where it goes. This isn't some sort of unrequited love dealio... the main reason why I'm bummed / stressing about it is just because there aren't that many single girls here in the first place. I'd really like to at least give this a shot because- as long as I'm here, who knows when the next single girl I really get along with with will come around.
Really, when I say I don't mind being just friends with her, that is the truth. But that doesn't mean I can instantly shift my perspective either (I thought we were at least getting to the dating stage) so that is the main thing that is difficult about this.
A variation of this was employed in the old musical Seven Brides for Seven Brothers. And it worked. It's terrible and terribly awesome.
It tends to mean dishonest women. Things like "I'm not looking for a relationship right now" or "I need some time to be alone" or "Chivalry is dead, where are all the 'nice guys' these days" and they turn around and date some abusive, delinquent, ungentlemanly prick like... right then... without hesitation... often on the same night.
If they just said "fuck you" or, "you're not my type" or "I don't like you like that" it wouldn't be that big a deal.
But I suppose self-esteem is esteemed higher than honesty these days.
But...I'm not?
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain all this because it seems like it is common sense. I'm a happy single dude the majority of the time. There are times when I wish I were seeing someone, but not so much that I'll leap out and chase down any single girl I see. Mostly, I think it would be really nice to date someone, but it isn't a necessity in my life. I talk about it often because I'm going through the "I'm so close to dating but not dating" stage where it is confusing and talking it out is probably a good idea.
My suggestion is to stop being something that doesn't match our quickly formed opinions of you!
I mean come on, show some decency and conform to our preconceptions already!
some happy insight into my life:
On friday, I worked a fundraising wine tasting for the local Community Counseling Center-
Saturday I went out to the local Hiking park with about 6 friends and cleaned up trash for about 3 hours (we found a fucking oil drum! And we almost got hit by a train), Then had dinner with a friend I hadn't seen in about a year, finally went down town with my roomates and played some darts.
Sunday my parents came down to visit which was really nice... then I did homework until 1am (which was less nice)
So... it isn't like I'm just sitting at home lamenting my lack of girlfriends
You think we're entertained by your misery? What sort of sadists do you take us for!?
On an unrelated note, I watched My Neighbor Totoro for the first time last night. As much as I really liked it, I don't think I would have as an attention deficit, power rangers-loving, attention deficit little kid who loved power rangers (and pokemon). I was 11 (maybe 12) when Spirited Away came out and it changed me, man.
Strange thing is, I watched Totoro so that I could read the urban legend about the movie without spoiling it for me. And then I watched Princess Mononoke because it's one of my favourite films.
hahaha
/Emotional Vampire
Totoro is actually my least favorite of Miyazaki's things. It has some neat stuff, but it felt like the plot was thrown together haphazardly with no real lesson or purpose to it (at least, compared to his other works). I had a similar problem with Spirited Away, it was pretty but I didn't really feel the narrative was strongly tied together.
My favorite was always Laputa, Castle in the Sky but I can't honestly say that it's because its a great move so much as its a great movie filled with Airships. I've always thought Howl's Moving Castle or Nausicca had the most internally coherent plot.