Well the estimates I read were more like 5'5", 400 pounds, and maybe 5 times as strong as a really strong human. And my (limited) understanding of judo and other soft martial arts is that they're designed to use someone's strength against him, so they can certainly defeat a much stronger human. But, like BloodySloth mentioned, maybe the body of a Gorilla is different enough that it wouldn't work at all, or maybe they're just so much stronger that it can't be overcome.
Tell you what, you can go first. I got your back. For reals.
Orangutans really do look like a pile of old brown laundry.
A pile of laundry that can lift 500 pounds with one hand. This is not an exaggeration. Apparently a female orangutan was seen to do this when angry once, in a zoo.
Orangutans really do look like a pile of old brown laundry.
A pile of laundry that can lift 500 pounds with one hand. This is not an exaggeration. Apparently a female orangutan was seen to do this when angry once, in a zoo.
Well the estimates I read were more like 5'5", 400 pounds, and maybe 5 times as strong as a really strong human. And my (limited) understanding of judo and other soft martial arts is that they're designed to use someone's strength against him, so they can certainly defeat a much stronger human. But, like BloodySloth mentioned, maybe the body of a Gorilla is different enough that it wouldn't work at all, or maybe they're just so much stronger that it can't be overcome.
Tell you what, you can go first. I got your back. For reals.
Orangutans really do look like a pile of old brown laundry.
A pile of laundry that can lift 500 pounds with one hand. This is not an exaggeration. Apparently a female orangutan was seen to do this when angry once, in a zoo.
Right turn, Clyde.
Theres no way you could fight a gorilla, youd have a better chance against a lion. You'd be hard pressed to beat a gorilla if it let you take the first swing and you were allowed to use a Morning Star.
I apoligize for my use of literally, I'm trying to break that habit.
Also, my mom saved all our schoolwork from when my brothers and I were in elementary school. Looking back on my K-4th Grade stuff, I was very very serious about being an "Otter Trainer" when I grew up.
Where did I go wrong.
mxmarks on
PSN: mxmarks - WiiU: mxmarks - twitter: @ MikesPS4 - twitch.tv/mxmarks - "Yes, mxmarks is the King of Queens" - Unbreakable Vow
I always put down that I wanted to be a scientist, but I'm pretty sure "Super-Villain" would have been a more accurate term. I always imagined a scientist saying things like, "Let's splice scorpion DNA into this elephant to guard our laboratory!" then acting upon them.
Edit: Also building gigantic robots.
Either way, before I was enlightened to how cool Octopuses were by this thread, I've always had a liking for polar bears.
No specific reason, aside from them being pretty cool. Haha, get it? Cold weather? Priceless!
Has anyone seem this awesome video of microscopic pond life?
Man, hydra are so cool. They're also very likely immortal (or perhaps "ageless" would be a better term). Perhaps there's something we can learn from them.
Theres no way you could fight a gorilla, youd have a better chance against a lion. You'd be hard pressed to beat a gorilla if it let you take the first swing and you were allowed to use a Morning Star.
The first swing would be to take away your morning star. Then he'd show all his gorilla friends his new "human on a stick" toy.
I think a human would be more fucked while fighting a lion, but I'm not sure.
Because gorillas have intense emotions, apparently, maybe it's harder to drive them away when they're pissed, whereas great cats are occasionally repelled by damage to facial organs.
I suppose it doesn't matter whether a strike from their limb disembowels you or collapses your chest cavity though.
A lion will fuck you up, but unless you get caught in it's jaws or it's standing on you (both are real possibilites of course), you can run like hell and try to hide. When running away it's either got to jump on you or catch you in it's teeth.
A gorilla can grab your arm and pull it out of it's socket, WHILE biting you.
mxmarks on
PSN: mxmarks - WiiU: mxmarks - twitter: @ MikesPS4 - twitch.tv/mxmarks - "Yes, mxmarks is the King of Queens" - Unbreakable Vow
Tigers: My favorite for a number of reasons, or so I thought until a couple years ago. Then I realized it was for one reason above all others:
Yeah, I told myself it was because how majestic they were, great hunters, beautiful fur, being cool in general, while subconsciously I just wanted to have a Hobbes of my own.
lions can run up to 50 mph, while gorillas can run up to 25 mph - maximum speeds over short distances.
Record-setting human peak athletes reach about 27 mph.
You cannot run from a lion. You might, if you are pumped on adrenaline and the gorilla is tired or weak, be able to run from a gorilla for a short time.
lions can run up to 50 mph, while gorillas can run up to 25 mph - maximum speeds over short distances.
Record-setting human peak athletes reach about 27 mph.
You cannot run from a lion. You might, if you are pumped on adrenaline and the gorilla is tired or weak, be able to run from a gorilla for a short time.
Dude, go back a few pages and read what I wrote about the guy who tried to have a cage-match with a chimp. It's a good (if disturbing) story.
And that was a chimp. A gorilla is about five times larger. Granted, I think gorillas have about half the attitude that a chimp has and that does make a difference - gorillas are big but gentle, chimps are small and have the capacity to be extremely mean.
However, for all our would-be gorilla gladiators (not talking about EM)... how exactly are you going to damage it? This is assuming this is a fist fight and the human doesn't have a machine gun, obviously. I've done enough work with gorilla/primate skulls to tell you that punching it in the face isn't going to do a damn thing other than put your arms right next to its massive fangs. Punching it in the chest/stomach is going to do even less because they have what looks like a huge beer gut...made of solid muscle. So, how are you going to hurt it? Attack its gigantic arms (which are strong enough to support its entire weight all day - gorillas walk on their knuckles)? Do a sweep kick to its 80-pound legs?
lions can run up to 50 mph, while gorillas can run up to 25 mph - maximum speeds over short distances.
Record-setting human peak athletes reach about 27 mph.
You cannot run from a lion. You might, if you are pumped on adrenaline and the gorilla is tired or weak, be able to run from a gorilla for a short time.
You are not going to reach record speeds or even near record speeds. You are going to reach possibly strong human speeds. What I can find is that the average 18 year old can run about 15 miles per hour over a short difference.
i think you're probably fucked if you have a shotgun and you get charged by a gorilla
my point is, lions are more dangerous because they are specifically evolved to hunt and kill their prey - which includes primates.
frankly that means that you're extremely dead either way.
I know you weren't, I put it in an edit.
Still, I say a pissed-off gorilla is more dangerous, simply because a gorilla can grab you and hold on to you. Which, I know a lion has claws for that purpose, but I'd say it'd be easier to escape a big cat's grip (which would be very difficult) than a full-grown gorilla's (which would probably be impossible).
But, as you said, you're deader than dogshit either way, it's just a matter of how.
EDIT:
This is nature's way of saying, "Not a chance in hell."
Well, one of them.
EDIT 2: Because I realized this thread needs more tarsiers.
i think you're probably fucked if you have a shotgun and you get charged by a gorilla
my point is, lions are more dangerous because they are specifically evolved to hunt and kill their prey - which includes primates.
frankly that means that you're extremely dead either way.
I know you weren't, I put it in an edit.
Still, I say a pissed-off gorilla is more dangerous, simply because a gorilla can grab you and hold on to you. Which, I know a lion has claws for that purpose, but I'd say it'd be easier to escape a big cat's grip (which would be very difficult) than a full-grown gorilla's (which would probably be impossible).
But, as you said, you're deader than dogshit either way, it's just a matter of how.
EDIT:
This is nature's way of saying, "Not a chance in hell."
i saw pictures of a polar bear attack victim recently
you could see his skull. i was not aware that the scalp was that thick a layer of flesh, but there was a good inch of stuff visible in the cross section.
his ankle was mostly gone, connected to his leg by a few strands of flesh and two bones, one of which was mostly splintered
his back was a mess of deep gouges and bloody craters, some of which were bleeding profusely even in the hospital after treatment
i'm pretty sure he lived, although he wasn't happy about it.
bears are not cute. they are also more dangerous than pretty much any land predator in the world - polar bears, grizzly bears and brown bears, that is. black bears are probably comparable to gorillas or great cats in terms of how dangerous they are.
Aren't bears in fact the fiercest of all beasts? Bigger than both gorillas, lions, and even tigers.
Of course, they're adorable, so I wouldn't really be afraid of one.
They may be adorable, but I nearly pissed myself thinking of how close that photographer got to a GOD DAMNED BEAR.
@ Evil Multifarious: I've only been in bear country (hiking) a handful of times, and only seen one at a distance a couple of times. They seemed to stay away if we made noise. It makes me feel better thinking about bear victims if I assume they were trying to be close to a bear.
i saw pictures of a polar bear attack victim recently
you could see his skull. i was not aware that the scalp was that thick a layer of flesh, but there was a good inch of stuff visible in the cross section.
his ankle was mostly gone, connected to his leg by a few strands of flesh and two bones, one of which was mostly splintered
his back was a mess of deep gouges and bloody craters, some of which were bleeding profusely even in the hospital after treatment
i'm pretty sure he lived, although he wasn't happy about it.
bears are not cute. they are also more dangerous than pretty much any land predator in the world - polar bears, grizzly bears and brown bears, that is. black bears are probably comparable to gorillas or great cats in terms of how dangerous they are.
Black bears, on the other hand, will fucking eat you.
And they're also much better at sneaking than their larger cousins. Think about that for a minute--stealth bears.
Any animal will hunt a human. My cat stalks and attacks me from under the table. Bears can be scary, I grew up in Grizzly country and many a time the school was on lockdown for recess because a grizzly was in teh school yard.
Okay, there's fucking creepy vid I've seen on every "When Animals <violent adjective>" series, since like ever, of a Black bear basically stalking a guy who's filming the whole thing, while walking backwards, screaming "Go away bear!". As ridiculous as it sounds, it's kind of terrifying, because this bear is just like "Haha, I'm going to keeeeellll you ..." Not running after the guy ... just keeping up the pace. For a good few minutes.
Unfortunately, Youtube and Google combined give me NOTHING, so all I have is this: a clip from one of said shows, that has one good Grizzly charge, and a drawn out re-enactment. Oh! And shiny graphics!
Any animal will hunt a human. My cat stalks and attacks me from under the table. Bears can be scary, I grew up in Grizzly country and many a time the school was on lockdown for recess because a grizzly was in teh school yard.
i saw pictures of a polar bear attack victim recently
you could see his skull. i was not aware that the scalp was that thick a layer of flesh, but there was a good inch of stuff visible in the cross section.
his ankle was mostly gone, connected to his leg by a few strands of flesh and two bones, one of which was mostly splintered
his back was a mess of deep gouges and bloody craters, some of which were bleeding profusely even in the hospital after treatment
i'm pretty sure he lived, although he wasn't happy about it.
bears are not cute. they are also more dangerous than pretty much any land predator in the world - polar bears, grizzly bears and brown bears, that is. black bears are probably comparable to gorillas or great cats in terms of how dangerous they are.
They had a discussion about bears on QI. Apparently, during the 1800s, they used to have lions and tigers imported and have them fight bears. The bears would slaughter the lions and tigers every time.
puts into perspective how much sheer insane balls wolverines have.
Speaking of bears, I always liked the Giant Short-faced Bear from the Ice Age.
I was watching a documentary on megafauna and these things came up. One thing I remember about them is that they found rare groups of human remains in Alaska and Western Canada that go back quite a ways. However, right about when this bear went extinct, they suddenly find human remains all over the Americas. It is likely that this bear was the one thing keeping humans out of the Americas. Bad ass.
Dude, go back a few pages and read what I wrote about the guy who tried to have a cage-match with a chimp. It's a good (if disturbing) story.
And that was a chimp. A gorilla is about five times larger. Granted, I think gorillas have about half the attitude that a chimp has and that does make a difference - gorillas are big but gentle, chimps are small and have the capacity to be extremely mean.
Why do people have some sort of idea that chimpanzees and other primates are powered by magic? They're made of meat and bone just like every other animal on the planet including humans. An orangutan can lift 500 lbs; a human can lift multi-thousand pound cars and helicopters. People talk about monkeys being able to do one finger pull ups, but so can humans. We survived over a million years where our best technology was a stick with a rock at the end. And during that time we drove entire species extinct that were bigger and badder than the Gorilla.
I was watching a documentary on megafauna and these things came up. One thing I remember about them is that they found rare groups of human remains in Alaska and Western Canada that go back quite a ways. However, right about when this bear went extinct, they suddenly find human remains all over the Americas. It is likely that this bear was the one thing keeping humans out of the Americas. Bad ass.
Eg, 2000 lbs bears that went exinct as soon as we move onto the continent.
Because I realized this thread needs more tarsiers.
I'm disappointed in this thread. This is the only mention to tarsiers? They are easily the coolest animal ever. They are the William Wallace's of the Animal Kingdom. They'll kill themselves rather than be taken captive.
How can you not love such adorable creatures?
Gorillas are ok too, because their latin name is Gorilla gorilla, which is easy to remember.
Posts
That video freaked me the fuck out. That's sci-fi movie shit right there. It literally MORPHS INTO A ROCK.
I'll have to post some videos when I get home, but I went to the New England Aquarium and saw my nominee for coolest animal ever - THE CUTTLEFISH.
I kept flipping the camera screen at it, and watching it, in REAL TIME, light up like Las Vegas to scare itself away.
Right turn, Clyde.
no it doesn't
seriously though otters are awesome
i don't know what this means.
Clyde was treated like a human by the rest of the cast. They even went to him for advice.
Theres no way you could fight a gorilla, youd have a better chance against a lion. You'd be hard pressed to beat a gorilla if it let you take the first swing and you were allowed to use a Morning Star.
Also, my mom saved all our schoolwork from when my brothers and I were in elementary school. Looking back on my K-4th Grade stuff, I was very very serious about being an "Otter Trainer" when I grew up.
Where did I go wrong.
How have you not seen that movie Eddy? It's a classic.
Edit: Also building gigantic robots.
Either way, before I was enlightened to how cool Octopuses were by this thread, I've always had a liking for polar bears.
No specific reason, aside from them being pretty cool. Haha, get it? Cold weather? Priceless!
He looks pretty chill in that picture.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kB6vgZi99gw
Because gorillas have intense emotions, apparently, maybe it's harder to drive them away when they're pissed, whereas great cats are occasionally repelled by damage to facial organs.
I suppose it doesn't matter whether a strike from their limb disembowels you or collapses your chest cavity though.
A lion will fuck you up, but unless you get caught in it's jaws or it's standing on you (both are real possibilites of course), you can run like hell and try to hide. When running away it's either got to jump on you or catch you in it's teeth.
A gorilla can grab your arm and pull it out of it's socket, WHILE biting you.
Tigers: My favorite for a number of reasons, or so I thought until a couple years ago. Then I realized it was for one reason above all others:
Yeah, I told myself it was because how majestic they were, great hunters, beautiful fur, being cool in general, while subconsciously I just wanted to have a Hobbes of my own.
Record-setting human peak athletes reach about 27 mph.
You cannot run from a lion. You might, if you are pumped on adrenaline and the gorilla is tired or weak, be able to run from a gorilla for a short time.
And that was a chimp. A gorilla is about five times larger. Granted, I think gorillas have about half the attitude that a chimp has and that does make a difference - gorillas are big but gentle, chimps are small and have the capacity to be extremely mean.
However, for all our would-be gorilla gladiators (not talking about EM)... how exactly are you going to damage it? This is assuming this is a fist fight and the human doesn't have a machine gun, obviously. I've done enough work with gorilla/primate skulls to tell you that punching it in the face isn't going to do a damn thing other than put your arms right next to its massive fangs. Punching it in the chest/stomach is going to do even less because they have what looks like a huge beer gut...made of solid muscle. So, how are you going to hurt it? Attack its gigantic arms (which are strong enough to support its entire weight all day - gorillas walk on their knuckles)? Do a sweep kick to its 80-pound legs?
i think you're probably fucked if you have a shotgun and you get charged by a gorilla
my point is, lions are more dangerous because they are specifically evolved to hunt and kill their prey - which includes primates.
frankly that means that you're extremely dead either way.
You are not going to reach record speeds or even near record speeds. You are going to reach possibly strong human speeds. What I can find is that the average 18 year old can run about 15 miles per hour over a short difference.
Still, I say a pissed-off gorilla is more dangerous, simply because a gorilla can grab you and hold on to you. Which, I know a lion has claws for that purpose, but I'd say it'd be easier to escape a big cat's grip (which would be very difficult) than a full-grown gorilla's (which would probably be impossible).
But, as you said, you're deader than dogshit either way, it's just a matter of how.
EDIT:
Well, one of them.
EDIT 2: Because I realized this thread needs more tarsiers.
Of course, they're adorable, so I wouldn't really be afraid of one.
"Oh look a cuddly wuddly bear ohhh he soo cute....ARRRRGH GOD MY PANCREAS AND SPINE ARE OUTSIDE MY BODY!"
you could see his skull. i was not aware that the scalp was that thick a layer of flesh, but there was a good inch of stuff visible in the cross section.
his ankle was mostly gone, connected to his leg by a few strands of flesh and two bones, one of which was mostly splintered
his back was a mess of deep gouges and bloody craters, some of which were bleeding profusely even in the hospital after treatment
i'm pretty sure he lived, although he wasn't happy about it.
bears are not cute. they are also more dangerous than pretty much any land predator in the world - polar bears, grizzly bears and brown bears, that is. black bears are probably comparable to gorillas or great cats in terms of how dangerous they are.
They may be adorable, but I nearly pissed myself thinking of how close that photographer got to a GOD DAMNED BEAR.
@ Evil Multifarious: I've only been in bear country (hiking) a handful of times, and only seen one at a distance a couple of times. They seemed to stay away if we made noise. It makes me feel better thinking about bear victims if I assume they were trying to be close to a bear.
Still scary though.
Black bears, on the other hand, will fucking eat you.
And they're also much better at sneaking than their larger cousins. Think about that for a minute--stealth bears.
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Unfortunately, Youtube and Google combined give me NOTHING, so all I have is this: a clip from one of said shows, that has one good Grizzly charge, and a drawn out re-enactment. Oh! And shiny graphics!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N2qYfCOxEYQ&feature=PlayList&p=A6A09A995338D069&index=22
But never fear, humans! We have friends in the sky!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OTr0qkC5sZw
3DS FC: 4699-5714-8940 Playing Pokemon, add me! Ho, SATAN!
They had a discussion about bears on QI. Apparently, during the 1800s, they used to have lions and tigers imported and have them fight bears. The bears would slaughter the lions and tigers every time.
puts into perspective how much sheer insane balls wolverines have.
I was watching a documentary on megafauna and these things came up. One thing I remember about them is that they found rare groups of human remains in Alaska and Western Canada that go back quite a ways. However, right about when this bear went extinct, they suddenly find human remains all over the Americas. It is likely that this bear was the one thing keeping humans out of the Americas. Bad ass.
3DS FC: 4699-5714-8940 Playing Pokemon, add me! Ho, SATAN!
Why do people have some sort of idea that chimpanzees and other primates are powered by magic? They're made of meat and bone just like every other animal on the planet including humans. An orangutan can lift 500 lbs; a human can lift multi-thousand pound cars and helicopters. People talk about monkeys being able to do one finger pull ups, but so can humans. We survived over a million years where our best technology was a stick with a rock at the end. And during that time we drove entire species extinct that were bigger and badder than the Gorilla.
Eg, 2000 lbs bears that went exinct as soon as we move onto the continent.
I'm disappointed in this thread. This is the only mention to tarsiers? They are easily the coolest animal ever. They are the William Wallace's of the Animal Kingdom. They'll kill themselves rather than be taken captive.
How can you not love such adorable creatures?
Gorillas are ok too, because their latin name is Gorilla gorilla, which is easy to remember.