At Johns Hopkins university thieves lose their hand, then their lives

NebulousQ

I am glad we can all agree on when it is necessary to flip out with a ninja-sword.

BYToady

You don't fuck with a man's midterm after his 12th redbull.

[Deleted User]

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Grey Ghost

Why would a dude come back to the same house a few days later and try to take more shit

I'm not sure the same dude did these two things

Charles Kinbote

like a PS1

man that shit is worth a pinky at most

the PS3 just dropped in price too so the lacerations may have been a bit overboard for that

there's a reason we have Manufacturer's Suggested Mutilations, people

i don't know what i'm doing

T. J. Nutty Nub

Aneurhythmia wrote: »

Koshian wrote: »

T.J. Nutty Nub wrote: »

hahahahaha

burglar deserved it

yes, he deserved a gruesome death for stealing a playstation

Read his sig.

That sig is meant ironically

He did apparently provoke them

Faricazy

World as Myth wrote: »

if someone stole my laptop I'd be beyond fucked

I'd chop a bitch's hand off for sure

if the thesis is on that laptop

the arm is coming off

Charles Kinbote

T.J. Nutty Nub wrote: »

Aneurhythmia wrote: »

Koshian wrote: »

T.J. Nutty Nub wrote: »

hahahahaha

burglar deserved it

yes, he deserved a gruesome death for stealing a playstation

Read his sig.

That sig is meant ironically

He did apparently provoke them

yeah, according to them

I gotta question the kinda guy that sees four dudes in front of him, one with a sword and goes "I think a good lunge would be my best option here"

World as Myth

T.J. Nutty Nub wrote: »

Aneurhythmia wrote: »

Koshian wrote: »

T.J. Nutty Nub wrote: »

hahahahaha

burglar deserved it

yes, he deserved a gruesome death for stealing a playstation

Read his sig.

That sig is meant ironically

He did apparently provoke them

let's be honest -- when the cops ask "did this man you killed provoke you in any way"

you aren't going to say "uhhhhmm well now that you mention it, no, he didn't!"

Bogey

Faricazy wrote: »

man

he really had a weapons-grade sword?

those are not cheap by any stretch of imagination

Clearly this wasn't a cheapy model that the guy picked up at the swap-meet with some ninja stars. :P

Melding

people get shot all the time in B and E, you could get shot the next time you break into someone's house, you should be lucky to have the story of being attacked by a kid with a samurai sword.

World as Myth

Melding wrote: »

people get shot all the time in B and E, you could get shot the next time you break into someone's house, you should be lucky to have the story of being attacked by a kid with a samurai sword.

(he died)

Bogey

Shankill Butcher wrote: »

I gotta question the kinda guy that sees four dudes in front of him, one with a sword and goes "I think a good lunge would be my best option here"

I bet it was more of a lunge towards a window or back door.

PiptheFair

World as Myth wrote: »

Melding wrote: »

people get shot all the time in B and E, you could get shot the next time you break into someone's house, you should be lucky to have the story of being attacked by a kid with a samurai sword.

(he died)

he's gonna be popular in hell

not too many dudes get killed with swords nowadays

Melding

I was about to ask that. I didn't read the article. Oh well, At least someone gets to tell the story, and hey, maybe that kid is scared for life.

BYToady

Pretty sure Baltimore frowns on swords too. Can't really claim its decorative if you've killed a man with it.

PiptheFair

Bogey wrote: »

Shankill Butcher wrote: »

I gotta question the kinda guy that sees four dudes in front of him, one with a sword and goes "I think a good lunge would be my best option here"

I bet it was more of a lunge towards a window or back door.

yes turning his back to them allowing his hand to be cut off?

NebulousQ

BYToady wrote: »

Pretty sure Baltimore frowns on swords too. Can't really claim its decorative if you've killed a man with it.

It's even more decorative now. It has a story to go with it. Those are the best living space decorations.

Charles Kinbote

Bogey wrote: »

Shankill Butcher wrote: »

I gotta question the kinda guy that sees four dudes in front of him, one with a sword and goes "I think a good lunge would be my best option here"

I bet it was more of a lunge towards a window or back door.

yeah but the article says he "'lunged' at the students"

the fact that the dude had multiple wounds and got his hand of all things cut off, I dunno

it just reeks of "kids see a dude breaking in, overreact, realize they fucked up, agree to say that he lunged at them"

Melding

Maybe he was a demon lord of narthirjf'xyism, and that kid fucking saved the world in a climatic battle no one will ever believe.

Nah, for once Shank might be right.

FirmSkater

Bogey wrote: »

The other 3 friends were armed with a Darth Maul lightsaber, Klingon Bat'leth, and a Naruto headband.

I giggled.

Aneurhythmia

PiptheFair wrote: »

Bogey wrote: »

Shankill Butcher wrote: »

I gotta question the kinda guy that sees four dudes in front of him, one with a sword and goes "I think a good lunge would be my best option here"

I bet it was more of a lunge towards a window or back door.

yes turning his back to them allowing his hand to be cut off?

If his arm was at his side, maybe. Lots of different angles a sword could be coming at you.

I'd wager that he put his arm in front of him as an involuntary, defensive reaction and lost his hand.

Pony

Bogey wrote: »

Faricazy wrote: »

man

he really had a weapons-grade sword?

those are not cheap by any stretch of imagination

Clearly this wasn't a cheapy model that the guy picked up at the swap-meet with some ninja stars. :P

i got crappy stainless steel decoration things like that

pretty sure if i ever actually swung em at someone they'd shatter like glass

plus they are blunt

the hell was this dude doing with a katana that was actually sharp and able to chop a dude without breaking into pieces?

dang man

who even buys shit like that

NebulousQ

Also the would-be thief is dead and unable to contradict their story. Morals/ethics aside, killing the thief is the best way for the "home defender" to go about doing things for the reason I just mentioned.

Faricazy

BYToady wrote: »

Pretty sure Baltimore frowns on swords too. Can't really claim its decorative if you've killed a man with it.

decorative swords will not cut clean through an arm. stabbing, yeah, but no way will they dismember.

if it was really a clean cut, then it must have been an expensive, weapons-grade sword

i'm not even sure how legal those are to keep

in new york i'm sure you would have to have some sort of documentation

FirmSkater

All I know is that if you unsheathe it you have to put it away wet with blood. This guy should have been paying attention to whose house he was robbing.

Antimatter

Pony wrote: »

Bogey wrote: »

Faricazy wrote: »

man

he really had a weapons-grade sword?

those are not cheap by any stretch of imagination

Clearly this wasn't a cheapy model that the guy picked up at the swap-meet with some ninja stars. :P

i got crappy stainless steel decoration things like that

pretty sure if i ever actually swung em at someone they'd shatter like glass

plus they are blunt

the hell was this dude doing with a katana that was actually sharp and able to chop a dude without breaking into pieces?

dang man

who even buys shit like that

Aneurhythmia

I bought this one ninja sword at the medieval fair made of Damascus steel so I can sharpen it 'til it can split a hair. It's also engraved with a tiger, because that has the strongest ninja spirit of any animal, because dragons are extinct.

PiptheFair

Aneurhythmia wrote: »

PiptheFair wrote: »

Bogey wrote: »

Shankill Butcher wrote: »

I gotta question the kinda guy that sees four dudes in front of him, one with a sword and goes "I think a good lunge would be my best option here"

I bet it was more of a lunge towards a window or back door.

yes turning his back to them allowing his hand to be cut off?

If his arm was at his side, maybe. Lots of different angles a sword could be coming at you.

I'd wager that he put his arm in front of him as an involuntary, defensive reaction and lost his hand.

this is the likely scenario yes

Melding

NebulousQ wrote: »

Also the would-be thief is dead and unable to contradict their story. Morals/ethics aside, killing the thief is the best way for the "home defender" to go about doing things for the reason I just mentioned.

Plus you can't get sued after.

Grey Ghost

Pony wrote: »

Bogey wrote: »

Faricazy wrote: »

man

he really had a weapons-grade sword?

those are not cheap by any stretch of imagination

Clearly this wasn't a cheapy model that the guy picked up at the swap-meet with some ninja stars. :P

i got crappy stainless steel decoration things like that

pretty sure if i ever actually swung em at someone they'd shatter like glass

plus they are blunt

the hell was this dude doing with a katana that was actually sharp and able to chop a dude without breaking into pieces?

dang man

who even buys shit like that

The student is actually Hattori Hanzo

Grey Ghost

Aneurhythmia wrote: »

I bought this one ninja sword at the medieval fair made of Damascus steel so I can sharpen it 'til it can split a hair. It's also engraved with a tiger, because that has the strongest ninja spirit of any animal, because dragons are extinct.

Quality post here

Faricazy

FirmSkater wrote: »

All I know is that if you unsheathe it you have to put it away wet with blood. This guy should have been paying attention to whose house he was robbing.

i thought you had to clean the sword before putting it away

wipe that shit on your kimono

[Deleted User]

The user and all related content has been deleted.

Charles Kinbote

and I mean let's be honest

you take a dumb college kid, inject him with adrenaline, put a sword in his hands and his friends around him, he's probably gonna operating with a bit of a hair trigger

the fact that he even owns a proper sword-weapon probably means that he fancies himself the kinda guy who is ready to use it "if it becomes necessary"

NebulousQ

Faricazy wrote: »

i thought you had to clean the sword before putting it away

wipe that shit on your kimono

But the blood might stain the silk!

BYToady

I bet he got some crappy 100 dollar stainless steel sword and sharpened it himself to be more cooler.

Faricazy

BYToady wrote: »

I bet he got some crappy 100 dollar stainless steel sword and sharpened it himself to be more cooler.

doesn't work like that

seriously it takes a lot to cut through bone

NebulousQ

more cooler is definately the way to go

Grey Ghost

BYToady wrote: »

I bet he got some crappy 100 dollar stainless steel sword and sharpened it himself to be more cooler.

If it's that crappy then it won't even sharpen

This dude dropped some cash on this thing