As was foretold, we've added advertisements to the forums! If you have questions, or if you encounter any bugs, please visit this thread: https://forums.penny-arcade.com/discussion/240191/forum-advertisement-faq-and-reports-thread/
Options

Downside to masturbation

plantersplanters Registered User regular
edited January 2007 in Help / Advice Forum
So I heard before that everytime your body produces the best sperm and in the future your children would not be normal. Is that true or is it total bs?

planters on

Posts

  • Options
    CrossBusterCrossBuster Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Sounds like total BS.

    CrossBuster on
    penguins.png
  • Options
    SmasherSmasher Starting to get dizzy Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Totally false.

    Smasher on
  • Options
    Rear Admiral ChocoRear Admiral Choco I wanna be an owl, Jerry! Owl York CityRegistered User regular
    edited January 2007
    I'm not totally sure what is being said here.

    Are you saying that every time you masturbate the sperm become lesser quality?

    Because yeah, that is BS.

    Rear Admiral Choco on
  • Options
    Magus`Magus` The fun has been DOUBLED! Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    BS. If you don't do it, your body will.

    Or so I'm told.

    Magus` on
  • Options
    SOLUTESOLUTE __BANNED USERS regular
    edited January 2007
    Magus` wrote:
    BS. If you don't do it, your body will.

    Or so I'm told.

    Wet dreams. Exactly.


    They have no chance to survive make your time.

    SOLUTE on
  • Options
    CrossBusterCrossBuster Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Who the hell told you this? Your grandmother? Your priest?

    CrossBuster on
    penguins.png
  • Options
    Sir Red of the MantiSir Red of the Manti Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    If this were true, the current generation would be far from normal. Actually, this theory may be going somewhere...
    But yea, sounds like a common myth.

    Sir Red of the Manti on
  • Options
    ThanatosThanatos Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Sperm don't live forever. Your body has to get rid of them after they're produced. They're either ejaculated out, or re-absorbed into your body (this is why you can pinch off the vas deferens without any serious side effects; the sperm are just reabsorbed into your body).

    So, whatever sperm you ejaculate out while masturbating were destined for death, anyhow.

    Thanatos on
  • Options
    AbsoluteZeroAbsoluteZero The new film by Quentin Koopantino Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Thanatos wrote:
    Sperm don't live forever. Your body has to get rid of them after they're produced. They're either ejaculated out, or re-absorbed into your body (this is why you can pinch off the vas deferens without any serious side effects; the sperm are just reabsorbed into your body).

    So, whatever sperm you ejaculate out while masturbating were destined for death, anyhow.

    And even if you were having sex every single time instead of masturbating, only one sperm would make it to the egg, maybe.

    So yeah. Complete and total BS. It's a better myth than the ol "you'll go blind" or "hairy palms" stuff of the past.

    AbsoluteZero on
    cs6f034fsffl.jpg
  • Options
    DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Yes, it's true. I masturbated so much in my youth that by the time I accidentally impregnated a girl, she gave birth to an unholy coagulation of human tissue and automobile parts. We call him Roto.*





    *Actually, the exact opposite of this entire paragraph is the real truth. Well, except the part about masturbating so much. That was true.




    Next time your priest tells you this, tell him to go fuck himself. Both ironic and poetic.

    Drez on
    Switch: SW-7690-2320-9238Steam/PSN/Xbox: Drezdar
  • Options
    ThanatosThanatos Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    In fact, masturbating too little substantially increases your chances of getting prostate cancer later in life.

    Thanatos on
  • Options
    DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    I doubt I will ever get prostate cancer if that is true. Still, that's quite a bogus claim, that you weaken the actual quality of your sperm through chronic masturbation. Your partner may not have a massive load waiting for her - your overall "load strength" may weaken or diminish if you constantly masturbate - but your genes don't dilute because you jerk off 50 times a week. That's just not possible from everything we know of human biology.

    Drez on
    Switch: SW-7690-2320-9238Steam/PSN/Xbox: Drezdar
  • Options
    ThanatosThanatos Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Drez wrote:
    I doubt I will ever get prostate cancer if that is true. Still, that's quite a bogus claim, that you weaken the actual quality of your sperm. Your partner may not have a massive load waiting for her - the overall "load strength" may weaken or diminish if you constantly masturbate, but your genes don't dilute because you jerk off 50 times a week. That's just not possible from everything we know of human biology.
    Well, yeah, masturbating will, of course, reduce your sperm count for a couple of days, while your body replenishes it. But that's just a couple of days.

    Thanatos on
  • Options
    DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Thanatos wrote:
    Drez wrote:
    I doubt I will ever get prostate cancer if that is true. Still, that's quite a bogus claim, that you weaken the actual quality of your sperm. Your partner may not have a massive load waiting for her - the overall "load strength" may weaken or diminish if you constantly masturbate, but your genes don't dilute because you jerk off 50 times a week. That's just not possible from everything we know of human biology.
    Well, yeah, masturbating will, of course, reduce your sperm count for a couple of days, while your body replenishes it. But that's just a couple of days.
    Well, if you do nothing but sit at home and masturbate all day every day, you'll have a consistently low sperm count. But that's just splitting...hairs. And if you stop, you'll be good to go in a few days.

    Drez on
    Switch: SW-7690-2320-9238Steam/PSN/Xbox: Drezdar
  • Options
    ThanatosThanatos Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Drez wrote:
    Thanatos wrote:
    Drez wrote:
    I doubt I will ever get prostate cancer if that is true. Still, that's quite a bogus claim, that you weaken the actual quality of your sperm. Your partner may not have a massive load waiting for her - the overall "load strength" may weaken or diminish if you constantly masturbate, but your genes don't dilute because you jerk off 50 times a week. That's just not possible from everything we know of human biology.
    Well, yeah, masturbating will, of course, reduce your sperm count for a couple of days, while your body replenishes it. But that's just a couple of days.
    Well, if you do nothing but sit at home and masturbate all day every day, you'll have a consistently low sperm count. But that's just splitting...hairs. And if you stop, you'll be good to go in a few days.
    Of course. But if you sit around the house and masturbate constantly for a year, then stop for two days, your sperm count is right back up again. Again, no permanent damage.

    Thanatos on
  • Options
    DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Thanatos wrote:
    Drez wrote:
    Thanatos wrote:
    Drez wrote:
    I doubt I will ever get prostate cancer if that is true. Still, that's quite a bogus claim, that you weaken the actual quality of your sperm. Your partner may not have a massive load waiting for her - the overall "load strength" may weaken or diminish if you constantly masturbate, but your genes don't dilute because you jerk off 50 times a week. That's just not possible from everything we know of human biology.
    Well, yeah, masturbating will, of course, reduce your sperm count for a couple of days, while your body replenishes it. But that's just a couple of days.
    Well, if you do nothing but sit at home and masturbate all day every day, you'll have a consistently low sperm count. But that's just splitting...hairs. And if you stop, you'll be good to go in a few days.
    Of course. But if you sit around the house and masturbate constantly for a year, then stop for two days, your sperm count is right back up again. Again, no permanent damage.
    Right. Potentially some psychological damage, but definitely no physical damage.

    Drez on
    Switch: SW-7690-2320-9238Steam/PSN/Xbox: Drezdar
  • Options
    ViolentChemistryViolentChemistry __BANNED USERS regular
    edited January 2007
    Drez wrote:
    Thanatos wrote:
    Drez wrote:
    Thanatos wrote:
    Drez wrote:
    I doubt I will ever get prostate cancer if that is true. Still, that's quite a bogus claim, that you weaken the actual quality of your sperm. Your partner may not have a massive load waiting for her - the overall "load strength" may weaken or diminish if you constantly masturbate, but your genes don't dilute because you jerk off 50 times a week. That's just not possible from everything we know of human biology.
    Well, yeah, masturbating will, of course, reduce your sperm count for a couple of days, while your body replenishes it. But that's just a couple of days.
    Well, if you do nothing but sit at home and masturbate all day every day, you'll have a consistently low sperm count. But that's just splitting...hairs. And if you stop, you'll be good to go in a few days.
    Of course. But if you sit around the house and masturbate constantly for a year, then stop for two days, your sperm count is right back up again. Again, no permanent damage.
    Right. Potentially some psychological damage, but definitely no physical damage.
    As long as you're using lube. Otherwise a year straight of masturbating may well chafe your dinger right off. Or at least leave it covered in puss-oozy scabs.

    ViolentChemistry on
  • Options
    SarcastroSarcastro Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    planters wrote:
    So I heard before that everytime your body produces the best sperm and in the future your children would not be normal. Is that true or is it total bs?

    This sounds like a twist of something that could be true, the theory that a man's sperm changes depending on the state of his body at the time.

    Basically the theory is that sperm is kind of like a long term situational forecast, in that your children are more likely to be given traits that will help them survive the first four or five years. In going with that flow, the sperm you make now would produce healthier children when used right now, then say if you froze it and used it fifty years from now, because the environmental conditions they were designed to survive would be slightly altered.

    Unlike women, who get all thier eggs just before birth, men make thier special sauce on the fly. Nature's critical update patch, if you will.

    Sarcastro on
  • Options
    DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Drez wrote:
    Thanatos wrote:
    Drez wrote:
    Thanatos wrote:
    Drez wrote:
    I doubt I will ever get prostate cancer if that is true. Still, that's quite a bogus claim, that you weaken the actual quality of your sperm. Your partner may not have a massive load waiting for her - the overall "load strength" may weaken or diminish if you constantly masturbate, but your genes don't dilute because you jerk off 50 times a week. That's just not possible from everything we know of human biology.
    Well, yeah, masturbating will, of course, reduce your sperm count for a couple of days, while your body replenishes it. But that's just a couple of days.
    Well, if you do nothing but sit at home and masturbate all day every day, you'll have a consistently low sperm count. But that's just splitting...hairs. And if you stop, you'll be good to go in a few days.
    Of course. But if you sit around the house and masturbate constantly for a year, then stop for two days, your sperm count is right back up again. Again, no permanent damage.
    Right. Potentially some psychological damage, but definitely no physical damage.
    As long as you're using lube. Otherwise a year straight of masturbating may well chafe your dinger right off. Or at least leave it covered in puss-oozy scabs.
    Nice edit. Pussy scabs and puss/oozy scabs are...two different things :P. I don't think you can get the former from masturbation. The latter, maybe.

    Anyway, one would assume that a chronic masturbater would be an expert in the art, particularly in not chafing one's own dick off.

    My advice about masturbation (since this is Help/Advice):

    1) Don't yank too hard.
    2) Think happy thoughts. Like Peter Pan. But don't actually think about Peter Pan. Unless that's your thing. Just don't tell me if it is.

    Drez on
    Switch: SW-7690-2320-9238Steam/PSN/Xbox: Drezdar
  • Options
    supabeastsupabeast Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Enjoy masturbating as often as possible while you still can. I'm only 28, and I really wish that I could still manage to jerk off three times a day like I did when I was 21 and drunk most of the time.

    supabeast on
  • Options
    EggyToastEggyToast Jersey CityRegistered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Yeah, there's studies that show that a man can reduce his sperm potency by masturbating more than once every 3 days. However, you don't make retard sperm; you just have less.

    Note that the overall quantity count is also very easy to measure using non-scientific testing. Masturbate every day for a week, and then wait 4-5 days. You'll notice a difference, too.

    EggyToast on
    || Flickr — || PSN: EggyToast
  • Options
    SOLUTESOLUTE __BANNED USERS regular
    edited January 2007
    I wonder how a person could even test the quality of a sperm to see what kind of human it could produce.

    SOLUTE on
  • Options
    Lucky CynicLucky Cynic Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    SOLUTE wrote:
    I wonder how a person could even test the quality of a sperm to see what kind of human it could produce.

    Fertility, like how active the sperm is. If they just waddle around or zip around all over the place. IIRC that is.

    Lucky Cynic on
  • Options
    ViolentChemistryViolentChemistry __BANNED USERS regular
    edited January 2007
    SOLUTE wrote:
    I wonder how a person could even test the quality of a sperm to see what kind of human it could produce.
    They can't. Largely because the "quality of sperm" is far from the only factor involved in such.

    ViolentChemistry on
  • Options
    DarkPrimusDarkPrimus Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    I think a more interesting question would be: How much does one have to masturbate to develop Tennis Player Arm, where one arm is signifigantly more muscular and defined than the other?

    DarkPrimus on
  • Options
    LavaKnightLavaKnight Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Sarcastro wrote:
    planters wrote:
    So I heard before that everytime your body produces the best sperm and in the future your children would not be normal. Is that true or is it total bs?

    This sounds like a twist of something that could be true, the theory that a man's sperm changes depending on the state of his body at the time.

    That is kind of interesting on a medical level. I don't know anything about what factors go into producing sperm, but it's interesting nonetheless.

    Actually, it sounds more like a spiritual thing, which is not to say that it's any less credible.

    LavaKnight on
  • Options
    SilkyNumNutsSilkyNumNuts Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    DarkPrimus wrote:
    I think a more interesting question would be: How much does one have to masturbate to develop Tennis Player Arm, where one arm is signifigantly more muscular and defined than the other?
    My right arm is far more developed, but I masturbate with my left... A conundrum!

    SilkyNumNuts on
  • Options
    DeusfauxDeusfaux Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    who the hell is masturbating with their entire ARM anyhow?!

    Deusfaux on
  • Options
    DelzhandDelzhand Hard to miss. Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    comic.php?date=06122003

    Delzhand on
  • Options
    DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    SOLUTE wrote:
    I wonder how a person could even test the quality of a sperm to see what kind of human it could produce.

    It's called a "taste test." At least, that's what I tell women.

    How did no one make this joke last night? I mean, this is H/A, granted, but come on. That was so obvious.

    Drez on
    Switch: SW-7690-2320-9238Steam/PSN/Xbox: Drezdar
  • Options
    Kewop DecamKewop Decam Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    SOLUTE wrote:
    I wonder how a person could even test the quality of a sperm to see what kind of human it could produce.
    They can't. Largely because the "quality of sperm" is far from the only factor involved in such.

    Yea, like the biggest thing male sperm can do other than start the human creation process is decide what sex the child will be.

    Kewop Decam on
    pasigfa7.jpg
  • Options
    TalousTalous Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Sarcastro wrote:
    planters wrote:
    So I heard before that everytime your body produces the best sperm and in the future your children would not be normal. Is that true or is it total bs?

    This sounds like a twist of something that could be true, the theory that a man's sperm changes depending on the state of his body at the time.


    Look! It's Lamark back from the dead!

    How about them giraffes?

    Edit: Also I'm no fucking scientist, but "theory" is not the word you're looking for. You mean to say "idea". A theory is a hypothesis which has actually been tested to be true in quite a few experiments.

    Talous on
    Glampgrotz - Black Orc - Ulthuan TSM
    SS13 Rules Post
  • Options
    CrossBusterCrossBuster Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    This really sounds like anti-masturbation propaganda that's slightly more sophisticated than "God hates it" or "you'll go blind."

    If you don't know very much about biology, it sort of makes intuitive sense, which is why it needs to be debunked early.

    CrossBuster on
    penguins.png
  • Options
    NateVaderNateVader Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Sarcastro wrote:
    planters wrote:
    So I heard before that everytime your body produces the best sperm and in the future your children would not be normal. Is that true or is it total bs?

    This sounds like a twist of something that could be true, the theory that a man's sperm changes depending on the state of his body at the time.

    Basically the theory is that sperm is kind of like a long term situational forecast, in that your children are more likely to be given traits that will help them survive the first four or five years. In going with that flow, the sperm you make now would produce healthier children when used right now, then say if you froze it and used it fifty years from now, because the environmental conditions they were designed to survive would be slightly altered.

    Unlike women, who get all thier eggs just before birth, men make thier special sauce on the fly. Nature's critical update patch, if you will.

    Biologically speaking, that's the biggest load of crap I've ever heard and not a 'theory' based on any remotely scientific evidence. Meiosis(which determines which genes go to which sperm) occurs the same way your entire life and all your genes end up in one sperm or another, it's totally random, no genes get left out because they're not desirable.

    NateVader on
    steam_sig.png
  • Options
    HiroconHirocon Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    NateVader wrote:
    Meiosis(which determines which genes go to which sperm) occurs the same way your entire life and all your genes end up in one sperm or another, it's totally random, no genes get left out because they're not desirable.

    This is not necessarily true.
    Sperm declines in quality as men age, swimming more slowly and becoming more genetically defective...

    Men usually started to have an abnormal DNA fragmentation index at the age of 56...

    So apparently sperm quality in men has a tendency to decrease with age. This may be a side effect of aging in general, or it may be the cumulative effect of decades of masturbation. Probably the former.

    Hirocon on
  • Options
    TalousTalous Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Well that article says that "fragmentation" generally starts to occur at around 56. I'm pretty goddamn sure it's going to be a good many years before fathering children at that age becomes a norm.

    Talous on
    Glampgrotz - Black Orc - Ulthuan TSM
    SS13 Rules Post
  • Options
    FeralFeral MEMETICHARIZARD interior crocodile alligator ⇔ ǝɹʇɐǝɥʇ ǝᴉʌoɯ ʇǝloɹʌǝɥɔ ɐ ǝʌᴉɹp ᴉRegistered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Hirocon wrote:
    NateVader wrote:
    Meiosis(which determines which genes go to which sperm) occurs the same way your entire life and all your genes end up in one sperm or another, it's totally random, no genes get left out because they're not desirable.

    This is not necessarily true.
    Sperm declines in quality as men age, swimming more slowly and becoming more genetically defective...

    Men usually started to have an abnormal DNA fragmentation index at the age of 56...

    So apparently sperm quality in men has a tendency to decrease with age. This may be a side effect of aging in general, or it may be the cumulative effect of decades of masturbation. Probably the former.

    Exactly.
    The dominant theory for why sperm loses "quality" later in life is that random mutations during meiosis introduce duplication errors. Meiosis (and these mutations) would occur whether you masturbate or not.
    So in other words the notion of "sperm quality" isn't silly, but thinking that masturbation would reduce sperm quality is silly. (If anything, masturbation might improve sperm quality for the same reason it reduces prostate cancer risk - by flushing carcinogens out from the reproductive system. But that's just conjecture.)

    Feral on
    every person who doesn't like an acquired taste always seems to think everyone who likes it is faking it. it should be an official fallacy.

    the "no true scotch man" fallacy.
  • Options
    DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Talous wrote:
    Sarcastro wrote:
    planters wrote:
    So I heard before that everytime your body produces the best sperm and in the future your children would not be normal. Is that true or is it total bs?

    This sounds like a twist of something that could be true, the theory that a man's sperm changes depending on the state of his body at the time.


    Look! It's Lamark back from the dead!

    How about them giraffes?

    Edit: Also I'm no fucking scientist, but "theory" is not the word you're looking for. You mean to say "idea". A theory is a hypothesis which has actually been tested to be true in quite a few experiments.

    Technically, that's "fact." "Fact" is merely well-tested, accepted "theory" that has yet to be unproven. A "theory" is a well-tested "hypothesis" that has yet to be unproven but is not yet accepted as "fact." A "hypothesis" is an unproven idea that has not been sufficiently tested to be considered even a potential "fact," and so it is not yet considered "theory" - there is not yet enough evidence that it can ever be a "fact." And "bullshit" is is a "hypothesis" which has been proven to be false or which people manufacture to some ill end, like this nonsense about masturbation.

    Drez on
    Switch: SW-7690-2320-9238Steam/PSN/Xbox: Drezdar
Sign In or Register to comment.