The new forums will be named Coin Return (based on the most recent vote)! You can check on the status and timeline of the transition to the new forums here.
The Guiding Principles and New Rules document is now in effect.

The Spray-On Condom

CatcherCatcher Registered User regular
edited March 2007 in Games and Technology
Since it is technology I thought this thread would be appropriate. I think the name speaks for itself.

http://www.gizmag.com/go/6534/

When the Journeyman testifies a fateless man believes. He can send you into paradise or bring you to your knees.
Catcher on
«1345

Posts

  • ViscountalphaViscountalpha The pen is mightier than the sword http://youtu.be/G_sBOsh-vyIRegistered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Catcher wrote: »
    Since it is technology I thought this thread would be appropriate. I think the name speaks for itself.

    http://www.gizmag.com/go/6534/


    I'm not sure I'd want to test this.

    "IT BURNS!!! FOR THE LOVE OF MY PENIS IT BURNS!"

    uh ya, no.

    Viscountalpha on
  • SurikoSuriko AustraliaRegistered User regular
    edited February 2007
    I'd be gobsmacked if this idea hadn't been tried before, albeit with less success than this project is (seemingly) having.

    Sounds like a great concept... but yeah, wouldn't want to be a tester.

    Suriko on
  • SquashuaSquashua __BANNED USERS regular
    edited February 2007
    Dude.

    Only one word of advice.

    SHAVE BEFORE USE.

    Squashua on
  • EinhanderEinhander __BANNED USERS regular
    edited February 2007
    I was under the assumption that the majority of condom breakages occur because the user failed to put it on correctly, not allowing enough room for the ejaculated sperm, which then breaks the condom.

    So, if I spray a coat of latex on my penis, where is my sperm going to go?

    Einhander on
  • AydrAydr Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    ...Technology has certainly come a long way.

    Though apparently in directions I'm pretty sure nobody was thinking when they speculated on what advancements the 21st century would bring.

    Aydr on
  • randombattlerandombattle Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Who wakes up in the morning and thinks.


    Gee I think the world needs spray on condoms.

    randombattle on
    itsstupidbutidontcare2.gif
    I never asked for this!
  • SurikoSuriko AustraliaRegistered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Who wakes up in the morning and thinks.


    Gee I think the world needs spray on condoms.

    I have.



    Don't look at me like that.

    Suriko on
  • Death of RatsDeath of Rats Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    How exactly is this any more handy that a normal condom?

    I'll stick to "pull and pray and punch" thank you very much.

    Death of Rats on
    No I don't.
  • Liquid HellzLiquid Hellz Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Can't wait to strap into this.

    Liquid Hellz on
    What I do for a living:
    Home Inspection and Wind Mitigation
    http://www.FairWindInspections.com/
  • Cynic JesterCynic Jester Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    How exactly is this any more handy that a normal condom?

    I'll stick to "punch and pull and punch and pray and punch" thank you very much.

    Fixed.

    Cynic Jester on
  • ZombiemamboZombiemambo Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Just wait until you mistake it for deodorant. Bet they didn't take that into account.

    Zombiemambo on
    JKKaAGp.png
  • AydrAydr Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    ...Is it just me, or is that diagram picture suggesting that homosexual and heterosexual spray nozzles are somehow different?

    Aydr on
  • EinhanderEinhander __BANNED USERS regular
    edited February 2007
    I guess the main benefit is it's a much quicker method, but the drawbacks would be carrying around a giant object that looks a lot like some kind of modified dildo. Nothing like getting a girl on the bed and pulling that out with a smile, and having her think it's a Kong Dong.

    Also, yeah, the pubic hair seems like it would cause trouble with a spray-on condom system. I trim, but I don't think I could bring myself to shave. Stubble from my beard on my face is bad enough, I don't want it around my johnson.

    Einhander on
  • CouscousCouscous Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Who wakes up in the morning and thinks.


    Gee I think the world needs spray on condoms.
    Who wakes up in the morning and thinks, "Hey, sliced bread would be a brilliant idea!"

    Couscous on
  • TrenogTrenog Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Who wakes up in the morning and thinks.


    Gee I think the world needs spray on condoms.

    I think that it would be more like this:

    A guy is standing in front of his toilet, morning wood and all, taking a piss. He glances down at his erect penis and thinks to himself. "You know. I spray my underarms when I want to smell nice, and I spray my hair when I want it to stand up. I figure that if I could spray my penis with some kind of aerosol, that the outcome will likely end up with me benefitting. If only I could somehow match this desire to an appropriate market brand..."

    Trenog on
    steam_sig.png
    Malkor wrote: »
    Rolo wrote: »
    opium is all natural shit son

    makes you stronger

    It also makes you immune to time.
    Bama wrote: »
    Two weeks ago, I lost the bulk of my female friends

    She really hates it when you call her that.
    FCD wrote: »
    Ahhh, Orochimaru. Or, as I like to call him, Japanese Pedophile Voldemort.
  • Liquid HellzLiquid Hellz Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Aydr wrote: »
    ...Is it just me, or is that diagram picture suggesting that homosexual and heterosexual spray nozzles are somehow different?

    Maybe your girlfriend will get you the homosexual one because she thinks its pretty.

    Liquid Hellz on
    What I do for a living:
    Home Inspection and Wind Mitigation
    http://www.FairWindInspections.com/
  • Lucky CynicLucky Cynic Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Just wait until you mistake it for deodorant. Bet they didn't take that into account.

    Would make an awesome prank.

    As for the product itself, I can see this being used a lot by the people with latex fetishes than people concerned with birth control. Not to mention that this could very well be hard to find and expensive when compared to a good old fashion condom.

    Lucky Cynic on
  • ZimmydoomZimmydoom Accept no substitutes Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Trenog wrote: »
    Who wakes up in the morning and thinks.


    Gee I think the world needs spray on condoms.

    I think that it would be more like this:

    A guy is standing in front of his toilet, morning wood and all, taking a piss. He glances down at his erect penis and thinks to himself. "You know. I spray my underarms when I want to smell nice, and I spray my hair when I want it to stand up. I figure that if I could spray my penis with some kind of aerosol, that the outcome will likely end up with me benefitting. If only I could somehow match this desire to an appropriate market brand..."

    So, apparently this guy does his best thinking while tilted at a 45' angle?

    Zimmydoom on
    Better-than-birthday-sig!
    Gim wrote: »
    Zimmydoom, Zimmydoom
    Flew away in a balloon
    Had sex with polar bears
    While sitting in a reclining chair
    Now there are Zim-Bear hybrids
    Running around and clawing eyelids
    Watch out, a Zim-Bear is about to have sex with yooooooou!
  • AbsoluteZeroAbsoluteZero The new film by Quentin Koopantino Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Hahaha

    Fuck this. I can only imagine how many potential complications there would be. People have a hard enough time putting a normal condom on.

    AbsoluteZero on
    cs6f034fsffl.jpg
  • TrenogTrenog Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Zimmydoom wrote:
    So, apparently this guy does his best thinking while tilted at a 45' angle?

    Well I'm sure that he knows how to handle himself when he has to take a piss so the 45' angle thing is probably not always applicable.

    Trenog on
    steam_sig.png
    Malkor wrote: »
    Rolo wrote: »
    opium is all natural shit son

    makes you stronger

    It also makes you immune to time.
    Bama wrote: »
    Two weeks ago, I lost the bulk of my female friends

    She really hates it when you call her that.
    FCD wrote: »
    Ahhh, Orochimaru. Or, as I like to call him, Japanese Pedophile Voldemort.
  • ZedroZedro Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Oh yeah, this is definitely history textbook-worthy.

    Zedro on
    sig.pl?Zedro
  • GraviijaGraviija Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    I...I think I'd be a lot more comfortable with the standard condom. Because, like, there's an actual physical barrier there.

    This sounds like a "wishful thinking" birth control device.

    Graviija on
  • fightinfilipinofightinfilipino Angry as Hell #BLMRegistered User regular
    edited February 2007
    this is a much better idea.

    especially watch the demo. it's is slightly NSFW, but so's the thread.

    fightinfilipino on
    ffNewSig.png
    steam | Dokkan: 868846562
  • Caveman PawsCaveman Paws Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Imagine the mistakes and drunken "oops" moments this product would usher in? It's dark, your buzzed, you reach for your trusty spray on "baby be gone" and you grab the wrong spray!

    Edit: Fightinfilipino just won the thread. That actually looks like a cool idea!

    But then I'm sure thats what some folks said about spray on hair back in the day too...

    Caveman Paws on
  • PataPata Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    I'd buy this for the novelty factor alone.

    Pata on
    SRWWSig.pngEpisode 5: Mecha-World, Mecha-nisim, Mecha-beasts
  • EinhanderEinhander __BANNED USERS regular
    edited February 2007
    Hey, I've got an even worse idea!

    So, sperm can die pretty easy from being in a temperature significantly higher than your body, right? So, why doesn't somebody just make a little device that clamps onto your balls and heats them up to a really hot temperature for a while, thus killing your entire package's worth of sperm, and leaving you viable seed free for around six weeks? We'll call it the "Ball-Boiler", and we'll make millions.

    Einhander on
  • VeegeezeeVeegeezee Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Ok.

    Ew.

    Veegeezee on
  • MuddBuddMuddBudd Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    this is a much better idea.

    especially watch the demo. it's is slightly NSFW, but so's the thread.

    That's kinda neat.

    MuddBudd on
    There's no plan, there's no race to be run
    The harder the rain, honey, the sweeter the sun.
  • PataPata Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Einhander wrote: »
    Hey, I've got an even worse idea!

    So, sperm can die pretty easy from being in a temperature significantly higher than your body, right? So, why doesn't somebody just make a little device that clamps onto your balls and heats them up to a really hot temperature for a while, thus killing your entire package's worth of sperm, and leaving you viable seed free for around six weeks? We'll call it the "Ball-Boiler", and we'll make millions.

    This is both the best and worst idea ever.

    Pata on
    SRWWSig.pngEpisode 5: Mecha-World, Mecha-nisim, Mecha-beasts
  • PbPb Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    MuddBudd wrote: »
    this is a much better idea.

    especially watch the demo. it's is slightly NSFW, but so's the thread.

    That's kinda neat.

    Man, it's just like they do with Band-Aids.

    Pb on
  • AbsoluteZeroAbsoluteZero The new film by Quentin Koopantino Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    this is a much better idea.

    especially watch the demo. it's is slightly NSFW, but so's the thread.

    That looks awesome except that it appears I have to be in South Africa to buy them.

    AbsoluteZero on
    cs6f034fsffl.jpg
  • meatflowermeatflower Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Pata wrote: »
    Einhander wrote: »
    Hey, I've got an even worse idea!

    So, sperm can die pretty easy from being in a temperature significantly higher than your body, right? So, why doesn't somebody just make a little device that clamps onto your balls and heats them up to a really hot temperature for a while, thus killing your entire package's worth of sperm, and leaving you viable seed free for around six weeks? We'll call it the "Ball-Boiler", and we'll make millions.

    This is both the best and worst idea ever.

    And how would that address STD's?

    meatflower on
    archer_sig-2.jpg
  • EinhanderEinhander __BANNED USERS regular
    edited February 2007
    It's more of a backup plan to the conventional condom, really. At least this way you wouldn't have to worry about spermicides.

    Einhander on
  • MuddBuddMuddBudd Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    meatflower wrote: »
    Pata wrote: »
    Einhander wrote: »
    Hey, I've got an even worse idea!

    So, sperm can die pretty easy from being in a temperature significantly higher than your body, right? So, why doesn't somebody just make a little device that clamps onto your balls and heats them up to a really hot temperature for a while, thus killing your entire package's worth of sperm, and leaving you viable seed free for around six weeks? We'll call it the "Ball-Boiler", and we'll make millions.

    This is both the best and worst idea ever.

    And how would that address STD's?

    Because it's very hard to spread STD's while doubled over in pain and screaming at the top of your lungs.

    MuddBudd on
    There's no plan, there's no race to be run
    The harder the rain, honey, the sweeter the sun.
  • ZombiemamboZombiemambo Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    MuddBudd wrote: »
    meatflower wrote: »
    Pata wrote: »
    Einhander wrote: »
    Hey, I've got an even worse idea!

    So, sperm can die pretty easy from being in a temperature significantly higher than your body, right? So, why doesn't somebody just make a little device that clamps onto your balls and heats them up to a really hot temperature for a while, thus killing your entire package's worth of sperm, and leaving you viable seed free for around six weeks? We'll call it the "Ball-Boiler", and we'll make millions.

    This is both the best and worst idea ever.

    And how would that address STD's?

    Because it's very hard to spread STD's while doubled over in pain and screaming at the top of your lungs.

    Better yet just use that X-Ray gun from Futurama. "Ow! My sperm!"

    Zombiemambo on
    JKKaAGp.png
  • TerrorbyteTerrorbyte __BANNED USERS regular
    edited February 2007
    This reminds me of that SNL commercial Shirt in a Can.

    "Aaaah, it's burning!"

    Terrorbyte on
  • Lucky CynicLucky Cynic Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Terrorbyte wrote: »
    This reminds me of that SNL commercial Shirt in a Can.

    "Aaaah, it's burning!"

    How come I can't find this on Youtube or Google Video! :(

    I've seen it before but I would like to see it again, so wth!

    Lucky Cynic on
  • ZackSchillingZackSchilling Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    This thread is nothing without pictures. Obviously NSFW.

    http://zack.badcharacter.com/science.jpg
    http://zack.badcharacter.com/spray.jpg
    http://zack.badcharacter.com/spray2.jpg
    http://zack.badcharacter.com/final.jpg

    jan.jpg

    Do not let Jan Krause touch your genitals. He is not a doctor of any sort and he will probably give you a nasty chemical burn.

    (Can any mods give me the go-ahead to make any more of those inline? None of them are too bad but you never know...)

    ZackSchilling on
    ghost-robot.jpg
  • capable heartcapable heart Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Imagine the mistakes and drunken "oops" moments this product would usher in? It's dark, your buzzed, you reach for your trusty spray on "baby be gone" and you grab the wrong spray!

    Edit: Fightinfilipino just won the thread. That actually looks like a cool idea!

    But then I'm sure thats what some folks said about spray on hair back in the day too...

    Heh, fumbling in the dark, half-sober, grabs the hair-spray or something else instead... AHHH, the burning!

    capable heart on
  • FreddyDFreddyD Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    That first picture is comedic gold. I know it is groundbreaking research but it looks like the guy is intently studying a penis someone drew as a prank.

    FreddyD on
Sign In or Register to comment.