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New Webcomic

chief364chief364 Registered User
edited January 2012 in Artist's Corner
I've been over in the advice corner getting some feedback from people, and they told me to post my comic here. I've never done anything like this site before; in fact I just taught myself HTML and CSS last weekend. Anyway, I was hoping to getting some opinions about over here. Don't be afraid to be honest! Just know I'm using stick figures on purpose.

http://notapuff.com/

JENGA

usejenga.jpg

chief364 on
«13

Posts

  • earthwormadamearthwormadam ancient crust Registered User regular
    Web comic-ing is sort of a game of subtraction. For example, remove the last two panels completely, and then remove the dialog from the "we're floating" panel. Still funny, to the point, and not long-winded!

  • MustangMustang Registered User regular
    edited January 2012
    ^ Agreed. The great thing about comics is the less you do, while still making your point, generally the better they work.

    Mustang on
  • NakedZerglingNakedZergling A more apocalyptic post apocalypse Portland OregonRegistered User regular
    Why do you say you use stick figures on purpose? Is this to hide drawing abality? or desire to hire/team up with an artist? What do the stick figures add to the comic?

  • rtsrts Registered User regular
    earthwormadam modified version:
    jenga.jpg

    I like it!

    skype: rtschutter
  • rtsrts Registered User regular
    Wait let me take that even further:
    jenga2.jpg

    skype: rtschutter
  • chief364chief364 Registered User
    edited January 2012
    @earthwormadam I'll take that into account! By the way, I checked out some of your artwork, and it's awesome! You put a ton of personality into everything!

    @NakedZergling I guess I'm just fond of stick figures. I spent a good majority of my elementary and middle school years drawing them. Also, they take a lot less time to draw than actual people. I wish that making comics was all I had to do, but it isn't. In fact, I'm trying to finish writing a paper for a college class right now. :/

    @cakemikz, that last one is pretty damn funny. :)

    As soon as I finish this research paper I've got an idea for another comic, so I'll post it here later so you guys can let me know what you think.

    Also, here's a thing I drew of Geoff Peterson from The Late Late Show in a parody movie poster of The Terminator. If you're a huge geek about the show like me, you know that the guy who voices him got famous for his Arnold Schwartzenager impersonations. The text in the sunglasses is supposed to read "ASS MODE", which is a running gag on the show. It did not convert very well.

    geoff.png

    chief364 on
  • FiskavFiskav Registered User regular
    edited December 2015
    .

    Fiskav on
    steam_sig.png
  • chief364chief364 Registered User
    edited January 2012
    Freshman
    freshman.png

    chief364 on
  • GrifterGrifter BermudaModerator mod
    I don't get it. Is that supposed to be some sort of death ray from the sky? What's the joke?

  • EshEsh Tending bar. FFXIV. Motorcycles. Portland, ORRegistered User regular
    Grifter wrote:
    I don't get it. Is that supposed to be some sort of death ray from the sky? What's the joke?

    If you cross-reference to the other two threads he's created for his comic in other sub-forums it might make a little more sense, though it's still not funny.

    http://forums.penny-arcade.com/discussion/154103/new-webcomic#Item_71

    http://forums.penny-arcade.com/discussion/154164/new-webcomic#Item_2

  • NappuccinoNappuccino Registered User regular
    Grifter wrote:
    I don't get it. Is that supposed to be some sort of death ray from the sky? What's the joke?

    it looks like that gears of war laser death gun thing.

    Like to write? Want to get e-published? Give us a look-see at http://wednesdaynightwrites.com/
    Rorus Raz wrote: »
    There's also the possibility you just can't really grow a bear like other guys.

    Not even BEAR vaginas can defeat me!
    cakemikz wrote: »
    And then I rub actual cake on myself.
    Loomdun wrote: »
    thats why you have chest helmets
  • MustangMustang Registered User regular
    I immediately went to gears too.

  • chief364chief364 Registered User
    edited January 2012
    It is Gears. That's supposed to be the hammer of dawn.

    chief364 on
  • KadokenKadoken Giving Ends to my Friends and it Feels Stupendous Registered User regular
    chief364 wrote:
    Freshman

    freshman.png

    It's a little too random.

    If your doing a general comic, with no theme, that's fine. However, if you switch gears in a couple years or some other amount of time about the theme, people will be pissed. I know after a year or two of PVP not doing game related things I was like "Why is it called PVP anymore? It's just turned into another generic comic like in the newspapers." I know it's the name of the company, and I still read it today but it's just not as good anymore.

  • The Lovely BastardThe Lovely Bastard Registered User regular
    that last one is almost a good joke

    the art actually hurts it, it is not a good joke for a stick figure comic

    the key to making it work would be to not show the body til the end, and then go to town with what a body stuffed with suppositories would look like

    7656367.jpg
  • chief364chief364 Registered User
    edited January 2012
    that last one is almost a good joke

    the art actually hurts it, it is not a good joke for a stick figure comic

    the key to making it work would be to not show the body til the end, and then go to town with what a body stuffed with suppositories would look like
    I get what you're saying, but I feel like that's something I'd rather leave up to the reader's imagination. I mean, I could probably do it, but it seems like it would be a bit... unsavory.

    EDIT: Maybe I can keep the stick figures, but just do what the Perry Fellowship Bible does. You know, like have really simple artwork contrasted by super detailed artwork.

    chief364 on
  • chief364chief364 Registered User
    edited January 2012
    LOOK, UP IN THE SKY!
    roc.png
    Or:
    plane.png
    Or even:
    superman.png

    chief364 on
  • Endless_SerpentsEndless_Serpents Registered User regular
    Is it really too late to change the art style from stick figures to something like Perry Bible Fellowship or even something brand new? Every webcomic changes and grows (or should), improving at this early stand would actually be a betterment, not something to feel bad about.



    Besides man, how are you going to get fan art once you're internet famous if the characters don't have any unique features?

  • chief364chief364 Registered User
    Is it really too late to change the art style from stick figures to something like Perry Bible Fellowship or even something brand new? Every webcomic changes and grows (or should), improving at this early stand would actually be a betterment, not something to feel bad about.



    Besides man, how are you going to get fan art once you're internet famous if the characters don't have any unique features?

    I heard that a good rule of thumb for creating cartoon characters is to make them recognizable by their silhouettes... At least that's what Futurama does.





  • chief364chief364 Registered User
    edited January 2012
    AXE BODY SPRAY ATTRACTS ALL THE HONEYS
    bodyspray.jpg

    I do not own Winnie the Pooh nor claim ownership.

    chief364 on
  • HugmasterGeneralHugmasterGeneral Registered User regular
    so honeys are attacking him?

    what are honeys

  • NappuccinoNappuccino Registered User regular
    Honey Bees

    Like to write? Want to get e-published? Give us a look-see at http://wednesdaynightwrites.com/
    Rorus Raz wrote: »
    There's also the possibility you just can't really grow a bear like other guys.

    Not even BEAR vaginas can defeat me!
    cakemikz wrote: »
    And then I rub actual cake on myself.
    Loomdun wrote: »
    thats why you have chest helmets
  • wonderpugwonderpug Registered User regular
    He should probably get that tumor on his back checked out.

  • chief364chief364 Registered User
    edited January 2012
    @wonderpug what, you don't keep stuff in your belt for storage? I don't know what you do with yours, but that's usually where I keep my tumors.
    @rfilyaw look it up in the urban dictionary.

    chief364 on
  • HugmasterGeneralHugmasterGeneral Registered User regular
    I understand honeys means girls. But do you or anyone you know refer to honeybees as "honeys"?

    That's the only way that joke could work.

  • EshEsh Tending bar. FFXIV. Motorcycles. Portland, ORRegistered User regular
    rfilyaw wrote:
    I understand honeys means girls. But do you or anyone you know refer to honeybees as "honeys"?

    That's the only way that joke could work.

    Exactly.

    I'd honestly slow down, stop vomiting out these really unfunny strips, and work on the scripts. The art obviously takes no time at all, so I think you're going to need to concentrate on your writing. Heavily.

  • DrAlleconDrAllecon Registered User regular
    Maybe if instead of bees, in the last panel he was attacked by a gang of Winnie-the-Poohs?

    I admit the suppository OD got a chuckle out of me. And definitely read The Lovely Bastard's link. It's time well spent.

  • chief364chief364 Registered User
    edited January 2012
    I did read the article earler. It made me look at how I've been writing my panels in a different way. I need to treat it more like I'm attempting to write a really catchy intro for a paper.

    chief364 on
  • MaydayMayday Cutting edge goblin tech Registered User regular
    Listen, chief... are you familiar with chainsawsuit? I think it's a great example of a comic with a very simplistic style (that is not stick figures). If you're into time economy, it might be the way to go.

    Also I like your Peterson drawing, do you have other stuff that is not stick figures?

  • Spectre-xSpectre-x Registered User regular
    chief364 wrote:
    Is it really too late to change the art style from stick figures to something like Perry Bible Fellowship or even something brand new? Every webcomic changes and grows (or should), improving at this early stand would actually be a betterment, not something to feel bad about.



    Besides man, how are you going to get fan art once you're internet famous if the characters don't have any unique features?

    I heard that a good rule of thumb for creating cartoon characters is to make them recognizable by their silhouettes... At least that's what Futurama does.

    And you make stick figures

    which are the least recognizable kind of cartoon, sillhouette or otherwise

    And these are just really bad, too. You can do better, the Peterson drawing proves that, but you keep making these stick figure comics that just don't work, partially because the jokes are poorly thought out and partially because your stick figures are terrible

    terrible

    at conveying action and emotion. What you're "leaving to the reader's imagination" is the entire joke. You provide them with the basic elements of what could be a joke and a punchline, but the reader doesn't get it in any recognizable form and has to make an effort to arrange the elements you've provided into what might have been the intended joke.

    That can work if part of the joke is assembling the joke for yourself. If it's a funny riddle, say. But they never are. All of your jokes are about as sophisticated as the most mundane knock-knock jokes. They're bad. They don't make sense. Not in an absurdist kind of way, either. They're clearly intended to work in one specific way, but the logic behind them is flawed and just doesn't flow at all. They don't work.

    So you need to think about your jokes. Have them make sense. And drop the stick figure look. It's awful. It works against you. If you like the look, you're the only person in existence who does, I'm sorry. It's just no good. You need to do more.

  • chief364chief364 Registered User
    edited January 2012
    chief364 on
  • Endless_SerpentsEndless_Serpents Registered User regular
    edited January 2012
    I'm not going to shower you with praise, but the joke was pretty good, though I'd edit out the falling money, stuff can be just as funny when it's the character that is absurd rather than the world around them.

    Just as a point of interest, the most loved webcomic of this... genre? kind... is Nedroid (possibly), and here is the first ever Nedroid, and the latest:

    http://nedroid.com/2005/09/2210-whee/

    http://nedroid.com/2012/01/deadly-weapons/

    So don't be afraid of changing it up and just completely play around with it until you get something that is both quick enough to fit into your schedule and likeable.

    Ask what Nedroid is about, people will say the characters Beartato and Reginald, which is true, but the first strip was about unicorns, the second was about a mayor, the third was just some round little characters. But it doesn't matter. No one remembers that.

    So just keep at it and be okay with changing things up.

    Endless_Serpents on
  • Endless_SerpentsEndless_Serpents Registered User regular
    In fact I'd say your best move so far is that you didn't name your comic "Something and Something Else", or "The Adventures of ____", now you're free to do whatever you want with it.

  • squidbunnysquidbunny Registered User regular
    The last one is a big step up. :^:

    header_image_sm.jpg
  • EncEnc A Fool with Compassion Pronouns: He, Him, HisRegistered User regular
    edited January 2012
    bribed.jpg

    Not that is is an angle you should go with, or that personified things are always funny (I tend to think so), but this was the first thing I thought when I read that.

    Changes aside, varying your character's pose and angle takes very little work simply by cutting and pasting, mirroring, stretching and shrinking in photoshop, MS Paint, or whatever you have to use. Adding pupils/eyelids opens up a lot more character expression. Even at the most simple, such as family guy, having the eyelids and pupils adds a lot to the conveying of emotion, focus direction, etc.

    Making each panel look significantly different can make the entire piece seem more interesting. Only very seldomly will each panel be repeats of each other in most big webcomics, and that's usually if having a slow, subtle progression is required. Try more dynamic angles, close ups, etc. You don't have to be very elaborate to get more definition, just try new things.

    You are definitely improving from what you posted in H/A, though!

    Enc on
  • wonderpugwonderpug Registered User regular
    chief, did you do the art for Alien Sunset, Lucy in the Sky, and Yes?

    If so, have you considered doing art like that for your comic strip? You wouldn't be able to put out strips as fast, but that would probably be a good thing since you'd want to really plan and refine your joke and presentation before going through all the effort. A series of higher quality jokes done with that higher quality art would be a lot more likely to get noticed.

  • chief364chief364 Registered User
    edited January 2012
    @squidbunny I'm glad you think so! :)

    @Eric lmao on your edit. Also, I've only been able to work with paint so far, but I just downloaded GIMP 2 so that should help expand what I can do with my artwork. Just have to figure out how to use it first...

    @wonderpug Yeah I did!

    Also, I was initially planning on doing like an xkcd or chainsawsuit ripoff, but I think I'll make a humorous sci-fi comic that has an epic story arc. (Well, I'll consider it to be epic... we'll see what everybody else thinks) I'm currently working on the story outline now. As soon as I get done with classes I'll post my initial character sketches below. Well, if I have time; I've been really busy lately. Just got a second job, plus I've got to sell plasma tonight at some point. :/ Anyway, thanks again for all your feedback!

    EDIT: I was able to take pictures of them quick. Here there are. Just so you know, Tali is going to be the main character. Also, keep in mind that the artwork for Stork has already been changed.

    tali.jpg
    gambler.jpg
    stork.jpg
    stipe.jpg

    chief364 on
  • Endless_SerpentsEndless_Serpents Registered User regular
    edited January 2012
    Tell us a bit more about this sci-fi comic, just out of interest.

    Will the whole cast be aliens? Is it onboard a space ship or on a planet? Will it be rebels vs. an empire or just slice of life in SPAAACE?

    Endless_Serpents on
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