NFL Week 5: Please nuke the Jags from orbit, it's the only way to be sure.

Balefuego

WEEK ONE IS OVER!

LET THE CRAZED OVERREACTIONS BEGIN!

MATT RYAN IS ON PACE FOR 4800 YARDS AND 48 TDs (and 16 more rushing)


CHRIS JOHNSON IS ON PACE FOR 64 YARDS ON 176 CARRIES (THAT IS .4 FUCKING YARDS A CARRY. POINT FOUR!!!!!)


KEVIN OGLETREE IS ON PACE FOR 128 CATCHES, 1824 YARDS, AND 32 TDs (career totals for 4 previous seasons combined: 35 catches, 294 yards, 0 TDs)


THE NEW YORK GIANTS ARE ON PACE TO BECOME THE FIRST EVER DEFENDING SUPER BOWL CHAMPIONS TO GO 0-16



These are my week 1 takeaways, what are YOURS

Bogey

Vick's going to throw 64 interceptions this season!

Barcardi

Robert Griffith is Subway!

Balefuego

Bogey wrote: »

Vick's going to throw 64 interceptions this season!

so is Brandon Weeden!

Also I dont remember if anyone posted this in the last thread, but holy shit

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ntbe_YgPP9M

Barcardi

Oakland special teams will cost them every single game.

Bogey

The NY Jets will go on to score 768 points over the regular season, all without Tebow! :shock:

Darkness Mundus

That is an amazing op.

A Dabble Of Thelonius

Welp, lost my in money league. Thanks Chargers! You keep on not using Gates.

Hunter

David Akers will kick 63 field goals of 63 yards this season. Some of them on second or third down, just to help out Alex Smith who hates trying to score TD's in the redzone anyway.

Peen

I will go 16-0 in three of my fantasy leagues and 0-16 in two others. I will never correctly predict a winner in a suicide pool.

Raijin Quickfoot

CJ Spiller is on pace to rush for 2704 yards, thereby destroying the old NFL record.

DrZiplock

Balefuego wrote:

THE NEW YORK GIANTS ARE ON PACE TO BECOME THE FIRST EVER DEFENDING SUPER BOWL CHAMPIONS TO GO 0-16

God dammit, Carlos.

Raijin Quickfoot

RGIII is going to have the greatest season ever for a rookie QB.

Peccavi

Gonna have the least points in the Slow League every week

simo

victor cruz on pace for 48 drops

Galy

The Dallas Cowboys will play no home games this season, bankrupting Jerry Jones and forcing him to sell the team to Mark Cuban.

A Dabble Of Thelonius

Packers on pace for winless season.

They will allow a record 500 yards per game passing. 250 rushing.

Xehalus

Raijin Quickfoot wrote: »

RGIII is going to have the greatest season ever for a rookie QB.

that's really not that crazy of an overreaction

tugga

Man I'm sitting here with just empty hope that Oakland will make the playoffs

Some of you don't know pain like I do

mcp

Oh, I know pain.

Life of a KC fan:

1. Have a shit season.
2. Have a good off season.
3. Spirits high! This will be the year we take a step forward!
4. Go to 1.

Xehalus

homer overreaction: Josh Freeman will channel his inner crowbar and hack his way to 13-3

fantasy overreaction: Peyton Manning will be league MVP and break Brees' passing yards record and Brady's TD record

Balefuego

The best thing about espn's little "projected" calculator is that it for some reason also multiplies the "long" stat, so for example RG3 is somehow on pace to throw an 1100 yard touchdown pass

tugga

mcp wrote: »

Oh, I know pain.

Life of a KC fan:

1. Have a shit season.
2. Have a good off season.
3. Spirits high! This will be the year we take a step forward!
4. Go to 1.

But you'll probably beat the raiders twice

Sometimes I have a dream that Rich Gannon us still our quarterback

Then I wake up and cry

Xehalus

I kinda wish Jason Cambell was still Oakland's quarterback

he worked well with McFadden

simo

was going to do a mcfadden on pace to play 16 games one but i think at that point it just becomes too ridiculous

Sweeney Tom

Hunter wrote: »

David Akers will kick 63 field goals of 63 yards this season. Some of them on second or third down, just to help out Alex Smith who hates trying to score TD's in the redzone anyway.

He'll do this for 63 straight days

On the 64th he'll make a 64 yard try. The ball will be short, but Akers will have kicked so hard his leg will fly off, and kick the ball again up and over the goalpost for the field goal, like in the Simpsons.

Goose!

Ben Roethlisberger is on pace to be sacked 80 times. Haloti Ngata, Randy Starks, Geno Atkins, and Henry Melton are all on pace to shatter the single season sack record with 32 sacks.

Man I'm still pissed that I fell 3 points short of beating Raij last night. Oh well.

mcp

tugga wrote: »

mcp wrote: »

Oh, I know pain.

Life of a KC fan:

1. Have a shit season.
2. Have a good off season.
3. Spirits high! This will be the year we take a step forward!
4. Go to 1.

But you'll probably beat the raiders twice

Sometimes I have a dream that Rich Gannon us still our quarterback

Then I wake up and cry

Sometimes I dream that we didn't let Gannon go in favor of Elvis motherfucking Grbac.

lostwords

I did enjoy your "Rice shoulda run more!" while the Ravens were already comfortably ahead. I mean, dude scored 2 tds on limited carries and saved himself up for what looks to e a tough 3 game stretch ahead, how much more you need from him

Jasconius

oooo

Think I'm taking the Skins in suicide this week. Probably as good a week as any, and I like the two consecutive road games in a dome bit

WeedLordVegeta

the vikings are going to play in 16 overtimes

Henroid

tugga wrote: »

mcp wrote: »

Oh, I know pain.

Life of a KC fan:

1. Have a shit season.
2. Have a good off season.
3. Spirits high! This will be the year we take a step forward!
4. Go to 1.

But you'll probably beat the raiders twice

Sometimes I have a dream that Rich Gannon us still our quarterback

Then I wake up and cry

As an Oakland native, let me be the first to say,

I am used to having shitty seasons.

Goose!

lostwords wrote: »

I did enjoy your "Rice shoulda run more!" while the Ravens were already comfortably ahead. I mean, dude scored 2 tds on limited carries and saved himself up for what looks to e a tough 3 game stretch ahead, how much more you need from him

Just 3 more carries probably would have been enough.

If it werent for stupid Jermaine Gresham, just 1 more woulda been fine.

Maximum

63!

Raijin Quickfoot

So I've read somewhere that the Madden team is possibly working on adding the ability to use edited players and such in Connected Careers mode.

I really hope this happens. It's the only thing that I'm missing this year.

Raijin Quickfoot

Xehalus wrote: »

Raijin Quickfoot wrote: »

RGIII is going to have the greatest season ever for a rookie QB.

that's really not that crazy of an overreaction

After 1 game against the Saints? I disagree with you. Let's see what he does when he has to face a team with an actual defense and an actual head coach.

LTM

Raijin Quickfoot wrote: »

So I've read somewhere that the Madden team is possibly working on adding the ability to use edited players and such in Connected Careers mode.

I really hope this happens. It's the only thing that I'm missing this year.

I would almost go rebuy 13 if they did this, but I'm really enjoying the shit out of 12. I should have bought it last year...

Also, I'd like to apply for the position of driver for the RGIII bandwagon. Where can I do that?

Peen

Raijin Quickfoot wrote: »

Xehalus wrote: »

Raijin Quickfoot wrote: »

RGIII is going to have the greatest season ever for a rookie QB.

that's really not that crazy of an overreaction

After 1 game against the Saints? I disagree with you. Let's see what he does when he has to face a team with an actual defense and an actual head coach.

Like the Eagl..oh wait, actual head coach. Oh.

ANTVGM64

Does anyone here want in on a league that we're running over at G&T? there's a few teams left and I think we could use the blood. The thread is pretty baron of all things football and madden related.

Also, any MUTers here? I'd be down to get my CCGFootball on.

Angry

That's what you get simo.

You get beat by viktor Von autodraft and his 4 yard performance from Chris Johnson.

Dead Legend

lostwords wrote: »

I did enjoy your "Rice shoulda run more!" while the Ravens were already comfortably ahead. I mean, dude scored 2 tds on limited carries and saved himself up for what looks to e a tough 3 game stretch ahead, how much more you need from him

Fantasy football players are notoriously awful

See: my pleas for AJ Green to step it up