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  • TefTef Registered User regular
    Brainleech wrote: »
    Brainleech wrote: »
    I have had to jump out of a burning helicopter on two occasions. I really have no idea how I made it out of one of them as it was spinning every direction and on fire. I jumped/fell out and somehow hit the ground with a oof and thud only to see it blow in midair
    Holy shit

    help a fellow forumer meet their mental health care needs because USA healthcare sucks!

    Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better

    bit.ly/2XQM1ke
  • StaleStale Registered User regular
    Brainleech is an action hero


    this is common knowledge

    easysig2.jpg
  • Donovan PuppyfuckerDonovan Puppyfucker A dagger in the dark is worth a thousand swords in the morningRegistered User regular
    Tef wrote: »
    Brainleech wrote: »
    Brainleech wrote: »
    I have had to jump out of a burning helicopter on two occasions. I really have no idea how I made it out of one of them as it was spinning every direction and on fire. I jumped/fell out and somehow hit the ground with a oof and thud only to see it blow in midair
    Holy shit

    No but seriously, wutdafuck?

  • Blake TBlake T Do you have enemies then? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.Registered User regular
    Stale wrote: »
    Stale wrote: »
    Brainleech is an action hero


    this is common knowledge
    For his own sake I hope he never shows anyone a picture of his kids.

  • MetalbourneMetalbourne Inside a cluster b personalityRegistered User regular
    Oh hey, here's something not a lot of people know:

    When pilots are going through their checklist and they say stuff and then go "check"

    that's not what they're saying
    checklist.jpg

  • TankHammerTankHammer Atlanta Ghostbuster Atlanta, GARegistered User regular
    Oh my god this changes everything!

  • useruser Registered User regular
    The last time I flew incidentally bookended the one and only time in my life I have ever been black-out drunk.

    Ending a trip in NorCal visiting old friends, we decided to have drinks in the few hours before my flight, since it coincided with the end of my friend's workday and it was a Friday.

    I remember really liking the rye sazerac, then getting a mojito...

    What followed was my vaguely percieving being back at my friends' place, haphazardly trying to pack all of my kit (including a weeks worth of camping gear for the trek we did) through waves of nausea. I threw up three times, once in the toilet, once in the kitchen sink, and once in a bucket(?).

    I have no idea how I ended up on my flight, but the very moment I was regaining my sense of sequential time and being myself again, I was carefully positioning the air sickness bags from the two seats adjacent to my own so that I could access them easily.

    I've never been known to be a light drinker, and I really don't know what happened. But if you like strong drinks, I recommend Cesar's in Oakland.

  • Brian KrakowBrian Krakow Registered User regular
    edited November 2012
    My favorite thing about body scanners is that I got through security without even seeing them at La Guardia and Reagan National (I don't even think the former has them) but they were putting everyone through one at Juneau International (except me, because I prefer to have my state-mandated molestations the old fashioned way).

    Brian Krakow on
  • AphostileAphostile San Francisco, CARegistered User regular
    I think Schipol has been my favorite security so far, just because of the goofy bins they give you to put your carry on items in before scanning.

    Also, only on international flights, why is everyone standing all the time? Every flight to Europe or back I've ever been on there's just people standing around chatting or strangely standing by themselves. I get the quick stretch to prevent blood clots and such but not for hours at a time. Sit down, get drunk and pass out like the rest of us!

    Nothing. Matters.
  • WeaverWeaver Breakfast Witch Hashus BrowniusRegistered User regular
    Aphostile wrote: »
    I think Schipol has been my favorite security so far, just because of the goofy bins they give you to put your carry on items in before scanning.

    Also, only on international flights, why is everyone standing all the time? Every flight to Europe or back I've ever been on there's just people standing around chatting or strangely standing by themselves. I get the quick stretch to prevent blood clots and such but not for hours at a time. Sit down, get drunk and pass out like the rest of us!

    Boredom.

  • Slacker71Slacker71 subgenius RentonRegistered User regular
    At Schipol I had a 12 hour layover between flights, so I went and enjoyed Amsterdam for the day.

    I somehow made it to my gate for my flight to Italy without going through security. This was after 9/11.

  • nukanuka What are circles? Registered User regular
    The last I flew was in 1995. I wore overalls and they had to use the wand on the metal detector. I was 8 and when you're at that age right before puberty and you're a girl, you don't want things waving in front of your future titties.

    I had peanuts and orange juice, and it was from Seattle to Spokane.

    When I was 5 my dad and his coworker friend took me up in a little plane, hell if I remember what it was it just had like enough for 3+ in it, and I got to be copilot. I was adorably shy though and I was too afraid to do anything because of the coworker friend next to me. It was still really fucking cool.

    Before all of that I flew from Seattle to Phoenix with a stop over in Denver. I don't remember that one, as I was 3.

    DS: 2667 5365 3193 | 2DS: 2852-8590-3716
  • FavlaudFavlaud just straight up awful Registered User regular
    edited November 2012
    seattle to spokane seems like it wouldn't even warrant a flight

    that's, like, an hour's drive

    edit: okay four and a half hours, nevermind

    for some reason i thought it was in the vicinity of tacoma

    Favlaud on
  • WuShockWuShock Lawful Good South BrownbackistanRegistered User regular
    One of the nice things about working on business jets is that, when you're flying in them, no TSA. No bag searches, no policia, no "Hey-you-can't-bring-that-weapons-grade-uranium-on-the-plane," just get in and go. Also, a lot of FBOs (basically gas stations for general aviation) will still literally roll out the red carpet for you when you pull up.

    That being said, I still love flying commercial because, as was said earlier in the thread, it's flying. (Although, if anybody ever wants to buy my vote, just tell me that you'll dissolve the TSA and the DoHS.) Having been to a fair number of airports, I really like DFW because it's darn near impossible to get lost and just about as hard to miss a connection. You can get from any point in the airport to any other point inside of 10 minutes. O'Hare is a labrynthine mess in comparison (but I like it anyway, because it has some style).

    The absolute worst airport was, is, and always will be Heathrow. God forbid you have to change terminals for a connection at Heathrow, and if you're connecting there, you will. When I finally made it to my departing gate, I really wanted the "found it" music from Legend of Zelda to play, it was THAT difficult.

    LAX isn't half as bad as Newark. I had an early flight out of LAX once and it was crowded, but not objectionably so. The one connection I made through Newark I thought I was going to get mugged at the gate. I didn't think Vegas was bad, other than it was filled with people going to and from Vegas. The weirdest thing there was the constant droning of C-major chords from the slot machines.

    Since I work in aircraft design, I'm pretty chill on the airplane once we're solidly into climbout. If something really bad is going to happen, it'll probably happen on takeoff or landing, and if the weather is good at the destination airport, that all but eliminates landing problems.

    Twixxo wrote:
    WuShock is the best
    He is the very bestest
    I wish I was him

    rx9e87jbbz0w.png

  • mrt144mrt144 King of the Numbernames Registered User regular
    SFO has the best food, hands down.

  • DaMoonRulzDaMoonRulz Mare ImbriumRegistered User regular
    A month ago the Captain's temperature control unit for his windscreen got stuck open, so mid flight the outer windscreen started to spider-web. The slowed way the hell down and luckily we had another 737 coming in from home a few hours later so they just threw a couple mechanics on board with a new windscreen. I took a pic, but I'm too lazy to upload it. We told the passengers the plane had a birdstrike.

    3basnids3lf9.jpg




  • nukanuka What are circles? Registered User regular
    Eh, I've been on car rides to Spokane from the Puget Sound area. I used to live about half an hour from Seattle and it would be a 6 hour ride. I-90 is also REALLY FUCKING DULL.

    DS: 2667 5365 3193 | 2DS: 2852-8590-3716
  • TheStigTheStig Registered User regular
    Tef wrote: »
    Brainleech wrote: »
    Brainleech wrote: »
    I have had to jump out of a burning helicopter on two occasions. I really have no idea how I made it out of one of them as it was spinning every direction and on fire. I jumped/fell out and somehow hit the ground with a oof and thud only to see it blow in midair
    Holy shit

    I've had a blind emergency landing due to a sudden sand storm where the blades on one side like a foot off the ground when we landed.

    Another time the black hawk ahead of us in our group was slinging some cargo and ran their blades into it while landing severely injuring everyone on board.

    Fuck flying helicopters in the desert.

    bnet: TheStig#1787 Steam: TheStig
  • mrt144mrt144 King of the Numbernames Registered User regular
    TheStig wrote: »
    Tef wrote: »
    Brainleech wrote: »
    Brainleech wrote: »
    I have had to jump out of a burning helicopter on two occasions. I really have no idea how I made it out of one of them as it was spinning every direction and on fire. I jumped/fell out and somehow hit the ground with a oof and thud only to see it blow in midair
    Holy shit

    I've had a blind emergency landing due to a sudden sand storm where the blades on one side like a foot off the ground when we landed.

    Another time the black hawk ahead of us in our group was slinging some cargo and ran their blades into it while landing severely injuring everyone on board.

    Fuck flying helicopters in the desert.

    Hovercrafts are teh future!

  • MetalbourneMetalbourne Inside a cluster b personalityRegistered User regular
    mrt144 wrote: »
    TheStig wrote: »
    Tef wrote: »
    Brainleech wrote: »
    Brainleech wrote: »
    I have had to jump out of a burning helicopter on two occasions. I really have no idea how I made it out of one of them as it was spinning every direction and on fire. I jumped/fell out and somehow hit the ground with a oof and thud only to see it blow in midair
    Holy shit

    I've had a blind emergency landing due to a sudden sand storm where the blades on one side like a foot off the ground when we landed.

    Another time the black hawk ahead of us in our group was slinging some cargo and ran their blades into it while landing severely injuring everyone on board.

    Fuck flying helicopters in the desert.

    Hovercrafts are teh future!

    Hovercopters!

  • HitsuraptorHitsuraptor Registered User regular
    I flew out to Tasmania (the little island down the bottom of Australia) a few weeks ago for work and they had the best sniffer dog ever. instead of the usual German Sheppard or Labrador it was a beagle who would walk on the luggage carousel then if she found anything would just sit next to the bag.
    I really wanted to pat that dog but Dont think that would've gone down well with the security people
    and don't call me Shirley

  • LegbaLegba He did. Registered User regular
    edited November 2012
    I fly a few times a year and usually it's all good.

    There was that one time I was queuing up for the metal detector and realized I had a keepsake knife in my jacket pocket. I'm not the most inconspicuous guy when I get nervous, so a guard pulled me out of the queue from halfway across the room. He took me to a side room where they had one of the then brand new body scanners. He was quite disappointed when he didn't find narcotics iny bum, but he's the one who told me to remove my shoes and jacket first.

    Also, phone posting sucks.

    Legba on
  • PlatyPlaty Registered User regular
    Stale wrote: »
    Brainleech is an action hero


    this is common knowledge

    This is the guy who also once woke up in a morgue.

  • VeldrinVeldrin Sham bam bamina Registered User regular
    I once got pulled aside and questioned going through the scanners in Malaysia because they picked up an American silver dollar I had in my luggage.

    That was... different.

  • ShoemakerShoemaker Registered User regular
    Stale wrote: »
    Brainleech is an action hero


    this is common knowledge

    This is the guy who also once woke up in a morgue.

    So he's "the nameless one" from Planescape: Torment?

  • MetalbourneMetalbourne Inside a cluster b personalityRegistered User regular
    Shoemaker wrote: »
    Stale wrote: »
    Brainleech is an action hero


    this is common knowledge

    This is the guy who also once woke up in a morgue.

    So he's "the nameless one" from Planescape: Torment?

    Stale is the only person I'd believe if they said they'd woken up in a morgue.

    Like, with a mortician in the middle of embalming him. "You're...You're supposed to be dead," they whimper while backing up against the wall.

    "I'm walking it off!" Stale screams while looking for his pants.

  • Donovan PuppyfuckerDonovan Puppyfucker A dagger in the dark is worth a thousand swords in the morningRegistered User regular
    I flew out to Tasmania (the little island down the bottom of Australia) a few weeks ago for work and they had the best sniffer dog ever. instead of the usual German Sheppard or Labrador it was a beagle who would walk on the luggage carousel then if she found anything would just sit next to the bag.
    I really wanted to pat that dog but Dont think that would've gone down well with the security people
    and don't call me Shirley

    Beagles is quarantine. Looking for foodstuffs and things like leathergoods. Customs is the big dogs.

  • SkylarkSkylark o7 Vile Rat o7 o7 Photon Torpedo o7Registered User regular
    Shoemaker wrote: »
    Stale wrote: »
    Brainleech is an action hero


    this is common knowledge

    This is the guy who also once woke up in a morgue.

    So he's "the nameless one" from Planescape: Torment?

    Or Jake from Shadowrun SNES.

    Schiphol is by far the most user-friendly airport I've been through, for hassle-free security and check-in, ease of transfers, easy access to Amsterdam, and general atmosphere, although I do miss the days when you could smoke in some of the bars and cafes in the terminal arms. On the other hand, there is Heathrow, which is literal poop from a butt; getting stuck there during a transfer due to a bomb threat was not fun. Fiumicino looks like it should be a pile of crap, but is surprisingly decent, and it helps that the train connections to Termini are even better than in Amsterdam.

    I had a fun experience in Athens three years ago when I forgot to take one of these out of my carry-on. They were pretty cool about it though, and the only consequence was a stern finger-wagging. They didn't even bother to pat me down after.

  • VixxVixx Valkyrie: prepared! Registered User regular
    edited November 2012
    Blake T wrote: »
    One time, when Vivienne and I were travelling through security and Vivienne was yelling at me for, something and the guy asked us if we were travelling together, and I said I'd prefer not to, do you have anyone I can travel with.

    And he pointed at some girls and said try my luck over there. I thanked him for having my back.

    :\

    Vixx on
    6cd6kllpmhb0.jpeg
  • ShortyShorty touching the meat Intergalactic Cool CourtRegistered User regular
    ruh-roh

  • AphostileAphostile San Francisco, CARegistered User regular
    Flights confirmed for Hong Kong, free upgrades confirmed. Woooo.

    Now to start looking for hotels. I'll probably try and stay at a few different ones.

    Nothing. Matters.
  • BrainleechBrainleech 機知に富んだコメントはここにあります Registered User regular
    Stale wrote: »
    Brainleech is an action hero


    this is common knowledge

    This is the guy who also once woke up in a morgue.

    no I was found still "alive" in one or that is what I was told

    Still I have jumped out of planes and really do find people scared of heights rather curious. I mean how can you be scared of being on top of the ladder when I have seen the ground zipping by at 7000 feet or more.


    But to repell out of helicopters while taking fire is still a scary thing you feel so vulnerable.

    one of the worst rides was a seaking in a storm as we were transfering from a boat to another. In the south china sea during the summer is always fun with the number of storms {winter is somethign to sea when it snows at sea] so we are being buffeted in the storm with the wind and we begin to see tons of lighting. the co-pilot beings to joke with us about how we have not puked and how this is the weridest roller coaster he has ever been on {he said land based ones were tame and he was not kidding}
    Still it was an impressive job they did to land they hit the deck square on and powered down and ran for it because they lighting was comming in fast .

  • Blake TBlake T Do you have enemies then? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.Registered User regular
    Vivixenne wrote: »
    Blake T wrote: »
    One time, when Vivienne and I were travelling through security and Vivienne was yelling at me for, something and the guy asked us if we were travelling together, and I said I'd prefer not to, do you have anyone I can travel with.

    And he pointed at some girls and said try my luck over there. I thanked him for having my back.

    :\

    You weren't grumpy at me when he said it!

    Ok, you weren't grumpy at me, for that particular reason when he said it.

  • TankHammerTankHammer Atlanta Ghostbuster Atlanta, GARegistered User regular
    It's a funny story and I'm glad Blake told it.

  • godmodegodmode Southeast JapanRegistered User regular
    Going on the Fly-Fly in just a few hours!

  • VixxVixx Valkyrie: prepared! Registered User regular
    edited November 2012
    Blake T wrote: »
    Vivixenne wrote: »
    Blake T wrote: »
    One time, when Vivienne and I were travelling through security and Vivienne was yelling at me for, something and the guy asked us if we were travelling together, and I said I'd prefer not to, do you have anyone I can travel with.

    And he pointed at some girls and said try my luck over there. I thanked him for having my back.

    :\

    You weren't grumpy at me when he said it!

    Ok, you weren't grumpy at me, for that particular reason when he said it.

    : /

    Vixx on
    6cd6kllpmhb0.jpeg
  • jwalkjwalk Registered User regular
    I just hate how security has different rules every time I fly. I only fly maybe once every 2 years so I dunno if they actually change the rules all the time or if they are just inconsistent.. Take your shoes off, or not.. take your belt off, or not. A few years ago they were making people take their shoes off but the rule was if you were wearing sneakers/tennis shoes you didn't have to take them off, but any other kind of shoes you did. Well the guy in front of me was wearing FLIP FLOPS, yes those rubber shower shoes, and they made him take them off. WTF?? We were both laughing our asses off, I mean you can SEE the guy's WHOLE GODDAM FOOT. But then I'm wearing sneakers & socks didn't have to take them off? Just fuckin LOL.

    Last time I flew I was wearing a hoodie and the guy started screaming at me "YOUR SWEATSHIRT YOUR SWEATSHIRT!!" I'm like "yea what about it?" "TAKE IT OFF!!" what the fuck dude, first of all stop screaming at me like I'm a prisoner and you're a guard, I'm the paying customer here, show some respect.. And why do I have to take my sweatshirt off? It says "hats and jackets must be removed".. does a hoodie look like a fuckin jacket to you, jackhole? fucks sakes.

    Then there's the whole "put all your liquids in a baggie" thing, yeah I don't bother with that anymore. Every time I fly now I just throw my toothpaste and shampoo and everything else in my bag, it goes thru the x-ray no problem, they never say anything, and I walk right on the plane with it. Hell one time I had a half-pint carton of orange juice in my bag, I just forgot it was in there... whooops.jpg

  • Blake TBlake T Do you have enemies then? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.Registered User regular
    Livin life on the edge there jwalk.

  • nevilleneville The Worst Gay (Seriously. The Worst!)Registered User regular
    jwalk wrote: »
    I just hate how security has different rules every time I fly. I only fly maybe once every 2 years so I dunno if they actually change the rules all the time or if they are just inconsistent.. Take your shoes off, or not.. take your belt off, or not. A few years ago they were making people take their shoes off but the rule was if you were wearing sneakers/tennis shoes you didn't have to take them off, but any other kind of shoes you did. Well the guy in front of me was wearing FLIP FLOPS, yes those rubber shower shoes, and they made him take them off. WTF?? We were both laughing our asses off, I mean you can SEE the guy's WHOLE GODDAM FOOT. But then I'm wearing sneakers & socks didn't have to take them off? Just fuckin LOL.

    Last time I flew I was wearing a hoodie and the guy started screaming at me "YOUR SWEATSHIRT YOUR SWEATSHIRT!!" I'm like "yea what about it?" "TAKE IT OFF!!" what the fuck dude, first of all stop screaming at me like I'm a prisoner and you're a guard, I'm the paying customer here, show some respect.. And why do I have to take my sweatshirt off? It says "hats and jackets must be removed".. does a hoodie look like a fuckin jacket to you, jackhole? fucks sakes.

    Then there's the whole "put all your liquids in a baggie" thing, yeah I don't bother with that anymore. Every time I fly now I just throw my toothpaste and shampoo and everything else in my bag, it goes thru the x-ray no problem, they never say anything, and I walk right on the plane with it. Hell one time I had a half-pint carton of orange juice in my bag, I just forgot it was in there... whooops.jpg

    hey, show some respect, man.
    these people train for minutes at a time and have the care and dedication to their job of a 16 year old looking to make a few bucks to buy some bullshit they will forget about in an hour
    oh that is the respect they deserve. got it!

    nevillexmassig1.png
  • jwalkjwalk Registered User regular
    look I know I have a problem with authority but can I get on the plane without some mall cop shoving his finger up my ass?
    save that stuff for later.
    I promise, I hardly ever fly with massive amounts of contraband shoved up my ass anymore.

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