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Ex GF wants to give us another shot and I'm having very mixed feelings about it

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  • _J__J_ Pedant Registered User, __BANNED USERS regular
    Jean wrote: »
    bowen wrote: »
    In 'Murica we counter that to say "your penis is dumb so you should stop letting it make decisions about your life."

    *laugh* I used to think I was above that

    I might be an introverted nerd but I'm as weak as anyone else when it comes to sex

    You say that you don't trust her, but your actions indicate that you want to trust her, despite your knowing that it's problematic to continue this. Something that may be helpful is for you to list the reasons WHY you want to trust her, why you WANT to keep talking to her. Presumably there is more to it than just "she's a good fuck, and I'm too introverted to find another good fuck."

    I sometimes find it beneficial to list the reasons why I want to continue to do something, and then reflect upon that list of reasons. Over time, you may be able to disconnect yourself from the list, and view it objectively. So, after a few weeks, you start to think, "Hmm...this appears to be a list constructed by an emotionally damaged weak-willed crazy person.....oh shit....I'm the one who made the list." That realization can prompt you to change, since you realize you're acting in a way that is contrary to how you think a reasonable person ought to act.

    You don't have to share the list on the forums, but I would encourage you to make it, and read it every other day.

  • JeanJean Heartbroken papa bear Gatineau, QuébecRegistered User regular
    Cooler heads have prevailed. I will NOT go back with this girl. This thread may be closed now. Thank you to everyone who have helped me :)

    "You won't destroy us, You won't destroy our democracy. We are a small but proud nation. No one can bomb us to silence. No one can scare us from being Norway. This evening and tonight, we'll take care of each other. That's what we do best when attacked'' - Jens Stoltenberg
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