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What do you want to be when you grow up? [Job Thread]
MortalToaster
Registered User regular
Registered User regular
Yessss, I love hearing other customer service horror storiesWhat do you do?!I had someone scream at me today, literally scream, as loud as a person can, to the point where I could hear them straining with the effort, for almost 80 minutes, pretty much non-stop. It was incredible. Like speaking to a stressed out female Nic Cage after they'd jammed a spoonful of coke under each eyelid.
If only they had screamed a tiny bit louder. Like all customer service, we help people entirely based on how loud the phone call is.
Yessss, I love hearing other customer service horror stories
continuing where we left off...
(also tell us you trials and travails from work)
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Basically I hate when one or two computers or users can't do the thing that everyone else can do.
Things might be reaching a head with me and work. I went back to college and they offered to keep me on part time. My initial plan was to give maths grinds for which there is plenty of demand but was convinced otherwise.
Anyway it's my week off and I've shit loads of college work to do that I won't be able to do next week because it's my week on and I'll be basically either be in lectures or at work every day all day next week. So the boss says can I come in for a meeting tomorrow, to which I say, I don't have the time. He says ok but drops in an ultimatum that this arrangement will be unworkable in the future. I say I need more warning time in advance because of all the school work I have to do and then relent and say I'll come in anyway. He tells me not to bother. So I send him a big text saying sorry (though I aint really got much to be sorry for) and to please consider that I have other stuff on when arranging meetings. Now he's assigned someone else to be my 'boss' so he won't be dealing with me anymore.
I really don't have the time to start studying the maths curriculum again right now (I would have had if I left when I initially planned) so I'm pretty much stuck here and have to suck this shit up urghh. Hopefully my grant will come through
Its.....interesting.
I guess I see it as a good thing.
But a lot of older folk in the company are all "whenever HR does something like this, its usually because they are planning lay offs in the future and want to build a strong case"
So I guess well see who survives at the end of the year?
PARKER, YOU'RE FIRED! <-- My comic book podcast! Satan look here!
"These five users need access set up."
"Ok, I've got that done for you. Here are the credentials they will all use."
"And you communicated that to the users, right?
"No, fuck you. You asked for them to be created, you're the account manager, that is your job."
I think we have our new head of Asian futures support.
How can I take an excel file that has information in a bunch of columns
And than save it in a semicolon delimited format.
PARKER, YOU'RE FIRED! <-- My comic book podcast! Satan look here!
I hate smiles and the phrase, "Please advise," in most email.
Mostly because when a user says, "Please advise," it means, "No one trained me."
You can't just Save As and in the file type select CSV?
we also talk about other random shit and clown upon each other
yeah, save as CSV, re-open in notepad and do a replace all on your commas with semicolons. i don't think excel has an option to use other characters for a CSV format
I was getting excited about starting at the end of the month along with starting driving lessons.
I guess I should start looking at other things I could be doing.
The previously mentioned Save As CSV and Find>Replace will work, provided none of the data in your columns contains commas, because then those commas will get replaced, too.
Anyway, I found this
Interesting method of doing it.
Edit: Windows 7 version:
They wanted this manual but it was still in the draft stages because of missing and incorrect information, so she sends them a draft, stressing that this is a draft and is not ready for release.
Two weeks later she finds out from tech support that someone had bypassed the process (she is supposed to give the final order for release) and scanned a printed version of the draft (which was given as a PDF, btw) and uploaded it as a release.
It was probably one of the dumbass PMs at her workplace who was getting hounded by a customer for not having manuals for their product (this is a common occurrence, and it happens because they don't tell her department that they need a manual until the product is already out in the wild).
Ya I cant do the find/replace because this is for site content that has commas all over it. It would screw up my import.
PARKER, YOU'RE FIRED! <-- My comic book podcast! Satan look here!
Hopefully this idea pans out. Could save me weeks of work
PARKER, YOU'RE FIRED! <-- My comic book podcast! Satan look here!
Dude, you complain constantly about your job.
Let's find you something you LIKE doing, because I'm sure we can.
The Bay Area has a huge need for people who do what you do.
Send me your resume, I can see if we have anything... if not, there are tons of places around here that would probably be a good fit.
"How Video Games are Tested"
Focusing on Blizzard's process and how my team improved their process. Should be pretty fun.
I've pretty much decided that the only way I will ever get out of Texas is if someone pays for my travel. With my current skill set, I don't see that happening any time soon.
But I will send it over sometime later just in case!
What's your skillset? And where in Texas?
But I also support our CRM integration, so I know how to admin SalesForce environments (mostly), as well as MS Dynamics, and Oracle CRMs. That's the thing I think I might actually be able to get a new job doing. The only issue is that I don't have the necessary certifications (yet).
Pretty sure we'd hire someone for that and are looking for more technical/cs people who can do exactly that.
Also my tech talk -- "How Video Games are Tested" -- went really well.
6 people came by since to tell me it was awesome and had a lot of questions during it.
wooo
I am getting so nervous, as I only have one day left on my Microsoft contract position.
Cautiously optimistic.....jobs don't call you asking for a return call just to say "lolnope" right? Right?
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The company has ordered a plant wide mandate of no more cussing in the plant. Telling a bunch of grizzly old steel mill workers they can't say "fuck" when something goes wrong is like telling a fish it can't swim. Nobody knows how they are going to punish people if they are caught cussing or if they are even able to. But it's been fun to test the limits so far
You should already be in good form do to your kids.
*Drop something on toe* "Son of a biscuit fornicating lint licker!"
But when I got this job, the guy who actually got me the job was already named Scott, and we were in the same department. So, I was going to just answer the phones with Michael. But I couldn't do that, because there was already a Michael, too.
So now, I have to answer the phones by saying "Thank you for calling Customer Support. This is Michael-Scott, how can I help you?"
"Michael Scott?! Like from The Office?!"
Luckily, the number of times I've heard this stupid joke has dropped from once a day to about once a week, but it is still completely dumb and unoriginal.
I'm half-tempted to add something to my internal signature, saying that if you make that stupid joke, then I'm going to block your email.
For those 2 hours, calls are taken and dispatched using fucking index cards.
You fuckers just got a 10% raise. How about you come in when it's not the middle of the day so I'm not passing fucking notes to my radio guys about the goddamned armed robbery going on right this second.
Annoyed, I curtly told him that I couldn't help with whatever his technical issue was since I work entirely in the phone department (pointing to the hanging sign with 10" letters on it) and led him to the nearby EasyTech desk (with the 24" letters).
Apparently he had some kind of virus since he'd turned down our offer to install a security suite on his machine when we sold it to him. He was sure that it was the government messing with his computer. He was also foreign which might explain his initial point-and-grunt method of communication. I'm glad I don't work technical support some days.
i'm going to have an email signature.
i'm going to have a job title.
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
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one magically fixed itself after I booted into the wrong network boot environment after an hour of waiting.
The second one was already having random restarts before I got there and as I was troubleshooting it just died on me. I figure its the HDD because of reasons, so I tell her I'll bring a new one to her tomorrow morning because god forbid we have any tools/parts at our school sites.
Then as I am driving away I remember that I have two fresh and ready HDDs, that I was going to use on just upgrading some other computers that I never got to, in my bag.
whooops.jpg
I am the best at IT
I've had it happen before. Depends on the place.
Depends on what you're doing. We have a ton of customizations that product management wants, so yeah.
haha oh man, i bet this is going to go over real well
sounds exactly like a rule some stupid bean counter who probably never actually worked on the floor of the plant would come up with
Insurance, sales and service.
It's mostly just boring, but a few times a week you'll get to speak to someone insane. After nearly 10 years (fucking kill me) doing it, it all just sort of washes over me now, but that screaming lady was actually impressive. She wasn't even being nasty or hurling abuse or anything, she was just all volume. I almost laughed at one point, because she mentioned she was unemployed. Geez lady, how can someone as reasonable as you not find work? Having trouble with the interviews? Scream louder.
"Are you signing in from an iPhone or a smart pad?"
Besides the fact that iPhones are not the only kind of smart phone, a smart pad?
No, I'm using a stupid pad. Does that make a difference?
WORDS MATTER, DUMMY
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Ugh. That would annoy me so much but I would probably never actually try to correct him because my level of intensity would be disproportionate to the severity of the problem.
I'm waging my own little private war against people who call all smartphones and tablets by their Apple Corporation equivalent's brand-name.