This is a anonymous account as there people here that know me and I rather they don't know about this yet.
I realize how weird this story sounds. But I promise is completely true. I'm coming here because I don't know who else to share this with.
My wife and I have been together for about seven years. Been overall happy. Sure, a couple of fights, but I wouldn't say anything out of the norm.
One of the things where she and I differ is about money. She's always spent it freely while I have tried to be conservative-but often failed for one reason or another. This past year, we looked at our finances and decided we needed to buckle down, start going out less and putting in money in savings. This has actually worked for us for the most past.
This past year, she also got REALLY into the whole Sherlock BBC fandom. Reads the fan fictions, big on tumblr, made a bunch of friends, etc. I teased her about it, but I got my nerdy thing, so while it sometimes caused friction (when my jokes went too long/far or I felt she was going in the deep end) but I wouldn't really have thought about it till now.
See, for the last two months or so she's been talking about how a bunch of her online friends are heading to London for a meetup and stuff and how she would really like to attend. We had a serious conversation once or twice about it where I (thought) we agreed that we couldn't swing it this year. She would still bring it up, but I thought it was jokingly.
Write around this time, she decided to go after a promotion at work which would require her to travel more.
I'm sure you guys can see where this is going. This week she was going out of town, first for a one day trip and then for a longer, five day trip. She left yesterday for the longer trip.
Today, I get home, speak to her for just a few minutes where she tells me about her day and says she's going to bed early because her back hurts. Little bit later, I'm checking my email, and I come across an email from ATT saying that her phone number (we share a plan) has gone over her international data limit. It still doesn't click with me. I call ATT, and explain the lady that this has to be wrong, because my wife is still in the country. The lady then tells me that it's showing the data being used in the UK.
That's when it clicks.
Call her up, confront her, and at first she lies, and it's only when I ask her to swear to god she's in the country that she admits she's in fucking London. And one of the first things she tells me is that "you gave me no other choice." Turns out she's been squirreling away her own money for a while, and she had often mentioned how an online friend was offering to let her stay in her place while she was there, so I figure that's where she is at.
I just don't know what to say or do at this point. I yelled at her, curse at her, and then hung up. My phone is off right now. I don't know what to do. I love her, I don't want to break up, but this...this feels so damn big. At BEST she made up this whole storyline, kept lying to me every time we talked about her upcoming trip, and then went to London. And she's using money that could have gone towards both of our lives. At worst, I don't know what's worst. She's cheating on me with someone in London, I guess?