I got one of those just after I signed up, before I added anything to my profile. I'm in AZ and this "person" is in WY. I assumed it was either pay to see naked pics, or pretend girlfriend send me money. Only one I've gotten so far though, and really easy to spot.
I am looking for a new friend, would you like to text? I am in Tucson now. My number is 1234567, text me if `y ou like,
I have private pics.
AtomBomb on
I just got a 3DS XL. Add me! 2879-0925-7162
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silence1186Character shields down!As a wingmanRegistered Userregular
That is pretty much word for word the message I got.
Had a longer talk tonight about exclusivity with one of the people I'm seeing. I feel like... man. I like them a lot. I like all of them a lot, though. I want to do right by all of them. There are no weed-out conditions, you know? There's no like "oh they'd be perfect except..." They're all great people I want to make sure are feeling great.
But I just got out of a "my entire adult life" relationship. I don't want to start being exclusively attached to another person a month into my experience being single. And I mean I really like these people, but there's no future where I can make all of them happy by being with them exclusively. So I need to focus on right now.
But anyway, the person I spoke to tonight said that as long as we check in and update, they're cool with it. I'm seeing people once a week, and I'm making certain to let everyone know what is going on.
It's complex. But I'd rather deal with complexity and honesty than going behind anyone's back just because it was less awkward for me personally. Also frankly they all seem to be willing to put up with complexity in order to kiss my extremely cute face after I've finished cooking for them.
NocrenLt Futz, Back in ActionNorth CarolinaRegistered Userregular
Just make sure you're on the same page.
My dad recently broke up with this girl he was kinda seeing for about 2 years (lots of favors were done for each other, we helped rearrange furniture in her house, she introduced me to her daughter that worked at a state agency and put my name forward after I submitted my paperwork, my dad spent some time with her adult son), but she told him that she was still kinda seeing other people as well so my dad broke it off.
I mean I can understand his reasonings and where he's coming from though.
I do have a much better follow up story that I'll post later though.
Good date. Conversation was a little on the superficial side, but i found out a fair bit (turns out she's Nepalese, though you couldn't tell from talking to her. Only emigrated about 9 years ago). Impressed a little with some of my knowledge of other countries. She took me off into the park near where we met, walked, talked, milkshakes.
Date tonight with one of the lovely people I'm seeing! Pizza and beer at an awesome local place followed by hanging out, followed by doing a Pluto Time photo, followed by more hanging out!
I still get like, super nervous beforehand. Then for the first 5 minutes I'm like oh man wait what if we don't have anything to talk about oh gosh
edit: it was great and we have so many things to talk about!
Huh, it appears my weekend is a bit stuffed for even asking her out again. Going on this special 5k thing (really just one long dance party) on Saturday night which requires me to go out and get my participant materials at some store in BFE on Friday night, and god knows how long that will take with traffic and any lines.
A good looking event was available Friday evening as well. Drat.
Just got back from my first date in many years. A pretty great person who likes dancing and every geeky thing but the one I do for a living found me on OKCupid and we had coffee and frozen yogurt and chocolates while she hid under an umbrella to dodge the sun. Seeing her again on Friday at a particularly pleasant club to have company at.
I thought these were all competing sites, I didn't realize one company was running almost the whole show. It's kinda weird that a complete shit show like Match.com is owned by the same people that run the perfectly fine and generally well recommended OKC. I wonder what their long term goal here is.
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silence1186Character shields down!As a wingmanRegistered Userregular
Date tonight with one of the lovely people I'm seeing! Pizza and beer at an awesome local place followed by hanging out, followed by doing a Pluto Time photo, followed by more hanging out!
I still get like, super nervous beforehand. Then for the first 5 minutes I'm like oh man wait what if we don't have anything to talk about oh gosh
edit: it was great and we have so many things to talk about!
Hahaha. Nothing to talk about is still, and will always be, my number one fear. But with the right one, there's no such thing. Even a shared silence can be kind of magical.
Had a second date (the curse of only 1st dates is lifted!) last weekend. Another 9.5 hours together, same as the first. I really adore this girl. We played Tekken and Rainbow Six and I didn't have to let her win or hand her any kills.
The excruciating part? She's only just back on the dating market and doesn't want to commit again right away. She's scared of falling in love too quick and wants to take her time and make sure she makes the right choice. Fair enough.
Another rejection is a scary prospect, especially when it's from someone who very clearly likes me. But hey I like her and am not afraid to tell her that.
I thought these were all competing sites, I didn't realize one company was running almost the whole show. It's kinda weird that a complete shit show like Match.com is owned by the same people that run the perfectly fine and generally well recommended OKC. I wonder what their long term goal here is.
Maybe they will make PoF's interface better. No, wait, I was just at Match to see if I could find out anything about someone who messaged me (since I'm not paying them, I couldn't) and it is still bad as well.
Don't they also own Chemistry.com?
It is weird that they haven't consolidated any of these services. Also, probably a good thing because it means they aren't screwing up OKC.
I still remember seeing ads for AM on CNN or some other news channel.
It started off fairly normal with guy raging about how these dating sites for married couples and how "now there's Ashley Madison which guarantees a discret affair? Let's put a stop to this now! *background sharters* Go to mymarriagematters.com!"
Looked it up, and yep, both sites were owned by the same company.
They'd have to bribe the hell out of me and provide free legal council in case of divorce for me to ever get married.
Well they likely would have enough knowledge of matching algorithms by that point to point you towards the most compatible lawyers, relationship counselors, and notaries in the area . . .
They'd have to bribe the hell out of me and provide free legal council in case of divorce for me to ever get married.
Well they likely would have enough knowledge of matching algorithms by that point to point you towards the most compatible lawyers, relationship counselors, and notaries in the area . . .
Putting up a new picture sure does increase your page views & possible new messages.
On the flip side, this lady I'd been messaging for a little while just put up a new main profile pic where she has a resemblance to my mom and now I can't unsee it. :?
KupotheAvengerDestroyer of Cakeand other deserts.Registered Userregular
I just gotta say, I'm really happy with the happy turn this thread has become.
That being said, it's official, I'm moving in with my girlfriend in September. Seems like end game material considering I'm transplanting to that most evil of places....San Francisco.
I finally got the nerve to try out Internet dating. Someone wish me luck!
Tinder was easier than I thought to set up and use. OKC took awhile. I may have come to the realization that I am pretty boring, wasting all my time with these video game things. Ill post a link to my profile for your amusement whenever I figure out how. user name is Lostinthought_31 if you can look it up that way. I would appreciate any tips you might have.
Not a good sign that where I am is one of the worst places for matches according to OKC. Apparently I need to move to Washington? I guess all the cool people are there.
Also, thanks everyone for posting your tips and experiences. I've been lurking for awhile until I thought I was dateable material and reading your adventures has given me hope.
I may be moving south in January and I set my location to where I may be moving to and holy shit, it's like the promised land of internet dating. I may actually get to have fun with this whole internet dating thing next year.
I am super glad I experimented with it up here first now.
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KupotheAvengerDestroyer of Cakeand other deserts.Registered Userregular
Putting up a new picture sure does increase your page views & possible new messages.
On the flip side, this lady I'd been messaging for a little while just put up a new main profile pic where she has a resemblance to my mom and now I can't unsee it. :?
I went out with a girl who when I met her in person looked exactly like my best friend's girlfriend. She even had almost the exact same voice. Which is too bad, because she was actually pretty cool. But I couldn't shake the feeling that I was talking to my friend's girlfriend.
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NocrenLt Futz, Back in ActionNorth CarolinaRegistered Userregular
I just gotta say, I'm really happy with the happy turn this thread has become.
That being said, it's official, I'm moving in with my girlfriend in September. Seems like end game material considering I'm transplanting to that most evil of places....San Francisco.
I'm pretty sure I could move in with my girlfriend (she owns a house so it would be the better move), unfortunately I currently live a 20 minute drive from work (even with bad traffic) as opposed to living a quarter tank of gas away and a commute that can last between 50 to 90 minutes. (She works from home so living in a small town isn't an issue for her)
Right now we're alternating weekends visits.
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KupotheAvengerDestroyer of Cakeand other deserts.Registered Userregular
I just gotta say, I'm really happy with the happy turn this thread has become.
That being said, it's official, I'm moving in with my girlfriend in September. Seems like end game material considering I'm transplanting to that most evil of places....San Francisco.
I'm pretty sure I could move in with my girlfriend (she owns a house so it would be the better move), unfortunately I currently live a 20 minute drive from work (even with bad traffic) as opposed to living a quarter tank of gas away and a commute that can last between 50 to 90 minutes. (She works from home so living in a small town isn't an issue for her)
Right now we're alternating weekends visits.
Yeah but currently we're long distance. Like LA to SF long. I'm functionally quitting my job and breaking my lease to do this...so it should be interesting.
Hope you have a supply of organs on hand to sell so that you can afford the housing.
I'm sure Kupo won't have to worry about that.
He's probably played enough Elite to put together a map of where he can get the best prices for each organ instead of dumping them all in one market.
Well of course. I can make my rent in two organ runs, mainly kidneys, but if I get time I like to focus on the major runs. Like hearts and minds...literally.
Is there a certain amount of time you guys usually wait before moving in with a bf/gf? Or does it vary depending on whenever it "feels right" with that person?
For me it would depend on the situation, but I'm really far from current experience. My wife and I moved in together when we were 20 or 21, after we had been dating for a few months. When the lease on my apartment came up we were already spending most of our time together, so the "logical" thing to do seemed to be me moving into her apartment, and then looking for something together when her lease was up. Now I own a house that I like. If I was dating someone who also owned a house they liked, I could see us putting cohabitating off. Distance could be a factor, too. I guess it also depends how scary you find commitment. I got married at 22, so I'm probably not representative of the norm.
My account is AdamInAZ if anyone wants to check it out. I know I only have 1 pic right now, but I'm going to try and get some more this weekend.
Is there a certain amount of time you guys usually wait before moving in with a bf/gf? Or does it vary depending on whenever it "feels right" with that person?
No personal experience on this front, but one of my best friends described how she moved in with her husband within 3 months of starting to date him and never felt like it was too soon for it. So ideally it should be based on feel.
Another friend also moved in really early with someone she got engaged to. It mostly worked out despite that it was more a desperation thing with her, him, and another friend being close to broke (she had just moved to Seattle with no college degree, he worked at the docks, and the friend worked on various boats when such work was available). Then he came out of the closet after about a decade and while she was supportive of that, the actual breakup got really ugly due to personalities involved.
It's by the feeling but to me it would be somewhere close to 1 year of dating maybe a bit less, depending on the ideal time to move (leases n stuff). It gives you time to get past the honeymoon phase and get to know the person a bit better, the good and the less good.
It's by the feeling but to me it would be somewhere close to 1 year of dating maybe a bit less, depending on the ideal time to move (leases n stuff). It gives you time to get past the honeymoon phase and get to know the person a bit better, the good and the less good.
It definitely accelerates things. You could find out that you're a great match in a short period of time. If you're not a great match you'll find that out, too. It some ways it's nice to figure that stuff out quick, but I can see how creating these sort of entanglements would make the demise of a relationship that much worse.
Also has to do with money. I know my roommate was all gung-ho to move out with his girlfriend he met in October (our leases are up this August) but he's got a lot of debt and decided his current situation of just going off to see her a few nights out of the week was good enough for another year. Although he's not at all a homebody, i'd want to move in instead of going out like that almost every night, unless there was a financial barrier to doing so.
Posts
I am looking for a new friend, would you like to text? I am in Tucson now. My number is 1234567, text me if `y ou like,
I have private pics.
...dammit, I gave my bots away again didn't I?
But I just got out of a "my entire adult life" relationship. I don't want to start being exclusively attached to another person a month into my experience being single. And I mean I really like these people, but there's no future where I can make all of them happy by being with them exclusively. So I need to focus on right now.
But anyway, the person I spoke to tonight said that as long as we check in and update, they're cool with it. I'm seeing people once a week, and I'm making certain to let everyone know what is going on.
It's complex. But I'd rather deal with complexity and honesty than going behind anyone's back just because it was less awkward for me personally. Also frankly they all seem to be willing to put up with complexity in order to kiss my extremely cute face after I've finished cooking for them.
My dad recently broke up with this girl he was kinda seeing for about 2 years (lots of favors were done for each other, we helped rearrange furniture in her house, she introduced me to her daughter that worked at a state agency and put my name forward after I submitted my paperwork, my dad spent some time with her adult son), but she told him that she was still kinda seeing other people as well so my dad broke it off.
I mean I can understand his reasonings and where he's coming from though.
I do have a much better follow up story that I'll post later though.
Should probably text her now, no?
And yeah, thank her for a nice night out!
I still get like, super nervous beforehand. Then for the first 5 minutes I'm like oh man wait what if we don't have anything to talk about oh gosh
edit: it was great and we have so many things to talk about!
A good looking event was available Friday evening as well. Drat.
Meanwhile, in business news. PoF is now under The Match Group's control. They also own Match.com, OKC, and Tinder.
I thought these were all competing sites, I didn't realize one company was running almost the whole show. It's kinda weird that a complete shit show like Match.com is owned by the same people that run the perfectly fine and generally well recommended OKC. I wonder what their long term goal here is.
Hahaha. Nothing to talk about is still, and will always be, my number one fear. But with the right one, there's no such thing. Even a shared silence can be kind of magical.
Had a second date (the curse of only 1st dates is lifted!) last weekend. Another 9.5 hours together, same as the first. I really adore this girl. We played Tekken and Rainbow Six and I didn't have to let her win or hand her any kills.
The excruciating part? She's only just back on the dating market and doesn't want to commit again right away. She's scared of falling in love too quick and wants to take her time and make sure she makes the right choice. Fair enough.
Another rejection is a scary prospect, especially when it's from someone who very clearly likes me. But hey I like her and am not afraid to tell her that.
Maybe they will make PoF's interface better. No, wait, I was just at Match to see if I could find out anything about someone who messaged me (since I'm not paying them, I couldn't) and it is still bad as well.
Don't they also own Chemistry.com?
It is weird that they haven't consolidated any of these services. Also, probably a good thing because it means they aren't screwing up OKC.
And then they buy Ashley Madison.
I still remember seeing ads for AM on CNN or some other news channel.
It started off fairly normal with guy raging about how these dating sites for married couples and how "now there's Ashley Madison which guarantees a discret affair? Let's put a stop to this now! *background sharters* Go to mymarriagematters.com!"
Looked it up, and yep, both sites were owned by the same company.
They'd have to bribe the hell out of me and provide free legal council in case of divorce for me to ever get married.
Well they likely would have enough knowledge of matching algorithms by that point to point you towards the most compatible lawyers, relationship counselors, and notaries in the area . . .
Steam Profile
3DS: 3454-0268-5595 Battle.net: SteelAngel#1772
I've never tried a poly relationship before
On the flip side, this lady I'd been messaging for a little while just put up a new main profile pic where she has a resemblance to my mom and now I can't unsee it. :?
That being said, it's official, I'm moving in with my girlfriend in September. Seems like end game material considering I'm transplanting to that most evil of places....San Francisco.
Battlenet: Judgement#1243
psn: KupoZero
Tinder was easier than I thought to set up and use. OKC took awhile. I may have come to the realization that I am pretty boring, wasting all my time with these video game things. Ill post a link to my profile for your amusement whenever I figure out how. user name is Lostinthought_31 if you can look it up that way. I would appreciate any tips you might have.
Not a good sign that where I am is one of the worst places for matches according to OKC. Apparently I need to move to Washington? I guess all the cool people are there.
Also, thanks everyone for posting your tips and experiences. I've been lurking for awhile until I thought I was dateable material and reading your adventures has given me hope.
I am super glad I experimented with it up here first now.
Ha ha ha..ha....ha....*hides bodies*
Battlenet: Judgement#1243
psn: KupoZero
I'm sure Kupo won't have to worry about that.
He's probably played enough Elite to put together a map of where he can get the best prices for each organ instead of dumping them all in one market.
Steam Profile
3DS: 3454-0268-5595 Battle.net: SteelAngel#1772
I went out with a girl who when I met her in person looked exactly like my best friend's girlfriend. She even had almost the exact same voice. Which is too bad, because she was actually pretty cool. But I couldn't shake the feeling that I was talking to my friend's girlfriend.
I'm pretty sure I could move in with my girlfriend (she owns a house so it would be the better move), unfortunately I currently live a 20 minute drive from work (even with bad traffic) as opposed to living a quarter tank of gas away and a commute that can last between 50 to 90 minutes. (She works from home so living in a small town isn't an issue for her)
Right now we're alternating weekends visits.
Yeah but currently we're long distance. Like LA to SF long. I'm functionally quitting my job and breaking my lease to do this...so it should be interesting.
Well of course. I can make my rent in two organ runs, mainly kidneys, but if I get time I like to focus on the major runs. Like hearts and minds...literally.
Also, how did you find out what my new job is?
Battlenet: Judgement#1243
psn: KupoZero
We're an 84% match! 88% on sex! 89% on dating! 100% on being straight males
Oh well. Good luck out there
I'm an 88% match with him, 87% on sex, but 53% on dating. :'D 90% on ethics though!
My account is AdamInAZ if anyone wants to check it out. I know I only have 1 pic right now, but I'm going to try and get some more this weekend.
No personal experience on this front, but one of my best friends described how she moved in with her husband within 3 months of starting to date him and never felt like it was too soon for it. So ideally it should be based on feel.
Another friend also moved in really early with someone she got engaged to. It mostly worked out despite that it was more a desperation thing with her, him, and another friend being close to broke (she had just moved to Seattle with no college degree, he worked at the docks, and the friend worked on various boats when such work was available). Then he came out of the closet after about a decade and while she was supportive of that, the actual breakup got really ugly due to personalities involved.
Steam Profile
3DS: 3454-0268-5595 Battle.net: SteelAngel#1772
Battle.net: Fireflash#1425
Steam Friend code: 45386507
It definitely accelerates things. You could find out that you're a great match in a short period of time. If you're not a great match you'll find that out, too. It some ways it's nice to figure that stuff out quick, but I can see how creating these sort of entanglements would make the demise of a relationship that much worse.