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Baby hiccups [chat]

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    Jubal77Jubal77 Registered User regular
    If Blizz can make the performance based matchmaking work in HOTS I will play the hell out of it.

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    ChanusChanus Harbinger of the Spicy Rooster Apocalypse The Flames of a Thousand Collapsed StarsRegistered User regular
    case in point dude just barged in here all

    can you show me how to do thing?

    i begin showing him how to do thing

    oh it's more than like three steps? never mind i'll have someone else do it for me

    god damn it

    Allegedly a voice of reason.
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    So It GoesSo It Goes We keep moving...Registered User regular
    She already peed on her dad during a diaper change and pooped in the middle of one when I had her diaper off

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    MazzyxMazzyx Comedy Gold Registered User regular
    On the bus back to the office. Just briefed my third secretary level person this year. That is still nuts.

    u7stthr17eud.png
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    nexuscrawlernexuscrawler Registered User regular
    So It Goes wrote: »
    She already peed on her dad during a diaper change and pooped in the middle of one when I had her diaper off

    chip off the old block

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    cptruggedcptrugged I think it has something to do with free will. Registered User regular
    Mazzyx wrote: »
    On the bus back to the office. Just briefed my third secretary level person this year. That is still nuts.

    Mazzy, they prefer the term "office administrator" now. Jeez.

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    Sir LandsharkSir Landshark resting shark face Registered User regular
    edited November 2017
    definitely post more parenting horror stories

    i need to smother my feelings of sentimental regret welling up at the sight of the miracle of new life

    whenever you are changing an infant there's a very high chance they will pee during the change, idk why exactly. combination of cool air and relief of pressure on their innards or what

    anyways, the way I learned this lesson: I take off #1's diaper, I'm rooting around for a clean diaper while he's being all squirmy, and he lets loose a beautiful arcing stream that lands directly in my mouth

    edit: every diaper change after that involved finding the new diaper before taking the old one off

    Sir Landshark on
    Please consider the environment before printing this post.
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    RobonunRobonun It's all fun and games until someone pisses off China Registered User regular
    Babby butts are irritated by the feel of a clean diaper, so they immediately correct the situation

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    SparvySparvy Registered User regular
    So hungry, waiting for sushi

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    RMS OceanicRMS Oceanic Registered User regular
    Yay SiG

    Yay Siglet

    Yay babby

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    BeNarwhalBeNarwhal The Work Left Unfinished Registered User regular
    Preacher wrote: »
    Ollie hiccuped a ton when he was a baby. That boy could not drink anything without getting issues.

    #1 would just occasionally vomit up what felt like a gallon of milk

    it was something straight out of a horror movie I freaked out so hard the first time

    from what I gather about 40% of parenting is things spewing out of other things

    The 'cement truck' story with my nephew is still my favourite

    He was maybe juuuust three years old, still in diapers anyway, and we were up at my mom's ex's place, having a bit of a family get together

    And he and another little guy were playing a game where they'd roll down a hill (like a log) and then race back up to the top

    What us adults didn't know is that my nephew had a full load in his diaper the entire time

    That full load + that perfect tumbling motion of rolling down the hill = just a nightmare

    It was everywhere, there were no survivors

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    RozRoz Boss of InternetRegistered User regular
    Roz wrote: »
    goddamn welfare queens, having babies just to get more agrees and awesomes from the government

    VH, we aren't the government. This is free market awesome and agrees

    Oh yeah, sure, like I'm not going to awesome the birth of a mod's child.

    It's not a "free market" if the GOVERNMENT is INTIMIDATING you to GIVE THEM YOUR AWESOMES

    I'm pretty sure there's no punishment for not awesoming or agreeing.



    I'm going to get infracted aren't I?

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    ChanusChanus Harbinger of the Spicy Rooster Apocalypse The Flames of a Thousand Collapsed StarsRegistered User regular
    definitely post more parenting horror stories

    i need to smother my feelings of sentimental regret welling up at the sight of the miracle of new life

    whenever you are changing an infant there's a very high chance they will pee during the change, idk why exactly. combination of cool air and relief of pressure on their innards or what

    anyways, the way I learned this lesson: I take off #1's diaper, I'm rooting around for a clean diaper while he's being all squirmy, and he lets loose a beautiful arcing stream that lands directly in my mouth

    i mean they can't know what they're doing right?

    but

    Allegedly a voice of reason.
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    So It GoesSo It Goes We keep moving...Registered User regular
    definitely post more parenting horror stories

    i need to smother my feelings of sentimental regret welling up at the sight of the miracle of new life

    whenever you are changing an infant there's a very high chance they will pee during the change, idk why exactly. combination of cool air and relief of pressure on their innards or what

    anyways, the way I learned this lesson: I take off #1's diaper, I'm rooting around for a clean diaper while he's being all squirmy, and he lets loose a beautiful arcing stream that lands directly in my mouth

    Hooray for girl anatomy :p

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    Hi I'm Vee!Hi I'm Vee! Formerly VH; She/Her; Is an E X P E R I E N C E Registered User regular
    definitely post more parenting horror stories

    i need to smother my feelings of sentimental regret welling up at the sight of the miracle of new life
    So It Goes wrote: »
    She already peed on her dad during a diaper change and pooped in the middle of one when I had her diaper off
    definitely post more parenting horror stories

    i need to smother my feelings of sentimental regret welling up at the sight of the miracle of new life

    whenever you are changing an infant there's a very high chance they will pee during the change, idk why exactly. combination of cool air and relief of pressure on their innards or what

    anyways, the way I learned this lesson: I take off #1's diaper, I'm rooting around for a clean diaper while he's being all squirmy, and he lets loose a beautiful arcing stream that lands directly in my mouth

    Good work, team.

    vRyue2p.png
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    hippofanthippofant ティンク Registered User regular
    Baby hiccups are terrifying, because you never know what might be following in behind the hiccup.

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    SparvySparvy Registered User regular
    Oy, I’m soon eating over here

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    cptruggedcptrugged I think it has something to do with free will. Registered User regular
    Once again, I say that all babies look like Winston Churchill.

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    Hi I'm Vee!Hi I'm Vee! Formerly VH; She/Her; Is an E X P E R I E N C E Registered User regular
    edited November 2017
    Hi I'm Vee! was warned for this.
    Roz wrote: »
    Roz wrote: »
    goddamn welfare queens, having babies just to get more agrees and awesomes from the government

    VH, we aren't the government. This is free market awesome and agrees

    Oh yeah, sure, like I'm not going to awesome the birth of a mod's child.

    It's not a "free market" if the GOVERNMENT is INTIMIDATING you to GIVE THEM YOUR AWESOMES

    I'm pretty sure there's no punishment for not awesoming or agreeing.



    I'm going to get infracted aren't I?

    Oh sure, they wouldn't be so blatant as to infract me for that.

    But they'd definitely trump up some charges for something minor later.

    Hi I'm Vee! on
    vRyue2p.png
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    GethGeth Legion Perseus VeilRegistered User, Moderator, Penny Arcade Staff, Vanilla Staff vanilla
    You cannot negotiate with me. I do not share your pity, remorse, or fear, @visiblehowl.
    Warned @visiblehowl (0 points for 1 week) for "Disallowed phrase: Prohibited phrase "trump""

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    Sir LandsharkSir Landshark resting shark face Registered User regular
    Sparvy wrote: »
    Oy, I’m soon eating over here

    by the third baby we stopped trying to peek down the diaper to see if there was any poop and would just stick our finger in and see

    Please consider the environment before printing this post.
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    Hi I'm Vee!Hi I'm Vee! Formerly VH; She/Her; Is an E X P E R I E N C E Registered User regular
    SEE?

    OPEN YOUR EYES SHEEPLE

    vRyue2p.png
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    Sir LandsharkSir Landshark resting shark face Registered User regular
    bahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhahahahahahaha

    Please consider the environment before printing this post.
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    RobonunRobonun It's all fun and games until someone pisses off China Registered User regular
    ours looked like Edward G. Robinson

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    AegisAegis Fear My Dance Overshot Toronto, Landed in OttawaRegistered User regular
    Well done, vh.

    We'll see how long this blog lasts
    Currently DMing: None :(
    Characters
    [5e] Dural Melairkyn - AC 18 | HP 40 | Melee +5/1d8+3 | Spell +4/DC 12
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    So It GoesSo It Goes We keep moving...Registered User regular
    Ben brode is so cute

    He's basically DMing for the crowd for his hearthstone segment

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    navgoosenavgoose Registered User regular
    My kids are on surprise vacation with grandparents. At Harry Potterland today and just got Elder Wands.

    I'm p jelly.

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    RMS OceanicRMS Oceanic Registered User regular
    Yay

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    cptruggedcptrugged I think it has something to do with free will. Registered User regular
    The Geth terminator style lines spoken by the the Tinkles AV are amazing.

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    RozRoz Boss of InternetRegistered User regular
    definitely post more parenting horror stories

    i need to smother my feelings of sentimental regret welling up at the sight of the miracle of new life

    whenever you are changing an infant there's a very high chance they will pee during the change, idk why exactly. combination of cool air and relief of pressure on their innards or what

    anyways, the way I learned this lesson: I take off #1's diaper, I'm rooting around for a clean diaper while he's being all squirmy, and he lets loose a beautiful arcing stream that lands directly in my mouth

    edit: every diaper change after that involved finding the new diaper before taking the old one off

    also it cannot be understated that children are DICKS sometimes. And this is likely retaliatory for something

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    Jubal77Jubal77 Registered User regular
    So It Goes wrote: »
    Ben brode is so cute

    He's basically DMing for the crowd for his hearthstone segment

    Dudes voice doesnt fit dude to me though heh.

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    descdesc Goretexing to death Registered User regular
    Roz wrote: »
    definitely post more parenting horror stories

    i need to smother my feelings of sentimental regret welling up at the sight of the miracle of new life

    whenever you are changing an infant there's a very high chance they will pee during the change, idk why exactly. combination of cool air and relief of pressure on their innards or what

    anyways, the way I learned this lesson: I take off #1's diaper, I'm rooting around for a clean diaper while he's being all squirmy, and he lets loose a beautiful arcing stream that lands directly in my mouth

    edit: every diaper change after that involved finding the new diaper before taking the old one off

    also it cannot be understated that children are DICKS sometimes. And this is likely retaliatory for something

    He was pre-emptively retaliating for not getting his own Xbox

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    Havelock2.0Havelock2.0 Sufficiently Chill The Chill ZoneRegistered User regular
    Babies are pretty cool to visit but when shit gets real I'm happy to pass them off to their parents

    I've seen things you people wouldn't believe
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    navgoosenavgoose Registered User regular
    Diaper changes become a NASCAR style pit stop affair after a few times getting peed or pooped on while fumbling around.

    Also baby ward nurses are swaddle wizards.

    I still can't swaddle for shit after 2 kids.

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    ChanusChanus Harbinger of the Spicy Rooster Apocalypse The Flames of a Thousand Collapsed StarsRegistered User regular
    Babies are pretty cool to visit but when shit gets real I'm happy to pass them off to their parents

    i love my nieces and nephew and i will fight anyone but

    yeah

    Allegedly a voice of reason.
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    BeNarwhalBeNarwhal The Work Left Unfinished Registered User regular
    Babies are pretty cool to visit but when shit gets real I'm happy to pass them off to their parents

    My brother had a bunch of people over with their kids on Halloween to get some food in their bellies before they all went trick-or-treating

    I think 8 kids in the house, probably 12 adults, entirely too many people for me anyway :P

    And I introduce myself as my brother's brother and therefore my nephew's uncle, and one of the dads asks me if I have kids of my own

    Which first of all, bit personal, random stranger, but alright

    But I shook my head and said "Ohhh no, I'm quite happy with this uncling situation. I have a kid on a very, very part-time basis, and that suits me fine."

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    Hi I'm Vee!Hi I'm Vee! Formerly VH; She/Her; Is an E X P E R I E N C E Registered User regular
    oh my god this new overwatch hero

    vRyue2p.png
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    Sir LandsharkSir Landshark resting shark face Registered User regular
    lol this reddit comment chain all like "I've cried twice in my life, once when my dad died and once when I got home from deployment and met my 5 month old daughter for the first time"

    meanwhile in my head im like, "well there was that really touching Pampers commercial, and also that scene in Modern Family where Jay and Phil really bonded in a father-son moment, and also I watched UP again last week"

    Please consider the environment before printing this post.
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    descdesc Goretexing to death Registered User regular
    I still remember someone insisting to me that little boys were "weird" when you changed their diapers

    I asked how and she said "like," and made a weird scheming pervert face

    I said something like "babies don't even know what words are, are you sure you're not projecting"

    But she insisted baby boys are like, showing off their penises in a somehow mischevious manner

    People are mad doubtful sometimes

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    A Kobold's KoboldA Kobold's Kobold He/Him MississippiRegistered User regular
    Kids continue to be something I wouldn't be able to handle very well.

    Switch Friend Code: SW-3011-6091-2364
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