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Penny Arcade - Comic - Order

DogDog Registered User, Administrator, Vanilla Staff admin
edited May 2018 in The Penny Arcade Hub

imagePenny Arcade - Comic - Order

Videogaming-related online strip by Mike Krahulik and Jerry Holkins. Includes news and commentary.

Read the full story here


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Posts

  • TubeTube Registered User admin
    I would like to make it known that Jerry looks upon my own desk with a kind of dawning horror.

  • Skull2185Skull2185 Registered User regular
    Why would you back a desk organizer? If you want one, just go to Target or whatever and buy one.

    Everyone has a price. Throw enough gold around and someone will risk disintegration.
  • KalTorakKalTorak One way or another, they all end up in the Undercity.Registered User regular
    I remember old podcast references to "donutite," the mineral-like substance formed by donuts fossilizing on Jerry's desk with a single bite missing.

  • YoungFreyYoungFrey Registered User regular
    Tube wrote: »
    I would like to make it known that Jerry looks upon my own desk with a kind of dawning horror.

    Is it because your desk is bad in the same way as Jerry's, but worse?
    Or is it because your desk so intensely organized that Jerry can't fathom a mind that would produce it?

  • MichaelLCMichaelLC In what furnace was thy brain? ChicagoRegistered User regular
    edited May 2018
    Skull2185 wrote: »
    Why would you back a desk organizer? If you want one, just go to Target or whatever and buy one.

    You can't find your car keys to drive to Target, of course.

    MichaelLC on
  • TubeTube Registered User admin
    YoungFrey wrote: »
    Tube wrote: »
    I would like to make it known that Jerry looks upon my own desk with a kind of dawning horror.

    Is it because your desk is bad in the same way as Jerry's, but worse?
    Or is it because your desk so intensely organized that Jerry can't fathom a mind that would produce it?

    I submit that mine is worse because it also contains various types of dog food.

  • PreacherPreacher Registered User regular
    Man and here I thought my spartan desk at work was bad when I have a small food bowl.

    I would like some money because these are artisanal nuggets of wisdom philistine.

    pleasepaypreacher.net
  • SadgasmSadgasm Deluded doodler A cold placeRegistered User regular
    Alas, a desk organizer cant solve the pre-existing condition of "who gives a crap". It'll just be another addition of junk to the larger bog of junk

  • PreacherPreacher Registered User regular
    Sadgasm wrote: »
    Alas, a desk organizer cant solve the pre-existing condition of "who gives a crap". It'll just be another addition of junk to the larger bog of junk

    Haven't you ever tried in vain at a large project with a small measure? like buying some new hangers for your closet when you shove all your clothes in your dresser anyway?

    I would like some money because these are artisanal nuggets of wisdom philistine.

    pleasepaypreacher.net
  • DelzhandDelzhand Registered User, Transition Team regular
    Skull2185 wrote: »
    Why would you back a desk organizer? If you want one, just go to Target or whatever and buy one.

    Especially a $150 desk organizer.
    I always think that it’s not having an effect on my ability to think about shit, but every few months it gets cleaned and energy courses through my body, granting clarity and obliterating disease. SO maybe I’m wrong

    See, Jerry's gotta be careful here. If you keep your desk clean, then you build up a tolerance, and you no longer get the same benefits from the cleaning frenzy.

  • SadgasmSadgasm Deluded doodler A cold placeRegistered User regular
    Preacher wrote: »
    Sadgasm wrote: »
    Alas, a desk organizer cant solve the pre-existing condition of "who gives a crap". It'll just be another addition of junk to the larger bog of junk

    Haven't you ever tried in vain at a large project with a small measure? like buying some new hangers for your closet when you shove all your clothes in your dresser anyway?

    Yes? I thought it was pretty obvious with the tone of my post that I do exactly the same thing as Tycho.

  • DarkPrimusDarkPrimus Registered User regular
    Tube wrote: »
    YoungFrey wrote: »
    Tube wrote: »
    I would like to make it known that Jerry looks upon my own desk with a kind of dawning horror.

    Is it because your desk is bad in the same way as Jerry's, but worse?
    Or is it because your desk so intensely organized that Jerry can't fathom a mind that would produce it?

    I submit that mine is worse because it also contains various types of dog food.

    Just because you don't like a new brand of energy bar doesn't mean you should feed it to your dog. :confused:

  • BursarBursar Hee Noooo! PDX areaRegistered User regular
    Until I saw the actual item in question, I thought that the comic was showing the cleared top of Tycho's desk rising out of a sea of filth.

    GNU Terry Pratchett
    PSN: Wstfgl | GamerTag: An Evil Plan | Battle.net: FallenIdle#1970
    Hit me up on BoardGameArena! User: Loaded D1
    Spoilered until images are unborked. egc6gp2emz1v.png
  • dennisdennis aka bingley Registered User regular
    Tube wrote: »
    YoungFrey wrote: »
    Tube wrote: »
    I would like to make it known that Jerry looks upon my own desk with a kind of dawning horror.

    Is it because your desk is bad in the same way as Jerry's, but worse?
    Or is it because your desk so intensely organized that Jerry can't fathom a mind that would produce it?

    I submit that mine is worse because it also contains various types of dog food.

    I think you tragically misunderstood what "eating your own dog food" means.

  • Golden YakGolden Yak Burnished Bovine The sunny beaches of CanadaRegistered User regular
    This is a very fun comic for people who have followed the podcast and for years have heard snippets and comments about the horrific state of Jerry's desk. The world 'donutite' was coined because of it.
    Tube wrote: »
    YoungFrey wrote: »
    Tube wrote: »
    I would like to make it known that Jerry looks upon my own desk with a kind of dawning horror.

    Is it because your desk is bad in the same way as Jerry's, but worse?
    Or is it because your desk so intensely organized that Jerry can't fathom a mind that would produce it?

    I submit that mine is worse because it also contains various types of dog food.

    That would definitely be a deciding factor.

    H9f4bVe.png
  • YoungFreyYoungFrey Registered User regular
    Tube wrote: »
    YoungFrey wrote: »
    Tube wrote: »
    I would like to make it known that Jerry looks upon my own desk with a kind of dawning horror.

    Is it because your desk is bad in the same way as Jerry's, but worse?
    Or is it because your desk so intensely organized that Jerry can't fathom a mind that would produce it?

    I submit that mine is worse because it also contains various types of dog food.

    Wet or dry?

    Open or closed?

  • dennisdennis aka bingley Registered User regular
    YoungFrey wrote: »
    Tube wrote: »
    YoungFrey wrote: »
    Tube wrote: »
    I would like to make it known that Jerry looks upon my own desk with a kind of dawning horror.

    Is it because your desk is bad in the same way as Jerry's, but worse?
    Or is it because your desk so intensely organized that Jerry can't fathom a mind that would produce it?

    I submit that mine is worse because it also contains various types of dog food.

    Wet or dry?

    Open or closed?

    Yes.

  • tastydonutstastydonuts Registered User regular
    Tube wrote: »
    YoungFrey wrote: »
    Tube wrote: »
    I would like to make it known that Jerry looks upon my own desk with a kind of dawning horror.

    Is it because your desk is bad in the same way as Jerry's, but worse?
    Or is it because your desk so intensely organized that Jerry can't fathom a mind that would produce it?

    I submit that mine is worse because it also contains various types of dog food.

    This is the kind of statement that warrants a picture of the horror.

    “I used to draw, hard to admit that I used to draw...”
  • Skull2185Skull2185 Registered User regular
    Looking up the actual product really improves panel 3 there. It's a modular thing with a bunch of different options to customize the organizer to your liking, and the only thing Tycho put on there is the phone holder...

    Everyone has a price. Throw enough gold around and someone will risk disintegration.
  • RatherDashing89RatherDashing89 Registered User regular
    The thing I need the very least to organize my desk is a slot for pens and post its. The only product I could buy that would deal with my desk situation is an indentured servant to go through my mail.

  • dennisdennis aka bingley Registered User regular
    The thing I need the very least to organize my desk is a slot for pens and post its. The only product I could buy that would deal with my desk situation is an indentured servant to go through my mail.

    See, my problem isn't like that. I don't need to organize post-its or pens. It's all the crap that I sit on my desk because it's the main flat surface in the area and I'm too lazy to go and put that particular thing in the place where it lives or should die in (if it has either).

    Some things currently on my desk:

    A mini screwdriver set
    A piece of paper with notes jotted down for Echo of the Wilds
    A game mat for the Catacombs Conquest kickstarter that just fulfilled
    A stack of cardboard sprue from where I punched out pieces for said game, and the stickers for the discs
    A useless cardboard insert from it that kept me from getting all the pieces in
    A big binder of photocopies of my grandfathers memoirs, which I was temporarily using as an iPad spot because of the angle
    An iPad, which was free from work but I never used it after the few days when I tried it out atop the binder
    A tube of chapstick, which has peppermint in it and therefore burns when applied to chapped lips
    An sculpey ashtray made and painted by my son (no one here smokes, but ashtrays are the natural byproduct of childhood artistic training)
    A tiny clipboard with a sketch I made for my basement remodeling job
    A stack of tax documents that I put there as they arrive so I don't lose track of them
    A bottle of medication for my kid that we wound up not using because he proved unable to perform the simple task of swallowing a pill and had to get one we could open and sprinkle in water
    Another tube of the same kind of chapstick because I thought it was different but we'd bought multiple
    A bunch of cds I was ripping
    A towel hanger that ripped out of the back of the bathroom door

    This is boring enough, so I'll stop. Oh wait, FUCK is that ANOTHER tube of that demonic chapstick? No wait, this is the GOOD chapstick but I had been ignoring it because I thought it was the bad kind.

    Anyway, I've left out most tech detritus, other than the iPad. That list would be almost as long. And then there's the tech that's supposed to go there.

    What I'm saying is that I don't understand where you people are finding room for the donuts and dog food. Do you have a second desk? Do you desks extend up and over and around you? Do your desks have basements?

  • DelzhandDelzhand Registered User, Transition Team regular
    dennis wrote: »
    Do your desks have basements?

    they're called drawers

  • tastydonutstastydonuts Registered User regular
    I have a can of emergency googly eyes on my desk. It is hidden by miscellaneous, but there when I need it.

    “I used to draw, hard to admit that I used to draw...”
  • YoungFreyYoungFrey Registered User regular
    This product is clearly for two kinds of person.
    1: People that are already very organized and just want some cool icon to communicate this to their co-workers/family.
    2: Highly disorganized people who'd like to believe there is a product they can buy that will fix that.

  • Jacob SingerJacob Singer Registered User regular
    Hehe, I looked up one of the "Gather" organizers. For $150 I could buy a second desk from IKEA.

  • dennisdennis aka bingley Registered User regular
    Hehe, I looked up one of the "Gather" organizers. For $150 I could buy a second desk from IKEA.

    Careful. That way lies madness.

  • rabidmuskratrabidmuskrat Registered User regular
    dennis wrote: »
    Hehe, I looked up one of the "Gather" organizers. For $150 I could buy a second desk from IKEA.

    Careful. That way lies madness.

    I'm pretty sure the gather product (at least at that price) is madness.

  • KalTorakKalTorak One way or another, they all end up in the Undercity.Registered User regular
    for that price and that name, the thing had better sprout little arms and put all my desk debris into itself automatically.

  • tastydonutstastydonuts Registered User regular
    edited May 2018
    dennis wrote: »
    Hehe, I looked up one of the "Gather" organizers. For $150 I could buy a second desk from IKEA.

    Careful. That way lies madness.

    I'm pretty sure the gather product (at least at that price) is madness.

    Yeah... wow that seems a bit steep for an "artisinal craft project." I mean, you can buy a plank, some pegs, and hot glue from a hardware and etch rows into it and then make this. Or if you're feeling really lazy artistic, just strips of velcro.

    tastydonuts on
    “I used to draw, hard to admit that I used to draw...”
  • DarkewolfeDarkewolfe Registered User regular
    As far as I can tell, the Gather product is just a bunch of various cups. But instead of being able to put the cups on your desk, they're super-glued to the desk and it's now "modular."

    Also this wouldn't help my desk situation anyway. My problem is that I don't work well in paper, everything is digital, but I still end up with a ton of printed stuff. So my desk at work is just mounds of printed projects, stacked semi chronologically around.

    What is this I don't even.
  • lionheartssjlionheartssj Bartertown Chief Merchant BartertownRegistered User regular
    Got a heavy chuckle from this one. As someone who is crippled by a need to organize I've said this very phrase in the face of chaos.

  • This content has been removed.

  • dennisdennis aka bingley Registered User regular
    Darkewolfe wrote: »
    As far as I can tell, the Gather product is just a bunch of various cups. But instead of being able to put the cups on your desk, they're super-glued to the desk and it's now "modular."

    I may be misunderstanding you using "super-glued" as a metaphor, but from watching their video they're all attached with magnets. Both the cups and the extra bases you attach to each other. So it's modular in the sense that you can rearrange/add/subtract bases or cups however you want.

    It basically just boils down to the old "a place for everything and everything in its place." But, again, see my list above. Most of my stuff is so ad hoc you'd never plan for it to have a place, much less find it feasible to have a container that is customized to its dimensions.

  • TubeTube Registered User admin
    Having seen Elyssa’s, I don’t think it will solve any of my specific problems

  • YoungFreyYoungFrey Registered User regular
    The real product I could possibly make use of (but it'd be a jillion dollars) is a whole desktop sized one. So I cold slot all my parts in where I want them, and not need to raise them up off the desk. Of course that desk would get so gnarly with dirt and food bits. So so many poppy seeds.

    I bet just the ordinary Gather will end up getting pretty gunked up too. Not as bad as a keyboard gets, but there will still need to be regular times you strip out the modules and scrape and shake all the sesame seeds, nail clippings, and hair out .

  • HevachHevach Registered User regular
    Sadgasm wrote: »
    Alas, a desk organizer cant solve the pre-existing condition of "who gives a crap". It'll just be another addition of junk to the larger bog of junk

    Every year or two, my wife buys me a new desk organizer for father's day. Each time, part of the "gift" is organizing my desk for me. Deep under the remote controls, empty wrappers, kids' toys, old mice, lost thumb drives, not to mention the stuff SHE leaves there with it all, she finds the previous desk organizer, usually still stocked with supplies we assume we were out of and bought more, leaving the box they came in sitting on top of the stack of DVD's in the corner.

  • dennisdennis aka bingley Registered User regular
    I've actually pondered that the best desk organizer for me would be to not have a desk. I need the bare minimum that can hold a monitor, KVM, laptop, keyboard tray, etc. No desk space beyond that, as it just absorbs debris like fleece absorbs pet hair.

  • Hahnsoo1Hahnsoo1 Make Ready. We Hunt.Registered User, Moderator, Administrator admin
    dennis wrote: »
    I've actually pondered that the best desk organizer for me would be to not have a desk. I need the bare minimum that can hold a monitor, KVM, laptop, keyboard tray, etc. No desk space beyond that, as it just absorbs debris like fleece absorbs pet hair.
    If you stack everything in piles on the floor, you won't ever have a cluttered desk!

    rollsafe.jpg

    8i1dt37buh2m.png
  • dennisdennis aka bingley Registered User regular
    edited May 2018
    Hahnsoo1 wrote: »
    dennis wrote: »
    I've actually pondered that the best desk organizer for me would be to not have a desk. I need the bare minimum that can hold a monitor, KVM, laptop, keyboard tray, etc. No desk space beyond that, as it just absorbs debris like fleece absorbs pet hair.
    If you stack everything in piles on the floor, you won't ever have a cluttered desk!

    rollsafe.jpg

    I think what folks like us need are a ...different kind of desk. Let's call it Boxr. You insert a Boxi (special cardboard box size that only Boxr sells) into the patented Boxi Well. All your crap goes into the Boxi. At the end of a year/quarter/month/week, you remove the Boxi from the Boxi Well and attach the Boxi Binder (packaging tape). Insert a new Boxi and you're ready to be productive for the next year/quarter/month/week!

    For an additional subscription, you can house your collection of Boxi at the Big Boxi (long term storage facility) or have them picked up by the Boxr Buddies (garbage collectors).

    (Now I really want someone to make a fake Kickstarter for this.)

    dennis on
  • H3KnucklesH3Knuckles But we decide which is right and which is an illusion.Registered User regular
    edited May 2018
    According to my dad, my grandfather used to say that when you move, or rearrange things, or basically just any time you box up stuff, write the date on it. If you go over a certain amount of time (I think it was 2 years) without opening the box, you should just get rid of it.

    H3Knuckles on
    If you're curious about my icon; it's an update of the early Lego Castle theme's "Black Falcons" faction.
    camo_sig2-400.png
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