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And how can you not be the guy that pays for everything? Is it not pretty much expected out of you? I don't know how many girls would be impressed/happy if when the bill comes, I just look at them and go "well?? Aren't you going to pay for your half?"
Funny story, dude and girl come into the ice-cream store I was working in, they get some ice-cream, girl pulls out her wallet to pay for her ice-cream cone, dude goes "no, I'm paying". Girl says "no, I can handle it". Guy says "no you can't, you're the girl and I'm the guy, that means I pay". Guy walks home alone.
Edit: Also, if you can't afford to take a girl someplace expensive, don't take her someplace expensive. If she expects to be taken someplace expensive for a first date, why the fuck do you want to go out with her in the first place? Girls don't like guys with entitlement issues, and you shouldn't like girls with entitlement issues.
If you ask someone if you can take them out, it obligates you to a certain extent. I wouldn't ask someone if I could take them to an expensive restaurant and then stare at them when the bill arrived, particularly given that a lot of the time the other party says yes, you choose the venue and then who knows if they could even afford it if they did have to pay? You insisted on bringing them out, so take care of the expected expenses. If you go out to coffee and take a walk somewhere afterwards and she's all "ooh, ice cream!" you're by no means to be all "let me pay for that!", just let her go up first and get what she wants and then get what you want if you're not comfortable paying for both.
It wouldn't hurt to pay for both, but you hardly should feel compelled and if she's acting like she controls your wallet on your date, you don't want her anyhow.
That noted, $60 for a date is not an insane amount of money to drop, but if you're going on them once a week, it's not going to add up too quickly and the first date isn't going to be one of the $60 dates if you have any sense whatsoever. Then, by the time you've had a second or third date somewhere nice you're probably up to the point where you should be comfortable saying "Hey do you want to go rent a movie and we can head back to my place to watch that?"
Now if you can cook decently at all, you can do that same $60 dinner for under $20 most of the time, pick up a decent bottle of wine for $15, and a movie for $5. So you're now spending $40 and let's face it, you're eating too, you're enjoying the movie too, and you're enjoying the booze too as well. And I'm willing to bet that if you have $300 or $400 in spending money a month, $40 for an enjoyable Friday or Saturday night isn't exactly out of line. You'd spend that much if you went out drinking with your friends anyhow.
Pheezer on
IT'S GOT ME REACHING IN MY POCKET IT'S GOT ME FORKING OVER CASH
CUZ THERE'S SOMETHING IN THE MIDDLE AND IT'S GIVING ME A RASH
Okay also I'll agree that after the first date, it's a lot more appropriate to start splitting the expense of things because let's face it, she's decided to start seeing you now, you're no longer asking her to let you take her out.
Pheezer on
IT'S GOT ME REACHING IN MY POCKET IT'S GOT ME FORKING OVER CASH
CUZ THERE'S SOMETHING IN THE MIDDLE AND IT'S GIVING ME A RASH
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whoops
Funny story, dude and girl come into the ice-cream store I was working in, they get some ice-cream, girl pulls out her wallet to pay for her ice-cream cone, dude goes "no, I'm paying". Girl says "no, I can handle it". Guy says "no you can't, you're the girl and I'm the guy, that means I pay". Guy walks home alone.
Edit: Also, if you can't afford to take a girl someplace expensive, don't take her someplace expensive. If she expects to be taken someplace expensive for a first date, why the fuck do you want to go out with her in the first place? Girls don't like guys with entitlement issues, and you shouldn't like girls with entitlement issues.
Works like a charm every time.
Or you pay for the lunch/dinner and she pays for the ice cream afterwards.
It's not about the money as much as it's about the gesture.
:^:
the "no true scotch man" fallacy.
It wouldn't hurt to pay for both, but you hardly should feel compelled and if she's acting like she controls your wallet on your date, you don't want her anyhow.
That noted, $60 for a date is not an insane amount of money to drop, but if you're going on them once a week, it's not going to add up too quickly and the first date isn't going to be one of the $60 dates if you have any sense whatsoever. Then, by the time you've had a second or third date somewhere nice you're probably up to the point where you should be comfortable saying "Hey do you want to go rent a movie and we can head back to my place to watch that?"
Now if you can cook decently at all, you can do that same $60 dinner for under $20 most of the time, pick up a decent bottle of wine for $15, and a movie for $5. So you're now spending $40 and let's face it, you're eating too, you're enjoying the movie too, and you're enjoying the booze too as well. And I'm willing to bet that if you have $300 or $400 in spending money a month, $40 for an enjoyable Friday or Saturday night isn't exactly out of line. You'd spend that much if you went out drinking with your friends anyhow.
CUZ THERE'S SOMETHING IN THE MIDDLE AND IT'S GIVING ME A RASH
CUZ THERE'S SOMETHING IN THE MIDDLE AND IT'S GIVING ME A RASH