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Best (Worst) Computer Advice

Richard M. NixonRichard M. Nixon regular
edited November 2007 in Social Entropy++
ITT we post the worst advice we have ever received re. computers or technology

In Grade 10 I was told by the head librarian (and sysop) at my highschool that an internet connection was like a door. The more you try to view/download, the wider open the door is forced, so it's best to have at least half-a-dozen windows open at any time to really maximise your connection speed.

chevy.jpgsteve.jpgmartin.jpg
Richard M. Nixon on
«13

Posts

  • redfenixredfenix Aka'd as rfix Registered User regular
    edited November 2007
    It's not a truck!

    redfenix on
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    SE++ Map Steam
  • tuggatugga Makin' movies Makin' songsRegistered User regular
    edited November 2007
    excuse me we already have a nixon

    tugga on
    66OoDuJ.jpg
    STEAM!
  • thorgotthorgot there is special providence in the fall of a sparrowRegistered User regular
    edited November 2007
    some kid in high school did not realize we were being sarcastic when we told him to delete his windows folder to free up some room.

    thorgot on
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  • AbracadanielAbracadaniel Registered User regular
    edited November 2007
    hey ds

    Abracadaniel on
  • Richard M. NixonRichard M. Nixon regular
    edited November 2007
    sup sh

    t tugga no you don't

    Richard M. Nixon on
    chevy.jpgsteve.jpgmartin.jpg
  • AbracadanielAbracadaniel Registered User regular
    edited November 2007
    not much

    got rockband

    eatin quiznos
    awm nom nom

    Abracadaniel on
  • GefahrMausGefahrMaus Registered User regular
    edited November 2007
    deltree *.* \y

    GefahrMaus on
  • AHH!AHH! Registered User regular
    edited November 2007
    My buddy was having problems with a computer he'd had for 5 years and I told him to realign the fan by smacking the shit out of it until it stopped scratching.

    he needed a new computer anyway

    AHH! on
    AHHsig.pngRandom Loveline | the Loveline archive
  • GefahrMausGefahrMaus Registered User regular
    edited November 2007
    I once, circa 1999, advised a friend that before shipping back the gateway that had givin him so many problems, he should crack open the case and take a dump in it close it up and ship it back that way....


    he probably shouldnt have taken my advice.

    GefahrMaus on
  • M.D.M.D. and then what happens? Registered User regular
    edited November 2007
    Yea, opening the case voids the warranty.

    M.D. on
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    Steam
  • tuggatugga Makin' movies Makin' songsRegistered User regular
    edited November 2007
    i always wanted to go in the library early in the morning, set goatse as the wallpaper, turn the monitor off and leave

    tugga on
    66OoDuJ.jpg
    STEAM!
  • RuckusRuckus Registered User regular
    edited November 2007
    When I was in Grade 11 I took a computer hardware course, this course was taught by the schools woodworking teacher, who suffered a mental breakdown halfway through the year.

    So you can guess how that went.

    Ruckus on
  • Wedge BiggsWedge Biggs Registered User regular
    edited November 2007
    Yeah, my father in law convinced my wife's gamer tower was slowing down due to viruses, and that the best anti virus is McAfee. I can't even delete it, since she just downloaded and paid for a non-CD version. So now she has to deal with pop ups, virus scans, and "Do you want to upgrade?" fucking up her WOW runs all the time. I could neuter the program suite so it doesn't do shit, but she has to learn her lesson. That and I want her to ask me to delete that version of corporate malware. btw, she didn't have any virii running amok betwixt her machine's nethers. Her fuckhead father had installed a jacked-up version of remote desktop on her machine so he could "diagnose her machine's problems" from home. Goddamn manpleaser.

    Wedge Biggs on
    I ain't never crossed a man who didn't deserve it. - Artis Ivey Jr.
  • Wedge BiggsWedge Biggs Registered User regular
    edited November 2007
    Ruckus wrote: »
    When I was in Grade 11 I took a computer hardware course, this course was taught by the schools woodworking teacher, who suffered a mental breakdown halfway through the year.

    So you can guess how that went.

    Hand-lathed oak computer cases?

    Wedge Biggs on
    I ain't never crossed a man who didn't deserve it. - Artis Ivey Jr.
  • tuggatugga Makin' movies Makin' songsRegistered User regular
    edited November 2007
    Ruckus wrote: »
    When I was in Grade 11 I took a computer hardware course, this course was taught by the schools woodworking teacher, who suffered a mental breakdown halfway through the year.

    So you can guess how that went.

    We were gonna guess anyway, we didnt need your permission

    tugga on
    66OoDuJ.jpg
    STEAM!
  • RuckusRuckus Registered User regular
    edited November 2007
    You guys should make new threads about it, or perhaps use img tags to describe your feelings.

    Whoops.

    Ruckus on
  • mcpmcp Registered User regular
    edited November 2007
    In high school, one of the teachers told me that the internet was slow on that day because more people than usual around the world were on the internet at that time.

    She taught the beginning and "advanced" computer classes.

    mcp on
  • Octopus MelodyOctopus Melody Registered User regular
    edited November 2007
    In high school I took some super easy computer class where you learned how to use MS Word or something. One day four computers had big signs on them saying not to touch them, they're out of order due to a virus. A friend of mine asked the teacher if he could mess with them since he knew something about computers. He discovered that each of them just had their mouse unplugged.

    Octopus Melody on
  • Wedge BiggsWedge Biggs Registered User regular
    edited November 2007
    Octopus Melody wrote: »
    In high school I took some super easy computer class where you learned how to use MS Word or something. One day four computers had big signs on them saying not to touch them, they're out of order due to a virus. A friend of mine asked the teacher if he could mess with them since he knew something about computers. He discovered that each of them just had their mouse unplugged.

    Remember how you'd go into the old computer labs and the mice had their balls removed? That was me.

    Wedge Biggs on
    I ain't never crossed a man who didn't deserve it. - Artis Ivey Jr.
  • potatoepotatoe Registered User regular
    edited November 2007
    sudo rm -R /

    potatoe on
  • RuckusRuckus Registered User regular
    edited November 2007
    Our school network admins had to enable AD group policies disabling the display properties because students kept trying to set their display to resolutions exceeding the monitor capabilities.

    Ruckus on
  • GrathGrath I'm a much happier person these days Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited November 2007
    Wedge Biggs wrote: »
    Remember how you'd go into the old computer labs and the mice had their balls removed? That was me.

    I wouldn't remove the ball I'd just put tape around it so it still kinda worked but very poorly. I'm more into long term fucking with somebody.



    one time somebody told me to check out this ctrl alt del comic, that was pretty bad computer related advice.. kinda.

    Grath on
  • RuckusRuckus Registered User regular
    edited November 2007
    Grath wrote: »

    one time somebody told me to check out this ctrl alt del comic, that was pretty bad computer related advice.. kinda.

    Same thing, but MegaTokyo.

    Ruckus on
  • Wedge BiggsWedge Biggs Registered User regular
    edited November 2007
    Ruckus wrote: »
    Grath wrote: »

    one time somebody told me to check out this ctrl alt del comic, that was pretty bad computer related advice.. kinda.

    Same thing, but MegaTokyo.

    You need new friends.

    Wedge Biggs on
    I ain't never crossed a man who didn't deserve it. - Artis Ivey Jr.
  • RuckusRuckus Registered User regular
    edited November 2007
    Wedge Biggs wrote: »
    Ruckus wrote: »
    Grath wrote: »

    one time somebody told me to check out this ctrl alt del comic, that was pretty bad computer related advice.. kinda.

    Same thing, but MegaTokyo.

    You need new friends.

    That was in highschool.

    Like five or six years ago.

    Ruckus on
  • AHH!AHH! Registered User regular
    edited November 2007
    When I was in a PC support class in high school the lead tech. dude, Mr. Wang, taught us, while holding a motherboard, that when you ship in hardware back to the company you need to make sure that it isn't working. He then promptly dropped the thing on to the tiled floor.

    He was the man

    AHH! on
    AHHsig.pngRandom Loveline | the Loveline archive
  • RuckusRuckus Registered User regular
    edited November 2007
    AHH! wrote: »
    When I was in a PC support class in high school the lead tech. dude, Mr. Wang, taught us, while holding a motherboard, that when you ship in hardware back to the company you need to make sure that it isn't working. He then promptly dropped the thing on to the tiled floor.

    He was the man

    Mine thought that you could attach a SCSI device to an IDE cable/bus if you had the right "Adapter".

    Ruckus on
  • mcpmcp Registered User regular
    edited November 2007
    One of the questions I had on a test in High School was to draw 3 examples of a smiley.

    mcp on
  • LardalishLardalish Registered User regular
    edited November 2007
    mcp wrote: »
    One of the questions I had on a test in High School was to draw 3 examples of a smiley.

    Internetting 101

    Lardalish on
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    Jordan of Elienor, Human Shaman
  • Wedge BiggsWedge Biggs Registered User regular
    edited November 2007
    Ruckus wrote: »
    AHH! wrote: »
    When I was in a PC support class in high school the lead tech. dude, Mr. Wang, taught us, while holding a motherboard, that when you ship in hardware back to the company you need to make sure that it isn't working. He then promptly dropped the thing on to the tiled floor.

    He was the man

    Mine thought that you could attach a SCSI device to an IDE cable/bus if you had the right "Adapter".

    http://shop.ily.com/C_134.htm

    Wedge Biggs on
    I ain't never crossed a man who didn't deserve it. - Artis Ivey Jr.
  • RuckusRuckus Registered User regular
    edited November 2007
    Wedge Biggs wrote: »
    Ruckus wrote: »
    AHH! wrote: »
    When I was in a PC support class in high school the lead tech. dude, Mr. Wang, taught us, while holding a motherboard, that when you ship in hardware back to the company you need to make sure that it isn't working. He then promptly dropped the thing on to the tiled floor.

    He was the man

    Mine thought that you could attach a SCSI device to an IDE cable/bus if you had the right "Adapter".

    http://shop.ily.com/C_134.htm

    No, vice-versa, and learn to url n00b.

    Ruckus on
  • XaquinXaquin Right behind you!Registered User regular
    edited November 2007
    I remember when I was about 11 or 12 and computers were just getting into schools (well public ones) (big ass IBMs with their glorious beige cases and tiny monitors), my teacher told the class every day that you had to wait for the computer to turn off before turning off the monitor or the monitor would break.

    Xaquin on
    Fixer Restorations -/- Satan's Wish List!!!!
  • JordynJordyn Really, Commander? Probing Uranus. Registered User regular
    edited November 2007
    mcp wrote: »
    One of the questions I had on a test in High School was to draw 3 examples of a smiley.

    hahahahaha, oh christ that's hilarious.

    Jordyn on
    thumbsupguy-1.jpg
    JordynNolz.com <- All my blogs (Shepard, Wasted, J'onn, DCAU) are here now!
  • RuckusRuckus Registered User regular
    edited November 2007
    Jordyn wrote: »
    mcp wrote: »
    One of the questions I had on a test in High School was to draw 3 examples of a smiley.

    hahahahaha, oh christ that's hilarious.

    Does the "suckin dick" smiley count?

    Ruckus on
  • JordynJordyn Really, Commander? Probing Uranus. Registered User regular
    edited November 2007
    if it's frowning, does it count as a smiley?

    Jordyn on
    thumbsupguy-1.jpg
    JordynNolz.com <- All my blogs (Shepard, Wasted, J'onn, DCAU) are here now!
  • redheadredhead Registered User regular
    edited November 2007
    internetologists like myself prefer the term emoticon, jordyn

    we feel it's less biased toward the cheerful members of the family

    redhead on
  • BelruelBelruel NARUTO FUCKS Registered User regular
    edited November 2007
    redhead wrote: »
    internetologists like myself prefer the term emoticon, jordyn

    we feel it's less biased toward the cheerful members of the family

    i really like this post

    Belruel on
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  • The GeekThe Geek Oh-Two Crew, Omeganaut Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited November 2007
    Ruckus wrote: »
    Grath wrote: »

    one time somebody told me to check out this ctrl alt del comic, that was pretty bad computer related advice.. kinda.

    Same thing, but MegaTokyo.

    EVEN MEGATOKYO?

    The Geek on
    BLM - ACAB
  • mcpmcp Registered User regular
    edited November 2007
    Lardalish wrote: »
    mcp wrote: »
    One of the questions I had on a test in High School was to draw 3 examples of a smiley.

    Internetting 101
    It was actually the highest level computing class we had in my high school.

    The teacher was a total fucking moron.

    She had a teachers aide that she slobbered over as the smartest person ever when it came to computers. Took the dude an entire school year to build a computer. I'm not even sure how that's possible.

    When I look at my high school education, I'm amazed that I'm not working at wal-mart or something.

    mcp on
  • redheadredhead Registered User regular
    edited November 2007
    Belruel wrote: »
    redhead wrote: »
    internetologists like myself prefer the term emoticon, jordyn

    we feel it's less biased toward the cheerful members of the family

    i really like this post
    I try my best

    redhead on
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