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AAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaahhh... (Martial Arts Thread, nsf56k)
Metzger Meister
It Gets Worsebefore it gets any better.Registered User regular
It Gets Worsebefore it gets any better.Registered User regular
Jet Li, star of movies such as Unleashed and Fearless. Knows several different styles of Chinese Kung Fu, but is a very peaceful man given he devout practice of Buddhism.
Jackie Chan! International film superstar and genuinely a funny dude. Famous for doing all of his own stunts and getting mangled doing them.
Despite the super-lame meme he spawned, this motherfucker right here is a bad, bad man. Founder of Chun Kuk Do, which is based primarily on Tang Soo Do. Won more World Karate Championships than any man in history, and almost whipped up on our next featured bad-ass in a spar, which is impressive considering the next guy is...
This motherfucker. This motherfucker right here is Bruce Lee. He was almost single-handedly responsible for the surge of interest in the martial arts in 1970's America. He once said "If I say I'm good, you'll think that I'm boasting. But if I say I'm not good, you'll know I'm lieing." Died tragically at the age of 32 from swelling of the brain. Founder of the martial arts style Jeete Kun Do, which is more an amalgum of styles than any one defining style.
So, this is a thread for discussing all forms of martial art! Boxing, karate, kung fu, MMA, krav maga, sabat, anything you like! This isn't limited to fists, my friends! Feel free to post pictures of dudes wailing on each other with batons, or batons tied together with stuff (known also as nunchuks.)
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the best martial arts style, though, is huc chung kun tao. This one dude guy savelli who practices it can kill goats with his mind.
Just goats? As awesome as that it is, a talent like that is going to hit a wall at some point
well, assumedly, he can kill people too
except, you know, he's never done it, because that would be illegal
Those cats were fast as lightning
In fact it was a little bit frightning
But they fought with expert timing
They were funky China men from funky Chinatown
They were chopping them up and they were chopping them down
It's an ancient Chineese art and everybody knew their part
From a feint into a slip, and kicking from the hip
Everybody was kung-fu fighting
Those cats were fast as lightning
In fact it was a little bit frightning
But they fought with expert timing
There was funky Billy Chin and little Sammy Chung
He said here comes the big boss, lets get it on
We took a bow and made a stand, started swinging with the hand
The sudden motion made me skip now we're into a brand knew trip
Everybody was kung-fu fighting
Those cats were fast as lightning
In fact it was a little bit frightning
But they did it with expert timing
Growing up, I couldn't get enough of Bruce Lee movies. Awesomeness.
Not recently. They say he never lost a fight in his adult life, and this is a guy who recieved dozens of challengers a day. True, most of them he could simply talk to, being that he was a fairly intelligent dude and a peaceful guy, but if they really wanted to go a round or two he'd bust them up but good... and then teach them what they did wrong.
I forgot Sonny Chiba!
Well, goats are smarmy bastards anyway and probably deserve it
Google-Tube or NetFlix the "Fight Science" series (Nat'l Geographic Channel, I think).
It's fantastic and real ninjas are awesome
Tony Ja
Star of the movie Ong Bak.
He does his own insane ass stunts, and utillizes muay thai to create some amazing fight scenes against some big, hard mother fuckers.
Fire legs? Check
Jumping through a ring of barbwire? Check
Jumping through two panes of glass without breaking them? Check
Running on top of an angry mob to get away? You better believe that's a check'n
man.
Tony Ja is a hell of a martial artist, but when your movie is out-plotted by Steven Segal straight-to-video releases, there is a serious problem.
edit: HOLY SHIT HE JUST FUCKING BLEW A HELICOPTER UP WITH A BOAT AND FUCKING DROP-KICKED A TRANNY THROUGH A SKY-LIGHT GODDAMN THAT WAS AWESOME NOW HE'S FIGHTING FOR GIANT DUDES WITH ELEPHANT BONES FUCK
Atatatatatatatatatatatatatatata!
second best is
HENCE WHY I MENTIONED ONG BAK AND NOT THE PROTECTOR.
Ong bak is a much better movie.
The dude is in everything.
Often as like "henchman #2", but still.
You know what works better, requires less strain, and is much more impressive? Kicking someone right in the head.
yes
There, I said it.
Doc if you heard someone saying they just harnessed their chi than break through a stone column, would that fulfill you?
Actually shooting works pretty good too. Make someone feel your presence from a mile away.
edit: I like George St. Pierre, actually, but seriously... c'mon.
No I'm serious, and I'm a huge fan of Bruce.
Now, play the hypothetical and give Bruce the same amount of time in training in ground fighting, then you have a different story, perhaps.
MMA is a pretty incredible amalgamation of fighting disciplines.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0KOW_QxtSXM
And speaking of Zatoichi: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YAt6NPzZhbk
Bruce Lee did know Jiu Jitsu though. Like, was taught it by a renowned master and such.
Did they "harness their chi" with a howitzer? Because that would be awesome.
edit: Also, Jet Li is amazing for being able to competently use a three-part staff.
I'm just saying if you watched someone back up their "harnessing chi speach" with a feat of superhuman strength, would you be happy
Bruce Lee made Jeet Kun Do. HE MADE A FUCKING STYLE
Jeet Kun Do is a bunch of different styles combined together.
So... no
no sissy Quebecois fag would put a hurt on bruce
headbutting is like the worst idea
The feeling of some dude's nose splattering against your forehead and a fresh bright-red gout of claret bursting from his flattened nostrils like the bloody spray of a hunted whale scattering your favorite brown hoodie with a spin-art like shotgun-blast of ichor is endlessly satisfying.
If you know how to do it right you can easily bust up somebody's nose and look totally hardcore doing it.