I just smile happily whenever I see anyone dipping their toes into RPGs or board games, because it's an amazing, rewarding, social hobby. It gives me warm fuzzies to help out.
Bel, one good way to round out a character is 20 Questions.
Its basically a bunch of questions that the player answers about their character and really fleshes them out well. It was originally in Shadowrun, but I have a version for D&D. I can post it or PM it to you.(Its a little long.)
When I DM, i usually have a story i want to tell. I break the story down into areas and events i want to use to drive the story forward. Once ive got those basic set pieces in mind i go from there. Alot of my games are from the hip as i tend to map out the area, decide whos going to be in that area, and then let the PCs actions dictate what occurs. I recommend avoiding a heavily scripted campaign. People tend to go off the rails, and resent being shoved back on them.
For instance the first night of our game the party had a simple job. Go to a local gang hideout (4 story run down apartment building), pick up a girl, and bring her back to the bar. Real simple, real easy. Except of course a rival gang had been paid to provide a distraction while some Knight Errant security guards dropped onto the roof. I had the entire apartment building mapped out. The rival gang out front had literally no interest in the runners, but they didnt know that. They ended up blowing out a wall into a side alley under a silence spell, and are running for it.
So now my heavily armed special forces are clearing a building that the players have left. Thankfully two make their test and glance down into the alley to see people taking off running away. Their target is disguised so they cant see her. However they rappel down and start chasing the party.
This led to the main fight taking place on a random side street i had to create on the fly. My maps of the other 3 floors of the apartment building were completely unused.
This week their job was to stage a riot during a promotion for a new simsense. I gave them three objectives. 1. the bigger the riot the better. 2. Lone starr has to come out of it looking horrible. 3. Knight Errant who is guarding the "star" has to come out looking great. The better Knight Errant looks the more they get paid.
This led to over two hours of planning on their parts on how to best accomplish these goals. They were so focused on the riot, they almost completely missed an enemy squad getting into position to kidnap the star Knight Errant was guarding. Half the party had already started to evacuate once the riot was well in hand, and noone had bothered to keep an eye on the limo. All in all poor bastards were running around the entire team trying to keep the riot going, keep knight errant looking good, and ensure nothing bad happened.
The biggest time sink, and most enjoyable thing for players is to give them a goal, with vague instructions, and watch them go. Sure any party is more than able to defend a town from a marauding orc force at the drop of a hat. Handful of orcs, couple rounds of combat, maybe half and hour to an hour of time eaten up. However give them a day to prepare and watch them spend hours working out what they have, setting up traps, funneling the orcs into kill zones, arming the populous, etc.
The more time they have to prepare the more time they are going to spend bickering over details. It also gives you time to plan based on what they do. While you referee the planning session you can change things on the fly. Does the party know how many orcs? Perhaps the ranger should go scout, if hes scouting that means he cant assist with something else. Is the fighter helping to build barricades, or get drunk?
All of this gives you more time as a DM to create a more vibrant world. The players have a vested interest in each house, barricade, line of attack, and part of the plan. So when the marauding orcs do exactly what they want they feel elated, when things go to hell they know they have only themselves to blame. When the party has to run and find their way blocked by a barricade they insisted on building its a lot better than a dead end alley they feel you created to trap them.
Well thats my time on the soapbox, hope some of this helped.
Alright, since there's interest from more than one person, I'll post it here.
Basically copy this and print it out for each player, have them complete it for their character. It will flesh them out a lot and give you some nice adventure hooks.
What was the character's birth name?
What name does the character use now?
Did the character choose his name, or was it a nickname or joke?
Gender:
What is the character's physical size and description? (i.e. skinny, short, average, etc.)
What is the skin color of the characters?
Hair?
How is it worn?
Skin?
Eyes?
Does the character need glasses?
What is the character's Ethnic Origins?
What is the character's general appearance(clothing, neat/messy, etc.?
Where was the character born?
What is the character's age?
What was the character's family?
Who were the character's parents?
What did the character's parents do?
What were their means of support?
Were the parents?
Married, Separated, Divorced , Single Parent, Other(explain)
What was family life like?
What was the family's social class?
Does the character have any siblings?(If yes, how many?) _____
Where are they now?
What do they do?
Does the character keep in contact with them?
Did the character even know his/her birth family?
If no, who or what was his surrogate family?
Is (or was) the character:
Married?
Spouses Name(s)
Divorced?
Ex-spouses Name(s)
Dating/Involved?
Signifciant Others Name(s)
Does the character have any children?(If yes names, and short descriptions about them?)
Where or how was the character educated?
Where did the character learn their skills?
Has character ever done anything else for a living?Yesq , Noq If yes, what?
Did the character ever earn mony or make a living doing something "legitimate"?
If yes, what?
Did the character enjoy it?
Why did the character stop doing it?
Would the character go back?
Does the character have any defined political beleifs?
If yes, what are they?
Is the character religious?
If yes, what religion does the character follow?
Was the character's family religious?
Are they still?
If they are( or were) what religion did they follow?
Did the character ever change religions?
Will the character kill other sentients?
If yes, when did the character decide that he could?
Does the character think that killing is acceptable?
Under what circumstances would the character kill?
Does the character have any opinions on moral issues such as capital punishment, abortion, euthanasia, if so what are they?
Does the character adhere to a personal sexual code?
Is this all the character ever wants to do?
Does he have any ambitions beyond the here and now?
If yes, what are they?
If not, why not
Does he plan to change things? if yes, how?
How long does the character believe it will take?
Is the character willing to wait that long?
What path led the character to their current position/occupation?
Does the character adventure for the:
-Thrill
-Money
-Freedom of it
-Oppose evil, if yes what evil
-As one step of a personal plan, if yes, what is the personal plan?
-As a political statement, if yes, what?
Would any event or circumstances make the character ever stop adventuring?
If yes, what?
What is the character's personality?
What special qualities does the character possess?
(this does not necessarily refer to skills, but to what the character does well. Does he get along well with people? Is he skilled at taking care of business? Prioritizing tasks? Planning ahead?)
Are there things that the character just cannot do?
(Get close to people? Perceive himself realistically? Work well with others? Think clearly under stress? Handle money well?)
What does the character hate?
(The noble class/royals? Orks? Undead? Adventuring? Personal Questions? Sentimentality? The church? her family? Certain people? Society in general?)
Now, I have to put in my opinion here. Sure, knowledge of the characters past is a good basis to build his goals and personality from. Some players enjoy spending an hour or two answering this kind of question, but others do not.
The basic questions about a characters background and personality are very good tools to make the outline of a character, that the players can then build on as the campaign progresses. A huge list of 20+ questions should be considered optional though.
I am not saying that you should not show them the list Theidar posted, but for beginners to roleplaying it might be too much to expect them to fill it out.
The list is totally optional, but it helps the players think more about their characters and flesh them out. Most players I've had actually enjoy doing the questions.
I've found that personally, I like to create the mechanics/ numbers of the character, and usually only go into a very basic concept RP-wise for them. Then as I play the character, I develop them further. Sort of feel the character out before I set them into stone. This may work for your players, it may not.
was supposed to run my first dungeon tonight, but one of the players flaked out so we're planning for nest saturday. but with the other two i ran a really loose make it up as i go along role play session, combat free, mostly them just exploring a world i created as they explored it, to see where we would end up, and it was so much fun.
towards the end of it, the player that had never touched tabletop roleplay before was really starting to get a feel for how it all works, and things started to click, and their characters started to really show and it was awesome.
i have a question for you DM's that make your own dungeons, i have had a difficult time working out treasure gains, and i think i just keep reading something wrong somehow, because how can a battle against lvl one creatures when you're level 1 also end up with the players getting approximately 300gp from the fight? it just seems like a whole lot of gold to be taking from a small band of kobolds.
was supposed to run my first dungeon tonight, but one of the players flaked out so we're planning for nest saturday. but with the other two i ran a really loose make it up as i go along role play session, combat free, mostly them just exploring a world i created as they explored it, to see where we would end up, and it was so much fun.
towards the end of it, the player that had never touched tabletop roleplay before was really starting to get a feel for how it all works, and things started to click, and their characters started to really show and it was awesome.
i have a question for you DM's that make your own dungeons, i have had a difficult time working out treasure gains, and i think i just keep reading something wrong somehow, because how can a battle against lvl one creatures when you're level 1 also end up with the players getting approximately 300gp from the fight? it just seems like a whole lot of gold to be taking from a small band of kobolds.
any tips on treasure distribution?
while every encounter is worth a certain amount of gold, every encounter doesn't need to reward that gold. The players just need that much gold per encounter overall, you could lump it all into a big treasure at the end of an encounter for instance, or have an NPC offer it to the players as a reward for going on a quest.
keep a running total of what the PCs should have and what they do have, and try to keep them close basically. Don't forget items and gear count as gold too.
ok, so i could have them find like 20sp on a kobold, maybe a few golds and gems, then at the end i would have calculated the gp for all the encounters, and maybe i could give them a +1 longsword or something?
that way they aren't looting 300gp off of a group of 4 or 5 kobolds, because that is silly.
ok, so i could have them find like 20sp on a kobold, maybe a few golds and gems, then at the end i would have calculated the gp for all the encounters, and maybe i could give them a +1 longsword or something?
that way they aren't looting 300gp off of a group of 4 or 5 kobolds, because that is silly.
If playing Shadowrun, either have the decker isolated from the other players, or give him his own screen.
It just breeeds paranoia.
Especially if you make random expressions at him every now and then, just sparsely dotted throughout.
I know this one guy who GM'd SR and since everyone had laptops, and he was learning how to make websites... Well, he had his own little Shadowland BBS, and man, Secrets From The Future and Crime Spree are really the greatest soundtracks for Deckers.
For general GMing, I suggest you start simple, kobold, bandits(or better yet, if playing Greyhawk, some followers of Iuz), angry, paranoid farmers with pitchforks and knives, and one very confused "noble".
ok, so i could have them find like 20sp on a kobold, maybe a few golds and gems, then at the end i would have calculated the gp for all the encounters, and maybe i could give them a +1 longsword or something?
that way they aren't looting 300gp off of a group of 4 or 5 kobolds, because that is silly.
Shit, for a kobold, 20sp is probably the inheritance from their rich uncle.
If they were the only person in the will.
EDIT: You now must incorporate a rich kobold uncle somehow. I don't care how. Just do it.
ok, so i could have them find like 20sp on a kobold, maybe a few golds and gems, then at the end i would have calculated the gp for all the encounters, and maybe i could give them a +1 longsword or something?
that way they aren't looting 300gp off of a group of 4 or 5 kobolds, because that is silly.
The Kobolds could have hit it big when some rich noble got caught in the woods alone, waiting for his one true love.
tastydonuts on
“I used to draw, hard to admit that I used to draw...”
hahaha, rich kobold uncle sounds like it'd be a really confusing thing to add in, and my players would be very 'O_o'
It really depends on you. For example, some of the most powerful random items that I've put in my game have been absurd like that.
Hot pants that gave bonuses to social skills (dip/bluff/intim), provided they were worn on the outside and clearly visible to others where did they get spandex?. The player that wound up wearing them was a halfling...
A two-handed orcish ladle that dealt sub-dual damage and had a 5' knock-back on hit (I forget the name of the enchantment)... power attack whoring made it get removed though. But they knew that was coming.
It's ok to go nuts and add humour. :P
tastydonuts on
“I used to draw, hard to admit that I used to draw...”
hahaha, we're getting a few more people, i think i might throw in a pair of magic hotpants somewhere.
anyone else ever made up great items like that?
Belruel on
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JacobkoshGamble a stamp.I can show you how to be a real man!Moderatormod
edited May 2008
One of my parties had the "Braveheart sword" - a magic sword whose only magic was that if you threw it into the air before a battle (preferably while shouting FREEEEEDOM or similar), it invariably landed in the ground point-down, and a breeze sprung up to make the colored tassels tied to the hilt flap about. It never failed to inspire us to greatness.
hahaha, we're getting a few more people, i think i might throw in a pair of magic hotpants somewhere.
anyone else ever made up great items like that?
i tended to make magic items that had no combat application.
i mean, if i was making magic items i would probably be like the ron popeil of magic items.
most people don't need a +2 frost burst sword.
but a broom that cleans up all by itself (essentially a dnd roomba) or a comfy bed that folds up to be the size of a book or a tiny golem that helps you put on your armor or a shirt that never gets linty?
that's money in the bank... that's forgotten realms home shopping network material.
hahaha, we're getting a few more people, i think i might throw in a pair of magic hotpants somewhere.
anyone else ever made up great items like that?
i tended to make magic items that had no combat application.
If you build it, the players will kill things with it. Or need I remind you all of the Drawmij's Instant Fortress commanded to collapse while being overrun with evil humanoids?
delroland on
EVE: Online - the most fun you will ever have not playing a game.
"Go up, thou bald head." -2 Kings 2:23
i made a small dungeon for their first adventure, and i am thinking at the end of the dungeons puzzle, they get an orb that glows strangely. its up to them to figure out that it glows stronger when...
a- bad dudes are nearby, like sting in the hobbit
b- a trap is nearby
c- or its just a light source
whats a good doodad to award them for their first dungeon that they will be excited about and everyone can get some use out of, but not be overpowered and such?
I mean, eventually, the orb would bring more encounters than it would avoid.
A party of kobolds shuffling around the road, some highwaymen, eventually have them in the house of someone they like, pass by his room, the orb should start glowing/playing music, repeatedly, getting stronger the closer it is to his bed.
Assasin under the bed, he gets one sneak attack to the shins of their friend as he lifts the cover off to find a rather sleepy snake, if the fight goes badly, have the assasin grab the snake, and throw it, only to have it coiled around and biting his wrist, for added comedic effect have the NPC get the snake and start talking to it, like a pet that he lost and was quite worried about.
if they can think of a way to kill an ogre using their tiny construct whose sole purpose is to help you get into your armor, they deserve the xp.
I'd give 1.25 the XP they would normally get, just because offhand I can't really think of a way to make that happen. :P
Ah. Have the ogre eat it so it tears its way out while trying to help you. Yes, the golem could get stuck in the ogre's esophagus, and it would have to somehow manage to disgorge it, or die from suffocation..
tastydonuts on
“I used to draw, hard to admit that I used to draw...”
lol. I used to put bathrooms in my maps, but after the party started to check them all, and/or stuff people in them... I'm thinking that was a bad idea.
tastydonuts on
“I used to draw, hard to admit that I used to draw...”
2nd edition was big on cantrips, especially when one DM ruled that you could use the Cantrip to grow someone's hair a few extra inches and it was used as a level one Save vs. Death spell when a particularly crafty mage used it to grow someone's nose hairs with it to tickle the brain.
It's even better now that it takes up a useless level zero slot. Prestidigitation>All.
if they can think of a way to kill an ogre using their tiny construct whose sole purpose is to help you get into your armor, they deserve the xp.
I'd give 1.25 the XP they would normally get, just because offhand I can't really think of a way to make that happen. :P
Ah. Have the ogre eat it so it tears its way out while trying to help you. Yes, the golem could get stuck in the ogre's esophagus, and it would have to somehow manage to disgorge it, or die from suffocation..
Throw the ogre some platemail thats two sizes to small and order the golem to "help" him into the armor.
Mmmmm Ogre hamburger.
Never said how strong the tiny golem was, muwahaha
I, personally, am greatly in favor of one shot magic items for low level players. It gives them a chance to play around with a bit of power, but there is no chance of it unbalancing your campaign. The default formula for that is Spell level × caster level × 50 gp. So that 300 gp encounter is a single use third level spell that is found someplace that is more realistic (the kobold tribe horde or something). Or a single dose of an oil that makes one party member's weapon act as a +1 flaming burst for 10 rounds/one encounter. Or maybe a bracelet that has a badger charm on it that allows you to summon a Celestial Dire Badger.
Edit: actually 300 would be a second level spell, not a third level spell. Same basic idea though.
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Its basically a bunch of questions that the player answers about their character and really fleshes them out well. It was originally in Shadowrun, but I have a version for D&D. I can post it or PM it to you.(Its a little long.)
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WISHLIST
For instance the first night of our game the party had a simple job. Go to a local gang hideout (4 story run down apartment building), pick up a girl, and bring her back to the bar. Real simple, real easy. Except of course a rival gang had been paid to provide a distraction while some Knight Errant security guards dropped onto the roof. I had the entire apartment building mapped out. The rival gang out front had literally no interest in the runners, but they didnt know that. They ended up blowing out a wall into a side alley under a silence spell, and are running for it.
So now my heavily armed special forces are clearing a building that the players have left. Thankfully two make their test and glance down into the alley to see people taking off running away. Their target is disguised so they cant see her. However they rappel down and start chasing the party.
This led to the main fight taking place on a random side street i had to create on the fly. My maps of the other 3 floors of the apartment building were completely unused.
This week their job was to stage a riot during a promotion for a new simsense. I gave them three objectives. 1. the bigger the riot the better. 2. Lone starr has to come out of it looking horrible. 3. Knight Errant who is guarding the "star" has to come out looking great. The better Knight Errant looks the more they get paid.
This led to over two hours of planning on their parts on how to best accomplish these goals. They were so focused on the riot, they almost completely missed an enemy squad getting into position to kidnap the star Knight Errant was guarding. Half the party had already started to evacuate once the riot was well in hand, and noone had bothered to keep an eye on the limo. All in all poor bastards were running around the entire team trying to keep the riot going, keep knight errant looking good, and ensure nothing bad happened.
The biggest time sink, and most enjoyable thing for players is to give them a goal, with vague instructions, and watch them go. Sure any party is more than able to defend a town from a marauding orc force at the drop of a hat. Handful of orcs, couple rounds of combat, maybe half and hour to an hour of time eaten up. However give them a day to prepare and watch them spend hours working out what they have, setting up traps, funneling the orcs into kill zones, arming the populous, etc.
The more time they have to prepare the more time they are going to spend bickering over details. It also gives you time to plan based on what they do. While you referee the planning session you can change things on the fly. Does the party know how many orcs? Perhaps the ranger should go scout, if hes scouting that means he cant assist with something else. Is the fighter helping to build barricades, or get drunk?
All of this gives you more time as a DM to create a more vibrant world. The players have a vested interest in each house, barricade, line of attack, and part of the plan. So when the marauding orcs do exactly what they want they feel elated, when things go to hell they know they have only themselves to blame. When the party has to run and find their way blocked by a barricade they insisted on building its a lot better than a dead end alley they feel you created to trap them.
Well thats my time on the soapbox, hope some of this helped.
Basically copy this and print it out for each player, have them complete it for their character. It will flesh them out a lot and give you some nice adventure hooks.
What name does the character use now?
Did the character choose his name, or was it a nickname or joke?
Gender:
What is the character's physical size and description? (i.e. skinny, short, average, etc.)
What is the skin color of the characters?
Hair?
How is it worn?
Skin?
Eyes?
Does the character need glasses?
What is the character's Ethnic Origins?
What is the character's general appearance(clothing, neat/messy, etc.?
Where was the character born?
What is the character's age?
What was the character's family?
Who were the character's parents?
What did the character's parents do?
What were their means of support?
Were the parents?
Married, Separated, Divorced , Single Parent, Other(explain)
What was family life like?
What was the family's social class?
Does the character have any siblings?(If yes, how many?) _____
Where are they now?
What do they do?
Does the character keep in contact with them?
Did the character even know his/her birth family?
If no, who or what was his surrogate family?
Is (or was) the character:
Married?
Spouses Name(s)
Divorced?
Ex-spouses Name(s)
Dating/Involved?
Signifciant Others Name(s)
Does the character have any children?(If yes names, and short descriptions about them?)
Where or how was the character educated?
Where did the character learn their skills?
Has character ever done anything else for a living?Yesq , Noq If yes, what?
Did the character ever earn mony or make a living doing something "legitimate"?
If yes, what?
Did the character enjoy it?
Why did the character stop doing it?
Would the character go back?
Does the character have any defined political beleifs?
If yes, what are they?
Is the character religious?
If yes, what religion does the character follow?
Was the character's family religious?
Are they still?
If they are( or were) what religion did they follow?
Did the character ever change religions?
Will the character kill other sentients?
If yes, when did the character decide that he could?
Does the character think that killing is acceptable?
Under what circumstances would the character kill?
Does the character have any opinions on moral issues such as capital punishment, abortion, euthanasia, if so what are they?
Does the character adhere to a personal sexual code?
Is this all the character ever wants to do?
Does he have any ambitions beyond the here and now?
If yes, what are they?
If not, why not
Does he plan to change things? if yes, how?
How long does the character believe it will take?
Is the character willing to wait that long?
What path led the character to their current position/occupation?
Does the character adventure for the:
-Thrill
-Money
-Freedom of it
-Oppose evil, if yes what evil
-As one step of a personal plan, if yes, what is the personal plan?
-As a political statement, if yes, what?
Would any event or circumstances make the character ever stop adventuring?
If yes, what?
What is the character's personality?
What special qualities does the character possess?
(this does not necessarily refer to skills, but to what the character does well. Does he get along well with people? Is he skilled at taking care of business? Prioritizing tasks? Planning ahead?)
Are there things that the character just cannot do?
(Get close to people? Perceive himself realistically? Work well with others? Think clearly under stress? Handle money well?)
What does the character hate?
(The noble class/royals? Orks? Undead? Adventuring? Personal Questions? Sentimentality? The church? her family? Certain people? Society in general?)
What does the character love?
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Behold the annhilation of the extraterrestrial and the rise of the machines.
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The basic questions about a characters background and personality are very good tools to make the outline of a character, that the players can then build on as the campaign progresses. A huge list of 20+ questions should be considered optional though.
I am not saying that you should not show them the list Theidar posted, but for beginners to roleplaying it might be too much to expect them to fill it out.
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Behold the annhilation of the extraterrestrial and the rise of the machines.
Hail Satan!
WISHLIST
towards the end of it, the player that had never touched tabletop roleplay before was really starting to get a feel for how it all works, and things started to click, and their characters started to really show and it was awesome.
i have a question for you DM's that make your own dungeons, i have had a difficult time working out treasure gains, and i think i just keep reading something wrong somehow, because how can a battle against lvl one creatures when you're level 1 also end up with the players getting approximately 300gp from the fight? it just seems like a whole lot of gold to be taking from a small band of kobolds.
any tips on treasure distribution?
while every encounter is worth a certain amount of gold, every encounter doesn't need to reward that gold. The players just need that much gold per encounter overall, you could lump it all into a big treasure at the end of an encounter for instance, or have an NPC offer it to the players as a reward for going on a quest.
keep a running total of what the PCs should have and what they do have, and try to keep them close basically. Don't forget items and gear count as gold too.
that way they aren't looting 300gp off of a group of 4 or 5 kobolds, because that is silly.
Yes.
It just breeeds paranoia.
Especially if you make random expressions at him every now and then, just sparsely dotted throughout.
I know this one guy who GM'd SR and since everyone had laptops, and he was learning how to make websites... Well, he had his own little Shadowland BBS, and man, Secrets From The Future and Crime Spree are really the greatest soundtracks for Deckers.
For general GMing, I suggest you start simple, kobold, bandits(or better yet, if playing Greyhawk, some followers of Iuz), angry, paranoid farmers with pitchforks and knives, and one very confused "noble".
Shit, for a kobold, 20sp is probably the inheritance from their rich uncle.
If they were the only person in the will.
EDIT: You now must incorporate a rich kobold uncle somehow. I don't care how. Just do it.
It's kobolds, though. Pretty much anything goes with kobolds. They are wacky.
Hot pants that gave bonuses to social skills (dip/bluff/intim), provided they were worn on the outside and clearly visible to others where did they get spandex?. The player that wound up wearing them was a halfling...
A two-handed orcish ladle that dealt sub-dual damage and had a 5' knock-back on hit (I forget the name of the enchantment)... power attack whoring made it get removed though. But they knew that was coming.
It's ok to go nuts and add humour. :P
anyone else ever made up great items like that?
i tended to make magic items that had no combat application.
i mean, if i was making magic items i would probably be like the ron popeil of magic items.
most people don't need a +2 frost burst sword.
but a broom that cleans up all by itself (essentially a dnd roomba) or a comfy bed that folds up to be the size of a book or a tiny golem that helps you put on your armor or a shirt that never gets linty?
that's money in the bank... that's forgotten realms home shopping network material.
If you build it, the players will kill things with it. Or need I remind you all of the Drawmij's Instant Fortress commanded to collapse while being overrun with evil humanoids?
"Go up, thou bald head." -2 Kings 2:23
i made a small dungeon for their first adventure, and i am thinking at the end of the dungeons puzzle, they get an orb that glows strangely. its up to them to figure out that it glows stronger when...
a- bad dudes are nearby, like sting in the hobbit
b- a trap is nearby
c- or its just a light source
whats a good doodad to award them for their first dungeon that they will be excited about and everyone can get some use out of, but not be overpowered and such?
any suggestions oh wise and sage dice rollers?
Christine wants one, Horseshoe. Make it happen. :P
I mean, eventually, the orb would bring more encounters than it would avoid.
A party of kobolds shuffling around the road, some highwaymen, eventually have them in the house of someone they like, pass by his room, the orb should start glowing/playing music, repeatedly, getting stronger the closer it is to his bed.
Assasin under the bed, he gets one sneak attack to the shins of their friend as he lifts the cover off to find a rather sleepy snake, if the fight goes badly, have the assasin grab the snake, and throw it, only to have it coiled around and biting his wrist, for added comedic effect have the NPC get the snake and start talking to it, like a pet that he lost and was quite worried about.
I'd give 1.25 the XP they would normally get, just because offhand I can't really think of a way to make that happen. :P
Ah. Have the ogre eat it so it tears its way out while trying to help you. Yes, the golem could get stuck in the ogre's esophagus, and it would have to somehow manage to disgorge it, or die from suffocation..
Magical Portable Outhouse.
Because seriously, you're in a dungeon for like eight hours and they so don't have clean restrooms there.
Do not turn it upside down.
Along with -10 to all charisma based checks involving people.
But +4 to all charisma based checks involving goblins or kobolds.
It's even better now that it takes up a useless level zero slot. Prestidigitation>All.
Throw the ogre some platemail thats two sizes to small and order the golem to "help" him into the armor.
Mmmmm Ogre hamburger.
Edit: actually 300 would be a second level spell, not a third level spell. Same basic idea though.