Great and Humorous Epitaphs
Black Ice
Charlotte, NCRegistered User regular
Charlotte, NCRegistered User regular
I used to know a few classy (er, classless) epitaphs - but alas, I forgot them many years ago, and Google is failing to supply me with entertaining epitaphs. I'm already planning on playing AC/DC's "Highway to Hell" and Young Jeezy's "Bury Me a G" at my funeral. Just like Biggie Smalls, I intend for my funeral to be a mother fucking party - I'm sick of those cliché, downtrodden and depressing ones. My loved ones will be celebrating the life I lived, not mourning the loss of it!
To match - no, outdo - my ballin' funeral service, I need a great epitaph - plus, I have a hunch that many others may benefit from such a colloquial exchange of ideas.
Pictures are welcome, as are plain text entries. To start us off:
As you can see, all I can really find are irrelevant, wild west epitaphs - often transcribed by acquaintances or complete strangers!
And before you begin.. I already know of this one:
To match - no, outdo - my ballin' funeral service, I need a great epitaph - plus, I have a hunch that many others may benefit from such a colloquial exchange of ideas.
Pictures are welcome, as are plain text entries. To start us off:
Here lays Butch.
We planted him raw.
He was quick on the trigger
But slow on the draw.
Here lies a man named Zeke.
Second fastest draw in Cripple Creek.
Toothless Nell's Epitaph wrote:Killed 1876 in a Dance Hall brawl.
Her last words: "Circumstances led me to this end."
He got a fish-bone
In his throat
And then he sang
An angel note.
1867-1946
“The defense restsâ€
As you can see, all I can really find are irrelevant, wild west epitaphs - often transcribed by acquaintances or complete strangers!
And before you begin.. I already know of this one:
Black Ice on
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Beloved Husband and Father
1993-2082
1983-2456
Killed while saving his loving family from a horrible hyperspace explosion
Need some stuff designed or printed? I can help with that.
1981-2009
Explosive Rectal Prolapse
-Oscar Wilde
I am not french
gah big image
1991-2060
Snoo-snoo
hehehe
540s BC -August 11, 480 BC
Every Night He Dines in Hell.
that is superb
1990-1965
"The clocktower, doc! It gets hit by lightning!"
1990-2034
Great fighter pilot in the alpha centauri wars
Man did he suck a lot of dick"
and in small print below that
"no like seriously dude"
He tells the truth elsewhere, I swear!
PACK UP YOUR SHIT AND GET OUT
1987-2009
tried wooks fitness plan
1990-2078
Sucking Dick Bought This Tombstone
you haven't even started yet
you get one cheaper for pre-emptive purchases
Also when his friend Harry Secombe died: '"I'm glad he died before me, because I didn't want him to sing at my funeral." A recording of Secombe singing was played at Milligan's memorial service.'
kpop appreciation station i also like to tweet some
1991-1945
Multiverse theory is shit, seriously don't go back in time and kill your grandfather, shit.
His coffin was heavy as fuck.
kpop appreciation station i also like to tweet some
1989-2167 (?)
Do NOT open!
Died tragically rescuing his family from the wreckage of a destroyed sinking battleship
*1992 +1989
"You think he smells bad NOW..."
Hope to hell God has a sense of humor.