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[Glossolalia++] Leonines and Theresai and a Bear, oh My!
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Starring:
The Ten
Also starring:
Street-dancing Hooligan Rory Snow
Murderous Robo-Duck Terro Drake
Hip-Hop Hacker DJ Josh Cypher
Imaginary Badass Spaceman Ffips
Holy Gunman Locot Doutwood
Gentleman Pirate Jonathan Brickley
Karate Cook Mal
Sadistic Physician Dr. Karakov
Natenborn Freak Ziggy
Gang-bangin' Engineer Rigue St. Sampson
Seasons 1-9 now available on Hulu!
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[strike]Soundtrack coming... maybe? (Probably not)[/strike]
Soundtrack here!
GLOSSOLALIA soundtrack, volume 1
"Activating Emergency Brotocol."
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=02mdp2NVq9U
Scat-o-master?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4o_NIZcfINk
Waste-winged angel
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nUUGVVQjUNk
Speed vs. Dienederekahn AND Loeli vs. The Warplate
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=04QpInkz9so
Gary vs. The Skorokov as Speed and Matt race against time
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gRh87Zo25YM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w0m6uOdW-LI
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=02mdp2NVq9U
Scat-o-master?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4o_NIZcfINk
Waste-winged angel
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nUUGVVQjUNk
Speed vs. Dienederekahn AND Loeli vs. The Warplate
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=04QpInkz9so
Gary vs. The Skorokov as Speed and Matt race against time
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gRh87Zo25YM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w0m6uOdW-LI
[Map of the hitherto unnamed Wrathship]
[Map of Haven]
[Map of Signet]
THE LONG SUMMARY, FROM THE VERY BEGINNING
OUR STORY BEGINS with a group of heroes, consisting of Gary, Malkor, Eric, Matt, Dubh and Xitl being thrown off of a wagon caravan, having made some inappropriate remarks to the caravan leader. Shortly thereafter the caravan falls into a pit of shit, and as the group investigates, they meet up with Speed Rider. The group finds that the children of the caravan-driver have been kidnapped, and the party accidentally kills the remaining members of the caravan. The party explores the cavern of shit below the earth, meeting Lo'li the pedophile priest and losing Xitl in the process. On the other side of the cave they find the town of Starfish Cove, about which there were rumors of plague and other nastiness. Splitting up, the party has a few misadventures, including inventing techno and sexing up a gorgeous woman with a speech impediment and ursine ancestry. Malkor is killed, but on the plus side the party learns about a Scatomancer that has taken up residence in Pooroc Keep. The party infiltrates the keep, slaying his henchman. While Matt attacks the Scatomancer, the others explore a secret passage, where they discover an ancient Bearkin spaceship. Recognizing Gary the Bearkin as its natural commander, the ship admits the party, and they use it to battle the Scatomancer, who merges with the essence of the God of Shit. During the fight, two mancers, named Farth and Locth, and a stoner named Tommy, join the party. Speed finishes the enemy off with an entirely over-powered attack that has the unfortunate side effect of creating a rift in time that destroys the entire universe. Speed barely manages to save everyone by completely reforming the universe.
So! Now instead of fantasy we are in sci-fi. After saving the Starfish Colony from a Scat Adept, the crew of the Ursa Majoris takes off for a space rock where a high-profile ship-modder took residence. They find that the place has been ransacked by robots. One of the customers, a friend of a popular racer, managed to hide, so the crew does the sensible thing and takes him hostage, calling the racer for a ransom. The crew gets the shit kicked out of them by the racer's henchmen, and are saved when Speed challenges him to a race, which he wins. Because of this, Speed gains access to the biggest underground race there is, which is set to start in a week's time. Also, the good and bad members of the crew are beginning to notice that their moral choices are altering their appearances, and after some research learn that they are drawing cosmic forces, called Benevochlorians and Malevochondria, to themselves like magnets. Meanwhile, Gary passes out, and begins hallucinating an Urson woman who is urging him to track down an Urson pathway so that he can save the Urson race. They also discover Tomarli, a plant-like alien, drifting in an escape pod in space.
But that shit's boring! Speed enters into the race, where he meets Ytlkrek, a hot-headed (and hot) alien racer. While he's trying to hit on her, he's interrupted by the arrival of a massive warplate, controlled by a warlord AI called Dienderkahn. While Speed and Ytlkrek work together to smoke Dienderkahn on the track, the rest of the crew works to destroy his brain. Loeli transforms Dienderkahn into a timid, inquisitive AI named Oeliki, while Speed manages to edge past Ytlkrek to win the most difficult race in the Quadrant. Speed offers Ytlkrek a ride back to the warplate, and shortly after learns that apparently getting beaten finally got her hot for him and they have lots and lots of sexy (pretend) makeouts. Meanwhile, Gary acquires the Urson Pathway that was used in the race, and directs it to the coordinates that the Urson hallucination tells him.
The Pathway warps them to a distant galaxy, filled with a malicious dust that rends the warplate apart. Loeli just barely manages to download Oeliki into a robot before he's destroyed, and while Speed and Matt rush to save Ytlkrek the others fight back the dust to keep it from eating the Ursa Majoris. While the dust is temporarily kept at bay, the crew lands the ship at the Tehelikron, a planet-sized Urson space station. Inside, they find that the station has been maintained by a friendly group of aliens that were saved by the Urson long ago. They bring the crew to the central room, which is a massive cloning lab, which can be used to create a new generation of Urson. The Tehilikron uses the crew as a basis for the Urson, and unfortunately the evil members of the crew are the dominating factor, creating an army of Bear Nazis. An epic battle ensues, which results in the crew defeating the army. The Urson woman tells Gary that hidden somewhere in the universe there is something containing the data of the dead Urson race, which can be used to revive them properly. 4 clues as to its location where put on 4 different planets. The Tehilikron dissolves into dust, called Skorokov, and merges with the Ursa.
The first stop is an ocean planet, home to the ruins of an underwater Urson city. Speed and Ytlkrek scout ahead, and it suddenly appears that they've entered a protected and hidden Urson city. Speed takes his helmet off only to discover that he's actually still in the water, and narrowly survives drowning thanks to Ytlkrek. On the way back to the crew, Ytlkrek suddenly proposes to Speed, which he eagerly says yes to. Before they can tell the news to the rest of the crew, another Ytlkrek shows up, saying that Speed took his helmet off and died. She angrily calls the other Speed an illusion, and the two Ytlkreks get into a spat. The two are separated and watched closely as they explore the ruins, suddenly discovering the Psycho Whale, a monstrous beast that's been mutated by the Urson data. A fight ensues and the crew is victorious, flying off into space. Suddenly, Speed fuses with the core of the ship and immediately uses his powers to destroy the universe... again. The crew wakes up to find themselves prisoners of the Psycho Whale, who is currently feasting on Farth's brains. They manage to break free and defeat the whale, but soon discover that Speed actually did drown earlier, and that the one following them around was an illusion. Luckily Loeli is able to make a new one using the Tehilikron, and due to a bit of an accident he can now transform his racer into a suit of super-armor.
The next stop the crew makes is on Dubh's home planet of Kih'tan. The Kih'tanni people are locked in a constant struggle against SpaceSEC, the military force of SpaceGOV, the humano-centric governing body that controls the known galaxy. There they meet Thieresai, a genetically-modified military commander with a scar across most of her body and a lot of hate. The crew works their way to one of the last strongholds of the Kih'tanni, where they learn that their leader has taken the Skorokov they need into her body to become super-powered. She agrees to give it up if the crew helps her fight back SpaceSEC, a battle which ends in a climactic thrashing of Thieresai, who is arrested by SpaceSEC for warcrimes. The Kih'tanni leader keeps her word and gives the crew the Skorokov.
The next stop is a frozen world home to an ice elemental, a being of pure manceric energy that Matt hates for some reason. The crew destroys the creature and secures the Skorokov with little problem.
The final location the crew heads for is a human colony that's been mysteriously abandoned. The crew soon finds out why: Skorokov zombies have invaded the place. After lots of running, hiding, and shooting into vents, the crew manages to find the source of the Skorokov and merge it into what they need.
The four Skorokovs now united, the crew learns that the last leg of their quest to revive the Urson is the Dark, a large area of mysterious black space. Flying into it, the crew finds themselves in a surreal dreamworld, where their manceric powers are boosted exponentially. While exploring the mysterious place, called The Bloom, Speed goes a bit power crazy and almost kills himself when his manceric implant explodes. Fortunately he's able to create a prosthetic out of his racer. The crew continues onward into the Burning Tomorrow, where they're all separated and placed into personalized nightmares, each of which culminates in the meeting of an assassin hired by... someone. Each assassin is someone from the crew's past. Fortunately, Racer X, the assassin hired to kill Speed, is a double agent, and with his help Speed manages to rescue the others from the Burning Tomorrow. All the obstacles now overcome, the crew finds themselves at The Heart. They discover that this ancient piece of Urson technology is the source of all mancery in the universe, and that deactivating it to revive the Urson would destroy mancery, an act which would indirectly kill an untold number of people. On the other hand, The Bloom is slowly expanding outward, and will eventually consume the entirety of the universe. After a long debate, Gary deactivates the heart against the wishes of most of the crew. Matt immediately kills himself while the others stare on in silent horror. Considering that he has the only way out of the Heart, the rest of the crew resigns to continue being a part of Gary's crew, even though some of them harbor intense anger over what he did.
From here we cut to two months later. The Urson have become a massive force in Galactic affairs, their technology mostly making up for the loss of mancery. Humanity is somewhat frustrated with suddenly no longer being the dominant force, but there's little they can do about it. The crew flies off to Speed's home planet of Anyymaye as guests for his sister's wedding. After the wedding, the crew meets up with Dux, a massive bodyguard, and Foghorne, an alien from Toon Lunei that Speed is kind of racist against. They also meet with a newly resurrected Matt, who's under direct orders from Thieresai to watch Gary and keep him from stirring up any more shit. Here they find out that Speed's family is under pressure from a mob boss, and with little difficulty fuck him up bad. Speed learns that the loss of mancery has turned his idyllic world into one of depravity, and secretly plans with Matt to run away.
The crew happens upon a large, drifting ship with odd signals coming from it, and upon exploring it find it to be filled with pillow robots with powerful sleep-based weapons. While most of the crew clear out these robots, Speed, Matt and Ytlkrek steal the Ursa Majoris and fly away. They land on a small planet where they spend their funds on a new ship, and Speed and Matt almost immediately fall back into their old bickering ways as Matt tries to assume control of everything. Speed is approached by Thieresai, who is displeased with the performance of Matt and wants to hire Speed to watch Gary instead. Thinking of this as an opportunity to keep Gary from killing more people, Speed agrees. Matt gets stranded somewhere, alone and angry.
Now with multiple ships under their command, the crew splits up to investigate two separate areas. One half investigates the Tehilikron, which has apparently become haunted, while the other investigates a planet of hateful bug people that are oddly reminiscent of what the crew found in the burning tomorrow. What happens doesn't really matter, however, as the Tehilikron crew is suddenly met with a giant laser. The human military had been developing the Alpha Buster, the most powerful weapon in the universe, to try and trump the influence of the Urson, and due to a miscalculation they teleported their fleet directly into Urson space. Not willing to back down the Human Presidist declares war, and an epic space battle ensues in which the crew manages to commandeer one of the Alpha Busters. Aboard, they meet Feli, the ship's psychologist, who agrees to join the crew in exchange for not getting brutally murdered like everyone else. The crew sets a plan into motion to subtly alter the mindset of the Earthling humans into a more peaceful one, and inadvertently turn Earth into one massive, perpetual party. Shortly thereafter, Dubh meets the SECommissar, the head of SpaceSEC. He reveals that he was the one that hired the assassins in the Bloom, and that he is actually Dubh's father. And that... Dubh is his father. The SECommissar, who is in fact the Kih'tanni deity Our Lad Cheshire, explains that the universe is actually very young, and that Speed evidently created it somehow. Because the crew of the Ursa were central to the creation of the universe, they are in a sense its gods. When the universe was made, each crewmember had its own Echo, a deity that mirrored them and that possessed all of their godly powers. The elder gods harbor a deep hatred for the crew, and are working on penetrating their universe to destroy them and everything else. Dubh doesn't really give a shit and kills the SECommissar (and Thieresai) in a badass way. By killing his echo, Dubh gains his godly powers. The crew sets off to find and destroy their echoes, so that they might gain their powers and fight off the evil gods.
No one knows for sure what happens after that. The crew is never heard from again. We now join a new crew, led by the bastard son of Gary. The universe has become a much different place in the fifty years since the adventuring days of the crew of the Ursa Majoris. Skorokov has become extremely commonplace, and SpaceGOV has been replaced by the UUUS. Perhaps most importantly, sections of the universe have now become volatile areas where the laws of physics no longer apply. These areas are known as The Wrath, and are known to drive anyone stupid enough to go near them insane.
Rory's crew, who don't even have a ship, are hired to kill the ruler of a little shithole colony. They stealthily infiltrate the building and murder him, only to discover that he has anything but a human anatomy. During their escape they steal his briefcase, which directs them towards a beacon. Here they find a hideous red spikey ship that they use to escape. Once aboard, they learn that it's a prototype ship designed to allow travel through The Wrath. Unable to actually pay them for the job, the crew's client instead directs them towards a derelict space station, where there's sure to be some goods to be salvaged. Here they meet Terro Drake and fight a robot dog.
But fuck those guys let's get back to the old crew. In the city of Signet, both the After- and Beforelife, nine new souls awaken. They have no memories of who they are, and only after a great deal of thought can they piece together any semblence of an identity. Together they explore the city of Signet, and ultimately head off to meet three oracles, who they hope can help them learn about themselves. In doing so however, they anger the Cracked Lady, the queen of Signet, who sics Leonine soldiers on them. The party barely manages to escape with the Oracles, and using some trickery on their home, Loeli manages to mask it from the Cracked Lady. Unfortunately, the Oracles lose their abilities. The crew continues to explore Signet, doing what they can to avoid the Cracked Lady's forces, until Loeli decides to fly right into her fortress and offer to work for her. After a fight that destroys a huge swath of the city, the Cracked Lady summons the "Ten" to her, revealing that she is actually the soul of Thieresai, infused with a great deal of the SECommissar's power. After a bit of back-and-forth with Dubh, she offers the group a job as governers of the section of Signet that they just blew up. About half accept and half deny her, while Speed and Gary don't bother taking sides. Speed is too concerned about Ytlkrek to really give a shit about anything else, and Gary's just Gary.
That about catches us up! Gary is currently adventuring with his new scorpion pal named Boots, while Speed has just completed his journey to find Ytlkrek. The Outfit, the group that decided to work for Thieresai, are currently doing things to ingratiate themselves with the people of Signet, while The Coalition, the group that has decided to go against Thieresai, is trying to start a revolution against the Cracked Lady.
So! Now instead of fantasy we are in sci-fi. After saving the Starfish Colony from a Scat Adept, the crew of the Ursa Majoris takes off for a space rock where a high-profile ship-modder took residence. They find that the place has been ransacked by robots. One of the customers, a friend of a popular racer, managed to hide, so the crew does the sensible thing and takes him hostage, calling the racer for a ransom. The crew gets the shit kicked out of them by the racer's henchmen, and are saved when Speed challenges him to a race, which he wins. Because of this, Speed gains access to the biggest underground race there is, which is set to start in a week's time. Also, the good and bad members of the crew are beginning to notice that their moral choices are altering their appearances, and after some research learn that they are drawing cosmic forces, called Benevochlorians and Malevochondria, to themselves like magnets. Meanwhile, Gary passes out, and begins hallucinating an Urson woman who is urging him to track down an Urson pathway so that he can save the Urson race. They also discover Tomarli, a plant-like alien, drifting in an escape pod in space.
But that shit's boring! Speed enters into the race, where he meets Ytlkrek, a hot-headed (and hot) alien racer. While he's trying to hit on her, he's interrupted by the arrival of a massive warplate, controlled by a warlord AI called Dienderkahn. While Speed and Ytlkrek work together to smoke Dienderkahn on the track, the rest of the crew works to destroy his brain. Loeli transforms Dienderkahn into a timid, inquisitive AI named Oeliki, while Speed manages to edge past Ytlkrek to win the most difficult race in the Quadrant. Speed offers Ytlkrek a ride back to the warplate, and shortly after learns that apparently getting beaten finally got her hot for him and they have lots and lots of sexy (pretend) makeouts. Meanwhile, Gary acquires the Urson Pathway that was used in the race, and directs it to the coordinates that the Urson hallucination tells him.
The Pathway warps them to a distant galaxy, filled with a malicious dust that rends the warplate apart. Loeli just barely manages to download Oeliki into a robot before he's destroyed, and while Speed and Matt rush to save Ytlkrek the others fight back the dust to keep it from eating the Ursa Majoris. While the dust is temporarily kept at bay, the crew lands the ship at the Tehelikron, a planet-sized Urson space station. Inside, they find that the station has been maintained by a friendly group of aliens that were saved by the Urson long ago. They bring the crew to the central room, which is a massive cloning lab, which can be used to create a new generation of Urson. The Tehilikron uses the crew as a basis for the Urson, and unfortunately the evil members of the crew are the dominating factor, creating an army of Bear Nazis. An epic battle ensues, which results in the crew defeating the army. The Urson woman tells Gary that hidden somewhere in the universe there is something containing the data of the dead Urson race, which can be used to revive them properly. 4 clues as to its location where put on 4 different planets. The Tehilikron dissolves into dust, called Skorokov, and merges with the Ursa.
The first stop is an ocean planet, home to the ruins of an underwater Urson city. Speed and Ytlkrek scout ahead, and it suddenly appears that they've entered a protected and hidden Urson city. Speed takes his helmet off only to discover that he's actually still in the water, and narrowly survives drowning thanks to Ytlkrek. On the way back to the crew, Ytlkrek suddenly proposes to Speed, which he eagerly says yes to. Before they can tell the news to the rest of the crew, another Ytlkrek shows up, saying that Speed took his helmet off and died. She angrily calls the other Speed an illusion, and the two Ytlkreks get into a spat. The two are separated and watched closely as they explore the ruins, suddenly discovering the Psycho Whale, a monstrous beast that's been mutated by the Urson data. A fight ensues and the crew is victorious, flying off into space. Suddenly, Speed fuses with the core of the ship and immediately uses his powers to destroy the universe... again. The crew wakes up to find themselves prisoners of the Psycho Whale, who is currently feasting on Farth's brains. They manage to break free and defeat the whale, but soon discover that Speed actually did drown earlier, and that the one following them around was an illusion. Luckily Loeli is able to make a new one using the Tehilikron, and due to a bit of an accident he can now transform his racer into a suit of super-armor.
The next stop the crew makes is on Dubh's home planet of Kih'tan. The Kih'tanni people are locked in a constant struggle against SpaceSEC, the military force of SpaceGOV, the humano-centric governing body that controls the known galaxy. There they meet Thieresai, a genetically-modified military commander with a scar across most of her body and a lot of hate. The crew works their way to one of the last strongholds of the Kih'tanni, where they learn that their leader has taken the Skorokov they need into her body to become super-powered. She agrees to give it up if the crew helps her fight back SpaceSEC, a battle which ends in a climactic thrashing of Thieresai, who is arrested by SpaceSEC for warcrimes. The Kih'tanni leader keeps her word and gives the crew the Skorokov.
The next stop is a frozen world home to an ice elemental, a being of pure manceric energy that Matt hates for some reason. The crew destroys the creature and secures the Skorokov with little problem.
The final location the crew heads for is a human colony that's been mysteriously abandoned. The crew soon finds out why: Skorokov zombies have invaded the place. After lots of running, hiding, and shooting into vents, the crew manages to find the source of the Skorokov and merge it into what they need.
The four Skorokovs now united, the crew learns that the last leg of their quest to revive the Urson is the Dark, a large area of mysterious black space. Flying into it, the crew finds themselves in a surreal dreamworld, where their manceric powers are boosted exponentially. While exploring the mysterious place, called The Bloom, Speed goes a bit power crazy and almost kills himself when his manceric implant explodes. Fortunately he's able to create a prosthetic out of his racer. The crew continues onward into the Burning Tomorrow, where they're all separated and placed into personalized nightmares, each of which culminates in the meeting of an assassin hired by... someone. Each assassin is someone from the crew's past. Fortunately, Racer X, the assassin hired to kill Speed, is a double agent, and with his help Speed manages to rescue the others from the Burning Tomorrow. All the obstacles now overcome, the crew finds themselves at The Heart. They discover that this ancient piece of Urson technology is the source of all mancery in the universe, and that deactivating it to revive the Urson would destroy mancery, an act which would indirectly kill an untold number of people. On the other hand, The Bloom is slowly expanding outward, and will eventually consume the entirety of the universe. After a long debate, Gary deactivates the heart against the wishes of most of the crew. Matt immediately kills himself while the others stare on in silent horror. Considering that he has the only way out of the Heart, the rest of the crew resigns to continue being a part of Gary's crew, even though some of them harbor intense anger over what he did.
From here we cut to two months later. The Urson have become a massive force in Galactic affairs, their technology mostly making up for the loss of mancery. Humanity is somewhat frustrated with suddenly no longer being the dominant force, but there's little they can do about it. The crew flies off to Speed's home planet of Anyymaye as guests for his sister's wedding. After the wedding, the crew meets up with Dux, a massive bodyguard, and Foghorne, an alien from Toon Lunei that Speed is kind of racist against. They also meet with a newly resurrected Matt, who's under direct orders from Thieresai to watch Gary and keep him from stirring up any more shit. Here they find out that Speed's family is under pressure from a mob boss, and with little difficulty fuck him up bad. Speed learns that the loss of mancery has turned his idyllic world into one of depravity, and secretly plans with Matt to run away.
The crew happens upon a large, drifting ship with odd signals coming from it, and upon exploring it find it to be filled with pillow robots with powerful sleep-based weapons. While most of the crew clear out these robots, Speed, Matt and Ytlkrek steal the Ursa Majoris and fly away. They land on a small planet where they spend their funds on a new ship, and Speed and Matt almost immediately fall back into their old bickering ways as Matt tries to assume control of everything. Speed is approached by Thieresai, who is displeased with the performance of Matt and wants to hire Speed to watch Gary instead. Thinking of this as an opportunity to keep Gary from killing more people, Speed agrees. Matt gets stranded somewhere, alone and angry.
Now with multiple ships under their command, the crew splits up to investigate two separate areas. One half investigates the Tehilikron, which has apparently become haunted, while the other investigates a planet of hateful bug people that are oddly reminiscent of what the crew found in the burning tomorrow. What happens doesn't really matter, however, as the Tehilikron crew is suddenly met with a giant laser. The human military had been developing the Alpha Buster, the most powerful weapon in the universe, to try and trump the influence of the Urson, and due to a miscalculation they teleported their fleet directly into Urson space. Not willing to back down the Human Presidist declares war, and an epic space battle ensues in which the crew manages to commandeer one of the Alpha Busters. Aboard, they meet Feli, the ship's psychologist, who agrees to join the crew in exchange for not getting brutally murdered like everyone else. The crew sets a plan into motion to subtly alter the mindset of the Earthling humans into a more peaceful one, and inadvertently turn Earth into one massive, perpetual party. Shortly thereafter, Dubh meets the SECommissar, the head of SpaceSEC. He reveals that he was the one that hired the assassins in the Bloom, and that he is actually Dubh's father. And that... Dubh is his father. The SECommissar, who is in fact the Kih'tanni deity Our Lad Cheshire, explains that the universe is actually very young, and that Speed evidently created it somehow. Because the crew of the Ursa were central to the creation of the universe, they are in a sense its gods. When the universe was made, each crewmember had its own Echo, a deity that mirrored them and that possessed all of their godly powers. The elder gods harbor a deep hatred for the crew, and are working on penetrating their universe to destroy them and everything else. Dubh doesn't really give a shit and kills the SECommissar (and Thieresai) in a badass way. By killing his echo, Dubh gains his godly powers. The crew sets off to find and destroy their echoes, so that they might gain their powers and fight off the evil gods.
No one knows for sure what happens after that. The crew is never heard from again. We now join a new crew, led by the bastard son of Gary. The universe has become a much different place in the fifty years since the adventuring days of the crew of the Ursa Majoris. Skorokov has become extremely commonplace, and SpaceGOV has been replaced by the UUUS. Perhaps most importantly, sections of the universe have now become volatile areas where the laws of physics no longer apply. These areas are known as The Wrath, and are known to drive anyone stupid enough to go near them insane.
Rory's crew, who don't even have a ship, are hired to kill the ruler of a little shithole colony. They stealthily infiltrate the building and murder him, only to discover that he has anything but a human anatomy. During their escape they steal his briefcase, which directs them towards a beacon. Here they find a hideous red spikey ship that they use to escape. Once aboard, they learn that it's a prototype ship designed to allow travel through The Wrath. Unable to actually pay them for the job, the crew's client instead directs them towards a derelict space station, where there's sure to be some goods to be salvaged. Here they meet Terro Drake and fight a robot dog.
But fuck those guys let's get back to the old crew. In the city of Signet, both the After- and Beforelife, nine new souls awaken. They have no memories of who they are, and only after a great deal of thought can they piece together any semblence of an identity. Together they explore the city of Signet, and ultimately head off to meet three oracles, who they hope can help them learn about themselves. In doing so however, they anger the Cracked Lady, the queen of Signet, who sics Leonine soldiers on them. The party barely manages to escape with the Oracles, and using some trickery on their home, Loeli manages to mask it from the Cracked Lady. Unfortunately, the Oracles lose their abilities. The crew continues to explore Signet, doing what they can to avoid the Cracked Lady's forces, until Loeli decides to fly right into her fortress and offer to work for her. After a fight that destroys a huge swath of the city, the Cracked Lady summons the "Ten" to her, revealing that she is actually the soul of Thieresai, infused with a great deal of the SECommissar's power. After a bit of back-and-forth with Dubh, she offers the group a job as governers of the section of Signet that they just blew up. About half accept and half deny her, while Speed and Gary don't bother taking sides. Speed is too concerned about Ytlkrek to really give a shit about anything else, and Gary's just Gary.
That about catches us up! Gary is currently adventuring with his new scorpion pal named Boots, while Speed has just completed his journey to find Ytlkrek. The Outfit, the group that decided to work for Thieresai, are currently doing things to ingratiate themselves with the people of Signet, while The Coalition, the group that has decided to go against Thieresai, is trying to start a revolution against the Cracked Lady.
Last time on Glossolalia
Alright duders, so we got two games going at once. One's on pause though. Right now, we're playing DarkOrchid.
So the Ten (minus one) awaken the city of Signet, city of gods. The city is ruled by the Cracked Lady, the Fractured Queen, Queen of Queens, etc (why do people have so many different names in this game?). The Ten (minus one) quickly get on her bad side (though it's indicated they were never on her good side) by rescuing some seers she had chained by the eye sockets and at the same time cause an incident that everyone nearby does their very best to forget. They eventually figure out that the Cracked Lady can't see this one closet in their house, called Haven, so with some reality fuckery they put Haven inside the closet. Now they can travel anywhere in Signet from Haven via pathway, and get back via the Third. aka Loeli.
And Goddamn that probably makes zero sense but I'm going with it.
Also, everyone's kind of doing their own thing right now, with the ultimate objective of obtaining buildshards. I think.
The one on pause is Grey.
After being hired to kill a prominent member of the local UUUS government, our team of rag-tag mercenaries met up with a few old friends and began planning the job. The kill went off about as smoothly as one could hope, and led to the crew finding themselves in possession of a prototype "Wrathship," a space ship capable of using the Wrath to travel almost instantaneously across space. In spite of Brickley's misgivings, the crew held onto the ship and after arguing for like three fucking pages about what to name it wne off to a derelict space station located right on the border of a mass of Wrath. While Brickley waited aboard the ship the others looted the station. They found the entire crew of the facility brutally murdered, and before long Preston mysteriously vanished. Meanwhile, Locot and Rory discovered the dormant Terro Drake. He and the crew are now continuing their search through the station while Brickley does a bunch of inane bullshit on the ship. And then some of them killed a robot dog, so they're probably about to leave.
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Locth gets a Divinity Points.
Speed jams his heels into the ground to stop his backwards momentum, then bursts off towards the Leonine, ramming him with his shoulder.
I'll spend 1 divinity.
http://www.audioentropy.com/
and damn it sorry speed
Yeah, you better be sorry.
http://www.audioentropy.com/
The Third begins a hacking attempt, trying to pry open a crack for the pathway to slip through and stay open long enough for Gary and her to get through.
Three divinity points on that.
"SHUT THE FUCK UP"
Shifting all of his Smoke plates to his feet, Tommy rockets toward the Leonine. White hot ash falls off his body as he continues his flight path, and tackling the Leonine, Tommy grabs the creature by his collar and pulls him in, putting the two face to face as Tommy continues to rocket into the sky.
"Do you know Who I am?", He whispers through grinding teeth "Do you know what I've Seen!"
"Through drugs, I've glimpsed into planes a creature such as you could only imagine. How fucking dare you attack me or my friends"
"But, I take pity upon you. Surely it isn't your fault? You didn't know!"
"Well, know you're gonna know. Trust me on that!!!"
Tightening his grip, Tommy eyes flare a deep green as he stares into the Leonine's very mind, attempting to put him into the most altered of state ever experienced by any living thing.
Tommy then releases his grip, letting the creature fall to the ground like a comet.
"Tell the Cracked Whore that she's next. That is, if you retain the ability to form sentences"
Spending two divinity points
Locth uses his telekinesis to unsteadily raise himself up of the ground and set him on his feet.
He takes a step toward the creature, and another, and another. The sound of his footsteps echo strangely, as if the sound was bouncing off structures that were there and yet, at the same time, not there at all.
The veil of space and time, the fabric of reality, is being forced back. The buildings jump at the feline, the streets twist up and around, the sky seems to melt, and the rain begins to pelt the creature from below. Voices from a world beyond this godly plane whisper and scream in its ears, rants of tears and madness, mutterings of despair and loss.
And all the while, the One Between, the Half-Dead, approaches. Blinking in and out of sight, sometimes here, sometimes there, but always advancing.
Until finally, he tries to force the veil over the feline.
i'm gonna do my best to press this grasp to its limits
edit: oh yeah, almost forgot. three divinity points
all flaying minds and what not
Jo'marli snaps his fingers. Thousands of tiny blades sharpen. He walks casually toward the Leonine, as his green army takes aim. The a brief smile, before the eighth fires a barrage of razor sharp grass at this guy.
He opens his eyes. He is ready to perform his duty, let combat commence.
He charges at the Leonine with thunder in his eyes, fury in his heart, then, when he is near enough, he jumps on top of the Leonine's head, then somersaults over him. At the apex of his somersault, as he looks down upon the Leonine, time seems to slow down as he slashes at the great beast's back, his forearms now blades.
He lands with his back towards the beast. He spins around to face the beast once again, and at the end of this spin he calls forth all his strength for one mighty swing, as he intertwines his forearms to create one mighty blade. He let's out a great roar as his blade makes contact with the beast's skin.
He shall show the Queen of Queens the face of war, as he lays waste to all she sends to lay waste to them.
First attempt at a complex attack better make it a good one. I'm Sacrificing two Divinity points.
http://deicidecomic.tumblr.com/
READ MY COMIC ^^
And then I spot a typo in my last action. BAH
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Also The Doctor looks over at Speed still scuffling with the Leonine and decides he can handle it. He turns, and his coat sluggishly follows his movements as he makes his way towards the houses. All the while his eyes scan the general ground in the hopes of locating a buildshard, or perhaps a map of this place.
What spring does with the cherry trees.
Spoiler: Sink Team is probably gonna kill that Hunter Leonine right of the bat, due to being entirely awesome.
100% Awesome
Description: You guys fucking rock, all the time
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
Time seems to freeze for a moment after The Five of Ten's assault, everything, save the constant pouring rain, held perfectly still in a single, eternal moment.
The Hunter Leonine shudders once, and falls to the ground in pieces.
You Never Roll 1s.
[Lwerden's Climb - Spiraling Ascent Into Cloud]
[18 vs. 2] [-1 ???] [Mountain Leonine Has Been Defeated] The Swift One slams into the Leonine with deadly force, sending the massive creature flying directly into its already-defeated partner, and causing another great explosion of rocks, dust, and bloodstuff.
Two small, glowing orbs roll out of the Leonine's bodies.
As the Doctor scans the surrounding terrain, his eyes lock on a small obelisk at the center of the walkway, a few dozen feet in from the gate. A progress bar appears in his field of view and quickly fills.
Lwerden's Climb added to your Map.
[Haven]
[85] The Third's eyes close, and Haven dims around her, the pathway itself drawing in all of the building's power, its silver surface glowing with the radiance of a small sun. Twisting, unimaginable patterns of thought and power twist through The Third's mind. She reaches out and takes hold of the Program, twisting it, bending it to her will. She can see The Cracked Lady's fracture wall within the maddened fractal perfection of the Program, she can see its harsh, broken edges, the glint of light from its glassy surfaces. The Third reaches out and slams through the mirror-like ward, breaks it apart at its base, sending its pieces, its logics scattering to the seven winds.
[Sink]
A small orb of light rolls out of the Leonine's body. Meanwhile, the fractured space blocking the exit to the Wicked Way crumples and falls in upon itself, the sky returns to its usual slate gray, and the shrieking stops.
Say, DE?AD, have you seen Edcrab's Exigency stuff? It's really neat.
Fuck yes dead
Does this mean that the two divinity points I said I was gonna use were spent?
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You guys "burned" the Divinity to pay for the Achievement.
You all gain two divinity, though.
Oh, and
Dubh, like a pool of mercury, slides deeper into the sink- nothing more than a creep of shard edges and soft shadow.
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Twitter (mean leftist discourse)
Twitch (I stream most days of the week)
Twitter (mean leftist discourse)
"We fucking rocked"
Dubh wanders down the rain-slicked roads of Sink, the shards of his skin graying now to match the monotone dull of the soggy city around him. He can hear the hiss of the wind over the constant drone of the rain, and as the breeze washes through him he can feel a little of his passion subsiding, swept away on the damp.
Creatures linger under the awnings all around him, but, as he moves deeper into Sink, he finds more and more of them sitting in the street itself - some sitting, some lying down, all of them apparently entirely unconcerned with the pouring rain, their faces expressionless, blank.
"...love myself, better than you, da de da dooo"
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"What exactly are we here looking for anyway Doctor?"
http://www.audioentropy.com/
Buildshard: Gray Cavern added to Speed's Inventory.
[Sink]
Looking out over the city from atop one of the sagging towers of Sink, Dubh gazes out over the drenched borough. From this height, the place is a patchwork of dark gray wood and darker, glistening streets of cobblestone. He can see several squares littered throughout the area, no more than shallow bulges in the roads really, each with an ornamental fountain, each now overflowing.
He can also see now that the water-logged warren slopes to the west, the rainwater pooling in those sunken places, the buildings slowly descending into the liquid, until only their tattered wooden roofs remained.
"This ain't the boyscouts, fucknut, you don't get a goddamned reward just 'cause you didn't fuck up quite as much as you could have." Tommy flies up into the storm, his wings flapping hard against the downpour. As he gets higher and higher, however, he finds that the rain becomes harder, stronger, faster. It beats down on him like hail, each raindrop becoming a watery bullet slamming into his emerald skin, sending tiny cracks racing out across his shards. [30] He continues to push forward, toward the clouds, but only gets about three hundred feet up before the strain is too much, and he comes crashing down onto the streets below.