I pull up to the gym and right at the front was a suped up Honda Civic diagonally parked across two spots
Just
Right by the door
"Okay," I think to myself "Look for the biggest douche in the gym. That is who owns this car."
I know. Finding the biggest douche at the gym is like trying to find the worlds tallest midget.
But I found him.
Boy did I find him.
I walk into the gym and there is this guy doing reps with some free weights while wearing what seems to be a polo shirt he had purchased at the baby gap.
This has to be the worlds smallest shirt.
Collar popped.
I take it in briefly and go about my workout.
Later, I walk by him.
He is standing in front of the mirror
And begins to flex.
Hard.
"Oh man, his shirt can't take this!" I think.
Mathematically there was just not enough shirt where there needed to be.
I was right.
I noticed all sorts of tears all around his biceps, with new ones appearing as he is flexing.
He is not reacting to these tears.
In fact he seems to be proud of them.
It as this point I notice that he is not actually looking at himself.
He is looking straight at the girl that is to his right, through the mirror, as she is using some free weights.
Oh no.
He wants her to see this.
That is when I realize that I am watching his move.
Now, not every guy has a move. In fact, I don't know of a single guy that does.
This is the shit that only exists in sitcoms.
But nope.
There is this giant muscle of a man.
Flexing off his shirt like the Incredible Hulk.
Trying to impress a chick.
She pretended not to notice him and it was at this point I came to the realization that it was me and only me that was staring at him.
And now he was staring back.
My mind started to race.
Oh god, say something. Say anything.
"Sweet shirt."
Spin on heal.
Power walk away.
Tasteticle on
Uh-oh I accidentally deleted my signature. Uh-oh!!
My favourite part of the whole thing, I think, is that when I spun around to leave, my shoe made an incredibly audible screech - like when you slide your sneaker on the gym floor.
I feel it added to the awkwardness.
My shoes have excellent comedic timing.
Tasteticle on
Uh-oh I accidentally deleted my signature. Uh-oh!!
Posts
LOOK
AT IT
WITH YOUR EYES
I'm bleeding from all of my face
AMP'd is bleeding on me with his face it is so gross
that is incredible
i didn't know the gimp from 300 was from Seattle
you secretly like it
Today at the gym I had witnessed The Bromega Man:
I pull up to the gym and right at the front was a suped up Honda Civic diagonally parked across two spots
Just
Right by the door
"Okay," I think to myself "Look for the biggest douche in the gym. That is who owns this car."
I know. Finding the biggest douche at the gym is like trying to find the worlds tallest midget.
But I found him.
Boy did I find him.
I walk into the gym and there is this guy doing reps with some free weights while wearing what seems to be a polo shirt he had purchased at the baby gap.
This has to be the worlds smallest shirt.
Collar popped.
I take it in briefly and go about my workout.
Later, I walk by him.
He is standing in front of the mirror
And begins to flex.
Hard.
"Oh man, his shirt can't take this!" I think.
Mathematically there was just not enough shirt where there needed to be.
I was right.
I noticed all sorts of tears all around his biceps, with new ones appearing as he is flexing.
He is not reacting to these tears.
In fact he seems to be proud of them.
It as this point I notice that he is not actually looking at himself.
He is looking straight at the girl that is to his right, through the mirror, as she is using some free weights.
Oh no.
He wants her to see this.
That is when I realize that I am watching his move.
Now, not every guy has a move. In fact, I don't know of a single guy that does.
This is the shit that only exists in sitcoms.
But nope.
There is this giant muscle of a man.
Flexing off his shirt like the Incredible Hulk.
Trying to impress a chick.
She pretended not to notice him and it was at this point I came to the realization that it was me and only me that was staring at him.
And now he was staring back.
My mind started to race.
Oh god, say something. Say anything.
"Sweet shirt."
Spin on heal.
Power walk away.
Uh-oh I accidentally deleted my signature. Uh-oh!!
one question
what colour was the shirt
Uh-oh I accidentally deleted my signature. Uh-oh!!
Uh-oh I accidentally deleted my signature. Uh-oh!!
A guy who tells stories that end in other people being awful and him being excellent.
with manly chest hair
man
What's the problem, kiddo?
I feel it added to the awkwardness.
My shoes have excellent comedic timing.
Uh-oh I accidentally deleted my signature. Uh-oh!!
stressed for various reasons
feel lonely
so, the usual
i have a cold
I AM SNEEZING
Today was pretty good.
Uh-oh I accidentally deleted my signature. Uh-oh!!
forget all of these problems
I've got the rap patrol on the gat patrol
Satans..... hints.....
i felt nice all day despite having no reason to
I have a sinus infection.
MY SNEEZE-RELATED ILLNESS IS SUPERIOR TO YOUR SNEEZE RELATED ILLNESS
SteamID: Baroque And Roll
you should fix this!
but you are a nothing person who does not matter
ADDRESS MY SNEEZING PEASANTS
JEEZ
again
woooo