The relationship was not defined, and it's normal for people to not be exclusive until they decide to be (i.e. talk about it like you both did). You weren't exclusive, now you are. That's it. This thing just happened to happen close to the end of non-exclusivity, but I would say there is no gray area here. There is a clear line.
Furthermore, what you did before that line is none of her business. You past is in the past and so is hers, what is important now is what you do from this point on...and it sounds like you want to do good!
The only thing I would say is now that you are exclusive, get both yourselves tested for STDs, so you can start with a clean slate (and conscience!).
Dont tell her. If you werent together, theres no expectation.
Im literally in the exact same position as you (other than the travelling thing). I dont feel compelled to tell her about all the girls ive slept with since i met her. Why would i? I wouldnt expect her to tell me about any guys she may have slept with in that same time. We werent together.
Zeon on
Check out my band, click the banner.
0
Options
Deebaseron my way to work in a suit and a tieAhhhh...come on fucking guyRegistered Userregular
edited December 2010
+1
1. You aren't an asshole
2. Don't tell her.
Deebaser on
0
Options
ceresWhen the last moon is cast over the last star of morningAnd the future has past without even a last desperate warningRegistered User, Moderatormod
edited December 2010
It wasn't cheating because you weren't in a relationship. Cheating requires terms on which to cheat.
Don't tell her. Not because you should feel bad or hide it from her, or because she'll be mad, but because it's not a big deal and no one cares.
ceres on
And it seems like all is dying, and would leave the world to mourn
mrt144King of the NumbernamesRegistered Userregular
edited December 2010
I'll tell you one thing; Stop dipping your quill in company ink.
(Althought I met my soon to be wife at work)
mrt144 on
0
Options
MrMonroepassed outon the floor nowRegistered Userregular
edited December 2010
Keep your mouth shut, you haven't done anything particularly terrible, and get over yourself. You're human just like the rest of us and chances are you'll end up getting drunk someday and making a mistake. If that does happen, it won't be because you're a cheater, it will be because you're human and humans do fucked up things all the time. So try to keep this in perspective and don't bother telling anyone about it.
Posts
Don't sweat it, and don't tell her.
The relationship was not defined, and it's normal for people to not be exclusive until they decide to be (i.e. talk about it like you both did). You weren't exclusive, now you are. That's it. This thing just happened to happen close to the end of non-exclusivity, but I would say there is no gray area here. There is a clear line.
Furthermore, what you did before that line is none of her business. You past is in the past and so is hers, what is important now is what you do from this point on...and it sounds like you want to do good!
The only thing I would say is now that you are exclusive, get both yourselves tested for STDs, so you can start with a clean slate (and conscience!).
Im literally in the exact same position as you (other than the travelling thing). I dont feel compelled to tell her about all the girls ive slept with since i met her. Why would i? I wouldnt expect her to tell me about any guys she may have slept with in that same time. We werent together.
Check out my band, click the banner.
1. You aren't an asshole
2. Don't tell her.
Don't tell her. Not because you should feel bad or hide it from her, or because she'll be mad, but because it's not a big deal and no one cares.
(Althought I met my soon to be wife at work)