"Ah, Shadow Demon," said Venger as he sat upon his throne, "I have a task for you to help rid me of those meddling Companions and provide me with ultimate rule over The Realm of Dungeons & Dragons!"
"Yes, master... what could it be?" questioned Shadow Demon.
Venger's eyes glowed red, "You are from the dimension of shadows. I want you to take us all there where we will meet in final battle."
"Ahh, the Shadowlands? Your wish is my command, master. Ahhh hahahahahahah!"
Venger cocked an eyebrow. "What is he so amused about?" he wondered, dismissed it as he left to alert his assassin, Dekion.
- - - -
Back in The Realm of Dungeons & Dragons, Presto was looking for his glasses (again) and just tripped over Dungeon Master, who appeared from behind a rock. "Dammit, you gnome, what the hell, man!"
"Lower your tone, Presto." scolded Hank, the natural born leader of men and women-folk, "have some respect for the Dungeon Master."
"Yes, it seems some evil is afoot." announced Dungeon Master to the group of Companions. "In order to send you home, you must defeat Venger and Tiamat and rid the world of all evil."
"That's a TALL order, SMALL fry," quipped Eric. Everyone stared at him.
"And we're SHORT on resources," added Diana. Everyone laughed at her funny pun. Except Eric, who grumbled.
"Meh!" cried Uni.
"So, the plan of action is to..." Dungeon Master was interrupted as Shadow Demon and a horde of Shades clouded the sky.
Bobby's club glowed bright as he hefted it at the sky, "We're under attack! I'll totally smash the ground to take care of that flying pest and his jerks!"
"Bobby, no!" cried Sheila as she held him back.
"Looks like we're being taken to the Shadowlands, a place of true neutrality, where everyone looks the same!" mused Dungeon Master. "We'll likely be shrouded in shadows and unable to communicate properly. Unfortunately, this battle will not be fair, but I know just what to do to even the odds."
- - - -
Elsewhere in the Realm, Tiamat was suddenly very pissed off.
- - - -
The Companions were swallowed whole as Shadow Demon and the Shades descended upon them. They found themselves in a gray world, shrouded in impenetrable mists so that no one could identify the other. In addition, they counted twelve individual shrouds. A quintuple-voiced scream could be heard from one shroud, and this did not amuse Venger in the least. "What comedy is this, Shadow Demon? I hear Tiamat among them!"
"'twas not I who brought her here, master. It seems Dungeon Master's magicks have wrought a spell of obfuscation. My Shades cannot banish everyone and have decided to listen to the group as a whole to hear their decision of whom to banish. Those who do not participate are they, themselves, banished."
Dekion was slightly amused to see Venger's plan backfire. "At least we know who each other is; let's get this over with."
- - - -
The Companions oveheard Venger and his minions, but could not quite pinpoint a location. Hank drew his magic bow, but not even it's light could penetrate the fog, making him as indistinguishable from the other eleven shrouds. A frightened whinny of "Meh-eheheheh!" sounded from... somewhere.
"I've got Bobby and Uni," cried Shiela.
"Good, stay where you are and we'll find you," hollered Diana.
"Well," thought Eric, "since we're probably not going to get out of this one and I don't want to die a virgin, I'll try and get me some brown sugar." He reached out to a shroud and felt for Diana's shapely curves.
"Who's grabbing my ass?" cried Presto.
Embarrassed, Eric quickly backed off and subsequently lost the Presto-shroud to the mist.
=================================================
You are Hank, the Ranger.
You're the oldest Companion and a natural leader, also the most level-headed, and your orders are (with the usual exception of Eric) not questioned. Unfortunately, neither Sheila or Diana put out, which is very frustrating. You want to get the Companions home so you can find some slutty carnival girls.
PRIMARY ABILITY
You carry a Dungeon Master Artifact - The Magic Bow of Power
* Power allows you to, once a round, target someone for a Private Kill.
* PM the Gamemaster with your target before the round ends.
* The Private Kill *can* (accidentally) kill Dungeon Master, but cannot kill Venger or Tiamat.
* Your identity will not be revealed on use.
WIN CONDITION: If Shadow Demon, Venger, and Tiamat are killed and Dekion is killed or converted, you win.
=================================================
You are Bobby, the Barbarian.
You are the youngest Companion and are dressed in fur pants and boots, a horned helmet, and a cross-belt harness. You wield a magic club so powerful that it can produce shockwaves when you strike the ground. You are also Sheila's younger brother and have a pet baby unicorn, Uni. And a mullet. Totally gay. Might as well shoot rainbows out of your club.
PRIMARY ABILITY
You wield a Dungeon Master Artifact - The Magic Club of Distraction
* Distraction allows you to, once a round, target someone to negate their PRIMARY ABILITY for this round.
* PM the Gamemaster with your target before the round ends.
* You cannot use this ability 2 rounds in a row.
* Your identity will not be revealed on use.
SECONDARY ABILITY
You know the identities of Uni and Sheila.
WIN CONDITION: If Shadow Demon, Venger, and Tiamat are killed and Dekion is killed or converted, you win.
=================================================
You are Presto, the Magician.
As the magician, you have a magical hat of complete crap that never works anyway, so you might as well forget it. And you lose your glasses a lot. Good job there, Velma.
PRIMARY ABILITY
You wear a Dungeon Master Artifact - the Magical Hat of... Magic.
* Magic allows you to, once a round, peer through a target shroud to reveal an identity.
* PM the Gamemaster with your target before the round ends.
* Your identity will not be revealed on use.
* Shadow Demon will look like whomever he has shapechanged into.
WIN CONDITION: If Shadow Demon, Venger, and Tiamat are killed and Dekion is killed or converted, you win.
=================================================
You are Sheila, the Thief.
As the thief Companion, you have a magical cloak of invisibility. You are Bobby's older sister and therefore very protective of him. You are the token hot cartoon redhead, like Daphne, but secretly a lesbian. You are daring enough to trick enemies and have driven a band of Venger's lizard men and bullywugs against each other.
PRIMARY ABILITY
You wear a Dungeon Master Artifact - The Magic Cloak of Invisibility.
* Once a round, you may defend a target and redirect all attacks against him to a second target.
* PM the Gamemaster with your guard target and redirect target before the round ends.
* You cannot redirect the Shade Vote.
* You cannot use this ability 2 rounds in a row.
* Your identity will not be revealed on use.
SECONDARY ABILITY
You know the identities of Uni and Bobby.
WIN CONDITION: If Shadow Demon, Venger, and Tiamat are killed and Dekion is killed or converted, you win.
=================================================
You are Eric, the Cavalier.
Companion-Shmanion, do you know the real reason why you're here? To show kids that it's better to go along with the group than to be a dissenting individual. Great lesson, parents groups and TV consultants. Idiots. You've decided long ago that you're on your own. Look out for Numero Uno. So, you've been given a Dungeon Master Artifact; a magic shield. Whoop-ti-freaking-do. At least it'll let you get through this thing alive somehow, even if you have to give up your allies. You don't care about getting home, you just want to live till tomorrow.
PRIMARY ABILITY
You carry a Dungeon Master Artifact - the Magic Shield of Defense.
* Once a round, you may either guard yourself or another from a single attack.
* PM the Gamemaster with your guard target before the round ends.
* You cannot guard against the Shade Vote.
* You cannot guard against Tiamat.
* Your identity will not be revealed on use.
SECONDARY ABILITY
You have an optional, alternate win condition and it is your choice whether you use it.
WIN CONDITION: If Shadow Demon, Venger, and Tiamat are killed and Dekion is killed or converted, you win.
OPTIONAL WIN CONDITION: If Dungeon Master, all Companions, and Tiamat are dead, you win.
=================================================
You are Diana the Acrobat.
You are an olympic-level athlete, and Dungeon Master gave you a stick. That little white BASTARD. You're obviously the token black character, and he gives you a stick? You might as well be Rodney mutha-fukkin' King. And he calls you a "Companion?" What he hell is that shit? You ain't no one's bitch companion. As an aggressive, young black woman, you tend to take over for leader when Hank "The Man" Ranger isn't around. Your magical telescoping javelin can be used for vaulting, spanning gaps, looking like Donatello, ahh whatever. This sucks.
PRIMARY ABILITY
You carry a Dungeon Master Artifact - the Magical Javelin of Courage, because you gotta have courge if all you've got is a goddamn stick.
* Courage gives you 3 Secret Votes each round that you can apply any way you choose.
* PM the Gamemaster before the round is over with the recipient(s) of your 3 Secret Votes.
SECONDARY ABILITY
Your exotic hotness is precisely what a Celestial Knight needs; and skeletal warrior Dekion is just your kind of man.
* Instead of using your PRIMARY ABILITY, you may attempt to "convert Dekion" so his win condition becomes yours.
* PM the Gamemaster before the round is over with whomever you target for conversion.
* Your identity will be revealed to the target, but their identity and the conversion results will not be revealed to you.
* A successful conversion of Dekion will cancel his PRIMARY ABILITY use for that round.
WIN CONDITION: If Shadow Demon, Venger, and Tiamat are killed and Dekion is killed or converted, you win.
=================================================
You are Uni, the aptly-named baby Unicorn.
As Bobby's pet baby unicorn, you are cute and mostly helpless, but you have a limited teleportation ability. And you're a freaking baby unicorn. Watch out for Ash Ketcham.
PRIMARY ABILITY
Unicorns teleport, even baby ones.
* Once a round, you may teleport a target or yourself away from any attack, *including* a Shade Abduction (due to Vote conditions).
* PM the Gamemaster before the round is over with whomever you target for teleportation.
* You must wait 2 rounds before using this ability again (usable every third round).
* Your identity will not be revealed on use.
SECONDARY ABILITY
You know the identities of Bobby and Sheila.
WIN CONDITION: If Shadow Demon, Venger, and Tiamat are killed and Dekion is killed or converted, you win.
=================================================
You are Dungeon Master, our Guide to the Realm of Dungeons & Dragons.
You supplied the Companions with the Dungeon Master Arifacts and clues for their numerous opportunities to return home. Plus you dragged Tiamat into this conflict to help take down Venger once and for all. You promise to send the Companions home once all evil is destroyed (or converted). Your powers are greatly reduced in the Shadowlands.
PRIMARY ABILITY
You can peer through the shrouds once a round to reveal an identity.
* If you discover an evil character (Tiamat, Dekion, Venger, Shadow Demon), they will be told your identity.
* PM the Gamemaster before the round is over with your target.
SECONDARY ABILITIES
Instead of Seering, you can attempt to Private Kill Tiamat.
* If you accidentally target a Companion, he or she will be killed and you will commit suicide from despair.
* If you accidentally target Shadow Demon or Venger or Dekion, your attack will be deflected and you will be killed.
You can only be killed by an Artifact-empowered Venger, Hank's Bow, your own Seer screw-up, or the Vote.
WIN CONDITION: If Shadow Demon, Venger, and Tiamat are killed and Dekion is killed or converted, you win.
=============================================
You are Venger, the Evil Wizard Lord.
You seek to rule the land and to do so, you must rid the world of the Dungeon Master by using the Companion's magical weapons to bolster your power. You have one horn, powerful magic, and powerful minions. Mwah ha ha ha ha ha!
PRIMARY ABILITIES
For each Dungeon Master Artifact you acquire, you can use it's ability one time.
* Dungeon Master Artifacts are acquired when a the Shadow Vote or you or a minion (Dekion, Shadow Demon) kills a Companion.
* You may use only one Artifact at a time.
* If you acquire it, you may use Hank's Bow against Dungeon Master.
* PM the Gamemaster before the round is over with your decision.
If you acquire 3 Artifacts, instead of using an Artifact, you can target a single Private Kill at either Dungeon Master or Tiamat.
If you acquire 4 Artifacts, you can target a second Private Kill.
If you acquire 5 Artifacts, you can target a third Private Kill.
If you acquire 6 Artifacts, you can target a fourth Private Kill.
* Used Artifacts qualify in the total.
* If an Unused Artifact was used for a Private Kill, it can still maintains it's single use.
* PM the Gamemaster before the round is over with your target decision.
* You must know the target is Dungeon Master or Tiamat or you will waste the Private Kill.
* Your identity will not be revealed on use.
SECONDARY ABILITIES
You can only be killed by Vote or Tiamat's Private Kill.
You know the identities of Dekion and Shadow Demon.
WIN CONDITION: If Dungeon Master and Tiamat are dead, you win.
=============================================
You are Shadow Demon, Venger's Lackey.
You are a shapeshifter and though we are all in your home dimension, Dungeon Master's spell of confusion has neutered your command of this world.
PRIMARY ABILITY
As a shape-shifter, once per round, you may acquire the identity and Primary Ability of any target, dead or alive, friend or foe.
* You will be told the target's identity.
* You will always seer as whomever you are shape-shifted to be.
* You can only acquire an individual identity once.
* You can only acquire Venger if he is dead.
* You may both use an acquired Primary Ability then shape-shift, in that order.
* You do not have to shape-shift every round, but you can only shape-shift once per round.
* Your true form will be revealed upon your death.
* Bobby's Primary Ability used against you will revert you to your true form.
* PM the Gamemaster before the round is over with your decision.
SECONDARY ABILITY
You know the identities of Venger and Dekion.
WIN CONDITION: If Dungeon Master and Tiamat are dead, you win.
=============================================
You are Dekion, Venger's Skeletal Assassin Slave.
Once a Celestial Knight, you were corrupted by Venger's evil magics and are now his enslaved minion.
PRIMARY ABILITY
You carry a Magic Sword; it is not a Dungeon Master Artifact.
* The Magic Sword allows you to, once a round, target someone for a Private Kill.
* PM the Gamemaster with your target before the round ends.
* The Private Kill cannot kill Venger, Tiamat, or Dungeon Master.
* Your identity will not be revealed on use.
SECONDARY ABILITY
You know the identities of Venger and Shadow Demon.
WIN CONDITION: If Dungeon Master and Tiamat are dead, you win.
OPTIONAL WIN CONDITION: If you are converted and Shadow Demon, Venger, and Tiamat are killed, you win.
=============================================
You are Tiamat, the Multi-Headed Dragon.
A fearsome dragon with a screeching voice and five heads, you promote ultimate chaos. Your heads breathe fire, ice, bolts of lightning, acid, and streams of poisonous gas. You are quite pissed at having been taken from The Realm as you were right in the middle of a seven-way with 2 wyverns, a fire drake, a platinum dragon, and a sacrificial virgin princess.
PRIMARY ABILITY:
You may make one Private Kill a round.
* PM the Gamemaster with your target before the round ends.
SECONDARY ABILITY
You can only be killed by Vote or Dungeon Master's Private Kill.
WIN CONDITION: If you are the only survivor, you win.
- "Uni", survivor.
- "Sheila", survivor.
Posts
Why the hell not.
Mini phallas are so damn fun.
*disappears in a poof of ninja dust*
Yeah, so are you signing up or are you not b/c that's just ultimately vague.
Essentially, I'm blackballing the guy. Too many no-shows.
Oh boy, I'd better stop joking around if I want to make it.
As do we all...
!in
Planeswalker
Will of the Council - Starting with you, each player votes for death goblin.
Ha! I hope it's a 'Who's the Ardor'-phalla. That'd be really odam appropriate. But then if you were an Ardor you'd have to make a deal with the good guys or something...
Planeswalker
Will of the Council - Starting with you, each player votes for death goblin.
Actually, there's a bit of backstabbing involved as a particular GOOD guy can have a bad guy win condition by joining with them and a BAD guy can have a good guy win condition by being converted to them.
Plus there's a NEUTRAL who wants everyone dead!
Have...have I become a running gag now? Nobody will ever take me seriously again! *cries*
So I could sign up, watch Squashua give me the 'Ardor' role and watch everyone just obliterate me because it's fun? That sounds like it's not very good for my self-esteem.
And no worries, Ardor, we take you seriously. Or do worry. That's okay too.
Nah, I promise I won't ever just "assign" a role. Random numbers all the way.
As the best Phalla player EVER, I will totally dominate this game.
When ZoidPhalla concludes, I will start this. It will go from NOON EST to NOON EST.
Noon.
I can start whenever y'all want me to, but out of respect for RH and to minimize confusion, I'm waiting till the end of Zoidberg Phalla.
Planeswalker
Will of the Council - Starting with you, each player votes for death goblin.
You are too nice.
WHAT TIME would you like me to narrate at? I am unavailable between 5-7 Eastern and would prefer to do it earlier rather than later.
I'm EAST COAST in the hizzle.
By the way, Ardor (the puss that he is) has stepped down to Alternate so that Gleve can take his place.
MOVED RULES TO OP.
- Companions and DM must kill Shadow Demon, Venger, and Tiamat, and kill or convert Dekion
- Venger and Shadow Demon must kill Dungeon Master and Tiamat
- Dekion wins with Companions if converted and with Venger otherwise
- Tiamat must kill everyone
- Companion Eric has the alternate win condition of killing the Companions and DM
Is that right?Questions: