So this week our 13.5 month old daughter started doing something new. She still occasionally wakes up to nurse in the middle of the night, NBD, has always been an angel about going back to sleep when done. Occasionally she'd stand up to try to yell at me, but I'd just lay her down, she'd cry a bit, and then go to sleep. Sunday night she turned into a heaving, howling mess and nothing short of me getting up with her for two hours until she was worn out and passed out on me sufficed.
We repeated this Monday night. We repeated this TWICE on Tuesday night. Last night she started up when we were putting her down first thing for the night, which is unheard of. She's been going to bed well for months and months now. So my wife and I ended up sitting at the dining room table, listening to her yell and scream and cry, feeling just AWFUL, but with the knowledge that going in there is the one thing we can't do, because it's why she's behaving this way. She lasted twenty minutes before she passed out, and then she slept a straight 10.5 through the night.
My best guess is she's been getting more willful of late, throwing the odd temper tantrum when she doesn't get something she wants, so she started applying it to sleeping and/or being away from us at night. Only problem is unlike a daytime temper tantrum, you can't redirect them at night, because that's exactly what they want.
It straight up sucks. She's always been a kid where intervening always meant continuing the process, and leaving her be was the fastest way for her to go to sleep. I'm hoping that she learns quickly that this isn't going to work. I don't want to do many more nights like this.
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KakodaimonosCode fondlerHelping the 1% get richerRegistered Userregular
Naw, I wish, it'd make more sense. She's slower on the teeth, she's just getting in number 5 now. Doesn't seem to be giving her any trouble, there's no issues napping, no general clingyness, etc.
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KakodaimonosCode fondlerHelping the 1% get richerRegistered Userregular
Hmm. When James has had really bad nights like that it's been: teething, he ate something he's slightly allergic to (sweet potatoes) or he's got a cold.
My little girl only feels comfortable sleeping on her side and occasionally her back. I've watched her enough now to know that she never rolled onto her face so I'm not quite as worried as I was when she was born. And boy, does she hate having her arms swaddled.
Well I'm super happy to report that my niece's sixteenth birthday party was a complete success. Both her parents came and everyone got along perfectly. We played cooking themed games as she wants to go to culinary school and she got a new cell phone from another uncle and driver's Ed from her dad. We had about 40 people in all and the results were multiple tears on her part. She was completely surprised and overwhelmed which was a really nice feeling.
We also had a really fun sleepover the night before where she had a friend come with her to our house and Chinese food was eaten and Ticket to Ride was played too.
Well I'm super happy to report that my niece's sixteenth birthday party was a complete success. Both her parents came and everyone got along perfectly. We played cooking themed games as she wants to go to culinary school and she got a new cell phone from another uncle and driver's Ed from her dad. We had about 40 people in all and the results were multiple tears on her part. She was completely surprised and overwhelmed which was a really nice feeling.
We also had a really fun sleepover the night before where she had a friend come with her to our house and Chinese food was eaten and Ticket to Ride was played too.
Now we're all half dead recovering today
She should start working in restaurants now. Portland has some amazing places that can probably give her a great start, even if it's cutting veggies.
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lonelyahavaCall me Ahava ~~She/Her~~Move to New ZealandRegistered Userregular
second antenatal class tonight.
tonight was all about optimal fetus positions, the stages of labour and the labour time line.
I think I'm actually feeling even more nervous after the class than I was going in.
I know logicall how things go. I mean, I've been raised by 2 nurses and mom worked up on labour & delivery (as a pediatric nurse) for years. so I know the basics.
But there's a difference between knowing and 'ohgod i'm going to be doing the doing'.
I dunno. I wonder if I'd be better off just being completely ignorant going in. I know that's silly. But still. the whole thing is just nerve wracking.
And to be asked 'so do you want to use the pool?' I have no idea! I'm not in labour yet!
tonight was all about optimal fetus positions, the stages of labour and the labour time line.
I think I'm actually feeling even more nervous after the class than I was going in.
I know logicall how things go. I mean, I've been raised by 2 nurses and mom worked up on labour & delivery (as a pediatric nurse) for years. so I know the basics.
But there's a difference between knowing and 'ohgod i'm going to be doing the doing'.
I dunno. I wonder if I'd be better off just being completely ignorant going in. I know that's silly. But still. the whole thing is just nerve wracking.
And to be asked 'so do you want to use the pool?' I have no idea! I'm not in labour yet!
it's very distracting! and scary! and ahhh!
Since my wife was on pretty strict bed rest from like, month 3 at least, we didn't even get the option to go to any classes heh
Well I'm super happy to report that my niece's sixteenth birthday party was a complete success. Both her parents came and everyone got along perfectly. We played cooking themed games as she wants to go to culinary school and she got a new cell phone from another uncle and driver's Ed from her dad. We had about 40 people in all and the results were multiple tears on her part. She was completely surprised and overwhelmed which was a really nice feeling.
We also had a really fun sleepover the night before where she had a friend come with her to our house and Chinese food was eaten and Ticket to Ride was played too.
Now we're all half dead recovering today
She should start working in restaurants now. Portland has some amazing places that can probably give her a great start, even if it's cutting veggies.
She's actually been looking for work now - unfortunately since she lives in Lewiston except for weekends with us she's been focusing her search up in that area. Over the summer though it would be a great option.
I Liked my pre natal classes,they were rather non-judgmental when it came to pain management. They listed the risks of using certain pain treatments, but assured us that they were incredibly small chances. I found out that up to a few years ago, our local hospital didn't have any epidurals... just laughing gas and Fentanyl drip. :bigfrown:
The breastfeeding class...that was a different thing altogether. I'm totally for breastfeeding, but these guys are fanatics, and not in the good way. It was one natural health nut away from "Evil Formula Companies are trying to kill your babies with chemicals, and if you ever use formula, even once, you're going to make your baby into a drooling, decrepit idiot"
Of course, one of the pregnant women had to start an argument with the breastfeeding lady... ugh, I'd rather listen to an Huckabee vs Dawkins argument on religion.
I Liked my pre natal classes,they were rather non-judgmental when it came to pain management. They listed the risks of using certain pain treatments, but assured us that they were incredibly small chances. I found out that up to a few years ago, our local hospital didn't have any epidurals... just laughing gas and Fentanyl drip. :bigfrown:
The breastfeeding class...that was a different thing altogether. I'm totally for breastfeeding, but these guys are fanatics, and not in the good way. It was one natural health nut away from "Evil Formula Companies are trying to kill your babies with chemicals, and if you ever use formula, even once, you're going to make your baby into a drooling, decrepit idiot"
Of course, one of the pregnant women had to start an argument with the breastfeeding lady... ugh, I'd rather listen to an Huckabee vs Dawkins argument on religion.
There's a reason I like to call them the Lechinistas.
I Liked my pre natal classes,they were rather non-judgmental when it came to pain management. They listed the risks of using certain pain treatments, but assured us that they were incredibly small chances. I found out that up to a few years ago, our local hospital didn't have any epidurals... just laughing gas and Fentanyl drip. :bigfrown:
The breastfeeding class...that was a different thing altogether. I'm totally for breastfeeding, but these guys are fanatics, and not in the good way. It was one natural health nut away from "Evil Formula Companies are trying to kill your babies with chemicals, and if you ever use formula, even once, you're going to make your baby into a drooling, decrepit idiot"
Of course, one of the pregnant women had to start an argument with the breastfeeding lady... ugh, I'd rather listen to an Huckabee vs Dawkins argument on religion.
I think I've mentioned this here before, but in one of the mom groups that my wife is in, one lady was having problems getting her milk in and asked the people for recommendations for formula and the people in the group just savagely attacked her. It was so disgusting.
I find online groups that are for a specific thing tend to attract super dramatic people. So I can imagine breastfeeding groups probably have like 30% people who wanted to learn things and help each other, and 70% crazy people who think breastfeeding is magic and criticize people who don't.
My oldest daughter has some anaphylactic food allergies, so my wife and I joined a couple facebook groups for parents with kids who have them. It's the same way. Half the people are the nicest people and post great stuff like recipes, suggestions on substitutions, or just general support and what not. But the other half while not mean or anything are just crazy dramatic. It makes my eyes roll out of my head reading the stuff sometimes, but you have to ignore the bad to get to the good sometimes with stuff like that.
Last pregnancy, I read a lot of random online forums for pregnant ladies. People can get so very crazy.
One thing I determined about birth plans is that they can be very important in deciding what you think you want to do. But you may definately change your mind during. . Just be aware of what you can change.
A lot of moms got very angry at their doctors for having valid medical reasons whytheir birth plans wouldn't work. Yes, some doctors have medical opinions, but don't dismiss them just because you have the perfect birth in your head.
Also, you are not a failure if you do change your mind. You may not want an epidural at first, but if after 30 hours of labor you get one, that is not a failure. It is just a readjustment based on current circumstances.
But there is a lot that goes on, and it is good to know what your want to do ahead of time.
If that's all there is my friends, then let's keep dancing
My wife's in a Facebook group for parents of kids with glasses and there are bizzarre fights about what kind of glasses its best to put on your kids. If you don't go with Miraflex then God help you, your kids eyes are going to explode, and it's like good golly you idiots, try to find a dumber argument somewhere else please and leave us alone.
Parents are the worst sometimes and groups of parents are the double worst.
We didn't even have a birth plan. Only thing my wife wanted to do was delay cutting the cord but that was nixed when she came out with it wrapped around her neck twice.
My wife's in a Facebook group for parents of kids with glasses and there are bizzarre fights about what kind of glasses its best to put on your kids. If you don't go with Miraflex then God help you, your kids eyes are going to explode, and it's like good golly you idiots, try to find a dumber argument somewhere else please and leave us alone.
Parents are the worst sometimes and groups of parents are the double worst.
They could come here and give their opinion on well-done steaks
My children were replaced with howling evil banshee last night. When they FINALLY went to sleep at 10:45 after my youngest screamed until he threw up and we basically had to do bathrobe and bedtime AGAIN, my wife and I agreed that this is the night we will remember as the stereotypical 'bad night' once they can finally be trusted to go the fuck to sleep.
My wife's in a Facebook group for parents of kids with glasses and there are bizzarre fights about what kind of glasses its best to put on your kids. If you don't go with Miraflex then God help you, your kids eyes are going to explode, and it's like good golly you idiots, try to find a dumber argument somewhere else please and leave us alone.
Parents are the worst sometimes and groups of parents are the double worst.
They could come here and give their opinion on well-done steaks
Wait, well done steaks are a crime against man and nature! What are you trying to say!
Agree with the La Leche League often being co-opted by crazy people.
The one my wife went to for the first child wasn't just against the idea of formula, but also against the idea of ever putting breastmilk in a bottle. Seeing as how I'm 99% sure my bonding with both kids was tremendously helped by them seeing me as an alternative source of food in the early months, those people can take a hike.
And they're also big into shaming people who just can't do it. My wife tried with both our children but it was extremely painful for her. She tried and tried with #1, and felt terribly guilty that even after attending multiple nursing clinics and having many many nurses and nursing coaches try to help her it never worked.
She should never have felt any guilt, but those zealots themselves hard to ignore.
DisruptedCapitalist on
"Simple, real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time." -Mustrum Ridcully in Terry Pratchett's Hogfather p. 142 (HarperPrism 1996)
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ceresWhen the last moon is cast over the last star of morningAnd the future has past without even a last desperate warningRegistered User, Moderatormod
My feelings on breastfeeding are fairly nuanced. I've put MYSELF through hell over it. It's a complicated and emotional topic.
Mom's groups are fucking terrible in my experience though.
And it seems like all is dying, and would leave the world to mourn
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Mojo_JojoWe are only now beginning to understand the full power and ramifications of sexual intercourseRegistered Userregular
Scan 2 complete. Parasite has all the correct parts.
We had to go for a walk halfway through to try and shake it into the right position. Which is sort of weird to think about.
Homogeneous distribution of your varieties of amuse-gueule
There's also a reasonable argument that the touted benefits of breastfeeding are massively overblown. A lot of the talking points are either from flawed studies or based on numbers that aren't adjusted for basic social factors like income.
Trying to re-enforce numbers, colors and language skills leads to this lovely exchange.
Wife: How old is Olive (the dog)? Little guy: Don't know. Wife: 7
Wife: How old are you? Little guy: Don't know. Wife: 2
Wife: How old is mom and dad? Little guy: OLD!
Yes comparably it's true but way to sugar coat it :bigfrown:
I had huge problems breastfeeding our first son. The health visitor who ran the local "breastfeeding support" clinic was absolutely useless and seemed to just be there for tea and gossip. We drove an hour away to a La Leche League group and the woman there was absolutely wonderful. She actually took the time to watch him feed and helped with different positions. She gave loads of suggestions and even followed up with a phone call to see how it was going. I would never have been able to continue without her help.
She wasn't at all fanatical; just a very kind, patient, experienced lady who was very helpful. Maybe they are less fanatical in the UK?
Our second son took to the breast straight away like a chubby little champion :biggrin:
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ShadowfireVermont, in the middle of nowhereRegistered Userregular
We didn't even have a birth plan. Only thing my wife wanted to do was delay cutting the cord but that was nixed when she came out with it wrapped around her neck twice.
When the nurses asked us what our birth plan was, we said "have a baby." They were pretty satisfied with that answer.
By the way, I really don't understand this new thing about delaying cutting the cord. The baby's been feeding off the thing for 9 months but one extra minute is supposed to give the baby extra stuff???????? It makes no sense.
By the way, I really don't understand this new thing about delaying cutting the cord. The baby's been feeding off the thing for 9 months but one extra minute is supposed to give the baby extra stuff???????? It makes no sense.
It's not about feeding. It's because a not-marginal amount of the baby's blood is still in the placenta and umbilical cord when the baby is born. The idea is that you delay clamping/cutting a few minutes longer so pulsating ceases and the baby gets more of the blood in its system instead of leaving it in the placenta/cord.
My feelings on breastfeeding are fairly nuanced. I've put MYSELF through hell over it. It's a complicated and emotional topic.
Mom's groups are fucking terrible in my experience though.
Yeah I should clarify that my wife didn't interact directly with any leche league zealots. She just made the mistake of turning to internet searches to find answers on her condition. The nurses at the nursing clinic were very understanding and sympathetic.
"Simple, real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time." -Mustrum Ridcully in Terry Pratchett's Hogfather p. 142 (HarperPrism 1996)
By the way, I really don't understand this new thing about delaying cutting the cord. The baby's been feeding off the thing for 9 months but one extra minute is supposed to give the baby extra stuff???????? It makes no sense.
It's not about feeding. It's because a not-marginal amount of the baby's blood is still in the placenta and umbilical cord when the baby is born. The idea is that you delay clamping/cutting a few minutes longer so pulsating ceases and the baby gets more of the blood in its system instead of leaving it in the placenta/cord.
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We repeated this Monday night. We repeated this TWICE on Tuesday night. Last night she started up when we were putting her down first thing for the night, which is unheard of. She's been going to bed well for months and months now. So my wife and I ended up sitting at the dining room table, listening to her yell and scream and cry, feeling just AWFUL, but with the knowledge that going in there is the one thing we can't do, because it's why she's behaving this way. She lasted twenty minutes before she passed out, and then she slept a straight 10.5 through the night.
My best guess is she's been getting more willful of late, throwing the odd temper tantrum when she doesn't get something she wants, so she started applying it to sleeping and/or being away from us at night. Only problem is unlike a daytime temper tantrum, you can't redirect them at night, because that's exactly what they want.
It straight up sucks. She's always been a kid where intervening always meant continuing the process, and leaving her be was the fastest way for her to go to sleep. I'm hoping that she learns quickly that this isn't going to work. I don't want to do many more nights like this.
My little girl only feels comfortable sleeping on her side and occasionally her back. I've watched her enough now to know that she never rolled onto her face so I'm not quite as worried as I was when she was born. And boy, does she hate having her arms swaddled.
Happy one week old honey!
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Anyone seen a ball somewhere around here?
...Nope, haven't seen it.
"Draw me like one of your French girls Jack."
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We also had a really fun sleepover the night before where she had a friend come with her to our house and Chinese food was eaten and Ticket to Ride was played too.
Now we're all half dead recovering today
She should start working in restaurants now. Portland has some amazing places that can probably give her a great start, even if it's cutting veggies.
tonight was all about optimal fetus positions, the stages of labour and the labour time line.
I think I'm actually feeling even more nervous after the class than I was going in.
I know logicall how things go. I mean, I've been raised by 2 nurses and mom worked up on labour & delivery (as a pediatric nurse) for years. so I know the basics.
But there's a difference between knowing and 'ohgod i'm going to be doing the doing'.
I dunno. I wonder if I'd be better off just being completely ignorant going in. I know that's silly. But still. the whole thing is just nerve wracking.
And to be asked 'so do you want to use the pool?' I have no idea! I'm not in labour yet!
it's very distracting! and scary! and ahhh!
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So I guess this is my life now.
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Since my wife was on pretty strict bed rest from like, month 3 at least, we didn't even get the option to go to any classes heh
She's actually been looking for work now - unfortunately since she lives in Lewiston except for weekends with us she's been focusing her search up in that area. Over the summer though it would be a great option.
The breastfeeding class...that was a different thing altogether. I'm totally for breastfeeding, but these guys are fanatics, and not in the good way. It was one natural health nut away from "Evil Formula Companies are trying to kill your babies with chemicals, and if you ever use formula, even once, you're going to make your baby into a drooling, decrepit idiot"
Of course, one of the pregnant women had to start an argument with the breastfeeding lady... ugh, I'd rather listen to an Huckabee vs Dawkins argument on religion.
WoW
Dear Satan.....
There's a reason I like to call them the Lechinistas.
I think I've mentioned this here before, but in one of the mom groups that my wife is in, one lady was having problems getting her milk in and asked the people for recommendations for formula and the people in the group just savagely attacked her. It was so disgusting.
PSN/Steam/NNID: SyphonBlue | BNet: SyphonBlue#1126
My oldest daughter has some anaphylactic food allergies, so my wife and I joined a couple facebook groups for parents with kids who have them. It's the same way. Half the people are the nicest people and post great stuff like recipes, suggestions on substitutions, or just general support and what not. But the other half while not mean or anything are just crazy dramatic. It makes my eyes roll out of my head reading the stuff sometimes, but you have to ignore the bad to get to the good sometimes with stuff like that.
One thing I determined about birth plans is that they can be very important in deciding what you think you want to do. But you may definately change your mind during. . Just be aware of what you can change.
A lot of moms got very angry at their doctors for having valid medical reasons whytheir birth plans wouldn't work. Yes, some doctors have medical opinions, but don't dismiss them just because you have the perfect birth in your head.
Also, you are not a failure if you do change your mind. You may not want an epidural at first, but if after 30 hours of labor you get one, that is not a failure. It is just a readjustment based on current circumstances.
But there is a lot that goes on, and it is good to know what your want to do ahead of time.
Parents are the worst sometimes and groups of parents are the double worst.
PSN/Steam/NNID: SyphonBlue | BNet: SyphonBlue#1126
They could come here and give their opinion on well-done steaks
Wait, well done steaks are a crime against man and nature! What are you trying to say!
The one my wife went to for the first child wasn't just against the idea of formula, but also against the idea of ever putting breastmilk in a bottle. Seeing as how I'm 99% sure my bonding with both kids was tremendously helped by them seeing me as an alternative source of food in the early months, those people can take a hike.
She should never have felt any guilt, but those zealots themselves hard to ignore.
Mom's groups are fucking terrible in my experience though.
We had to go for a walk halfway through to try and shake it into the right position. Which is sort of weird to think about.
Wife: How old is Olive (the dog)? Little guy: Don't know. Wife: 7
Wife: How old are you? Little guy: Don't know. Wife: 2
Wife: How old is mom and dad? Little guy: OLD!
Yes comparably it's true but way to sugar coat it :bigfrown:
She wasn't at all fanatical; just a very kind, patient, experienced lady who was very helpful. Maybe they are less fanatical in the UK?
Our second son took to the breast straight away like a chubby little champion :biggrin:
When the nurses asked us what our birth plan was, we said "have a baby." They were pretty satisfied with that answer.
PSN/Steam/NNID: SyphonBlue | BNet: SyphonBlue#1126
It's not about feeding. It's because a not-marginal amount of the baby's blood is still in the placenta and umbilical cord when the baby is born. The idea is that you delay clamping/cutting a few minutes longer so pulsating ceases and the baby gets more of the blood in its system instead of leaving it in the placenta/cord.
http://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2015/05/26/409697568/delayed-umbilical-cord-clamping-may-benefit-children-years-later
Yeah I should clarify that my wife didn't interact directly with any leche league zealots. She just made the mistake of turning to internet searches to find answers on her condition. The nurses at the nursing clinic were very understanding and sympathetic.
Literally less than a week until baby is supposed to be here.
I am super lucky that I have enough vacation/holiday time banked that I'll be home for most of the first three months.
I know you're never actually ready, but I am now as ready as I could ever be.
Ah, thanks.
PSN/Steam/NNID: SyphonBlue | BNet: SyphonBlue#1126
cord blood banking.
is it a thing that's readily done in the states?
cause it's an option down here, but it requires an initial deposit of some moneys and then a yearly fee.
was just wondering if that was something that any of you had done/talked about/thought about.
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