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[Bad Food Thread] "I'd stick with soylent. Never know what chimera that meat came from..."

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    XaquinXaquin Right behind you!Registered User regular
    Chicken with banana is a crime

    Of course, bananas are a crime by themselves

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    ElderlycrawfishElderlycrawfish Registered User regular
    Milky banana chicken with peas and carrots sounds more like a dare than a legit food dish.

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    rhylithrhylith Death Rabbits HoustonRegistered User regular
    Ugh, that made me go look at the 70s dinner party twitter again and now I feel sick.

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    LalaboxLalabox Registered User regular
    it's just chickens covered in white sauce

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    JedocJedoc In the scuppers with the staggers and jagsRegistered User regular
    I can kind of see where they were going with the sauce. It's kind of a country gravy that they tried to turn into alfredo sauce halfway through. The banana slices just seem spiteful, though.

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    LalaboxLalabox Registered User regular
    one day i should find that one women's weekly recipe for Duck a L'orange which included fanta in its ingredients, and began with "take one chicken"

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    The Escape GoatThe Escape Goat incorrigible ruminant they/themRegistered User regular
    edited April 2017
    Xaquin wrote: »
    Chicken with banana is a crime

    Of course, bananas are a crime by themselves

    iLD8AKI.png?1

    The Escape Goat on
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    Centipede DamascusCentipede Damascus Registered User regular
    Burgers with pizza sauce on them are good

    I've put some slices of pepperoni on my burger before, it's a good combo

    I don't know why I haven't seen a restaurant with a "pizza burger" like that yet

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    XaquinXaquin Right behind you!Registered User regular
    Xaquin wrote: »
    Chicken with banana is a crime

    Of course, bananas are a crime by themselves

    iLD8AKI.png?1

    OR

    will I stasis you, hit you 5 times, watch you convulse until you explode, and then take your money?

    ....

    that sounds better if you've played the game

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    The Escape GoatThe Escape Goat incorrigible ruminant they/themRegistered User regular
    Xaquin wrote: »
    Xaquin wrote: »
    Chicken with banana is a crime

    Of course, bananas are a crime by themselves

    iLD8AKI.png?1

    OR

    will I stasis you, hit you 5 times, watch you convulse until you explode, and then take your money?

    ....

    that sounds better if you've played the game

    I haven't, so that is pretty strange.

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    VeldrinVeldrin Sham bam bamina Registered User regular
    Lalabox wrote: »
    it's just chickens covered in white sauce

    so awful chicken then

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    jgeisjgeis Registered User regular
    Lalabox wrote: »
    ok they boil the chickens, that's just not on

    edit: i misunderstood, they don't boil the chickens

    No, you were right the first time. You're supposed to put the whole chickens into the large saucepan with celery and water and boil the shit out of them.

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    LalaboxLalabox Registered User regular
    Veldrin wrote: »
    Lalabox wrote: »
    it's just chickens covered in white sauce

    so awful chicken then

    sure, it doesn't sound that nice, especially since they apparently do boil the chickens

    but it's not profoundly awful or anything

    it's not incomprehensibly awful

    they're not encasing it in jelly or anything

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    #pipe#pipe Cocky Stride, Musky odours Pope of Chili TownRegistered User regular
    Xaquin wrote: »
    Chicken with banana is a crime

    Of course, bananas are a crime by themselves

    iLD8AKI.png?1

    The Yigas are ridiculous
    jpg

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    VeldrinVeldrin Sham bam bamina Registered User regular
    Lalabox wrote: »
    Veldrin wrote: »
    Lalabox wrote: »
    it's just chickens covered in white sauce

    so awful chicken then

    sure, it doesn't sound that nice, especially since they apparently do boil the chickens

    but it's not profoundly awful or anything

    it's not incomprehensibly awful

    they're not encasing it in jelly or anything

    Oh no, I just hate white sauce.

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    LalaboxLalabox Registered User regular
    Veldrin wrote: »
    Lalabox wrote: »
    Veldrin wrote: »
    Lalabox wrote: »
    it's just chickens covered in white sauce

    so awful chicken then

    sure, it doesn't sound that nice, especially since they apparently do boil the chickens

    but it's not profoundly awful or anything

    it's not incomprehensibly awful

    they're not encasing it in jelly or anything

    Oh no, I just hate white sauce.

    what is your opinion on lasagne?

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    The Escape GoatThe Escape Goat incorrigible ruminant they/themRegistered User regular
    white sauce is a different thing than white wine sauce, right?

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    VeldrinVeldrin Sham bam bamina Registered User regular
    Lalabox wrote: »
    Veldrin wrote: »
    Lalabox wrote: »
    Veldrin wrote: »
    Lalabox wrote: »
    it's just chickens covered in white sauce

    so awful chicken then

    sure, it doesn't sound that nice, especially since they apparently do boil the chickens

    but it's not profoundly awful or anything

    it's not incomprehensibly awful

    they're not encasing it in jelly or anything

    Oh no, I just hate white sauce.

    what is your opinion on lasagne?

    Depending on the amount of white sauce, it ranges from "ugh" to "hurk".

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    VeldrinVeldrin Sham bam bamina Registered User regular
    Basically, white sauce reminds me of Ash's malfunction scene in Alien.

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    LalaboxLalabox Registered User regular
    fair

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    Lost SalientLost Salient blink twice if you'd like me to mercy kill youRegistered User regular
    I thought this was the bad food thread.

    I totally want to try this for a party.

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    I love you.
    Here's the recipe:

    Vintage Recipe Cards
    Milk Chicken

    iamsurly
    2 years ago
    milk_checking

    Cooking time: 1 – 1/2 hours
    Preparation time: 15 mins
    Main cooking utensil: large saucepan

    For 6-8 people you need:
    2 small roasting chickens, approximately 2 1/2 lb. (when trussed)
    2 stalks celery
    2 1/2 cups water
    seasoning
    2 tablespoons flour
    1 1/4 cups milk
    2 tablespoons butter
    1 egg yolk

    Garnish:
    1-2 hard-cooked eggs
    1-2 bananas
    cooked mixed vegetables

    1. Put the whole chickens (or joint them if pan is not sufficiently large) into pan, add diced celery, water, and seasoning.

    2. Bring to boil; remove any scum from the top of the liquid, cover pan, lower heat, simmer gently – allow 45 minutes for jointed chicken, 1 hour for whole birds – until tender but unbroken; lift onto hot dish.

    3. Blend flour with half the milk, stir into stock, cook until thickened.

    4. Add the butter and the egg blended with the remainder of the milk, and COOK GENTLY without boiling for several minutes.

    5. Strain some of the sauce over the birds, then garnish with the sliced hard-cooked egg, bananas, and vegetables.

    TO SERVE: With the rest of the sauce and mashed potatoes

    TO VARY: Serve with cooked macaroni instead of potatoes; add a little cream and sherry to the sauce at step 4.

    No seriously, marry me.

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    "Sandra has a good solid anti-murderer vibe. My skin felt very secure and sufficiently attached to my body when I met her. Also my organs." HAIL SATAN
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    LalaboxLalabox Registered User regular
    i do like how so many of the old recipes have at least one variation at the end that just changes it up completely


    like there's this Orange Onion Salad in one of the books i found a bit ago, and at the end it says "turn this into an artichoke salad: add 14. oz tin of drained artichoke heads. Toss"

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    LalaboxLalabox Registered User regular
    edited April 2017
    oh dear i just noticed a salad recipe that i hadn't seen before (also this book has a weird layout and tried to give measurements in both imperial and metric)
    Banana Salad

    Bring the tropics to the table. The Kids love it.

    Bananas 3 3
    Finely chopped nuts 1/2 cup 125ml
    Lettuce leaves

    Whipping cream
    (or 1 evelope topping) 1/4 cup 50ml
    Mayonnaise 1/4 cup 50ml

    Cut banas in half crosswise, then in half again lengthwise. Dip each piece in lemon juice. Roll in nuts and arrange on lettuce leaves. This can be done on one large playe or on individual small playtes.

    Whip cream until stiff. Mix in mayonnaise. Spoon over banaas.

    Variation: Omit nuts. Roll in toasted coconut.


    Unfortunately lacks any pictures

    Lalabox on
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    tynictynic PICNIC BADASS Registered User, ClubPA regular
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    BlankZoeBlankZoe Registered User regular
    Wait

    Is that

    thirty three bananas

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    VeldrinVeldrin Sham bam bamina Registered User regular
    Ahahaha oh man

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    Lost SalientLost Salient blink twice if you'd like me to mercy kill youRegistered User regular
    yesssssss

    RUVCwyu.jpg
    "Sandra has a good solid anti-murderer vibe. My skin felt very secure and sufficiently attached to my body when I met her. Also my organs." HAIL SATAN
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    LalaboxLalabox Registered User regular
    Blankzilla wrote: »
    Wait

    Is that

    thirty three bananas

    no it's giving the amount of bananas in both imperial and metric measures

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    tynictynic PICNIC BADASS Registered User, ClubPA regular
    related: I've just updated my "food I think is weird" list

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    LalaboxLalabox Registered User regular
    one imperial banana is worth one metric banana

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    BlankZoeBlankZoe Registered User regular
    Oh thank Christ

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    tynictynic PICNIC BADASS Registered User, ClubPA regular
    Lalabox wrote: »
    one imperial banana is worth one metric banana

    What? I've been lied to by UKIP yet again!

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    #pipe#pipe Cocky Stride, Musky odours Pope of Chili TownRegistered User regular
    white sauce is a different thing than white wine sauce, right?

    White Sauce is Bechemel. A mother sauce on which a bunch of other sauces are based including Country Gravy. A roux with milk to thin it out.

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    tynictynic PICNIC BADASS Registered User, ClubPA regular
    i'm hungry and I don't think breakfast is available for another two hours
    fortunately this discussion is really helping with that.

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    The Escape GoatThe Escape Goat incorrigible ruminant they/themRegistered User regular
    #pipe wrote: »
    white sauce is a different thing than white wine sauce, right?

    White Sauce is Bechemel. A mother sauce on which a bunch of other sauces are based including Country Gravy. A roux with milk to thin it out.

    Ooooh okay. Yeah I love bechemel, pastitso is one of my fav Greek dishes

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    Commander ZoomCommander Zoom Registered User regular
    Psykoma wrote: »
    #pipe wrote: »
    Kadith wrote: »
    what about a pizza burger?

    or burger pizza??

    A Canadian Family Eatery calls this a Pizzaburger
    482339_10151343464685458_1819492342_n.jpg

    I've ordered that before, and it did not look like that picture, it basically looked the same from the bottom up to the top of the patty, then the cheese and toppings were like half a cm high and then the other three quarters of the cavity were just empty air.
    I was supremely underwhelmed.

    Food photography always lies.
    Always.

    (This goes both ways - some of the horrors of the past showcased by Lileks et al actually don't taste too bad, they just look awful to our 21st century eyes.)

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    LalaboxLalabox Registered User regular
    i wish i had a photo of the nutty bananas covered in whipped cream an mayo and presented on lettuce leaves

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    tynictynic PICNIC BADASS Registered User, ClubPA regular
    Actually there are strict regulations about how much food photography is allowed to lie! For example, they can't add more food quantity to a demo picture on an ad like that. But they can move it around all they like. So some hapless food stylist spent twenty minutes pushing all the cheese to the cut plane of that calzone, and tweaking the pepperoni placement with tweezers.

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    OptyOpty Registered User regular
    bowen wrote: »
    Kadith wrote: »
    what about a pizza burger?

    or burger pizza??

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    BahamutZEROBahamutZERO Registered User, Moderator mod
    I'm getting nauseous looking at those

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