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Humanity has jumped the shark

HunterHunter Chemist with a heart of AuRegistered User regular
edited April 2007 in Singularity Engine++
I read a lot of letters to the editor. I enjoy reading the ramblings of the generally ignorant masses trying to scribble their addled thoughts on paper and get them printed by the local news. I've seen a lot of stupid during my time reading these things. Not just things I have differing opinions on. I can live with that. I'm talking about people saying things so stupid, it just makes you feel numb inside. I present you with this letter written by Ms. Connie M. Meskimen of Hot Springs, Arkansas. We are all doomed.

Daylight exacerbates warning

You may have noticed that March of this year was particularly hot. As a matter of fact, I understand that it was the hottest March since the beginning of the last century. All of the trees were fully leafed out and legions of bugs and snakes were crawling around during a time in Arkansas when, on a normal year, we might see a snowflake or two. This should come as no surprise to any reasonable person. As you know, Daylight Saving Time started almost a month early this year. You would think that members of Congress would have considered the warming effect that an extra hour of daylight would have on our climate. Or did they ? Perhaps this is another plot by a liberal Congress to make us believe that global warming is a real threat. Perhaps next time there should be serious studies performed before Congress passes laws with such far-reaching effects.
CONNIE M. MESKIMEN / Hot Springs



http://www.nwanews.com/adg/Editorial/187608

TL;DR: DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME ADDS MORE SUNLIGHT TO EARTH CAUSING THE GLOBAL WARMING EFFECT!

Yes folks, by adjusting clocks an hour ahead a month earlier this year, we actually added 1 hour of sunlight to the earth for that longer period. Daylight savings time is causing more solar rays to hit the earth, thus causing warming. The liberal congress can now control how much sunlight a given spot on the earth receives in an effort to promote their anti-industrial global warming agenda. Next, terrorist leader Destro Bin Laden of the Al-Ja Cobra cell will create a Weather Dominator to control us all and then make out with the Baroness.

Hunter on
«1345

Posts

  • AslanAslan Registered User
    edited April 2007
    Fucking liberals.

    Aslan on
    Captain_Renault.gif I'm shocked...shocked, to find faggotry in this thread.
  • Penguin IncarnatePenguin Incarnate King of Kafiristan Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
  • RankenphileRankenphile Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood.Registered User, Moderator mod
    edited April 2007
    I like sharks.

    Rankenphile on
  • SharpieSharpie Registered User
    edited April 2007
    I am twitching here. Too much stupid.

    Sharpie on
    pasig.jpgPW2.jpg
  • SephSeph Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    oh yea this is what makes humanity jump the shark?

    not eels in the ass

    or cock severing

    or mrhands

    the fox dildo?

    oh no its this one

    =/

    Seph on
    doit.png
  • taoistlumberjaktaoistlumberjak Registered User
    edited April 2007
    Logic only a woman could use

    taoistlumberjak on
    grillsgrillsgrills.jpg
  • SephSeph Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    women, bad at directions and also global conspiracy

    Seph on
    doit.png
  • WevsWevs __BANNED USERS
    edited April 2007
    Why would they publish that.

    Wevs on
  • JavenJaven Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    Wevs wrote: »
    Why would they publish that.

    Because it's really fucking funny?

    Javen on
    bar-cc-1.jpg
  • AslanAslan Registered User
    edited April 2007
    Seph wrote: »
    oh yea this is what makes humanity jump the shark?

    not eels in the ass

    or cock severing

    or mrhands

    the fox dildo?

    oh no its this one

    =/


    Or the guy who died from horse-fucking?
    Or the guy who drowned in elephant shit?

    Humanity has been jumping sharks since we hopped out of the pond.

    Aslan on
    Captain_Renault.gif I'm shocked...shocked, to find faggotry in this thread.
  • Bendery It Like BeckhamBendery It Like Beckham Hopeless Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    Impressive.

    Call the ninja Turtles!

    Bendery It Like Beckham on
    headphones2.jpg
  • HunterHunter Chemist with a heart of Au Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    Wevs wrote: »
    Why would they publish that.

    A newspaper so fair and balanced, it even publishes the ramblings of complete morons.

    Hunter on
  • Penguin IncarnatePenguin Incarnate King of Kafiristan Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    Is there a reply to it? Because I doubt something stupid like that would be allowed to stand un-harrassed.

    Penguin Incarnate on
  • lostwordslostwords Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    Javen wrote: »
    Wevs wrote: »
    Why would they publish that.

    Because it's really fucking funny?

    Probably the most intelligent letter they received from conservative nutjobs.

    lostwords on
    rat.jpg tumbler? steam/ps3 thingie: lostwords Amazon Wishlist!
  • RankenphileRankenphile Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood.Registered User, Moderator mod
    edited April 2007
    this is actually pretty fucking funny

    shit, I'm going to adjust the hands on my Personal Portable Chronographic Time-Controller right now so I can sleep in a bit more.

    It's a pretty sweet one, too. It's a Fossil.

    Rankenphile on
  • JavenJaven Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    Man, if I heard a dumb bitch say something like this, I would tell anyone who would listen.

    These guys just have a better way of getting the word out.

    Javen on
    bar-cc-1.jpg
  • PiptheFairPiptheFair Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    oh wow

    uh


    wow

    PiptheFair on
    STEAM
    Skayel wrote:
    One time, I had a friend over to play a bit of Red Alert on my LAN. During the game he said he needed to go to the bathroom, so we paused it. After about 10 minutes of wondering where the hell he went, I get up and go to check on him.

    Turns out he was trying to screw my dog.
    Once I was taking a poop at a restaurant and a kid crept underneath the door into my stall. I let out a big fart and then he threw up all over the floor in front of me and I just stared at him.
  • MeizMeiz Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    More hard evidence that women are batshit insane.

    Meiz on
  • <3<3 Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    They fuck their cousins down in Arkansas.

    <3 on
  • RedeemerRedeemer Registered User
    edited April 2007
    Hahahahahaha

    Redeemer on
    25jyxzr.jpg
  • Der Waffle MousDer Waffle Mous three times snugglier New Yark, New Yark.Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    This is the most retarded conspiracy I have ever heard.


    And I spent most of last night reading up on retarded conspiracy theories.

    Der Waffle Mous on
    zaku.png
    Steam PSN: DerWaffleMous Origin: DerWaffleMous Bnet: DerWaffle#1682
  • SephSeph Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    the best conspiracy theories are the zionists

    Seph on
    doit.png
  • JordynJordyn Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    For "the hottest March ever" I sure was fucking cold.

    Jordyn on
    thumbsupguy-1.jpg
    JordynNolz.com <- All my blogs (Shepard, Wasted, J'onn, DCAU) are here now!
  • HunterHunter Chemist with a heart of Au Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    Is there a reply to it? Because I doubt something stupid like that would be allowed to stand un-harrassed.

    I've written three replies so far and can't send them because they're far to insulting, even for me. I'm actually amazed that anyone this stupid could survive long enough to be able to write something like this.

    Hunter on
  • ThatDudeOverThereThatDudeOverThere Clock King Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    Arkansas? Shit.

    That's where most of my family's from.




    ...explains a lot, really.

    ThatDudeOverThere on
  • SegSeg Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    Jordyn wrote: »
    For "the hottest March ever" I sure was fucking cold.

    Welcome to WA State.

    Seg on
  • Lord DaveLord Dave Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    It's a joke.

    Hooray for copy-pasting silly shit you find on the blagoblog!

    Lord Dave on
    Denny's is for winners.
    mkc.pngmkc.pngmkc.pngmontykevin.png
  • FAQFAQ Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    It seemed to stupid to be true

    FAQ on
  • MarathonMarathon Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    Jordyn wrote: »
    For "the hottest March ever" I sure was fucking cold.

    My "hottest March ever" consisted of a blizzard that dropped nearly a foot of snow and about a week and a half of near zero temperatures.

    Marathon on
    Dumb Hero wrote: »
    "Okay, you take 2d4 damage from the ogre's dick impaling your 2inch anus"
    Satan! Look here!
  • HunterHunter Chemist with a heart of Au Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    Lord Dave wrote: »
    It's a joke.

    Hooray for copy-pasting silly shit you find on the blagoblog!

    I've never been to blagoblog, but I did find it on a site where people share LTTE with people. Where did you see it was fake?

    Hunter on
  • Lord DaveLord Dave Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    FAQ wrote: »
    It seemed to stupid to be true

    Has Krieger Von Vergultung started a trend were we all leave one grammatical mistake in every post?

    Lord Dave on
    Denny's is for winners.
    mkc.pngmkc.pngmkc.pngmontykevin.png
  • AslanAslan Registered User
    edited April 2007
    Lord Dave wrote: »
    FAQ wrote: »
    It seemed to stupid to be true

    Has Krieger Von Vergultung started a trend were we all leave one grammatical mistake in every post?

    Man, I hope not,

    Aslan on
    Captain_Renault.gif I'm shocked...shocked, to find faggotry in this thread.
  • Lord DaveLord Dave Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    Hunter wrote: »
    Lord Dave wrote: »
    It's a joke.

    Hooray for copy-pasting silly shit you find on the blagoblog!

    I've never been to blagoblog, but I did find it on a site where people share LTTE with people. Where did you see it was fake?

    There's an actual blagoblog now?

    This guy is a detective like Batman.

    Lord Dave on
    Denny's is for winners.
    mkc.pngmkc.pngmkc.pngmontykevin.png
  • JordynJordyn Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    Seg wrote: »
    Jordyn wrote: »
    For "the hottest March ever" I sure was fucking cold.

    Welcome to WA State.

    Hey.

    It was fucking colder in SD.

    Jordyn on
    thumbsupguy-1.jpg
    JordynNolz.com <- All my blogs (Shepard, Wasted, J'onn, DCAU) are here now!
  • HunterHunter Chemist with a heart of Au Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    Lord Dave wrote: »
    Hunter wrote: »
    Lord Dave wrote: »
    It's a joke.

    Hooray for copy-pasting silly shit you find on the blagoblog!

    I've never been to blagoblog, but I did find it on a site where people share LTTE with people. Where did you see it was fake?

    There's an actual blagoblog now?

    This guy is a detective like Batman.

    How does that show it was fake again? Because a lawyer shares the name and may or may not be the writer? Hell, the guy assumes lawyers are smart. Right there it shows me he is a shitty detective.

    Hunter on
  • Lord DaveLord Dave Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    Hunter wrote: »
    Lord Dave wrote: »
    Hunter wrote: »
    Lord Dave wrote: »
    It's a joke.

    Hooray for copy-pasting silly shit you find on the blagoblog!

    I've never been to blagoblog, but I did find it on a site where people share LTTE with people. Where did you see it was fake?

    There's an actual blagoblog now?

    This guy is a detective like Batman.

    How does that show it was fake again? Because a lawyer shares the name and may or may not be the writer? Hell, the guy assumes lawyers are smart. Right there it shows me he is a shitty detective.

    So what you are saying is you were unable to read farther than one paragraph into that page?

    Lord Dave on
    Denny's is for winners.
    mkc.pngmkc.pngmkc.pngmontykevin.png
  • GABBO GABBO GABBOGABBO GABBO GABBO Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    God damnit. I'm home sick from work and my DVD-RW just decided to take a shit on itself. Now I cannot play any games to pass the time.

    GABBO GABBO GABBO on
  • RankenphileRankenphile Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood.Registered User, Moderator mod
    edited April 2007
    there are plenty of games you can play without a disk, mani

    be creative

    here, go play Shock Defense for a while

    Rankenphile on
  • HunterHunter Chemist with a heart of Au Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    Lord Dave wrote: »
    Hunter wrote: »
    Lord Dave wrote: »
    Hunter wrote: »
    Lord Dave wrote: »
    It's a joke.

    Hooray for copy-pasting silly shit you find on the blagoblog!

    I've never been to blagoblog, but I did find it on a site where people share LTTE with people. Where did you see it was fake?

    There's an actual blagoblog now?

    This guy is a detective like Batman.

    How does that show it was fake again? Because a lawyer shares the name and may or may not be the writer? Hell, the guy assumes lawyers are smart. Right there it shows me he is a shitty detective.

    So what you are saying is you were unable to read farther than one paragraph into that page?

    Did you take your cockbag pills today or something? He assumes lawyers are smart in paragraph four, and by the end shows nothing but it maybe 1) fake 2) satire 3) from a retarded person. Lord Dave, I expect better from you.

    Hunter on
  • FAQFAQ Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    Lord Dave wrote: »
    FAQ wrote: »
    It seemed to stupid to be true

    Has Krieger Von Vergultung started a trend were we all leave one grammatical mistake in every post?

    oh you're one of those guys

    FAQ on
«1345
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