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I was raised in the canebrake by an ol' mama lion

2

Posts

  • FutoreFutore Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    Stale wrote: »
    so if this is too personal I wont feel bad if you dont answer it, but was divorce as outrageously expensive as I have heard it to be? I met a divorce lawyer this weekend and she implied it was a very long and pricey experience.

    if it's contested, yes.

    if you have dependents, God yes.

    if you try to keep:

    a: dignity
    b: liquid assets
    c: real estate


    Holy Fuck Yes.




    Me? 18 months ago, I liquidated everything we owned, handed her a check for 95% of it, hired a truck and movers, paid for an apartment, and told her to go her own way. For the past 18, I've paid her bills every month in lieu of alimony.

    Frankly, I got off cheap.

    wait a minute, was i crotch-grabbed by a married man?

    i feel like such a naughty ladyboy

    Futore on
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  • DogDog Registered User, Administrator, Vanilla Staff admin
    edited October 2009
    307wbht.jpgrksu1l.jpg

    Unknown User on
  • Munkus BeaverMunkus Beaver You don't have to attend every argument you are invited to. Philosophy: Stoicism. Politics: Democratic SocialistRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    edited October 2009
    Stale wrote: »
    Bedigunz wrote: »
    Langly wrote: »
    Bedigunz wrote: »

    I cannot believe this exists

    long ago I stopped being surprised by what could be ordered or found on the internet.

    The best part is the match.com advertisement

    My buddy from Iowa actually started it and mentioned that I'd be perfect to make the calls.

    I honestly don't know if I can morally do it

    sign me up

    I'll fucking do it

    Shit yeah I need the cash.

    Ain't nothing morally wrong with telling someone that they got off easy by not marrying a sleaze who can't break up with them properly.

    Munkus Beaver on
    Humor can be dissected as a frog can, but dies in the process.
  • Munkus BeaverMunkus Beaver You don't have to attend every argument you are invited to. Philosophy: Stoicism. Politics: Democratic SocialistRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    edited October 2009
    Also this means that we gotta throw you a bachelor's party, Stale.

    Munkus Beaver on
    Humor can be dissected as a frog can, but dies in the process.
  • honey nut cheerioshoney nut cheerios __BANNED USERS regular
    edited October 2009
    Why knot?

    honey nut cheerios on
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  • PiptheFairPiptheFair Frequently not in boats. Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    hey I like chili's fuck you dru

    PiptheFair on
  • StaleStale Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    Also this means that we gotta throw you a bachelor's party, Stale.

    Talk to Nikki.

    Stale on
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  • BedigunzBedigunz Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    I figured SE would be all for it. If he needs extra hands, I'll pass some names along.

    I still haven't shot down the idea, but I'm on the fence. You guys are pushing me towards 'do it'.

    Bedigunz on
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    Coran Attack!
  • DruhimDruhim Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited October 2009
    Bedigunz wrote: »
    Druhim wrote: »
    Bedigunz wrote: »
    Langly wrote: »
    Bedigunz wrote: »

    I cannot believe this exists

    long ago I stopped being surprised by what could be ordered or found on the internet.

    The best part is the match.com advertisement

    My buddy from Iowa actually started it and mentioned that I'd be perfect to make the calls.

    I honestly don't know if I can morally do it

    I don't see what would be immoral about it at all for the person making the call.

    It's more the sense that you kind of have to be a dick because the calls are recorded and uploaded to youtube.

    Trust me, I can be a dick to people, but not to people who are in the process of being dumped.

    The caller ain't being a dick. At most, the person ending the relationship is.

    Druhim on
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  • Munkus BeaverMunkus Beaver You don't have to attend every argument you are invited to. Philosophy: Stoicism. Politics: Democratic SocialistRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    edited October 2009
    Stale wrote: »
    Also this means that we gotta throw you a bachelor's party, Stale.

    Talk to Nikki.

    Why should I have to talk to General Sherman, you're dating her

    Munkus Beaver on
    Humor can be dissected as a frog can, but dies in the process.
  • LanglyLangly Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    PiptheFair wrote: »
    hey I like chili's fuck you dru

    i really like chili's endless tostada chips and salsa


    mmmmm want that salsa

    Langly on
  • mullymully Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    Stale wrote: »
    Also this means that we gotta throw you a bachelor's party, Stale.

    Talk to Nikki.

    Darling Nikki?

    Last I heard, from a fellow named Prince, she was caught in a hotel lobby masturbating with a magazine.

    I don't want to imagine the paper cuts.

    mully on
  • DruhimDruhim Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited October 2009
    general Sherman, huh? :lol:

    Druhim on
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  • STATE OF THE ART ROBOTSTATE OF THE ART ROBOT Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    I think most people will think it is a joke when they get a call from a complete stranger saying their SO dumped them.

    STATE OF THE ART ROBOT on
  • StaleStale Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    mully wrote: »
    Stale wrote: »
    Also this means that we gotta throw you a bachelor's party, Stale.

    Talk to Nikki.

    Darling Nikki?

    Last I heard, from a fellow named Prince, she was caught in a hotel lobby masturbating with a magazine.

    I don't want to imagine the paper cuts.

    Sometimes I love you Mully.

    Stale on
    easysig2.jpg
  • PiptheFairPiptheFair Frequently not in boats. Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    goddamnit mully

    PiptheFair on
  • mullymully Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    ha-cha-cha.

    mully on
  • ascotascot Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    When your divorce comes through you should also get a card from the marriage and divorce research people that says 'Congratulations (We Told You So!)"

    ascot on
  • StaleStale Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    Druhim wrote: »
    general Sherman, huh? :lol:

    She's more Patton than she is Sherman.

    Stale on
    easysig2.jpg
  • Munkus BeaverMunkus Beaver You don't have to attend every argument you are invited to. Philosophy: Stoicism. Politics: Democratic SocialistRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    edited October 2009
    Stale wrote: »
    Druhim wrote: »
    general Sherman, huh? :lol:

    She's more Patton than she is Sherman.

    Patton didn't burn Atlanta to the ground

    Munkus Beaver on
    Humor can be dissected as a frog can, but dies in the process.
  • StaleStale Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    Stale wrote: »
    Druhim wrote: »
    general Sherman, huh? :lol:

    She's more Patton than she is Sherman.

    Patton didn't burn Atlanta to the ground

    Granted.

    Stale on
    easysig2.jpg
  • HunterHunter Chemist with a heart of Au Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    Stale, sing the Psycho Dad song with me. Grats on your new found freedom.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8GFq6usPg6U

    Hunter on
  • cadmunkycadmunky One hand on the bottle, The other a shaking fist.Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    grats dan!

    that feelin....like god's own mercy. i can almost feel you dancing from here.

    cadmunky on
    5955603848_aed2690084.jpg
    "Think of it as Evolution in Action"
  • StaleStale Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    Who's that riding in the sun?
    Who's the man with the itchy gun?
    Who's the man who kills for fun?
    Psycho Dad, Psycho Dad, Psycho Dad.


    He sleeps with a gun
    but he loves his son
    Killed his wife 'cos she weighed a ton.
    Psycho Dad, Psycho Dad, Psycho Dad.


    A little touched or so we're told
    Killed his wife 'cos she had a cold
    Might as well she was gettin' old
    Psycho Dad, Psycho Dad, Psycho Dad.


    He's quick with a gun
    And his job ain't done.
    Killed his wife by twenty-one,
    Psycho Dad!


    Who's that riding in the sleigh?
    Who's that firing along the way?
    Who's roughing up bums on Christmas day?
    Psycho Dad, Psycho Dad, Psycho Dad


    Who's the tall, dark stranger there.
    The one with the gun and the icy stare.
    The one with the scalp of his ex-wife's hair!
    Psycho Dad, Psycho Dad, Psycho Dad!


    Who's that riding across the plain?
    Who's lost count of the wives he's slain?
    Who's the man who's plumb insane?
    Psycho Dad, Psycho Dad, Psycho Dad


    He's a durn good pa, but he hates the law.
    He's likes to eat it raw, He's Psycho Dad!

    Stale on
    easysig2.jpg
  • cadmunkycadmunky One hand on the bottle, The other a shaking fist.Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    without looking it up or knowing jack shit about that song (?), it looks to be an awesome rob zombie tune.

    cadmunky on
    5955603848_aed2690084.jpg
    "Think of it as Evolution in Action"
  • BedigunzBedigunz Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    cadmunky you need to watch Married With Children. Now.

    Seriously, the episode where Al gets stuck at the store and he wants to watch Hondo might be on the of the best episodes ever.

    Bedigunz on
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    Coran Attack!
  • StaleStale Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    Married with Children, it was Al's favorite TV show



    also:


    National Organization of Men Against Amazonian Masterhood

    Stale on
    easysig2.jpg
  • Munkus BeaverMunkus Beaver You don't have to attend every argument you are invited to. Philosophy: Stoicism. Politics: Democratic SocialistRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    edited October 2009
    No Maam

    Munkus Beaver on
    Humor can be dissected as a frog can, but dies in the process.
  • BedigunzBedigunz Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    So a fat woman came into the store today...

    Bedigunz on
    cdmAF00.png
    Coran Attack!
  • MeissnerdMeissnerd Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    Druhim wrote: »
    Stale wrote: »
    Now it is time to whore it up Stale!

    Luckily I have no need of whores.

    I found me a girl who's awesome. :)




    awwwwwwwwwwwwwww
    fuck you

    she made you get a christmas tree

    also doesn't she want you to read twilight or something else equally gay?
    and I also remember you expressing something about her terrible taste in food
    like, she dragged you to a TGIF or Chili's or something similar

    isn't she also a red head, thus invalidating all your points

    Meissnerd on
  • BedigunzBedigunz Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    Bedigunz on
    cdmAF00.png
    Coran Attack!
  • DruhimDruhim Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited October 2009
    Meissnerd wrote: »
    Druhim wrote: »
    Stale wrote: »
    Now it is time to whore it up Stale!

    Luckily I have no need of whores.

    I found me a girl who's awesome. :)




    awwwwwwwwwwwwwww
    fuck you

    she made you get a christmas tree

    also doesn't she want you to read twilight or something else equally gay?
    and I also remember you expressing something about her terrible taste in food
    like, she dragged you to a TGIF or Chili's or something similar

    isn't she also a red head, thus invalidating all your points

    wha?

    Druhim on
    belruelotterav-1.jpg
  • PiptheFairPiptheFair Frequently not in boats. Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    Druhim wrote: »
    Meissnerd wrote: »
    Druhim wrote: »
    Stale wrote: »
    Now it is time to whore it up Stale!

    Luckily I have no need of whores.

    I found me a girl who's awesome. :)




    awwwwwwwwwwwwwww
    fuck you

    she made you get a christmas tree

    also doesn't she want you to read twilight or something else equally gay?
    and I also remember you expressing something about her terrible taste in food
    like, she dragged you to a TGIF or Chili's or something similar

    isn't she also a red head, thus invalidating all your points

    wha?

    you enjoy manbutt

    PiptheFair on
  • STATE OF THE ART ROBOTSTATE OF THE ART ROBOT Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    We already knew that, Pip. God

    STATE OF THE ART ROBOT on
  • DruhimDruhim Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited October 2009
    PiptheFair wrote: »
    Druhim wrote: »
    Meissnerd wrote: »
    Druhim wrote: »
    Stale wrote: »
    Now it is time to whore it up Stale!

    Luckily I have no need of whores.

    I found me a girl who's awesome. :)




    awwwwwwwwwwwwwww
    fuck you

    she made you get a christmas tree

    also doesn't she want you to read twilight or something else equally gay?
    and I also remember you expressing something about her terrible taste in food
    like, she dragged you to a TGIF or Chili's or something similar

    isn't she also a red head, thus invalidating all your points

    wha?

    you enjoy manbutt
    PiptheFair wrote: »
    hey I like chili's fuck you dru

    Druhim on
    belruelotterav-1.jpg
  • PiptheFairPiptheFair Frequently not in boats. Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    chili's is good fuck you

    PiptheFair on
  • cadmunkycadmunky One hand on the bottle, The other a shaking fist.Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    ahahahahaha!

    i must have lost those brain cells long ago.

    cadmunky on
    5955603848_aed2690084.jpg
    "Think of it as Evolution in Action"
  • cadmunkycadmunky One hand on the bottle, The other a shaking fist.Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    shit, chili's is my crawl-to bar.

    cadmunky on
    5955603848_aed2690084.jpg
    "Think of it as Evolution in Action"
  • STATE OF THE ART ROBOTSTATE OF THE ART ROBOT Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    Ain't nothing wrong with Chili's.

    STATE OF THE ART ROBOT on
  • StaleStale Registered User regular
    edited October 2009
    Druhim wrote: »
    Meissnerd wrote: »
    Druhim wrote: »
    Stale wrote: »
    Now it is time to whore it up Stale!

    Luckily I have no need of whores.

    I found me a girl who's awesome. :)




    awwwwwwwwwwwwwww
    fuck you

    she made you get a christmas tree

    also doesn't she want you to read twilight or something else equally gay?
    and I also remember you expressing something about her terrible taste in food
    like, she dragged you to a TGIF or Chili's or something similar

    isn't she also a red head, thus invalidating all your points

    wha?

    He has a very good point

    Stale on
    easysig2.jpg
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