a dvd player that makes everything it plays have a twist ending
Upon reaching the end of Unbreakable the player [DATA EXPUNGED]
King Riptor on
I have a podcast now. It's about video games and anime!Find it here.
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#pipeCocky Stride, Musky odoursPope of Chili TownRegistered Userregular
edited June 2010
a carton of 120 packs of gum, branded by an unknown and untraceable manufacturer, each pack containing 24 sticks wrapped in paper and foil. Branded as doublemint flavour.
Originally when chewed, gum is pleasing but very weak in flavour, like gum you've been chewing for hours and just tastes like slightly minty rubber. After a period of 14 minutes of chewing (continuous or aggregate), intensity of flavour suddenly doubles and chewer now chews compulsively, portraying signs of paranoia and resisting attempts to relinquish gum.
Flavour intensity of gum redoubles exactly every 14 minutes of chewing. Paranoia and anti-social behaviours of chewer double concordantly to flavour eventually resulting in psychotic and extremely violent reactions to perceived attempts to retrieving the gum.
A cat that coughs up an endless amount of hair balls, one every five minutes at all times except when asleep. Inside the hairballs are useless trinkets like jacks, keys, lip balm, tic tacs, pen caps, and other crap.
Classified as Eulcid because of [DATA EXPUNGED] that was coughed up and [DATA EXPUNGED].
unfortunately fishmonger is threatening to sue if scp doesn't remove his shit, so even though he's being a petulant whining asshole, the bigger thing to do is to just deal with him and write new, more awesome shit (like the current project to replace wanderlust with a better story)
A group of artifacts created by an isolated order of monks who believed that to truly understand god, one must give up all their senses. To that end, they made a series of objects that when worn completely nullify one of the human senses, only removing them right before death so that they could see god's true form or something to that effect. Of the original nine objects only six remain, two were lost before the foundation discovered them and one was broken down for study.
A group of artifacts created by an isolated order of monks who believed that to truly understand god, one must give up all their senses. To that end, they made a series of objects that when worn completely nullify one of the human senses, only removing them right before death so that they could see god's true form or something to that effect. Of the original nine objects only six remain, two were lost before the foundation discovered them and one was broken down for study.
A group of artifacts created by an isolated order of monks who believed that to truly understand god, one must give up all their senses. To that end, they made a series of objects that when worn completely nullify one of the human senses, only removing them right before death so that they could see god's true form or something to that effect. Of the original nine objects only six remain, two were lost before the foundation discovered them and one was broken down for study.
these posts are reading like hp lovecraft's commonplace book
man enters building. man goes insane.
man encounters stranger. man dies suddenly.
a couple having marriage problems go into a cave
They die quickly
a couple having marriage problems go into a field
They die slowly
Faynor on
do you wanna see me eat a hotdog
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TheExAmGerrymandered your districtsRegistered Userregular
edited June 2010
Upon hearing the news that Fishmonger got banned, I quickly collected Wanderlust pages 1, 3, 5-7, 9, 10 and the Epilogue from the Google cache. The missing ones weren't cached and Wayback Machine is no help.
Should the google cache disappear, I've got those ones in txt files.
TheExAm on
Battlemans: DiscoCabbage | Elite: Dangerous: Aleksandr Khabaj
Item: SCP-826, equipped with one (1) copy of "The Generally Nice, Friendly Thing That Can And Will Kill SCP-682 Permanently if it So Much As Spots That Damn Lizard", a 12-page short story written by Dr. ██████, detailing a large, friendly monster that is stated to be capable of permanently killing SCP-682, and 1 (one) D-Class personnel (D-682-32) equipped with 1 (one) 2010 Ducati Multistrada motorcycle for the purpose of evading SCP-682.
Tissue Test Record:
N/A
Termination Test Record:
Story is put between SCP-826, and placed into large, empty room ██m X ██m X ██m in dimension, with a remotely operated doorway large enough to send SCP-682 through. SCP-682 is brought in front of the entryway securely. Once researchers clear the area, door is remotely opened, exposing a green pasture similar to the one described in the story. SCP-682 is reluctant to go through, so D-682-32 is sent through as "Bait". 682 follows through doorway, whereupon the doorway closes behind them. 30 minutes later, SCP-682 bursts back through the door it was sent through, somewhat worse for wear, killing ██ researchers and ██ agents in the process. Recovery personnel describe the story's pasture as having become a "Battleground", featuring impact craters with enormous body parts scattered around. Parts are thought to be from the story's "Thing". Recovered story is retitled "The Generally Nice, Friendly Thing That Tried To Kill SCP-682 Permanently But Failed" , and is noticeably thicker, with 209 individual pages that detail an epic battle between the two monsters.
Posts
Upon reaching the end of Unbreakable the player [DATA EXPUNGED]
Originally when chewed, gum is pleasing but very weak in flavour, like gum you've been chewing for hours and just tastes like slightly minty rubber. After a period of 14 minutes of chewing (continuous or aggregate), intensity of flavour suddenly doubles and chewer now chews compulsively, portraying signs of paranoia and resisting attempts to relinquish gum.
Flavour intensity of gum redoubles exactly every 14 minutes of chewing. Paranoia and anti-social behaviours of chewer double concordantly to flavour eventually resulting in psychotic and extremely violent reactions to perceived attempts to retrieving the gum.
Need some stuff designed or printed? I can help with that.
a couple having marriage problems go into a cave
They die quickly
Need some stuff designed or printed? I can help with that.
Classified as Eulcid because of [DATA EXPUNGED] that was coughed up and [DATA EXPUNGED].
Holy shit
What the hell
It was up when I posted that link.
Maybe see if it's in google cache or the wayback machine? It's a great story.
this is fantastic
maaaaan that sucks
son of a bitch, that was a really great work
unfortunately fishmonger is threatening to sue if scp doesn't remove his shit, so even though he's being a petulant whining asshole, the bigger thing to do is to just deal with him and write new, more awesome shit (like the current project to replace wanderlust with a better story)
Yep. What the hell, threatening legal action over this?
internet tough guy
I think he had better ideas than he had writing, but he sure did a lot of it.
I never read it.
Need some stuff designed or printed? I can help with that.
He's an asshole, and got banned for it, and now he's going to cry and take his ball home with him.
Wow what a tool. I'm glad the people commenting on that aren't putting up with that nonsense.
WELP
it makes me wonder if some dudes on Gaia talk about that awesome banana hashpipe and Potatoe, his like partner.
Need some stuff designed or printed? I can help with that.
I do this at the end of every one of my posts anyways
A group of artifacts created by an isolated order of monks who believed that to truly understand god, one must give up all their senses. To that end, they made a series of objects that when worn completely nullify one of the human senses, only removing them right before death so that they could see god's true form or something to that effect. Of the original nine objects only six remain, two were lost before the foundation discovered them and one was broken down for study.
http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-894
No damage preservation at all
Or maybe one that brings joy
just a bunch of guys smacking themselves and others in the head
Aw dang
That is good.
a couple having marriage problems go into a field
They die slowly
Should the google cache disappear, I've got those ones in txt files.
Battlemans: DiscoCabbage | Elite: Dangerous: Aleksandr Khabaj
And now the D&D version of this joke.
A couple go into a dungeon.
They die (roll 1d6)
1.Quickly
2.Slowly
3.Painfully
4.Mysteriously
5.Magically
6.DM's Choice.