It's actually kind of liberating to explore what causes my anxiety.
that seems like a perfectly rational thing to have anxieties about
like, when someone doesn't want to go outside because it makes them nervous, that's a problem
when someone doesn't want to be pierced with hooks over and over again and strung up from the ceiling like some deranged deep-water catch and they feel nervous about it, they're having an appropriate emotional reaction
I'm recovering from the PAX pox and a friend got paid yesterday and she wanted to celebrate. Fuck yeah thom yum. And then we went to the store and she got me nice things and wow I had no idea how much I needed that. Just to get out of the house after being sick and blahhh and my brain does not work with congestion.
Trying to find a form of self-care for the coming week. So far, have thought of and rejected plans to go to America, Istanbul and Venice (mostly on the grounds of cost). Debated a weekend in a seaside holiday town in Kent, then realised i LIVE in a seaside holiday town and would essentially be paying to stay somewhere almost exactly like here ...
It's actually kind of liberating to explore what causes my anxiety.
that seems like a perfectly rational thing to have anxieties about
like, when someone doesn't want to go outside because it makes them nervous, that's a problem
when someone doesn't want to be pierced with hooks over and over again and strung up from the ceiling like some deranged deep-water catch and they feel nervous about it, they're having an appropriate emotional reaction
Of course it's an appropriate emotional reaction, that's why I'm seriously considering it. It allows for the kind of self reflection that allows me to understand myself when I have those completely abnormal emotional reactions from going outside. It's tough and scary to try to figure out what causes a reaction other than "lol hooks."
Is it the anticipation of pain that scares me? The fear of injury? What if someone pulls on me? What if they start swinging me back and forth? What if I safeword and nobody lets me down?
Suddenly I realize that my anxieties don't revolve around physical harm nearly as much as a fear of embarrassment, humiliation, and a loss of control.
Weird when I went into it thinking I just didn't want to get hurt.
I've been doing creative stuff this weekend as self-care. Laid out the language generation system for LP5 and made this folio character sheet for TRANSYLVANIAN ADVENTURES, a Gothic Horror Adventure RPG that's based on DCC.
Self care is driving a long way away with a lady love and one of my oldest friends to soak in fantastically beautiful hot springs I had never been to before.
That the trip was bookended with doing things with the lady love which I probably should not describe here is just gravy
It's actually kind of liberating to explore what causes my anxiety.
that seems like a perfectly rational thing to have anxieties about
like, when someone doesn't want to go outside because it makes them nervous, that's a problem
when someone doesn't want to be pierced with hooks over and over again and strung up from the ceiling like some deranged deep-water catch and they feel nervous about it, they're having an appropriate emotional reaction
Of course it's an appropriate emotional reaction, that's why I'm seriously considering it. It allows for the kind of self reflection that allows me to understand myself when I have those completely abnormal emotional reactions from going outside. It's tough and scary to try to figure out what causes a reaction other than "lol hooks."
Is it the anticipation of pain that scares me? The fear of injury? What if someone pulls on me? What if they start swinging me back and forth? What if I safeword and nobody lets me down?
Suddenly I realize that my anxieties don't revolve around physical harm nearly as much as a fear of embarrassment, humiliation, and a loss of control.
Weird when I went into it thinking I just didn't want to get hurt.
i find my neuroses almost exclusively revolve around feelings of helplessness. if i can alter the situation or my perspective so that i feel some measure of control over matters, then most of the time things improve. a safeword and the active decision to do suspension would probably be my handles here. from what oog's said you'll probably be too blissed out in the air to worry much
lonelyahavaCall me Ahava ~~She/Her~~Move to New ZealandRegistered Userregular
@Tynic: you know what? I live in a seaside resort type city and we still went away for a weekend to a seaside resort type place. and it was amazing. You should totally still do that. Go to the water, Nic. You know that it will help you.
@Tynic: you know what? I live in a seaside resort type city and we still went away for a weekend to a seaside resort type place. and it was amazing. You should totally still do that. Go to the water, Nic. You know that it will help you.
I'm in England, anywhere around here is just a different kind of dreary. But somewhere sunny and further south might work ...
You should take a little glass bottle with you and put some sand in from the beach and a shell to bring back with you and then whenever you feel down you will always have a little bit of the beautiful beach with you to cheer you up when the uk weather is rubbish.
@Tynic: you know what? I live in a seaside resort type city and we still went away for a weekend to a seaside resort type place. and it was amazing. You should totally still do that. Go to the water, Nic. You know that it will help you.
I'm in England, anywhere around here is just a different kind of dreary. But somewhere sunny and further south might work ...
The French holidayers would have just left southern france by now but the weather and sea will still be warm - tried anything down there?
You should take a little glass bottle with you and put some sand in from the beach and a shell to bring back with you and then whenever you feel down you will always have a little bit of the beautiful beach with you to cheer you up when the uk weather is rubbish.
@Tynic: you know what? I live in a seaside resort type city and we still went away for a weekend to a seaside resort type place. and it was amazing. You should totally still do that. Go to the water, Nic. You know that it will help you.
I'm in England, anywhere around here is just a different kind of dreary. But somewhere sunny and further south might work ...
The French holidayers would have just left southern france by now but the weather and sea will still be warm - tried anything down there?
haven't really looked as yet but france is pretty easy ... I could even drive there ...
last time went to southern france just travelled around booking hotels the night before, it was actually not very expensive. Of coruse that was two people, so that cut the cost down ...
You should take a little glass bottle with you and put some sand in from the beach and a shell to bring back with you and then whenever you feel down you will always have a little bit of the beautiful beach with you to cheer you up when the uk weather is rubbish.
@Tynic: you know what? I live in a seaside resort type city and we still went away for a weekend to a seaside resort type place. and it was amazing. You should totally still do that. Go to the water, Nic. You know that it will help you.
I'm in England, anywhere around here is just a different kind of dreary. But somewhere sunny and further south might work ...
The French holidayers would have just left southern france by now but the weather and sea will still be warm - tried anything down there?
haven't really looked as yet but france is pretty easy ... I could even drive there ...
last time went to southern france just travelled around booking hotels the night before, it was actually not very expensive. Of coruse that was two people, so that cut the cost down ...
they had some special chef collaborations going on
Jenn Louis has built one of the most prestigious food empires in Portland and was recently named one of Food & Wine Magazine's Best New Chefs and competed on Top Chef Masters this season. At her two restaurants, Lincoln and Sunshine Tavern, she creates menus that celebrate the local bounty in ways that show off the distinct and bountiful Willamette Valley flavors. For this collaboration with Louis, we are using west-coast harvested sea urchin and a fruity italian pimente d'espelet to make little meringues that burst with umami. These delicate bites are gently folded into an herbaceous ice cream that is steeped in fresh mint leaves.
@Tynic: you know what? I live in a seaside resort type city and we still went away for a weekend to a seaside resort type place. and it was amazing. You should totally still do that. Go to the water, Nic. You know that it will help you.
I'm in England, anywhere around here is just a different kind of dreary. But somewhere sunny and further south might work ...
The French holidayers would have just left southern france by now but the weather and sea will still be warm - tried anything down there?
haven't really looked as yet but france is pretty easy ... I could even drive there ...
last time went to southern france just travelled around booking hotels the night before, it was actually not very expensive. Of coruse that was two people, so that cut the cost down ...
Atlanta is sunny and warm
Just saying
d'ya know what the current prices are for airline tickets london-atlanta?
@Tynic: you know what? I live in a seaside resort type city and we still went away for a weekend to a seaside resort type place. and it was amazing. You should totally still do that. Go to the water, Nic. You know that it will help you.
I'm in England, anywhere around here is just a different kind of dreary. But somewhere sunny and further south might work ...
The French holidayers would have just left southern france by now but the weather and sea will still be warm - tried anything down there?
haven't really looked as yet but france is pretty easy ... I could even drive there ...
last time went to southern france just travelled around booking hotels the night before, it was actually not very expensive. Of coruse that was two people, so that cut the cost down ...
Atlanta is sunny and warm
Just saying
d'ya know what the current prices are for airline tickets london-atlanta?
cause I do.
they're bollocks.
Now compare them to the prices to Glasgow!
We may not have sun, or warmth, or...oh wait I get why it's cheap.
Haha my family got evicted from our apartment and now we live in two small rooms in my moms house and have to constantly walk on eggshells around her for fear of being kicked out and basically nothing is relaxing ever. I saw this thread and was all "maybe I could find something relaxing to do while everyone else is asleep" and came up with painting my nails and then I realized noooope mom's not really down with the whole transgendered thing haha!
So instead I'm listening to dumb pop music wondering what my life would be like if I were an alcoholic club going type person. Is escapism self care? Is it bad that my escapism involves being an alcoholic?
Haha my family got evicted from our apartment and now we live in two small rooms in my moms house and have to constantly walk on eggshells around her for fear of being kicked out and basically nothing is relaxing ever. I saw this thread and was all "maybe I could find something relaxing to do while everyone else is asleep" and came up with painting my nails and then I realized noooope mom's not really down with the whole transgendered thing haha!
So instead I'm listening to dumb pop music wondering what my life would be like if I were an alcoholic club going type person. Is escapism self care? Is it bad that my escapism involves being an alcoholic?
People care about you.
You will get through this.
There will be better times.
Haha my family got evicted from our apartment and now we live in two small rooms in my moms house and have to constantly walk on eggshells around her for fear of being kicked out and basically nothing is relaxing ever. I saw this thread and was all "maybe I could find something relaxing to do while everyone else is asleep" and came up with painting my nails and then I realized noooope mom's not really down with the whole transgendered thing haha!
So instead I'm listening to dumb pop music wondering what my life would be like if I were an alcoholic club going type person. Is escapism self care? Is it bad that my escapism involves being an alcoholic?
Escapism is self care to an extent. If your escapism is starting to interfere with other aspects of your life (like your health, job or education), that's a problem. Alcoholism as a method of escapism is not a good thing.
I got in a fight with my girlfriend tonight and thought "I bought beer, I should drink a lot tonight and make it go away"
after a beer I went to her and apologized for being an ass, told her what bothered me and I admitted I wanted to drink away the issue.
It sounds like a good idea, and it isn't. Don't slip down that slope, just remember. Tonight isn't every night of your life, and you will be happier than you are right now. You won't die because you are in a shit situation, despite it feeling like the best option. Your life will get better than this.
Posts
"Sandra has a good solid anti-murderer vibe. My skin felt very secure and sufficiently attached to my body when I met her. Also my organs." HAIL SATAN
that seems like a perfectly rational thing to have anxieties about
like, when someone doesn't want to go outside because it makes them nervous, that's a problem
when someone doesn't want to be pierced with hooks over and over again and strung up from the ceiling like some deranged deep-water catch and they feel nervous about it, they're having an appropriate emotional reaction
My god do I owe her.
might try tenerife?
Of course it's an appropriate emotional reaction, that's why I'm seriously considering it. It allows for the kind of self reflection that allows me to understand myself when I have those completely abnormal emotional reactions from going outside. It's tough and scary to try to figure out what causes a reaction other than "lol hooks."
Is it the anticipation of pain that scares me? The fear of injury? What if someone pulls on me? What if they start swinging me back and forth? What if I safeword and nobody lets me down?
Suddenly I realize that my anxieties don't revolve around physical harm nearly as much as a fear of embarrassment, humiliation, and a loss of control.
Weird when I went into it thinking I just didn't want to get hurt.
https://www.dropbox.com/s/23n3vtfv30olmfl/charsheet.pdf
creative stuff is cool when i feel creative.
GoFund The Portland Trans Pride March, or Show It To People, or Else!
i find my neuroses almost exclusively revolve around feelings of helplessness. if i can alter the situation or my perspective so that i feel some measure of control over matters, then most of the time things improve. a safeword and the active decision to do suspension would probably be my handles here. from what oog's said you'll probably be too blissed out in the air to worry much
Democrats Abroad! || Vote From Abroad
Thinking about taking a nap.
Sundays usually mean nothing to me, but I have decided that today is very much a Sunday.
Self-care.
I'm in England, anywhere around here is just a different kind of dreary. But somewhere sunny and further south might work ...
You should take a little glass bottle with you and put some sand in from the beach and a shell to bring back with you and then whenever you feel down you will always have a little bit of the beautiful beach with you to cheer you up when the uk weather is rubbish.
The French holidayers would have just left southern france by now but the weather and sea will still be warm - tried anything down there?
So all the time?
haven't really looked as yet but france is pretty easy ... I could even drive there ...
last time went to southern france just travelled around booking hotels the night before, it was actually not very expensive. Of coruse that was two people, so that cut the cost down ...
Yeah pretty much!
Dude where are you eating because I hella want to go there
Atlanta is sunny and warm
Just saying
@usagi i was at salt and straw
they had some special chef collaborations going on
Ah mah gah
d'ya know what the current prices are for airline tickets london-atlanta?
cause I do.
they're bollocks.
Now compare them to the prices to Glasgow!
We may not have sun, or warmth, or...oh wait I get why it's cheap.
Becca and I are thinking Scotland for our honeymoon
Twitch (I stream most days of the week)
Twitter (mean leftist discourse)
That sounds like a good way to freeze to death, to me.
The water is not for touching, it's for looking at.
Steam ID - VeldrinD | SS Post | Wishlist
The way I use it, it is
then getting a haircut this afternoon while still nursing my hangover was weird but had to be done
then I watched a movie starring joseph gordon-levitt and he is so pretty
I just wish the weather was a bit less shite. I think summer is officially over.
When I cycle along the beach up here I generally see a few people surfing, so its totally possible!
(Surfing in what look like dry suits)
Edit:
North East Scotland!
Edit edit: For my own self care I'm gonna try to make it down to where that second picture is next weekend.
So instead I'm listening to dumb pop music wondering what my life would be like if I were an alcoholic club going type person. Is escapism self care? Is it bad that my escapism involves being an alcoholic?
Steam
People care about you.
You will get through this.
There will be better times.
Steam
Escapism is self care to an extent. If your escapism is starting to interfere with other aspects of your life (like your health, job or education), that's a problem. Alcoholism as a method of escapism is not a good thing.
I got in a fight with my girlfriend tonight and thought "I bought beer, I should drink a lot tonight and make it go away"
after a beer I went to her and apologized for being an ass, told her what bothered me and I admitted I wanted to drink away the issue.
It sounds like a good idea, and it isn't. Don't slip down that slope, just remember. Tonight isn't every night of your life, and you will be happier than you are right now. You won't die because you are in a shit situation, despite it feeling like the best option. Your life will get better than this.