Rubber Chicken

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  • RingoRingo HE KEEPS REPEATING THE LINE I'M GONNA CRY BLEASE LET HIM LIVE YOU MADE ME WATCH SO MUCH KISSING IN THIS FILM LET INIGO LIVERegistered User regular
    see317 wrote: »
    I think I may have a new favorite H/A thread.
    Sorry "How do I eat a root beer float?" thread, you've been replaced.

    @Local H Jay never gave us his youtube float/straw tutorial video :(

    Sterica wrote: »
    I know my last visit to my grandpa on his deathbed was to find out how the whole Nazi werewolf thing turned out.
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  • SkeithSkeith Registered User regular
    The best delivery of that sort on this board was Esh eating all those fries.

    mts wrote: »
    heres how i see it being a total win situation for you
    1. stay with your wife while she dog sits. this wins husband points since she knows its out of your comfort zone
    2. have sex all over her friends house so that the next time you see her friend look at you condescendingly, you can wink back knowing you did the freaky deaky where she eats her cheerios.
    spool32Thro
  • TNTrooperTNTrooper Registered User regular
    see317 wrote: »
    I think I may have a new favorite H/A thread.
    Sorry "How do I eat a root beer float?" thread, you've been replaced.

    I dunno "should i purchase this wine" was pretty amazing.

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    MugsleyElvenshae
  • ShogunShogun Hair long; money long; me and broke wizards we don't get along Registered User regular
    TNTrooper wrote: »
    see317 wrote: »
    I think I may have a new favorite H/A thread.
    Sorry "How do I eat a root beer float?" thread, you've been replaced.

    I dunno "should i purchase this wine" was pretty amazing.

    the lobster donut thread will always hold a special place in my heart

    MugsleyceresSmokeStacks
  • chrishallett83chrishallett83 A dagger in the dark is worth a thousand swords in the morningRegistered User regular
    I'm going to be unreasonably proud of myself if I end up picking the winner chicken here, I have to be honest with y'all.

    You might end up being the winner winner (rubber) chicken dinner!

    DrezElvenshae
  • ceresceres When the last moon is cast over the last star of morning And the future has past without even a last desperate warningRegistered User, Moderator mod
    edited August 2017
    There have been a few threads over the years that I will never ever forget that have been lost to the ages due to past database issues, sigh.

    Anyway, this thread is about the Lovecraftian horror which I have learned exists in the form of the rubber chicken; let's not risk the hastening of the tear in that veil by recalling prior experiments designed to approach it.

    ceres on
    And it seems like all is dying, and would leave the world to mourn
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  • DrezDrez Registered User regular
    I'm going to be unreasonably proud of myself if I end up picking the winner chicken here, I have to be honest with y'all.

    No offense but I put in the blood and sweat and time and effort and tears and internets to come up with my suggestions so I hope *I* win the day.

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  • DrezDrez Registered User regular
    As they say, "Winner Winner, Rubber Chicken Dinner."

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  • HandgimpHandgimp R+L=J Family PhotoRegistered User regular
    Drez wrote: »
    As they say, "Winner Winner, Rubber Chicken Dinner."

    BOOOOOOOO

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  • tarnoktarnok Registered User regular
    My chicken arrived yesterday evening. It was not as floppy as I was expecting but it does appear to be made of actual rubber and I feel that I can fold it up without any concerns about damaging the material. It is still stiff enough that you could hold it carefully by the feet and it will stand up for pictures. In short it is probably the ideal compromise between what I was expecting and my wife's requirements for vacation pictures.

    The down side is that Mrs. Tarnok is not on board with the new chicken. Our old chicken, Rupert McNugget, has already been on several trips with us and she feels that a replacement would be inauthentic. Looks like I'll be lugging the old chicken around the Virgin Islands after all :(.

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  • bowenbowen How you doin'? Registered User regular
    Why is this making me sad?

    not a doctor, not a lawyer, examples I use may not be fully researched so don't take out of context plz, don't @ me
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  • Local H JayLocal H Jay Registered User regular
    Ringo wrote: »
    see317 wrote: »
    I think I may have a new favorite H/A thread.
    Sorry "How do I eat a root beer float?" thread, you've been replaced.

    @Local H Jay never gave us his youtube float/straw tutorial video :(

    Oh holy shit I need to rectify this

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  • mtsmts Dr. Robot King Registered User regular
    tarnok wrote: »
    My chicken arrived yesterday evening. It was not as floppy as I was expecting but it does appear to be made of actual rubber and I feel that I can fold it up without any concerns about damaging the material. It is still stiff enough that you could hold it carefully by the feet and it will stand up for pictures. In short it is probably the ideal compromise between what I was expecting and my wife's requirements for vacation pictures.

    The down side is that Mrs. Tarnok is not on board with the new chicken. Our old chicken, Rupert McNugget, has already been on several trips with us and she feels that a replacement would be inauthentic. Looks like I'll be lugging the old chicken around the Virgin Islands after all :(.

    well new things are scary. maybe you need to take a couple of smaller trips where you bring both chickens. Eventually Ole' Rupert may need to go to that free range upstate and it will be a smoother transition if Chicken McChickenFace has already been out a couple times. He may be different, but will have his own quirks

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  • ChiselphaneChiselphane Registered User regular
    Perhaps a more productive angle would be to find a more convenient way to carry it rather than replace it? Given your destination that's a bit of a challenge though, I was thinking some sort of leg holster but that wouldnt work very well in shorts I think.

    Ringo
  • DarkPrimusDarkPrimus premium Registered User regular
    tarnok wrote: »
    My chicken arrived yesterday evening. It was not as floppy as I was expecting but it does appear to be made of actual rubber and I feel that I can fold it up without any concerns about damaging the material. It is still stiff enough that you could hold it carefully by the feet and it will stand up for pictures. In short it is probably the ideal compromise between what I was expecting and my wife's requirements for vacation pictures.

    The down side is that Mrs. Tarnok is not on board with the new chicken. Our old chicken, Rupert McNugget, has already been on several trips with us and she feels that a replacement would be inauthentic. Looks like I'll be lugging the old chicken around the Virgin Islands after all :(.

    You should take them both along and take pictures with the both of them.

    It's job shadowing. The new kid getting shown the ropes by the veteran on one last tour of duty.

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  • TofystedethTofystedeth veni, veneri, vamoosi Registered User regular
    Just never let Chicken McChickenface talk about his new wife and child, or Rupert McNugget talk about his retirement plans.

    It can only end in tragedy.

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  • tarnoktarnok Registered User regular
    Just never let Chicken McChickenface talk about his new wife and child, or Rupert McNugget talk about his retirement plans.

    It can only end in tragedy.

    Now I'm envisioning Rupert being eaten by a shark on our kayak outing two days before we return and gasping out "I only had two days to retirement..." as he slips beneath the waves.

    On a related note, the chicken I mentioned having to return, they don't even want it back because the shipping would cost more than the chicken and they're just going to refund the money and let me keep the chicken. So...free chicken I guess.

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  • mtsmts Dr. Robot King Registered User regular
    tarnok wrote: »
    Just never let Chicken McChickenface talk about his new wife and child, or Rupert McNugget talk about his retirement plans.

    It can only end in tragedy.

    Now I'm envisioning Rupert being eaten by a shark on our kayak outing two days before we return and gasping out "I only had two days to retirement..." as he slips beneath the waves.

    On a related note, the chicken I mentioned having to return, they don't even want it back because the shipping would cost more than the chicken and they're just going to refund the money and let me keep the chicken. So...free chicken I guess.

    never look a gift chicken in the comb

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  • Hahnsoo1Hahnsoo1 Make Ready. We Hunt.Registered User regular
    This thread has been a roller coaster of emotions.

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  • MadicanMadican No face Registered User regular
    Look all you need to do is sit Ruper McNugget next to the new chicken on the railing of the ship and just let this little problem...disappear.

  • MichaelLCMichaelLC In what furnace was thy brain? ChicagoRegistered User regular
    tarnok wrote: »
    Just never let Chicken McChickenface talk about his new wife and child, or Rupert McNugget talk about his retirement plans.

    It can only end in tragedy.

    Now I'm envisioning Rupert being eaten by a shark on our kayak outing two days before we return and gasping out "I only had two days to retirement..." as he slips beneath the waves.

    On a related note, the chicken I mentioned having to return, they don't even want it back because the shipping would cost more than the chicken and they're just going to refund the money and let me keep the chicken. So...free chicken I guess.

    It's such a poultry sum, eh?

    "Never believe management about anything anywhere." -Aistan
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  • ShogunShogun Hair long; money long; me and broke wizards we don't get along Registered User regular
    Can we get a pic of these two chickens side by side as a comparison? Also you might want to buy some of the other chickens linked in the thread.

    You know just in case.

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  • BloodySlothBloodySloth Registered User regular
    Shogun wrote: »
    Can we get a pic of these two chickens side by side as a comparison? Also you might want to buy some of the other chickens linked in the thread.

    You know just in case.

    Consider this an excellent time to start a rubber chicken review compendium/podcast.

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  • ceresceres When the last moon is cast over the last star of morning And the future has past without even a last desperate warningRegistered User, Moderator mod
    I would listen to that podcast.

    And it seems like all is dying, and would leave the world to mourn
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  • HappylilElfHappylilElf Registered User regular
    ceres wrote: »
    I would listen to that podcast.

    oh my god just the thought of having to explain why I'm listening to a podcast that reviews rubber chickens has me laughing to the point of tears

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  • tarnoktarnok Registered User regular
    Now I'm tempted. I'm just not sure I can come up with more than ten minutes of talking about a rubber chicken and I think there aren't actually more than four or five different kinds.

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  • RingoRingo HE KEEPS REPEATING THE LINE I'M GONNA CRY BLEASE LET HIM LIVE YOU MADE ME WATCH SO MUCH KISSING IN THIS FILM LET INIGO LIVERegistered User regular
    This is an amazing plan to watch hatch, but I think if you're counting chickens already you might end up running around like your head's been cut off

    Sometimes you just need to cross the road when you come to it - you'll never fly if you chicken out before the rubber meets the road

    But if you pull this off, you'll be the real cock of the walk

    Sterica wrote: »
    I know my last visit to my grandpa on his deathbed was to find out how the whole Nazi werewolf thing turned out.
    Edcrab's Exigency RPG
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  • ceresceres When the last moon is cast over the last star of morning And the future has past without even a last desperate warningRegistered User, Moderator mod
    edited August 2017
    Ringo wrote: »
    This is an amazing plan to watch hatch, but I think if you're counting chickens already you might end up running around like your head's been cut off

    Sometimes you just need to cross the road when you come to it - you'll never fly if you chicken out before the rubber meets the road

    But if you pull this off, you'll be the real cock of the walk

    I hate you.

    edit: but then I saw your sig and now I like you again.

    ceres on
    And it seems like all is dying, and would leave the world to mourn
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  • TofystedethTofystedeth veni, veneri, vamoosi Registered User regular
    tarnok wrote: »
    Now I'm tempted. I'm just not sure I can come up with more than ten minutes of talking about a rubber chicken and I think there aren't actually more than four or five different kinds.

    I have a good friend who watches YouTube videos that do reviews of MREs. It's kind of oddly interesting watching someone do a detailed description of something you never thought you'd care about.

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  • mtsmts Dr. Robot King Registered User regular
    tarnok wrote: »
    Now I'm tempted. I'm just not sure I can come up with more than ten minutes of talking about a rubber chicken and I think there aren't actually more than four or five different kinds.

    So this chicken has uh. Legs

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  • RingoRingo HE KEEPS REPEATING THE LINE I'M GONNA CRY BLEASE LET HIM LIVE YOU MADE ME WATCH SO MUCH KISSING IN THIS FILM LET INIGO LIVERegistered User regular
    ceres wrote: »
    Ringo wrote: »
    This is an amazing plan to watch hatch, but I think if you're counting chickens already you might end up running around like your head's been cut off

    Sometimes you just need to cross the road when you come to it - you'll never fly if you chicken out before the rubber meets the road

    But if you pull this off, you'll be the real cock of the walk

    I hate you.

    edit: but then I saw your sig and now I like you again.

    Before your edit, I thought the sky was falling!

    Sterica wrote: »
    I know my last visit to my grandpa on his deathbed was to find out how the whole Nazi werewolf thing turned out.
    Edcrab's Exigency RPG
    jjae2123
  • Jebus314Jebus314 Registered User regular
    Perhaps a more productive angle would be to find a more convenient way to carry it rather than replace it? Given your destination that's a bit of a challenge though, I was thinking some sort of leg holster but that wouldnt work very well in shorts I think.

    I was thinking more of an arrow holster/strapped to your back type situation. Good for the quick draw on spontaneous selfies, and also somewhat out of the way for comfort reasons.

    "The world is a mess, and I just need to rule it" - Dr Horrible
    ceresChiselphane
  • NobeardNobeard North Carolina: Failed StateRegistered User regular
    If your new chicken does not yet have a name, I nominate Johann Sebastian Bawk.

    I'm not saying we are going to have an autocratic dystopia, but things keep happening that look like they come from an autocratic dystopia.
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  • tarnoktarnok Registered User regular
    I may have inadvertently named the new chicken Floppy McNugget, Rupert's evil twin.

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  • MrsTarnokMrsTarnok Registered User new member
    edited August 2017
    Shogun wrote: »
    Can we get a pic of these two chickens side by side as a comparison? Also you might want to buy some of the other chickens linked in the thread.

    You know just in case.

    bj602zp32pzn.jpg

    Rupert is the pretty one.

    MrsTarnok on
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  • DrezDrez Registered User regular
    MrsTarnok wrote: »
    Shogun wrote: »
    Can we get a pic of these two chickens side by side as a comparison? Also you might want to buy some of the other chickens linked in the thread.

    You know just in case.

    b49tdymjqsjc.jpg
    Rupert is the pretty one.

    Maybe it's just me but I find them both attractive. The slender leftward chicken is as smooth as a slip-n-slide and the rough rightward chicken provides the friction to always get a grip on your chicken when you need one.

    This is why we have two pockets.

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  • NobeardNobeard North Carolina: Failed StateRegistered User regular
    I cant tell which one is Rupert because they are both pretty. Left chicken looks like he's about to tell a silly joke. Right chicken looks like he takes things a bit too seriously.

    I'm not saying we are going to have an autocratic dystopia, but things keep happening that look like they come from an autocratic dystopia.
    MrsTarnok
  • navgoosenavgoose Registered User regular
    My oldest got to experience Kooky Chicken in 1st grade. Kooky Chicken was a rubber chicken who was brought home by each kid for a week and they all had to update a shared journal of something they did with Kooky Chicken at home. No not that....like reading a story, watching TV or having dinner.

  • DouglasDangerDouglasDanger PennsylvaniaRegistered User regular
    Jesus Fucking Christ

    I play games on ps3 and ps4. My PSN is DouglasDanger.
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  • MugsleyMugsley Registered User regular
    Nobeard wrote: »
    If your new chicken does not yet have a name, I nominate Johann Sebastian Bawk.

    I would have suggested John Ralphio

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